TITLE: No Doubt, Any Time
BY: Nicolle Brandle
DISCLAIMER: The Ronin Warriors/Yoroiden Samurai Troopers belong to Sunrise. The songs and lyrics "Tragic Kingdom," "Spiderwebs," "Just a Girl," and "Sunday Morning" belong to No Doubt. Please do not sue me. I can barely afford student loans and a wedding as it is.
DEDICATION: This is dedicated to Ryan, Julia, and Penn State's Anubis fan board, who contributed ideas and got the jokes. This is also dedicated to No Doubt, for helping my screwed up mind lose a few more marbles.
Tragic Kingdom
The rain poured from the flood gates of the sky onto the muddy road between the corn fields. The water ran like blood through the irrigation trails between the corn rows. Mandala slammed her fist into Salak's face. He fell to the ground, mud splashing over his body. "Welcome to the Tragic Kingdom."
Part One:
Please find your seats as we will be taking off soon.
"Good morning, Kyra."
Kyra jumped the last couple steps of the stairs as she came into the dining room. "Good morning, Anubis." She looked at the table where Anubis was sitting. Two tea cups sat in front of the book he was reading. One Anubis was drinking out of, the second was still full. "Who is the other cup of tea for?"
"You."
Kyra sat down next to Anubis and took a sip from the still full tea cup. "Thank you."
"You are most welcome."
She sat up straight and looked at the book over Anubis' shoulder. "And what have you found of interest today?"
"Oh, Kyra. You know that Carrot Top always finds something obscure and very boring to read," Dais said from the kitchen.
"Keep talking, old man, and I'll show you the fury behind my red mane."
"Both of you stop it! I don't care if it's boring or not, I'd like to know." Anubis gave Dais his best cruelly smug smile. Kyra promptly smacked him on the arm. "I said, STOP IT!" Dais laughed and Kyra shook her head in exasperation. "I give up."
Anubis smiled. "We're always this way, you should know that after living with us for the past four hundred years. Anyway, the book is about the 'Tragic Kingdom.'"
"What's that?"
Anubis pushed the book over so Kyra could see it. "The Tragic Kingdom was dreamed up by Lord Saber Stryke. It's original name was 'The Land of Corn' because that was where the food for Talpa's 'living' army came from. Saber Stryke was going to take the land and make it a kingdom of his own and try to defeat Talpa from there by cutting off the food supply. It would have worked if Talpa hadn't given up his living army for the demon soldiers he used to attack the mortal realm."
"So what happened to it?"
"Apparently, after Saber Stryke died, the land became over run with corn. The corn dried out so as to be inedible. All that's there now is the corn fields."
"But why call it 'The Tragic Kingdom?'"
"Lord Saber Stryke had intended it to be a paradise, but when he died, his successor, Balor, let it fall to ruin."
"I've never heard of a Lord Balor," Cale said as he came into the dining room.
"Neither have I," Dais said from the kitchen.
"Balor wasn't a lord, he was a demon who took over when he found the opportunity," Anubis said.
"His lieutenant was Mandala, right? Talpa always complained about her," Kyra said.
"How do you two know about this and we don't?" Cale asked.
"We were Talpa's seconds in command, remember?" Anubis said.
"Do you really think he let you see everything we did?" Kyra asked.
Dais looked into the dining room from the kitchen. "Obviously Talpa made bad choices. Carrot Top going turn-coat and all." Anubis flicked his wrist and suddenly, his spoon smacked Dais in the face and fell to the floor.
"Sounds like a day trip," Cale said.
"What?" Kyra looked at Cale.
"We'll go check out this 'Tragic Kingdom.' See if Balor is still there."
"Good idea. We can find out if the land is still viable for food production or not," Anubis said.
"Then lets wake up Sekhmet and be off," Cale said.
Part Two:
They pay homage to a king.
"What if Balor is still there, guys?" Kyra asked as she mounted her horse, Bindi.
"So long as he's not causing trouble with us, I don't think it really matters if he's there or not. One less bit of land to worry about is fine with me." Dais said. Anubis and Sekhmet mounted while Cale secured the saddle on his horse. Soon they were off.
