Whee! Sankyu all for your nice reviews! So many... *is overwhelmed* BTW, sorry for the delay of this chapter, but thank CinderellaxVan for getting me to work on this again. *rubs bruises from where Cinderella 'persuaded' her* This chappie's for ya Ingrid!
Fushizen na: Van is really a nurse. Really really. The reason for the summary is, "Doctor, I mean, NURSE Van" is because I thought most people would think Van as being a doctor, not a male nurse. It just wouldn't make sense to me that even though he was an orphan, he was able to get into medical school, though I'm not saying it couldn't happen. From what I know, you can get a degree in nursing at a community college, but I'm not sure. Sorry about the confusion. ^^;;
jess131346: I'm mad? *is confuzzled* Like crazy mad, or I'm-going-to-kill-people-who-don't-like-my-story mad? Because I assure you, I'm not the latter at all. *whistles innocently as she hides the bodies of evil evil people*
Ruby: Is Van that big of a pervert that he would do something to Hitomi when she slept over? *thinks for a minute* Yes, yes he would. But he was probably too tired to.
Hitomi-chan: Does Van come across as being that perverted to everyone? It's because of the sponge bath scene, isn't it? But you got to remember, he was embarrassed to when his hand slipped.
Rai Dorian: Yay! Glad to bring you over to the V/H side! LOL I'm not saying that D/H stories like yours are bad (far from it you talented author you).
Mystical Dreamer: I would probably say they're all twenty-fivish? I really didn't give it much thought. And Hitomi probably realize that Van missing their date was an honest mistake.
Bellerein21: *blushes* Sankyu for the nice adjectives. And I agree, V and H forever and ever!
Dariel: I know, I cried slightly when writing about Van and Merle's past, especially Merle's. I took my inspiration from a poignant book called "A Child Called It" (I think that's the right title). And just because of your worrying about poor Lia, I decided to include her in this chappie.
Esca-lover: I probably would be more upset too, but you got to remember, this is Van. You can't be mad at him for too long. ;p
CinderellaxVan: I thanked you last chappie, even though you didn't review it on ff.net. Hee hee, I don't know why you read this story still, you know what's going to happen already. *dances to the Apple a Day MP3 you gave her* ^^;;
luna: I know! If that were the case, I would fake being sick! *cough cough*
SabineballZ: Hee, I'm glad you like it ^^
Charlie: Will do. ^_^
Paige Moonsword: Aah! I can't believe you reviewed! *is so honored*
van lover: Jello is gooooooooooooooooooooood. ^_^;;
Fae Rain: Hee hee, I'm glad you liked it (sorry for being redundant, I'm tired ^^).
kindest reviewer: Sorry for taking so long. This chapter ends on a cliffhanger too though ^^;;
SabrinaYutsuki: Yay! *likes being on favorite lists*
Ria Fanel: Isn't he though? *huggles Van plushie*
I guess now that this is the best time to tell you guys that there will be a lemon (my first V/H one; WOOT!) in this story. But to keep it PG-13 for the innocent, this is the censored version. If you want to read the full NC 17 chapter, go to my bio to find the link (ff.net wouldn't let put it for some reason), and check out my Van and Hitomi shrine while you're at it, PWEASE?
An Apple A Day
"You're late," Hitomi playfully admonished as Van came running up to her, breathing heavily. "For a minute there I thought you were going to bail on me again."
"I'm never going to be able to live that down, am I?" Van groaned, rolling his eyes into the back of his head. Hitomi interlocked her arm with his and tugged it with a smile. "Maybe if you tell me why you wanted us to meet in the park, wearing shorts and a tee-shirt, I might just forget about it for today."
Van brightened at the prospect and his eyes twinkled mysteriously. "All I can tell you is that, since it's a beautiful day out, I planned to jog with you over the hospital where I have a surprise for you."
"You planned on jogging? With me?" Hitomi asked incredulously, looking at Van like he had gone crazy. Well, crazier for the most part. "You do remember what I won a gold medal for, right?"
"Yeah, but I thought you would take it easy on a poor out of shape guy like me," Van joked, fluttering his eyelashes dramatically. Hitomi snorted, not at his antics, but at the fact that what he considered his 'out of shape' body was anything but. Even with his shirt on, Hitomi could see the outlines of the taunt muscles in his chest, and his well formed legs suggested that he could keep his own in the track department. Well, Hitomi figured, there's only one way to find out, sticking her tongue out at Van as she took a headstart. Her action only took a second to register in Van's mind before he chased after her, shouting, "Hey! No fair!"
Grinning in determination, Hitomi put on an extra burst of speed, the scenery flying past her. She thought she had outrun Van, which was why she was so surprised when he tackled her from behind onto the grass. He then began to thoroughly tickle her until her eyes watered and her sides ached. "Ahahaha...Van! Stop...hahaha....stop! Please! I'm sorr-Ha ha! No more!"
Somehow, Hitomi managed to roll over and change positions with Van, and she smirked evilly. "Now it's my turn..."
The words died on her lips as Van gazed intensely at her, his eyes turbulent with emotion. As he leaned up slowly, she closed her eyes reflexively as his mouth joined hers in a heated union. His kiss was warm and soft, and tasted salty, sweet, and fresh all at the same time; it tasted like Van.
After a few seconds, Van broke away, almost regretfully it seemed, and made a pillow out of one arm for his head and used the other to bring Hitomi closer to his side. Ignoring the people who were probably staring at them for being out of breath and sprawled out on the grass, Hitomi snuggled into Van's chest, the sound of his heart beating furiously pounding in her ear. She listened to the rhythmic boom intently, and was drifting off to sleep when a gurgle coming from his stomach startled Hitomi. She looked up at Van curiously, and he confessed, "Sorry. I'm hungry."
"Me too," Hitomi giggled, pushing off the ground to stand up, dusting grass clippings off the back of her shorts. Van soon followed suit, and grabbed her hand to pull her along. "C'mon, I know this great ice cream shop just ahead..."
"Van?" A voice called behind them. Van turned and smiled brightly. "Millerna! What's up?"
