Hey-o, and welcome to my Lil' World of Weirdness!!
I state for the record that I don't own Gundam Wing, or the wonderful characters that will be gracing this story. . . I do however lay claim to Ensign Saratone *again*, and I use him here purely as a replacement for your average Nameless OZ Minion.
Okay, that's the legal stuff out the way!! Also much thanks goes out to my brilliant beta, Bluegoo, without her, I doubt I'd keep up coherent sentences!!
//Thinking//
"Speaking"
*Stress/Emphasis*
~*~
**Gundammit!!**
By Doctor Megalomania
Chapter 4: Duo's Gundamn Mutual Appreciation Society!!
"Oh no . . ."
Trowa narrowly escaped with his life, as he launched himself into the air to escape the stampede of Howard's men. He closed his eyes praying that Quatre was right, and that the Gundams could move by themselves, as it was a rather long fall to the ground.
He landed with a soft thud in a cupped hand, and opened his eyes to find himself staring into the intense features of ShenLong, the Gundam clucked and cocked it's head, "And what. . ." Wufei's sharp voice demanded, "Would you have done if I had not been able to catch you? Huh?!"
As he stared up silently at the massive blue, white and red visage of ShenLong Gundam, Trowa's imagination generated an image of him in traction and bandaged like a mummy. His imagination then added a couple of embellishments, such as Quatre spoon-feeding him.
"Trowa?"
And of course, there would be music and it would have to be –
"Trowa?! Wake up!"
Hm. That didn't sound like music.
"TROWA!!"
It seemed that ShenLong had actually missed the unfortunate acrobat after all, but his voice would awaken the dead. Trowa came to, rubbed the egg-shaped bump forming on the back of his head and wondered vaguely if he was hallucinating.
A couple of hours later . . .
Squeeeakk, Squeeeeeeeaaaaaaakkk!!
The landing gears protested loudly, as the silver plane landed heavily. It came to a slow stop, and a green clothed tech ran across the landing strip to fetch a passenger stair for the occupants to exit the plane.
. . . And promptly got squished by the plane's automated elevator.
Heero gazed up at Wing.
Then he looked over at Duo, who stared up at Deathscythe. They were the last two holdouts. Duo drew a deep breath and strode forward into the hanger, followed by Heero. The other pilots stood in the hands of Heavyarms, Sandrock and ShenLong. Wufei glanced down at them, and said something, which ShenLong repeated louder for him. "Onna and Baka!! So, you finally plucked up the courage!!"
Heavyarms shook his head and glared at his sibling. "You should not encourage discord amongst the pilots . . . not matter how cowardly 1 and 2 have been."
"We're not cowardly!" Duo yelled up, shaking his fist at the orange and gold Gundam, and was very happy to watch as his Gundam swung his hand at the back of Heavyarms' head. Deathscythe growled, "My pilot is not a coward!"
Sandrock chuckled, and sank down to bring his hand close to Duo and Heero. "Congratulations on successfully locating the correct hanger . . . we were fearful that you had gotten lost on the way . . ."
"Funny, Sandy, hiiiilarious!" Deathscythe barked irritated, "Gimme my pilot and go bug the 'Corps with your smartass comments, 'kay?"
Duo grinned as he jumped from Sandrock's hand to his own Gundam's, "Shinigami!!"
"Duuuuuo!!!" Deathscythe yelled back, "Buddy!!"
"Pal!" Duo hugged his Gundam's thumb, "Man, this is so cooooool!!"
"Naturally!! 'Cause we ARE the best!"
"YAY!!"
"Shut up!!" ShenLong growled, "Urgh! Enough of the mutual appreciation society!!" He paused and glanced down at Wufei who nodded his approval, ". . .besides, it is Wufei and I who are the best . . . you are all weak, stupid women!!"
"Ooooo . . ." Deathscythe swung around to Nataku, and cocked his head as he deadpanned, "The burn."
Nataku swivelled around fully, and held up his other hand, a huge plume of fire sparked there hotly for a moment, "Would you like to burn, Deathscythe? Try me, just try me!"
The pilots looked at each other as the two Gundams started to sling insults at each other. "Aw, hell . . ." swore Heavyarms, he shook his head, "Guys not again!"
"Shut the hell up!" Deathscythe snapped, and turned on Nataku again, "I'd stow it if I were you, justice-freak . . . or I'll lay into Wufei so badly, he'll be cryin' for his momma for the rest of his little life . . ."
"At least my pilot doesn't look like a woman!" Nataku retorted, "and besides Wufei doesn't cry!"
"The hell he doesn't!" Shinigami barked back, he shook a finger at the offending Gundam, "Lay off my pilot's hair . . . it's a symbol of his memory. . ."
