'S Not Fair
A/N: Dedicated to Anguipes Seraph, who gave me the idea of writing this, and the significance of Sandalphon, twin brother of the one and only Metatron, Voice of God and consummate git.
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"I shay, 's no' fair, nope."
"Dear boy, you're shlurrin quite a bit there. 'S quite funny."
"I mean, there's m' brother, who's big wig an' all that, even get's to be the Great On'es VOICE, an' it's, it's not like He needs one, omnipotent an'onmivo...omnivokle...He's got a bloody loud voice by himself. Favor'sm I tell you."
"I hope you're not questioning. Him. Because that's bloody shtupid. You get zapped. Zoom. Whoosh. Funny noises that go vroom like big cars with the canvas tops. Poof. Angel barbeque. 'S not fun. 'S not FUN at. All."
"We're TWINS. TWINS. You know, sameness, same wings, same eyes, same feet, same dead feathers when we molt. Sameness. An' so he's the Voice and gets to go BOOM! Mister Gold-Light and I-Am-Th'-Coming-Of-Him-Up-There. Bloody shtupid. An' no one ever even asks to polish Sandalphon's harp. 'S no. FAIR."
"M' friend tell...tols...anyways, about a bird. Goes to the end of the universe
in a spaceship. Y'know, the kind where dinosaurs come out the end and sharpen their beaks."
"Thought the big thingies were a joke. An' no beaks."
"What?"
"No beaks, can't sharpen until you have them. 'S not possible."
"'S not bloddy important. 'S the THOUGHT that counts."
"What thought?"
"To sharpen the beak."
"Oh. What did that have to do with that?"
"The point is that...the point...is that the point exists if you look really, really, really hard, because all things are connected. An' that fairness can be found in a sharpened beak, because it's all shiny."
"Makes sense t' me. You know, you're au'fully smart, Az'r'phale..."
"An' it's not all bad. You could be listening to Elgar. That's diabolicaler than diabolical, which is still diboliculiar than diabolics, which is also dibocaler than dibbles, which brings back Elgar, whose the only musician up there. And that's No'. Bloddy. Fair."
"'S too much for me to deal with. I wanna be sober. Maybe I'll feel better."
"Tried that. It doesn't work. Makes you feel downer. From deep, deep down,which is really deep. Want another?"
"An' I ask m'self, is it because he's prettier than me?"
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*thump* Sorry there. Reviews are pretty. So are ideas.
*
A/N: Dedicated to Anguipes Seraph, who gave me the idea of writing this, and the significance of Sandalphon, twin brother of the one and only Metatron, Voice of God and consummate git.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I shay, 's no' fair, nope."
"Dear boy, you're shlurrin quite a bit there. 'S quite funny."
"I mean, there's m' brother, who's big wig an' all that, even get's to be the Great On'es VOICE, an' it's, it's not like He needs one, omnipotent an'onmivo...omnivokle...He's got a bloody loud voice by himself. Favor'sm I tell you."
"I hope you're not questioning. Him. Because that's bloody shtupid. You get zapped. Zoom. Whoosh. Funny noises that go vroom like big cars with the canvas tops. Poof. Angel barbeque. 'S not fun. 'S not FUN at. All."
"We're TWINS. TWINS. You know, sameness, same wings, same eyes, same feet, same dead feathers when we molt. Sameness. An' so he's the Voice and gets to go BOOM! Mister Gold-Light and I-Am-Th'-Coming-Of-Him-Up-There. Bloody shtupid. An' no one ever even asks to polish Sandalphon's harp. 'S no. FAIR."
"M' friend tell...tols...anyways, about a bird. Goes to the end of the universe
in a spaceship. Y'know, the kind where dinosaurs come out the end and sharpen their beaks."
"Thought the big thingies were a joke. An' no beaks."
"What?"
"No beaks, can't sharpen until you have them. 'S not possible."
"'S not bloddy important. 'S the THOUGHT that counts."
"What thought?"
"To sharpen the beak."
"Oh. What did that have to do with that?"
"The point is that...the point...is that the point exists if you look really, really, really hard, because all things are connected. An' that fairness can be found in a sharpened beak, because it's all shiny."
"Makes sense t' me. You know, you're au'fully smart, Az'r'phale..."
"An' it's not all bad. You could be listening to Elgar. That's diabolicaler than diabolical, which is still diboliculiar than diabolics, which is also dibocaler than dibbles, which brings back Elgar, whose the only musician up there. And that's No'. Bloddy. Fair."
"'S too much for me to deal with. I wanna be sober. Maybe I'll feel better."
"Tried that. It doesn't work. Makes you feel downer. From deep, deep down,which is really deep. Want another?"
"An' I ask m'self, is it because he's prettier than me?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*thump* Sorry there. Reviews are pretty. So are ideas.
*