As the pretty blonde woman came up to them, Hitomi couldn't help but stiffen. This was the female doctor Van had always talked about? Hitomi couldn't help but feel jealous at their animated chatter, until Van gave her hand a squeeze. "Millerna Aston, this is Hitomi Kanzaki."
Millerna's eyes lit up immediately. "Oh, so you're the one that tried to fend off Van and his sponge bath! I don't blame you, and I apologize, but we were really understaffed that day."
Hitomi blushed deeply and glanced down at her feet. "I may have overreacted a little bit..."
"Not at all. I would've complained about it too. Anyways, has he told you where he's taking you yet?"
"Crap, I almost forgot! We'll have to take our ice cream to go," Van lamented, pouting comically. Millerna smirked and took Hitomi's hand. "Van, tell you what, how about Hitomi just tells you what she wants, and you'll bring it to her. Us girls need to talk for a little bit. As long as that's okay with you, Hitomi."
"S-sure. Van, if they have chocolate chip cookie dough, I'll take that. If not, strawberry," Hitomi instructed, and watched Van run out of sight.
"I've been meaning to find you and thank you."
Shocked by the other woman's statement, Hitomi echoed in confusion, "Thank me? Why?"
"I can tell it only took you a couple of weeks to notice what took me three years of working with him. Van tries to keep a happy face, but inside, he's hurting. You can see it in his eyes," Millerna stated sadly, leaning against a pole. "But with you, he seems truly happy, even if it is just temporary."
"Millerna, I worry about him..," Hitomi admitted, chewing on her bottom lip. "Sometimes, he's laughing and smiling, and other times he's so quiet and serious, so much that I fear for him. I wonder which is the real Van, and whether or not it has to do with his brother's death."
"Ah, so you know about that. No doubt it's definitely a factor. Van and I first met when I was finishing my last years of residency. After observing him in action, I offhandedly remarked that he should be a doctor instead of a nurse. He disagreed, pointing out that he didn't make enough money, especially because he was pay Merle's tuition as well as his own. 'Besides,' he explained, 'it's not that I have anything against doctors, but it seems that nurses interact and help the patient more. The more I help people, the more I hope to atone for what I did.' I had no idea what he had meant, until I found out about his past."
"He blames himself for some reason," Hitomi concluded, sighing as she lounged on a park bench. Millerna nodded, and stood up straight as she saw Van approaching. "Can I trust you to find out why, Hitomi? Nobody knows, not even Merle. Well, I have to go. I'll see you guys later."
"What did you guys talk about when I was gone? Was it me?" Van asked, presenting Hitomi with her ice cream and helping her to her feet. Hitomi bit her tongue and forced a smile for Van's benefit. "You know we were, but don't let it go to your head. By the way, just exactly what kind of ice cream is this?"
Van snickered as Hitomi stared at his 'masterpiece'. "The bottom half is chocolate cookie dough, but then they ran out, so the top scoop is strawberry. Is that okay?"
"Actually, it's pretty good. I should have it more often. Hey, I thought you were allergic to oranges," Hitomi mentioned, eyeing Van's orange and cream sherbet warily. Van chuckled and patted his pocket. "It's most likely artificial flavoring, but just in case, I have an epi-pen with me."
"Is it that good?"
"No, it's that DAMN good," Van stressed, nearly inhaling it. Hitomi did likewise to her cone , and the only sounds made between them was the two eating, until Van broke the air with a sort of nostalgic look on his face. "This just brought back the time when my brother Folken bought me one of these, but it was made from natural ingredients. That was the day that we also found out I was allergic to oranges...Hitomi, Merle told me that she explained to you about me...and my family. And I just wanted to...apologize for not telling you myself. Do you forgive me?"
Stopping in her tracks, Hitomi stared incredulously at Van. Did he just...Oh, Van...wait, what do I say...I...just...
"Hitomi?"
"You have ice cream on your nose," Hitomi blurted out, and automatically covered her mouth with her hands. "That's-that's not what I meant...what I meant to say was...err..."
Van cocked his brow at her, and then burst out laughing. "You know, you could've just said 'yes'. But thanks for the heads up about the nose thing."
"No problem," Hitomi muttered, mentally slapping herself for being so stupid, but immediately brightened when she felt Van hesitantly take her free hand in his. She took it willingly, and giggled inwardly as Van swung it like a child.
Hitomi never realized how close the park was to the hospital until they were walking through the front doors. Taking the last bite out of his cone, Van threw away the rest and covered Hitomi's eyes with his hands. "Okay, now I'm going to show your surprise, but no peeking."
"Va-an, your hands are all sticky!"
"Whiner. Fine, keep your eyes close real quick. There, is that better?"
"Eww! Did you just lick your fingers?"
"No, I just wiped them off with a napkin wet from a water fountain!"
"Uh huh. Admit it, you licked them."
"Do you want your surprise or not?" Van growled in her ear. Hitomi answered by kissing the nearest body part she could reach, to which Van responded, "You know, that was my eye."
"Ooops, but it's not my fault I can't see. When are we going to be there?" Hitomi huffed, tired of being led in complete darkness. It wasn't until Van opened a large door that she could feel light, but she could hear birds singing as well. "Van, why are we back outside...?"
"Van!! Hitomi!!"
Finally Van removed her hands, and as her eyes adjusted to the light, Hitomi searched for who had called for them until her eyes laid on a person she never expected to see out in the hospital courtyard. "Lia? What are you doing here?!"
"I get to go home today!" the girl exclaimed, running around, despite the complaints of her parents. Hitomi gasped, and grinned widely. "That's great and all, but why so soon?"
Lia shook her head in a matter-of-fact way, looking very comical. "Hi-to-mi, I've been in here for over two months. I'm all better, isn't that right, Van?"
Van nodded, bending down to ruffle Lia's hair. "That's right. After her surgery, Lia made an amazing recovery. She'll have to have checkups regularly, and have come back in a couple weeks to get some stitches taken out, but now she's officially outpatient."