After an hour of easy riding, the gate to the Tragic Kingdom appeared on the horizon. Anubis and Dais took the lead as they approached the gate. The gate opened and a great wind blew out, trying to push the horses back. Kyra urged Bindi forward, ahead of Dais and Anubis. She went through the gate, followed by the other warlords.
The wind suddenly died and the gate snapped shut behind them. Sekhmet and Cale jumped from their horses' backs and tried to pry the gate back open. Kyra noticed Anubis' lack of interest in the gate and followed his gaze out to the land around them.
"Oh, gods," Kyra whispered. Cale, Sekhmet, and Dais turned to look at Kyra. She pointed to the land in front of them. Corn fields. Miles and miles of corn fields spread out before them. The wind stirred up again and made the corn stalks bow to the ruined castle in the distance, surrounded by rotting fruit trees.
They started down the road in front of them, heading for the castle. The horses hoofs sticking in the muddy road. Up ahead, Kyra spotted what appeared to be a body in the road. She urged Bindi into a gallop, the others not far behind. She pulled Bindi to a halt and jumped down to inspect the body. Anubis dismounted and held the body as Kyra rolled it over. Anubis took a cloth from his pouch and wiped the man's face. Dais gasped.
"Do you know him?" Kyra asked.
Dais nodded. "He is Salak. The Lord of Magic. He was my teacher." Dais knelt down next to the man and search for a heartbeat. "He's alive.
Part Three:
Whose dreams are buried in their minds.
Kyra held the cantine to Salak's lips. As soon as the water touched his lips, he reacted. He pushed the water away and tried to sit up. Anubis' hold on him prevented him from sitting up. His grey eyes moved from face to face, desperate and wild, until Dais grabbed his hand. Salak's eyes softened.
"Dais," he whispered, "My little illusionist. You've grown up." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Let me sit up." Anubis let go and Salak sat up straight.
"What happened?" Dais asked.
"The land went bad."
"What?" Kyra said.
Salak looked at Kyra. "You must be Lady Kyra. A girl beating all the Ronin's into submission before her. Mandala always wanted to meet you." He laughed. "This, child, was once a magical place. Over time it was lost to Balor's frozen ideas. He wanted nothing but to horde the wealth of the land in the castle. His only subjects now are the corn. Mandala's wind blows them over so that they bow to him."
"Mandala. She can do this?" Anubis asked.
"Yes. His dreams of vast wealth are buried in her mind. And so anyone who comes to the Tragic Kingdom is either pushed out or beaten into submission."
"And you were beaten, I take it?" Cale said.
"Yes."
"Why did you come here?"
"To stop Balor from trying to freeze the Nether Realm."
Part Four:
His tears are frozen stiff.
Icicles drip from his eyes.
A cold wind blew across the fields suddenly, making the corn bow to the castle. Mandala looked down from the castle walls at the five warlords surrounding Salak.
"They will fight to get in. Disillusioned as they enter, they will be unaware what's behind the castle walls." She turned to the frozen body of Balor. His natural coldness freezing him through long ago. "It's written in stone. You will be overthrown by fools." She sighed. "It's a good thing you are already dead, Master."
She looked back down to the warlords. "Welcome to the Tragic Kingdom. Cornfields of popcorn have yet to spring open."
"We must get into the castle," Salak said, "And destroy Balor before he can freeze the entire Nether Realm!"
Anubis looked at Kyra. She immediately opened her mind to his influence. The Nether Realm is a warm, tropical area. It cannot be frozen. Not even Cale has that power. Anubis thought. Kyra nodded her agreement. Let's go along and storm the castle. We'll find out why after we've done so. Kyra thought.
Cale caught Kyra's attention. Well?
We go. Kyra answered.
Anubis helped Salak up.
"What is the best way to storm the castle?" Anubis asked.
Part Five:
Welcome to the Tragic Kingdom
Mandala raised the portcullis. "Let them see what's inside."
"The gates are open, Salak," Anubis said, "What does that mean?"
"Mandala must have seen you coming and given up," Salak said.
If what I've heard Talpa say of Mandala is true, then it's not bloody likely. Kyra thought.
Anubis raised an eyebrow at her. Kyra, you know better than to use such language.
Bite me.
Will the two of you stop it? You're giving me a headache. Sekhmet complained.
"Do we go in or not?" Cale asked. Anubis looked at Dais. Dais looked to Kyra. Kyra nodded.
"In we go!" Dais said.
