Epilogue Two
Journal entry of B. Lestrade, Nov. 24th, 2105.
Moriarty was admitted to Midgard last week. Can't remember the diagnosis. Sever mental dementia or something long and in Latin.
According to the doctors he has continuous nightmares. About his sister, Elizabeth, and a riding accident. Supposedly he had another sister named Elizabeth. One that looked like. guess who? Watson looked all this up on the web. She fell off her horse, according to a newspaper clipping. At the age of fourteen. He was there when it happened. According to the doctors he blames himself. he's always screaming he's sorry.
I'm sorry too.
God, everybody's sorry for something. Him for killing her, Holly for leaving me, me for not caring. and_zed_ it's not getting me_anywhere_, but I can't let it go. I'm even sorry for_being_sorry.
-sigh- Supposedly he's not going recover. or at least, it's highly unlikely.
It's strange, now that he's gone, and New London is safe, it just doesn't feel right. I mean I always knew either we'd catch him or he'd catch us one day and that it would be very different, probably boring. but it's just so strange. I certainly would never have though it'd end like this. Moriarty was just about the only thing dependable in my life, sometime today, we'd be running around trying to catch him. Not any more. I could almost say I miss it. Almost. Don't know what you got till it's gone I guess. even if it is numerous near death experiences.
Remind me to go down to Midgard on Sundays. Maybe one day him and I'll be able to have a proper conversation. Maybe one day he'll be able to tell me what happened. Or, maybe, I'm grasping at straws, wanting the family I will never have. with a psychotic criminal mastermind.
God do I have a screwed up life. If that is what I want. Him as a brother and his lackey for my father.
I suppose I should talk about Fen- about Papa, let out all the grief and whatnot. I mean, I could go on about how he changed and how I was so unhappy after they took me from him. but I don't think I need too. I think it's good that he's dead. He didn't seem to be enjoying life very much.
At any rate, I wouldn't want to have to crypnotize him and have him forget. And I couldn't keep chasing after him pretending that one day I was going to actually catch him. That probably sounds really selfish. Which, admittedly it is. but. would either of us have enjoyed it?
Mind you, if he hadn't died then I would of. sometimes I wonder if that wouldn't have been better for everyone. It really is worse for those left behind.
I just wish I could help him, Moriarty. Help him understand it wasn't his fault. but I can't. I- I. if I did, and he became sane and confirmed that this was all true. and I was really his sister. I don't know if I want to know for sure. I don't know if I want it to be real.
I don't want to be his sister, I hate him!
-silence-
But I don't hate him. And I can't make up my mind and what if I'm crazy like he is? What if-. what if?
Oh zed, I need help. but there is no one.
No, yes there is.
I think I'm going to go on vacation to Ireland.
-silence-
At least, in the end, I still have Holly.
End recording.
Journal entry of B. Lestrade, Nov. 24th, 2105.
Moriarty was admitted to Midgard last week. Can't remember the diagnosis. Sever mental dementia or something long and in Latin.
According to the doctors he has continuous nightmares. About his sister, Elizabeth, and a riding accident. Supposedly he had another sister named Elizabeth. One that looked like. guess who? Watson looked all this up on the web. She fell off her horse, according to a newspaper clipping. At the age of fourteen. He was there when it happened. According to the doctors he blames himself. he's always screaming he's sorry.
I'm sorry too.
God, everybody's sorry for something. Him for killing her, Holly for leaving me, me for not caring. and_zed_ it's not getting me_anywhere_, but I can't let it go. I'm even sorry for_being_sorry.
-sigh- Supposedly he's not going recover. or at least, it's highly unlikely.
It's strange, now that he's gone, and New London is safe, it just doesn't feel right. I mean I always knew either we'd catch him or he'd catch us one day and that it would be very different, probably boring. but it's just so strange. I certainly would never have though it'd end like this. Moriarty was just about the only thing dependable in my life, sometime today, we'd be running around trying to catch him. Not any more. I could almost say I miss it. Almost. Don't know what you got till it's gone I guess. even if it is numerous near death experiences.
Remind me to go down to Midgard on Sundays. Maybe one day him and I'll be able to have a proper conversation. Maybe one day he'll be able to tell me what happened. Or, maybe, I'm grasping at straws, wanting the family I will never have. with a psychotic criminal mastermind.
God do I have a screwed up life. If that is what I want. Him as a brother and his lackey for my father.
I suppose I should talk about Fen- about Papa, let out all the grief and whatnot. I mean, I could go on about how he changed and how I was so unhappy after they took me from him. but I don't think I need too. I think it's good that he's dead. He didn't seem to be enjoying life very much.
At any rate, I wouldn't want to have to crypnotize him and have him forget. And I couldn't keep chasing after him pretending that one day I was going to actually catch him. That probably sounds really selfish. Which, admittedly it is. but. would either of us have enjoyed it?
Mind you, if he hadn't died then I would of. sometimes I wonder if that wouldn't have been better for everyone. It really is worse for those left behind.
I just wish I could help him, Moriarty. Help him understand it wasn't his fault. but I can't. I- I. if I did, and he became sane and confirmed that this was all true. and I was really his sister. I don't know if I want to know for sure. I don't know if I want it to be real.
I don't want to be his sister, I hate him!
-silence-
But I don't hate him. And I can't make up my mind and what if I'm crazy like he is? What if-. what if?
Oh zed, I need help. but there is no one.
No, yes there is.
I think I'm going to go on vacation to Ireland.
-silence-
At least, in the end, I still have Holly.
End recording.