"Yep yep! I'm glad you made it Van. I was thinking you wouldn't show," Lia announced, pouting slightly. Van smiled stoically, and giving the girl a hug, assured, "Nah, I wouldn't miss saying goodbye to you."
The girl then whispered something to Van that Hitomi couldn't hear, to which he laughed and nodded. Lia then went over to Hitomi, and handed over her medal. "I guess you want this back, huh?"
Closing the girl's hands back around it, Hitomi suggested quietly, "Why don't you keep it?"
Hesitantly for a second, Lia pushed the medal back. "No, because I promised to give it back when I'm better, and I'm better now, and I want to stay better, so I can win one of my own someday."
Touched by the girl's maturity and spirit, Hitomi could only utter, "Lia..."
"Thank you for everything. I think that because of the both of you and your generosities, Lia was able to recover faster," Lia's father stated, placing a hand on his daughter's shoulder. "And because of that, my wife and I are eternally grateful."
"Bye bye Hitomi! Bye bye Van!" Lia called, waving her hand frantically. Hitomi waved back, and Van shouted back, "See ya later, kiddo!"
Sighing happily as she observed Lia and her parents walk off, Hitomi leaned against Van. "I'm so glad she turned out all right."
"Yeah," Van agreed, "but I can't say I'm not going to miss her. We all miss her, but that's the job. Somebody's gotta do it."
Standing on her tiptoes, Hitomi placed a kiss on Van's forehead. "And I'm glad it's you."
Before Hitomi could resume resting her head on his shoulder, Van grabbed her chin lightly and asked, "Hey, you can see now. Why do you keep missing?"
Confused at what he meant first, Hitomi finally understood and kissed him fully on his lips, hungry for the taste ever since the first kiss she ever got from him. He was gentle, and never pushed her do anything, but when she opened her mouth for access, he gratefully took the chance. It was delirious, intoxicating; it made her head spin, and yet they both could never get enough. Unfortunately, the need to breathe broke them apart, and they plopped down under the nearest tree, the shade cooling them from the blazing sun. Wrapping Van's around her, Hitomi nuzzled her head into the nape of Van's neck, and questioned innocently, "Hey, what did Lia whisper to you?"
"I was wondering when you were going to ask that," Van chuckled, making Hitomi's head bob. "She asked if she could be the flower girl at our wedding."
Stiffening, Hitomi furrowed her eyebrows. "Are we that obvious?"
Van rolled his eyes and teased, "Before or after we started making out in the hospital courtyard? You know, most couples reserve the janitor's closet for that sort of thing."
After being playfully smacked by Hitomi (to which he feigned pain and claimed he had a bruise), Van explained, "I couldn't say 'no', because I didn't want to disappoint her. Sorry."
"I'm not upset about it actually," Hitomi admitted, closing her eyes to slits. "Do you have to work today?"
Searching through his pocket to look at his beeper, Van glanced at the screen quickly. "So far, I just have the night shift, which shouldn't be until a few hours. I probably should get some sleep."
"Sounds good to me," Hitomi yawned, about to take that nap she was planning to have earlier. Before she drifted off, she glanced up at Van, who was already snoozing. I think I'm in love with you, Van Fanel.
Unbeknownst to the two, they were being watched from a window, which was currently bursting with giggles. "Oh my god, do you see that? They're so cute!"
"Probably tired from all that 'exercise'."
"Oh shush Merle. What, are you jealous?"
"What? Me? No, of course not. Van's like a big brother to me, and I really like Hitomi, it's just that...I've never seen him this happy around anyone, not even me."
"That's true love for you."
"...I hope you're right Millerna. For both of their sakes, I hope you're right."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
As she came around the corner for her weekly visit, Hitomi couldn't help but notice an unusual crowd hanging around the burn center. Searching through the group, she called to a tuft of pink hair. "Merle!"
"Hitomi! You won't believe what happened!" Merle cried, pushing through the people to get to the other woman. "There had been a fire, and V-van went back in to-"
Merle didn't have a chance to finish her sentence before Hitomi dashed to the front of the group, only to be restrained by two firefighters. "Let me go!! Van's in there!! Van!! VAN!!"
"I'm sorry ma'am, but this area is restricted. The fire has been extinguished, yet there's still heavy smoke. Don't worry, we have three of our men in there right now to get all the civilians out," one of the firefighters calmly explained, pushing her gently to the side. Hitomi stood there fearfully until she felt Millerna tap her on the shoulder. "Shh, Hitomi. I'm sure it'll be okay. Van wouldn't want you to be sad because of him."
"Mi-ll-er-na..," Hitomi sobbed, collapsing to the floor. Millerna was stroking her hair and cooing softly when the door suddenly opened. Smoke poured into the hall, and Van stumbled out with an unconscious child in his arms, frowning at the tears in Hitomi's shocked eyes. "Hitomi, what's w-"
Coughs that racked his ribs interrupted Van's question Millerna to stand up and take charge. "Put them both on oxygen and treat them for smoke inhalation. Anybody who is not essential, evacuate the building like you were told to a half hour ago. Now!"
As he was forced into a wheel chair and an oxygen mask was pulled over his head, Van frantically grasped Hitomi's hands and mouthed 'Stay' as best as he could. Hitomi nodded, allow a small smile through her tears, jogging as he was being pushed down the hall, never letting go.
And she was still holding Van's hand when he woke in a hospital bed. He was trying to remember when he passed out when he noticed Hitomi staring at him, her attempt to remain unruffled failing miserably. "H-hey."
"Hey," Van croaked, trying not to wince in pain front of Hitomi, but she saw through his act and lost her composure, her teardrops gushing down her face. "Van...I was...so scared that...that I would never see you again..."
Van brushed a wayward strand of hair out Hitomi's face, whispering in his hoarse voice, "I'm okay, don't worry..."
Wiping her puffy eyes, Hitomi hiccuped and leaned over in awkward position into Van's embrace. Soon Van's gown was soaked from her tears, but neither of them cared as they lay there, grateful for each other's presence.
"Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"
"Geez Merle, can't you at least knock?" Van muttered as Hitomi shrunk back to her seat near his bed. The other girl was livid as she continued her tirade, "Stop joking around Van Slanzar de Fanel!! Just what the hell did you think you were doing?!"
"Merle..," Hitomi started, but Van held up a hand. "I was looking out for the safety of my patients."
Merle seemed to madden at Van's calm response, and raised her hand as almost to slap him. "At what cost Van?! If you died, who would care for them?! I could throttle you right now..."
"But you won't, and instead will take Hitomi down to the food court," Millerna announced, coming up behind Merle and forcing the girl's hand down. Hitomi looked down at Van in hesitation, but after assuring herself he would be fine without her for a few minutes, wearily followed Merle. Van let out a gush of air; keeping up the appearance that he was fine had taken a lot out of his already deplenished strength. He watched Millerna flip through his chart, and weakly joked, "What's the diagnosis, doctor?"
"Quite bad I'm afraid. It appears you have a case of heroitious, coupled with stubborniatic flu, and a quite full grown hardhead," Millerna grinned, placing the chart back on the foot of the bed. "Oh, and just a little touch of smoke inhalation, but nothing I'm sure you can't handle."
Managing a slight chuckle, Van coughed painfully and asked, "Is there any mention of me being lovesick on there?"
"Hrm, no, but I recognize the symptoms arising in you," Millerna continued the banter before adding in a more serious tone, "I also think you and anybody you're in close contact with have the risk of contracting a broken heart." "I get it, I get it. Merle's drilled it in my head enough today I think. I won't do anything like that again," Van sighed, running his fingers through his sweaty hair. Millerna shook her head and grabbed his forearm, staring into his eyes. "No, I don't think you get it Van. Not really. See, Merle and I are used to your antics, and we know this job is what drives you. Well, what used to drive you. But now, you have Hitomi, and your drive has changed. She's what your supposed to live for. Yes, we save lives, and we lose some too, but in the end, a job's a job. But Hitomi...Van do you get what I'm saying? It's so obvious that you both love each other, and I've never seen someone care about you like she does for you. She's worried about you, and frankly, Merle and I are too."
"I'm fine," Van replied in a defensive tone, turning over to his side. "And I appreciate if you guys don't talk about me behind my back like that."
Shaking her head, Millerna opened the door and stepped halfway out into the hallway. "Whatever Van. I'll see you later."
As the door closed, it blocked light from the hallway, making the room grow dark. But he could still make out the swirls in the peach wallpaper as he mulled over what Millerna had just said. Love? Really? Did he love Hitomi?
Yes! Yes! YES! His mind screamed at him, causing Van to wince. Okay, now that he DEFINITELY knew he loved her, just what exactly did that mean?
...
He wasn't sure.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
For the millionth time, Van tugged on his shirt collar, feeling it grow tighter it with every passing minute. He probably should pay attention to what the guy at the podium was saying, since it did concern him after all, but the man droned on and on. He peered out into the front audience, shaking in silent mirth as Merle's eyes drooped and Millerna's new blonde boyfriend pull a sly one by yawning and placing his arm behind her, only to have it pushed back into his lap. Van then looked at Hitomi, and was taken back on how stunning she looked in the backless evening dress whose material formed to her body like a glove and matched her sparkling green eyes. She noticed him looking at her, and smiled earnestly up at him, causing his heart to thump hard in his chest. He now wished he was able to drive to the award ceremony with her, but he had insisted on working his assigned shift today, making all his rounds in a rented tuxedo. Thankfully, nothing too messy had occurred, but he did receive a few laughs, as well as a few flirtations. But he ignored them all, his mind only on tonight and seeing Hitomi, and as soon as he got this award, he'd rush right over to her. Finally, the hospital director finished his speech and introduced Van, "And now, the hero of the hour, Van Slanzar de Fanel everyone!"
Shaking the director's hand, Van accepted the award and stood in front of the audience, feeling slightly embarrassed, but with the quiet encouragement emanating from Hitomi he was able to speak, "First off, I'd like to thank Mr. Fassa and the rest of the Board of Directees for this award. Second, I'd like thank the firefighters, who probably should deserve this award more than I do. They did their job, and thankfully, no one was seriously hurt. I know this award is supposed to congratulate me for my heroism, but to tell you the truth, what I did was not exactly wrong but foolhardy. Again, I thank the firefighters who helped me through the smoke to get my patients out; if not for them, I don't think I would be standing in front of you all today. Most people in similar cases would most likely say that their life was flashing in front of their eyes, but for me, my mind was only focusing on three things: my patients, my fellow colleagues and friends, and my Hitomi."
Admist the applause, Van searched for Hitomi's face to see the surprise registered on there. Truth be told, he was shocked himself that he had said the last part, but slowly grinned, now glad he did. Their eyes were locked for a few minutes, and Van barely heard the director announcing that everybody should feel free and eat dinner now, despite the fact that man was right next to him. Resisting the urge to jump off the stage, Van trotted down the stage steps, and before Hitomi could offer him a glass of wine she had got from one of the trays being passed around, he kissed her deeply, flashes from photojournalist's cameras going off around them. Hitomi's then moved up towards Van's ear as she whispered, "Mind telling me what that was for?"
"You're beautiful," Van responded, now taking the glass of wine she had offered him earlier. Sipping it slowly, Van placed his hand on the small of Hitomi's back and ushered her near the closest doors, only to be stopped by the hospital director. "Van! Is this the lovely lady you were just mentioning up there?"
"Hitomi, this is Mr. Fassa, the director of the hospital," Van explained. The director took Hitomi's hand and kissed it, chuckling, "Please, just call me Meiden. 'Mr. Fassa' makes me sound old, though I probably am, ha ha! So, Van, are you and Hitomi going to stay and enjoy your dinner?"
"Unfortunately, we already have a prearranged appointment," Van answered, causing Hitomi to glance u at him in question, to which Van's eyes seemed to say 'Trust me.' Meiden winked at them and let them pass. "In that case, better let the two of you get going. It's a shame you can't stay, but I understand."
