Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue.

Authors note: Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, Sorry. I know this is late, (really late) but real life caught up with me. After an intense struggle I have finally broken free and am back to writing. I hope you like this chapter. Review and let me know, yell at me, I don't care, just say something please. Once again I'm sorry for the lateness (Is that a word?) of this chapter, I hope you all can forgive me.

Chapter 11: In Which Harry Develops a Fear of Remote Controls

He did, however, have a very weird dream.

It started out like most of his other mundane dreams. He was back at the Dursleys cooking tons, and tons of food for his porcine cousin Dudley. He sighed as he flipped another burger. I wish I were back at Hogwarts. He thought, then shook his head. Stop thinking like that Harry or you're going to burn your hand again because you're not paying attention. He sighed again and looked down at the frying pan in his hand. Then blinked in confusion. Where did the burger go? He thought looking up,

The burger was frozen in mid air.

Now that he was paying attention he noticed it was awfully quite. Turning around he saw that his cousin was frozen too, in mid bite. This was obviously a dream.

"Wow that's neat, what is this thing?"

Harry turned to the voice and saw Selene standing in the doorway, examining the remote to the telly.

"How did you get in my dream?" He asked in confusion. Selene looked up at him, then pointed over her shoulder.

"Through the door." She said then went back to studying the remote. Harry walked over and looked. Sure enough, there was a door. Hanging in midair at that.

"Wonder what this does?" he heard Selene mumble, he looked up and watched as she pressed a button on the controller. There was a great rumbling noise then the house jerked violently.

"What did you do!" Harry yelled, trying to keep his balance. Selene didn't seem to be having much trouble in that department, she was still puzzling over the remote. Something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye. He blinked as Mrs. Figg went sailing past the window, still seated in her rocker and with "Boots" the cat in her lap. He shook that bit of weirdness off and continued to try to crawl towards Selene. There was another bang and a very hard jerk that slammed him straight into the ground. He groaned and looked up at Selene, who was still standing.

"Why is it that I get thrown around and you don't?" he asked in mild annoyance, Finally pulling himself to his feet and managing to stay upright.

" It's your dream, I'm just visiting." She said with a shrug. " I'm in control of myself and since I didn't feel like moving I don't, dream logic. You're the one who imagined yourself getting thrown all over the place."

Harry heaved a great sigh and walked over to the open front door. Then stopped in shock.

"Uh I don't think were in England anymore." He stated looking at they're colorful, and bizarre surroundings. Selene came out of the house as well and looked to, then pulled on his sleeve and pointed at something. Harry turned to see what she'd found. His eyes widened.

"Oh my god! We killed someone. Wait, why does this seem familiar?" He stopped freaking out to try and figure out were he'd seen this before. A tugging on his pants drew his attention to

"Dobby?" He asked in confusion.

"Brave sir has slain the wicked wizard of the west, we is forever grateful to him we is." Dobby said with happy tears pouring out of his large eyes.

"Huh?" He looked around and saw all the other Hogwarts School elves dressed in really weird clothing singing "Ding, Dong, the wizards dead" at the top of their lungs.

"Here sir is the evil wizards ruby hat. You keep it sir, we insist." Dobby handed harry a very beat up old hat that looked like it had been painted red.

"Sorting hat?" Harry asked looking more and more confused by the second.

"You must place me on your head then bang it against a wall three times while saying 'Voldemort throws spells like a sissy'." The sorting hat stated seriously. Harry just blinked. Right then he thought I've finally gone completely mental.

"Wonder what this one does?" he heard Selene say. He whipped around.

"No!"

"Oh but it's true." A sinister voice that Harry recognized said from in front of him. He turned and saw Voldemort in full death eater garb and holding alightsaber? No it was more like his wand but with a red light coming out the end. Looking down he noticed that he was no longer holding the sorting hat but his own wand with a blue light coming out the end.

"Excuse me?" Harry asked.

"Harry. I am your father."

" NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Harry screamed.

"Boring. What's on next." Selene said hitting the channel button.

The scenery wavered and they appeared in the woods.

