Lost-II

Portalkeeper87

A/N: Writing as the episodes come. Basically Season 7, AU.

2-Curtains

"Where are you going?" I demanded, struggling to keep up with the Slayer on Prozak. She stopped so quickly that I almost ran into her.

"I thought you wanted to find Spike."

"Well, duh," I replied, with a trademark eye-roll. "It's just that, you know the Uber-Vamp? Don't you hafta get ridda him first? You know, so you can actually get to Spike for the saving."

Slayer eyes narrowed. "And I suppose you'd know how to defeat both that vampire and its master, the First, since you're so smart," she snapped.

I shrugged. "Things will work out. I'm guessing maybe you'll die, or Faith will. One or the other, in the end, to close the Hellmouth."

Confusion replaced the sarcasm on her face. "What?"

I sighed. "I read some spoilers for the show before I got here, okay? It says that in the next episode "Showtime" Anya and Giles will get info from some eye about why the First is here. And that has to do with you and Faith. So I'm guessing if Sarah Michelle Gellar signs on another year, Faith will come back the last five episodes, turn good, and jump on your behalf. If Sarah doesn't sign, decides to do something new, then you will jump, committing an oh-so-heroic act, making everyone feel sad and cry, and the experience which will somehow change Faith into a good person and she'll fight for the Light. Or, you know, the First kills everyone, the Hellmouth opens, and the world ends. But that wouldn't be good for Angel…so I doubt Joss would burn all the bridges…" I trailed off, lost in my musings.

Buffy's confusion was now completely perplexed. "What?"

"Never mind," I snapped. "Now where do you think Spike will be?"

"The cavern. Under the Christmas tree lot."

"Well, duh. But don't you have to get the Uber-Vamp first? How do we find him?"

"You're actually looking for the Turok-Han?" Buffy asked incredulously. "What, are you ins—oh shit, here it comes!"

I turned around. Saw a cute-looking little pre-vamp. "Aw, lookie, lookie here. What do we have here, a cute wittle Turok-Han? C'mere, you cute little—Yeowch!"

The Uber-Vamp took a chunk out of my arm!

"Okay, now, you're gonna regret that." He jumped at me again, but I caught him by the neck. Cool. "Now let's see how you taste, dearie."

***

Buffy vomited all over the street.

"Hey, Buffy, what's wrong? I think he tasted pretty good. Don't you think so, my wittle pumpkin?" I snapped my fingers at the now- whimpering wittle Uber-Vamp, following us like a lost doggie. "Now, get us to Spike, alright? Good boy."

"That's just sick," Buffy muttered, staring after the Turok-Han as it tore into the woods and waited for us to catch up.

I ignored her. "So, what are you gonna do with your own personal Spike?"

"What?!"

"I said, what are—"

"I heard the first time. What do you mean?"

"I mean, are you gonna start to go out with him on a real date before jumping on his bones this time? Or tell him how you really feel?"

Buffy glared at me. "I don't love him."

I laughed outright. "And did I say you did? I said tell him how you feel, Buffy, not that you love him. Unless, of course, you do."

Buffy growled. We reached the cave entrance and the Turok-Han was waiting patiently.

Buffy jumped down the cave and looked up expectantly. "Well? Aren't you gonna come down here?"

I shook my head sadly. "No, Buffy. You're his one and only. He loves you; it's only fitting that you rescue him. I'll meet you back at Chez Summers."