Thanking Meiden again, Van gently pushed Hitomi out of the banquet room, much to her protest. "Van wait! I have to put down the glasses!"
"Just leave them on the table near the door; the staff will take care of them. By the way, who's Millerna's new boytoy?" Van asked nonchalantly as he guided Hitomi down the hallway, which was practically empty due to the time of night. Van didn't particularly like the blush that flashed on Hitomi's cheeks as she tittered, "Who, Allen? He was so great when he drove us all here, telling us stories of his old lacrosse team, the Crusaders. And he not only opened Millerna's door for her, but Merle's and mine too. In fact, after dinner, he had invited us out to coffee."
Gulping to get rid of the growing lump in his throat, Van tried to hide the twinge of jealousy in his voice as he dryly commented, "Maybe you should go back with him then."
"If I had wanted to go with them instead, don't you think I would've told you already? I mean, hanging out with Allen, Millerna, and Merle would be nice and all, but I much more interested in this 'prearranged appointment' you claim we have," Hitomi assured him, planting a chaste kiss on his mouth. It would've been longer if not for the interruption provided by the rumbling of Hitomi's stomach. "Though I do wish we at least stayed for dinner. I'm starving."
"I'm hungry too," Van replied huskily, his warm breath tickling her ear. Hitomi was about to suggest getting something to eat when she noticed the smoldering heat in his eyes and realized they were talking about two different things. The first thought that came to her mind was Too soon!, but then she really considered how long she had know Van. It had been nearly three months since the 'incident' where the two met, eleven weeks since they were supposed to go on their first date, ten weeks since Van made up for their first date (he had taken her to her favorite Japanese grill, Sakura), five weeks since their walk in the park, three weeks since the fire, one week since he was released from the hospital, and 2 seconds since she had last kissed him. Despite her knowledge of all this, it felt like Hitomi had known Van forever. He must've sensed her discomfort, for he sighed before offering, "There's a little cafe down the street..."
Hitomi smiled coyly as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'll have whatever you're having."
Grinning wickedly, Van continued to lead through hallways which became increasingly less empty, until there was no one but the two left. Finally, Van dug out of his pockets to unlock the door in front of them, to which Hitomi crinkled her nose. "A hospital room? That's sort of..."
Laughing to himself, Van opened the door to reveal a modestly furnished room. "Relax. These are the rooms that the hospital lets family of patients sleep in, sort of like a hotel, except this week hardly sees any customers. Of course, we can go someplace else."
"I'm just glad it's not a janitor's closet," Hitomi mumbled, and then pulled down on Van's head to give him a kiss. He groaned, and without his lips leaving hers, muttered, "Wait, let me lock the door first."
- - - - - Where Cut Sex Scene Would Be - - - -
Although she wanted the feeling to last forever, Hitomi knew that soon people, specifically Millerna and Merle, would be wondering where they both where. But her heart screamed at the thought of either one leaving the other one, and so Hitomi thought frantically of a way to stall for time.
Suddenly remembering the scars Merle had told her about, Hitomi hesitantly questioned, "Van? Can I see your back?"
Without a word, he rolled over, providing Hitomi with a full view of his backside. They were there, deep marks in his tanned skin. She trailed her finger around them, causing him to flinch. Hitomi grew alarmed and sat up slightly. "I'm sorry! Did that hurt?"
Van shook his head, his words muffled by the pillow. "No. It's just that I'm not used to anyone but doctors touching them."
Relaxing, Hitomi slid back down on the bed. "Well, I think they're beautiful."
" 'Beautiful'?" Van repeated ruefully, staring at the wall as Hitomi continued to trace the scars. She sighed blissfully as she leaned against him. "Uh-huh. They remind me of angel wings."
A hollow sound erupted from Van's throat, and Hitomi struggled to recognize what it was until she realized he was laughing. But it wasn't the carefree chuckles that she relished in every time; no, this was cold, grating, and self-deprecating. "I'm not an angel. Far from it. And they're not beautiful. They're ugly. I'm ugly."
"No! You're not!" Hitomi shouted in shock as Van slid his feet off the bed, still not facing her. "Yeah, I am. Truth is, if not for my brother Folken, I wouldn't have them. I'd be dead. But because of me, my brother's dead. And my parents are dead."
Hitomi reached out for him, but he stood up and slammed the palm of his hand against the wall. "Don't you get it! They're dead! And I killed them! Oh god I killed them!"
Jumping off the bed, Hitomi clung to him, yelling, "Van, Van, what are you saying?!"
"My...my best friend at the time...Dilandau....he gave me them...the matches...and I...then the house...so hot," Van finally sobbed, collapsing to the ground. Hitomi couldn't help but gasp, but tried to hide it as Van turned towards her, grabbing her shoulders as he continued, "I've been such a coward. I've been telling myself for the last couple of years that it was an accident, but...but why? Why did they die and I live?"
Wincing at the pain of Van's fingernails digging into her skin was the last thing Hitomi wanted to do, but Van noticed it and quickly dropped his arms to the sides, his eyes downcast as he stood up. "I cause suffering to all those I get close too. My parents. My brother. And now you, Hitomi, the only woman I've ever loved."
Haphazardly redressing, Van then looked at the glistening tears in Hitomi's, and smiled dispiritedly. "You don't deserve this."
"Are you saying I don't deserve you?" Hitomi cried, struggling to grab his hand. "Answer me! Do you think I don't deserve you?!"
Opening the door solemnly, Van replied coldly, "No, Hitomi. You just don't deserve to be hurt by me."
Fushizen na: Van is really a nurse. Really really. The reason for the summary is, "Doctor, I mean, NURSE Van" is because I thought most people would think Van as being a doctor, not a male nurse. It just wouldn't make sense to me that even though he was an orphan, he was able to get into medical school, though I'm not saying it couldn't happen. From what I know, you can get a degree in nursing at a community college, but I'm not sure. Sorry about the confusion. ^^;;
jess131346: I'm mad? *is confuzzled* Like crazy mad, or I'm-going-to-kill-people-who-don't-like-my-story mad? Because I assure you, I'm not the latter at all. *whistles innocently as she hides the bodies of evil evil people*
Ruby: Is Van that big of a pervert that he would do something to Hitomi when she slept over? *thinks for a minute* Yes, yes he would. But he was probably too tired to.