"Now what movie did we end up in?" He asked. Selene cocked her head to the side.

"What's a movie?" she asked. Harry pondered how to answer that one.

"Well a movie is.."

BOOM

Harry stopped and listened intently. Then watched a puddle in the road.

BOOM

The puddle rippled.

"Oh no. Selene you'd better start running." He said in a very calm manner. Selene started jogging next to him.

"Why?" she asked looking at him in curiosity. There was a great crash behind them as a tyrannosaur burst out of the trees.

"That's why!" he yelled, breaking into "haul ass" gear. Selene blinked at the approaching monster. Then nodded. "Right." She said and started to really move.

"Quick, change it! Change it!" Harry screamed, while constantly shooting panicked looks over his shoulder at the ever decreasing distance between them and the dinosaur.

"Right!" Selene said brightly, pushing the channel button.

The atmosphere around them turned into salt and pepper for a minute then settled down into a new scene.

The first thing Harry noticed was that he was standing in the driveway of number four Privet drive. Selene was standing next to him, wearing a nice blouse and muggle jeans. He glanced down and saw that he was also wearing jeans. (Which were rather snug, he noted off-handedly) In front of them was a very big, expensive looking black truck. He snorted in disgust. 'Looks like Dudley got a new toy.'

Dudley came waddling into view from around the side of the truck, holding a rag. He started in surprise when he saw Harry.

" I-I was just s-s-starting the second coat of wax now Harry, It'll be ready in time for your date tonight." Dudley stammered then backed away and started to wax with more enthusiasm.

Harry just shook his head in confusion. Figuring that he should just play along he nodded at Dudley and turned to stare at Selene in shock. She just blinked at him. A flashing of bright lights, a loud bang, and the screeching of tires had them both spinning around to face

The Weasleys old Ford Anglia. Festooned with eccentric looking gadgetry and lightly steaming around the edges. The driver's side door burst open and Arthur Weasley stumbled out wearing strange looking wizards robes and a solid, silvery, visor-like pair of glasses. His red hair was standing out in all directions. He looked around for a minute before spotting Harry.

"Harry!" He barked, running up and grabbing Harry by the shoulders. "You must come back with me!"

Harry stared at him and waved a hand experimentally in front of the visor. He figured he might as well humor the guy, as he seemed more than a little unstable.

"Um, where?" He asked warily. Mr.Weasley lifted the visor and Harry stared into wild looking brown eyes.

"Back to the future!" he blared.

Harry blinked then started laughing so hard he couldn't breath. He managed to get only one coherent sentence out, asking Selene to change the channel. Their surroundings fuzzed again.

Harry looked up and saw another member of the Weasley family. This time it was Charlie, the dragon tamer, and he was dancing around with a bunch of animals and singing rather off key. Harry raised an eyebrow and chuckled,

"I know this one. Doctor Doolittle. Or Doctor Weasley, whichever. You can change it again." He said looking at Selene. She had a confused look on her face.

"But I can talk to the animals, Harry. Why's he singing about that? It's no big deal." She said with a shrug. Harry stared at her in a cross between amazement and exasperation.

"Just change It." he said. She shrugged and pressed the button. The scenery fuzzed again.

Owls. Lots of Owls. Everywhere he looked, every surface was covered in them. And they were all staring at him. Ominously. One landed on his head.

"Selene." He whispered.

"Yeah?" she questioned leaning over towards him.

"Change it again please" he asked very calmly. She just nodded and pushed the button as the Owls all started flying at them. One scene shift later and Harry was completely soaking wet. They were standing in the middle of a street and it was pouring down rain. Selene, however, was perfectly dry despite the water that was drenching everything, including him.

"Stupid dream logic." Harry muttered, as he wiped at his glasses. He put them on only to watch his former Quidditch captain, Oliver Wood, go skipping down the road in a yellow rain slicker singing about, of all things, singing in the rain. He shook his head and turned to Selene who mutely lifted the remote and pushed the button. Static, white noise..