"Womanhood!"
"Memory!"
"WOMANHOOD!!" Nataku's thrusters flared violently.
"MEMORY!!" Deathscythe's wings suddenly flicked out. "I'm tellin' ya now, Wu-ster, back off 'cause if you wanna bring it, I'll pay the postage!!"
Duo and Wufei blinked in surprise as their Gundams started to square off against each other. The Deathscythe's thermal scythe ignited, and ShenLong whirled his staff around his giant wrist, the two took up fighting position and growled at each other, and the pilot felt a surge of fear as the general feeling in the room became charged. Heero frowned, the other three Gundams seemed to glance amongst each other questioning and conversing silently. Sandrock finally nodded, and stepped forward, a cool, commanding tone overriding the gentle voice he usually used. "That's enough."
The only indication from the two sparing Gundams was a flare of thrusters, and their hands creaking as they tightened their grips.
"I said . . ." roared Sandrock, clearly angry now, "THAT'S ENOUGH!!"
Deathscythe sighed and glanced at Sandrock, "I can't even hit him about, Professor?" Sandrock cocked his head, and shook it slowly. The tension leaked out of the room easily as Deathscythe moaned, "Awwww . . . you're mean!"
She stepped out, of course . . . her unfortunate star prince!! Such a place wasn't suited for him, he needed taking care of, he needed attention of the very kindest, he needed . . . he *needed* . . .
"MISS RELENA?!" Mister Howard nearly chocked on his cigar, as she rushed up to him, her faithful butler Pargen in tow.
Yes . . . Heero needed Relena!
Wing suddenly stiffened.
Shutting down his external loudspeaker, he routed a radio transmission to his fellow Gundams, "A plane just landed, no markings."
"I sense someone is interested in us then . . ." Nataku muttered. "I sense---"
"I see dead people!"
"Shut up, Maxwell!"
"But I do!" Insisted Deathscythe, as Sandrock continued the conversation.
"What size is the plane?"
"It looks . . ." Wing trailed off quickly, and checked, "Ack! It's a private plane, it's . . ." he sighed as he hacked into the ship's central computer, "feck!"
"Feck, eh?" Deathscythe chuckled, "good ol' feck . . . been ages since duo met with good ol'—"
"SHUT UP MAXWELL!!"
"Awww . . . but Wu-doh-rey-me, it's Feck . . . everyone loves a good---"
"MAXWELL!!!"
Heero frowned as the five Gundams stopped responding, all of the Gundams had straightened and now stood facing each other as if conversing. The only one seemingly not completely involved in the conversation was Heavyarms, "What's wrong?"
Heavyarms tilted his head as he stared impassively at Heero, "What makes you think . . ." the Gundam trailed off, and stood as he too was called to join in the conversation. "What is this all about?" Quatre wondered as he and his fellow pilots stood on gangway to watch the Gundams and their silent conversation. "What can they be talking about now?"
A few moments passed like this with the Gundams just talking away before even the small movements, which indicated the conversation, ceased. All moment ceased as the Gundams turned as one to look at the door. The pilots frowned at this and turned themselves. A piercing cry filled the air.
"HEEEEEEEE—RRRRRROOOOOOOHHH!!!"
----------------------------------------
And Now It's Time To Leave It To MINI-WING-GUNDAM-CHAN!!!
Mini-Wing-Gundam-Chan: Hi, I just thought I'd make my point even clearer . . . people, you don't seem to understand that I, Mini-Wing-Gundam-Chan, am sick of being cutesy, sick of being Kawaii, Kawaii, lovely Mini-Wing-Gundam-Chan . . . I hate it!! She's got me here, and I want out . . . so . . .
DrM: There you are!! Come on!! It's time to put you in that ballerina pose, you know, the one that Heero always puts you in when you fire your buster rifle!!
Bluegoo: Hey, Wing, if you want to commit suicide, you know who to c---
Wing: AWW, HELL NO!!! I WOULD SO COMPLETELY STOMP HIM FIRST!!!
Bluegoo *Knowing smirk* Kamui. Kicks. Your. Butt.
DrM: BUT!! [whips out Gundam Wing DVD] DEATHSCYTHE HELL CUSTOM GUNDAM WOULD DEFEAT EVERYONE!!
Wing and Bluegoo: *Sweatdropping*
DrM: [puts Mini-Wing-Gundam-Chan in front of computer] look, Mini-Wing-Gundam-Chan!! Next model I want is Mini-Deathscythe-Gundam-Chan!!
Wing: Run, Deathscythe!! Run!! Readers . . . you too . . . quickly, review and then run away!!!