Hitomi-chan: Does Van come across as being that perverted to everyone? It's because of the sponge bath scene, isn't it? But you got to remember, he was embarrassed to when his hand slipped.
Rai Dorian: Yay! Glad to bring you over to the V/H side! LOL I'm not saying that D/H stories like yours are bad (far from it you talented author you).
Mystical Dreamer: I would probably say they're all twenty-fivish? I really didn't give it much thought. And Hitomi probably realize that Van missing their date was an honest mistake.
Bellerein21: *blushes* Sankyu for the nice adjectives. And I agree, V and H forever and ever!
Dariel: I know, I cried slightly when writing about Van and Merle's past, especially Merle's. I took my inspiration from a poignant book called "A Child Called It" (I think that's the right title). And just because of your worrying about poor Lia, I decided to include her in this chappie.
Esca-lover: I probably would be more upset too, but you got to remember, this is Van. You can't be mad at him for too long. ;p
CinderellaxVan: I thanked you last chappie, even though you didn't review it on ff.net. Hee hee, I don't know why you read this story still, you know what's going to happen already. *dances to the Apple a Day MP3 you gave her* ^^;;
luna: I know! If that were the case, I would fake being sick! *cough cough*
SabineballZ: Hee, I'm glad you like it ^^
Charlie: Will do. ^_^
Paige Moonsword: Aah! I can't believe you reviewed! *is so honored*
van lover: Jello is gooooooooooooooooooooood. ^_^;;
Fae Rain: Hee hee, I'm glad you liked it (sorry for being redundant, I'm tired ^^).
kindest reviewer: Sorry for taking so long. This chapter ends on a cliffhanger too though ^^;;
SabrinaYutsuki: Yay! *likes being on favorite lists*
Ria Fanel: Isn't he though? *huggles Van plushie*
I guess now that this is the best time to tell you guys that there will be a lemon (my first V/H one; WOOT!) in this story. But to keep it PG-13 for the innocent, this is the censored version. If you want to read the full NC 17 chapter, go to my bio to find the link (ff.net wouldn't let put it for some reason), and check out my Van and Hitomi shrine while you're at it, PWEASE?
"You're late," Hitomi playfully admonished as Van came running up to her, breathing heavily. "For a minute there I thought you were going to bail on me again."
"I'm never going to be able to live that down, am I?" Van groaned, rolling his eyes into the back of his head. Hitomi interlocked her arm with his and tugged it with a smile. "Maybe if you tell me why you wanted us to meet in the park, wearing shorts and a tee-shirt, I might just forget about it for today."
Van brightened at the prospect and his eyes twinkled mysteriously. "All I can tell you is that, since it's a beautiful day out, I planned to jog with you over the hospital where I have a surprise for you."
"You planned on jogging? With me?" Hitomi asked incredulously, looking at Van like he had gone crazy. Well, crazier for the most part. "You do remember what I won a gold medal for, right?"
"Yeah, but I thought you would take it easy on a poor out of shape guy like me," Van joked, fluttering his eyelashes dramatically. Hitomi snorted, not at his antics, but at the fact that what he considered his 'out of shape' body was anything but. Even with his shirt on, Hitomi could see the outlines of the taunt muscles in his chest, and his well formed legs suggested that he could keep his own in the track department. Well, Hitomi figured, there's only one way to find out, sticking her tongue out at Van as she took a headstart. Her action only took a second to register in Van's mind before he chased after her, shouting, "Hey! No fair!"
Grinning in determination, Hitomi put on an extra burst of speed, the scenery flying past her. She thought she had outrun Van, which was why she was so surprised when he tackled her from behind onto the grass. He then began to thoroughly tickle her until her eyes watered and her sides ached. "Ahahaha...Van! Stop...hahaha....stop! Please! I'm sorr-Ha ha! No more!"
Somehow, Hitomi managed to roll over and change positions with Van, and she smirked evilly. "Now it's my turn..."
The words died on her lips as Van gazed intensely at her, his eyes turbulent with emotion. As he leaned up slowly, she closed her eyes reflexively as his mouth joined hers in a heated union. His kiss was warm and soft, and tasted salty, sweet, and fresh all at the same time; it tasted like Van.
After a few seconds, Van broke away, almost regretfully it seemed, and made a pillow out of one arm for his head and used the other to bring Hitomi closer to his side. Ignoring the people who were probably staring at them for being out of breath and sprawled out on the grass, Hitomi snuggled into Van's chest, the sound of his heart beating furiously pounding in her ear. She listened to the rhythmic boom intently, and was drifting off to sleep when a gurgle coming from his stomach startled Hitomi. She looked up at Van curiously, and he confessed, "Sorry. I'm hungry."
"Me too," Hitomi giggled, pushing off the ground to stand up, dusting grass clippings off the back of her shorts. Van soon followed suit, and grabbed her hand to pull her along. "C'mon, I know this great ice cream shop just ahead..."
"Van?" A voice called behind them. Van turned and smiled brightly. "Millerna! What's up?"
As the pretty blonde woman came up to them, Hitomi couldn't help but stiffen. This was the female doctor Van had always talked about? Hitomi couldn't help but feel jealous at their animated chatter, until Van gave her hand a squeeze. "Millerna Aston, this is Hitomi Kanzaki."
Millerna's eyes lit up immediately. "Oh, so you're the one that tried to fend off Van and his sponge bath! I don't blame you, and I apologize, but we were really understaffed that day."
Hitomi blushed deeply and glanced down at her feet. "I may have overreacted a little bit..."
"Not at all. I would've complained about it too. Anyways, has he told you where he's taking you yet?"