It was dark, the air was sticky and hot. Harry brought his hand up and brushed cobwebs away from his face. Ominous quiet.

"Where do you think we are now?" Selene asked. Her voice echoed.

"Dunno." Harry shrugged. There was a strange rumbling noise that was beginning to bug him. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness he realized they were walking in a trench, sort of. Two ledges, one on either side of the wall, parallel to each other, seemed to ramp up from the ground and into the darkness above in the direction of the growing rumble. He stopped and tried to figure out what movie they were in this time, but was drawing a blank.

"Harry." Selene tried to get his attention by pulling on his sleeve.

" Not now Selene I'm thinking." He said waving her off. She stopped bothering him for a few seconds then.

"Harry I really think you should see this." Now he could detect distinct panic in her tone. He glanced up to see what had gotten her so upset.

Coming fast out of the gloom, Harry could see the rough granite face of a spherical bolder rumbling down the ramp toward them.

"Bloody hell." He said with much feeling. Then turned and started running. Suddenly Bill Weasley showed up out of no were wearing a leather jacket, fedora, and holding a scaly looking whip.

"Harry, do you have the idol!' he yelled while running next to him.

"What idol!" Harry yelled back. Bill looked at him in incredulous dismay.

"Don't tell me you lost it!" he said frantically. Harry glared at him.

"I never had it to begin with!" he yelled in annoyance. And while the two bickered back and forth they paid little attention to Selene's growing warnings. Finally they both were jerked to a stop and stared.. At very long, pointy looking spikes. Right in front of their faces. They both turned around to see Selene with a hand on each of their collars.

" In case you hadn't noticed we are trapped between a spiked wall and a giant boulder, that should be here to smash us in a few seconds I might add, so now isn't the time for fighting." She growled at them both.

Bill started looking all over the place, spotted something, took out his whip, grabbed it and jerked. A wall to their left opened and they all darted through seconds before the boulder smashed into the spike-covered wall. Bits of debris whizzed passed their heads as they ducked for cover.

"Selene." Harry grit out. "Give me that remote!" he yelled jumping at her. His surroundings wavered and he appeared on a boat. He didn't pay much attention since he was too busy looking for a certain wolf eared, remote totting, pain in the butt. He would have continued looking too if his worst enemy, one Draco Malfoy, hadn't come running up and started tugging on his arm.

"Quick Harry, we must get off the ship!" Malfoy said frantically. "You get on now, their only allowing women and children on the life boats, don't worry about me, I'll find another way off."

Harry opened his mouth to correct this obviously misinformed Malfoy when he heard Selene's voice from behind him.

"Nice dress Harry." She said with a laugh. He blinked then looked down and screamed. For he indeed was wearing a dress.

" Oh that just tears it! Give me that damn remote Selene." He grabbed at the remote and started trying to jerk it out of her hand. She fought back. The scene's kept changing and so did Harry outfits.

"Just one more button, please." Selene pleaded putting on her most potent puppy face. Harry resisted for an admirable ten seconds before giving in.

"Fine just one more, then you have to give me the remote. Ok?"

Selene nodded and gave him a bright smile.

"Thanks. Alright this is the one I've really wanted to push." And brought her finger down on the big red power button.

Everything went black.

Harry jerked awake with a gasp and found himself staring into a pair of bright silver eyes.

'Just a dream. Just a dream' he tried to calm his heart down. When he was sufficiently calmer he looked up at Selene again. She grinned at him.

"That was fun Harry! When can we do it again?" she said enthusiastically. Harry, who had suffered one too many shocks to his system already, passed out.

*****

Hi all! Sorry this is so late again. My computer has been giving me trouble lately. I hope this chapter while tide you over until I can get the rest of them done. The movies the Harry Potter characters appear in, in this fic are as follows: The Wizard of OZ, Star Wars, Jurassic Park, Back to the Future, Doctor Doolittle, The birds, Singing in the Rain, Indiana Jones, and Titanic. Please let me know what you think. It gives me motivation to keep going, and right now I really need it, even if its just something small it still makes me feel good about my story. thanks.