Anubis took point with Kyra and Dais behind him, Salak in the middle, Sekhmet and Cale taking up the rear. A woman taller than Anubis stood in the courtyard. She wore no armor, no fancy dress, or embelished uniform, just a simple kimono. The kimono was white with flowers embroidered over the silk. Her long brown hair swept the floor, and her large brown eyes glittered.
"The Castle of Corn welcomes the five Ma Sho of Talpa. But, I must ask you to leave," she said.
"No, Mandala. We will not leave until we have destroyed Balor!" Salak screamed.
Anubis stepped forward. "Forgive him, he is being exceptionally rude. Would you mind telling us why we must leave? Surely if we are welcome, then there is no reason to leave."
"There is a great evil here, Oni Ma Sho Shuten. It consumes the land and makes it cold."
"It is the evil caused by Balor!" Salak tried to jump Mandala. She side stepped him and he fell, sliding in the mud.
"You only wish to destroy Balor so you yourself can control the evil within these walls, Salak. Balor's frozen body is all that remains to hold it in check," Mandala said.
"Go on," Kyra said.
"Balor cast a spell that holds the evil here in check. But the spell caused him to freeze solid. His frozen body holds the spell in place."
"And that's what will happen to you if you don't watch out, Cale," Sekhmet whispered.
Suddenly the warlords froze and looked at Sekhmet. "Did you just insult Cale?" Dais asked.
"Did Hell just freeze over?" Anubis asked.
"What's going on?" Mandala demanded.
"Sekhmet just insulted Cale," Kyra said, "That's never happened before." Kyra turned back to Mandala. "Where's Salak?"
Suddenly the sound of ice cracking boomed loudly in their ears. Frozen pieces of the demon Balor rained down on the warlords.
"You fool!" Mandala cried, "The spell is broken!" The ground started to rumble underneath the them. "Quick! Out into the fields!"
They turned and the portcullis slammed shut. Anubis grabbed Kyra and jumped to the top of the battlements, followed by Mandala and the other warlords. He set Kyra down and they all jumped to the ground as the walls started to crumble underneath them. They beat it back to the horses and the gate.
Anubis and Kyra turned and looked back. A cloud of dust covered the remains of the castle. When the dust settled, figures appeared to be crawling out of the ruins.
"What is that?" Dais asked.
"Those are the people of the Land of Corn. They died when Salak made the corn inedible. Their dead bodies started coming back to life and eating the bodies of the still living. Balor had all his minions trap the dead under the castle. I was the only one who survived the task. That's why this is called the Tragic Kingdom. The bodies of those who once lived in this land have become monsters," Mandala said.
"How do we stop them?" Kyra asked.
"They can't be killed because they are already dead. The best we can do is trap them and hold them."
"Salak is the cause of this?" Dais said.
Mandala nodded. "He was searching for a way to defeat Talpa and take over the Nether Realm. This was what he chose to do."
Part Six:
Cornfields of popcorn have yet to spring open.
"How do you stop a bunch of the living dead from attacking?" Cale asked.
"It's unusually cold in this part of the Nether Realm. The cold is what is keeping the dead from decomposing. Am I correct?" Anubis asked Mandala. She nodded.
"So logically, if we heated things up a little, the bodies would decompose faster," Kyra said, "Dais, if you would be so kind?"
"Certainly, m'lady." He turned the slowly approaching corpses. "Web of Deception!" His web spun out as he weaved an illusion of unbarable heat.
Kyra stuck the Staff of the Ancients into the ground. Anubis put his hand on her shoulder, to lend her his strength. The staff started to glow, the rings chiming. Sudden blast of energy from the staff ripped the rapidly decaying corpses into nothing. The army of the dead, fell to rest.
"That wasn't so bad, now was it?" Cale asked of Mandala. There was a soft popping sound to the left.
Kyra grabbed Cale's arm. "Let's go."
"What about Salak?" Dais asked. There was another pop.
"We are going," Anubis said, "Now!" Mandala opened the gate and they all ran out. The popping sound suddenly became louder and tons of popped corn followed them out.
"Popcorn anyone?" Sekhmet asked.
Cale ate a piece. "Needs salt."
"What about Salak?" Mandala asked.
"We'll take care of him," Kyra said, "If he ever eats his way out!"