"Crap, I almost forgot! We'll have to take our ice cream to go," Van lamented, pouting comically. Millerna smirked and took Hitomi's hand. "Van, tell you what, how about Hitomi just tells you what she wants, and you'll bring it to her. Us girls need to talk for a little bit. As long as that's okay with you, Hitomi."
"S-sure. Van, if they have chocolate chip cookie dough, I'll take that. If not, strawberry," Hitomi instructed, and watched Van run out of sight.
"I've been meaning to find you and thank you."
Shocked by the other woman's statement, Hitomi echoed in confusion, "Thank me? Why?"
"I can tell it only took you a couple of weeks to notice what took me three years of working with him. Van tries to keep a happy face, but inside, he's hurting. You can see it in his eyes," Millerna stated sadly, leaning against a pole. "But with you, he seems truly happy, even if it is just temporary."
"Millerna, I worry about him..," Hitomi admitted, chewing on her bottom lip. "Sometimes, he's laughing and smiling, and other times he's so quiet and serious, so much that I fear for him. I wonder which is the real Van, and whether or not it has to do with his brother's death."
"Ah, so you know about that. No doubt it's definitely a factor. Van and I first met when I was finishing my last years of residency. After observing him in action, I offhandedly remarked that he should be a doctor instead of a nurse. He disagreed, pointing out that he didn't make enough money, especially because he was pay Merle's tuition as well as his own. 'Besides,' he explained, 'it's not that I have anything against doctors, but it seems that nurses interact and help the patient more. The more I help people, the more I hope to atone for what I did.' I had no idea what he had meant, until I found out about his past."
"He blames himself for some reason," Hitomi concluded, sighing as she lounged on a park bench. Millerna nodded, and stood up straight as she saw Van approaching. "Can I trust you to find out why, Hitomi? Nobody knows, not even Merle. Well, I have to go. I'll see you guys later."
"What did you guys talk about when I was gone? Was it me?" Van asked, presenting Hitomi with her ice cream and helping her to her feet. Hitomi bit her tongue and forced a smile for Van's benefit. "You know we were, but don't let it go to your head. By the way, just exactly what kind of ice cream is this?"
Van snickered as Hitomi stared at his 'masterpiece'. "The bottom half is chocolate cookie dough, but then they ran out, so the top scoop is strawberry. Is that okay?"
"Actually, it's pretty good. I should have it more often. Hey, I thought you were allergic to oranges," Hitomi mentioned, eyeing Van's orange and cream sherbet warily. Van chuckled and patted his pocket. "It's most likely artificial flavoring, but just in case, I have an epi-pen with me."
"Is it that good?"
"No, it's that DAMN good," Van stressed, nearly inhaling it. Hitomi did likewise to her cone , and the only sounds made between them was the two eating, until Van broke the air with a sort of nostalgic look on his face. "This just brought back the time when my brother Folken bought me one of these, but it was made from natural ingredients. That was the day that we also found out I was allergic to oranges...Hitomi, Merle told me that she explained to you about me...and my family. And I just wanted to...apologize for not telling you myself. Do you forgive me?"
Stopping in her tracks, Hitomi stared incredulously at Van. Did he just...Oh, Van...wait, what do I say...I...just...
"Hitomi?"
"You have ice cream on your nose," Hitomi blurted out, and automatically covered her mouth with her hands. "That's-that's not what I meant...what I meant to say was...err..."
Van cocked his brow at her, and then burst out laughing. "You know, you could've just said 'yes'. But thanks for the heads up about the nose thing."
"No problem," Hitomi muttered, mentally slapping herself for being so stupid, but immediately brightened when she felt Van hesitantly take her free hand in his. She took it willingly, and giggled inwardly as Van swung it like a child.
Hitomi never realized how close the park was to the hospital until they were walking through the front doors. Taking the last bite out of his cone, Van threw away the rest and covered Hitomi's eyes with his hands. "Okay, now I'm going to show your surprise, but no peeking."
"Va-an, your hands are all sticky!"
"Whiner. Fine, keep your eyes close real quick. There, is that better?"
"Eww! Did you just lick your fingers?"
"No, I just wiped them off with a napkin wet from a water fountain!"
"Uh huh. Admit it, you licked them."
"Do you want your surprise or not?" Van growled in her ear. Hitomi answered by kissing the nearest body part she could reach, to which Van responded, "You know, that was my eye."
"Ooops, but it's not my fault I can't see. When are we going to be there?" Hitomi huffed, tired of being led in complete darkness. It wasn't until Van opened a large door that she could feel light, but she could hear birds singing as well. "Van, why are we back outside...?"
"Van!! Hitomi!!"
Finally Van removed her hands, and as her eyes adjusted to the light, Hitomi searched for who had called for them until her eyes laid on a person she never expected to see out in the hospital courtyard. "Lia? What are you doing here?!"
"I get to go home today!" the girl exclaimed, running around, despite the complaints of her parents. Hitomi gasped, and grinned widely. "That's great and all, but why so soon?"
Lia shook her head in a matter-of-fact way, looking very comical. "Hi-to-mi, I've been in here for over two months. I'm all better, isn't that right, Van?"
Van nodded, bending down to ruffle Lia's hair. "That's right. After her surgery, Lia made an amazing recovery. She'll have to have checkups regularly, and have come back in a couple weeks to get some stitches taken out, but now she's officially outpatient."
"Yep yep! I'm glad you made it Van. I was thinking you wouldn't show," Lia announced, pouting slightly. Van smiled stoically, and giving the girl a hug, assured, "Nah, I wouldn't miss saying goodbye to you."
The girl then whispered something to Van that Hitomi couldn't hear, to which he laughed and nodded. Lia then went over to Hitomi, and handed over her medal. "I guess you want this back, huh?"
Closing the girl's hands back around it, Hitomi suggested quietly, "Why don't you keep it?"
Hesitantly for a second, Lia pushed the medal back. "No, because I promised to give it back when I'm better, and I'm better now, and I want to stay better, so I can win one of my own someday."
Touched by the girl's maturity and spirit, Hitomi could only utter, "Lia..."
"Thank you for everything. I think that because of the both of you and your generosities, Lia was able to recover faster," Lia's father stated, placing a hand on his daughter's shoulder. "And because of that, my wife and I are eternally grateful."
"Bye bye Hitomi! Bye bye Van!" Lia called, waving her hand frantically. Hitomi waved back, and Van shouted back, "See ya later, kiddo!"
Sighing happily as she observed Lia and her parents walk off, Hitomi leaned against Van. "I'm so glad she turned out all right."
"Yeah," Van agreed, "but I can't say I'm not going to miss her. We all miss her, but that's the job. Somebody's gotta do it."
Standing on her tiptoes, Hitomi placed a kiss on Van's forehead. "And I'm glad it's you."
Before Hitomi could resume resting her head on his shoulder, Van grabbed her chin lightly and asked, "Hey, you can see now. Why do you keep missing?"
Confused at what he meant first, Hitomi finally understood and kissed him fully on his lips, hungry for the taste ever since the first kiss she ever got from him. He was gentle, and never pushed her do anything, but when she opened her mouth for access, he gratefully took the chance. It was delirious, intoxicating; it made her head spin, and yet they both could never get enough. Unfortunately, the need to breathe broke them apart, and they plopped down under the nearest tree, the shade cooling them from the blazing sun. Wrapping Van's around her, Hitomi nuzzled her head into the nape of Van's neck, and questioned innocently, "Hey, what did Lia whisper to you?"
"I was wondering when you were going to ask that," Van chuckled, making Hitomi's head bob. "She asked if she could be the flower girl at our wedding."
Stiffening, Hitomi furrowed her eyebrows. "Are we that obvious?"
Van rolled his eyes and teased, "Before or after we started making out in the hospital courtyard? You know, most couples reserve the janitor's closet for that sort of thing."
After being playfully smacked by Hitomi (to which he feigned pain and claimed he had a bruise), Van explained, "I couldn't say 'no', because I didn't want to disappoint her. Sorry."
"I'm not upset about it actually," Hitomi admitted, closing her eyes to slits. "Do you have to work today?"
Searching through his pocket to look at his beeper, Van glanced at the screen quickly. "So far, I just have the night shift, which shouldn't be until a few hours. I probably should get some sleep."
"Sounds good to me," Hitomi yawned, about to take that nap she was planning to have earlier. Before she drifted off, she glanced up at Van, who was already snoozing. I think I'm in love with you, Van Fanel.
Unbeknownst to the two, they were being watched from a window, which was currently bursting with giggles. "Oh my god, do you see that? They're so cute!"
"Probably tired from all that 'exercise'."
"Oh shush Merle. What, are you jealous?"
"What? Me? No, of course not. Van's like a big brother to me, and I really like Hitomi, it's just that...I've never seen him this happy around anyone, not even me."
"That's true love for you."
"...I hope you're right Millerna. For both of their sakes, I hope you're right."
As she came around the corner for her weekly visit, Hitomi couldn't help but notice an unusual crowd hanging around the burn center. Searching through the group, she called to a tuft of pink hair. "Merle!"
"Hitomi! You won't believe what happened!" Merle cried, pushing through the people to get to the other woman. "There had been a fire, and V-van went back in to-"
Merle didn't have a chance to finish her sentence before Hitomi dashed to the front of the group, only to be restrained by two firefighters. "Let me go!! Van's in there!! Van!! VAN!!"
"I'm sorry ma'am, but this area is restricted. The fire has been extinguished, yet there's still heavy smoke. Don't worry, we have three of our men in there right now to get all the civilians out," one of the firefighters calmly explained, pushing her gently to the side. Hitomi stood there fearfully until she felt Millerna tap her on the shoulder. "Shh, Hitomi. I'm sure it'll be okay. Van wouldn't want you to be sad because of him."
"Mi-ll-er-na..," Hitomi sobbed, collapsing to the floor. Millerna was stroking her hair and cooing softly when the door suddenly opened. Smoke poured into the hall, and Van stumbled out with an unconscious child in his arms, frowning at the tears in Hitomi's shocked eyes. "Hitomi, what's w-"
Coughs that racked his ribs interrupted Van's question Millerna to stand up and take charge. "Put them both on oxygen and treat them for smoke inhalation. Anybody who is not essential, evacuate the building like you were told to a half hour ago. Now!"
As he was forced into a wheel chair and an oxygen mask was pulled over his head, Van frantically grasped Hitomi's hands and mouthed 'Stay' as best as he could. Hitomi nodded, allow a small smile through her tears, jogging as he was being pushed down the hall, never letting go.
And she was still holding Van's hand when he woke in a hospital bed. He was trying to remember when he passed out when he noticed Hitomi staring at him, her attempt to remain unruffled failing miserably. "H-hey."
"Hey," Van croaked, trying not to wince in pain front of Hitomi, but she saw through his act and lost her composure, her teardrops gushing down her face. "Van...I was...so scared that...that I would never see you again..."
Van brushed a wayward strand of hair out Hitomi's face, whispering in his hoarse voice, "I'm okay, don't worry..."
Wiping her puffy eyes, Hitomi hiccuped and leaned over in awkward position into Van's embrace. Soon Van's gown was soaked from her tears, but neither of them cared as they lay there, grateful for each other's presence.
"Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"
"Geez Merle, can't you at least knock?" Van muttered as Hitomi shrunk back to her seat near his bed. The other girl was livid as she continued her tirade, "Stop joking around Van Slanzar de Fanel!! Just what the hell did you think you were doing?!"
"Merle..," Hitomi started, but Van held up a hand. "I was looking out for the safety of my patients."
Merle seemed to madden at Van's calm response, and raised her hand as almost to slap him. "At what cost Van?! If you died, who would care for them?! I could throttle you right now..."
"But you won't, and instead will take Hitomi down to the food court," Millerna announced, coming up behind Merle and forcing the girl's hand down. Hitomi looked down at Van in hesitation, but after assuring herself he would be fine without her for a few minutes, wearily followed Merle. Van let out a gush of air; keeping up the appearance that he was fine had taken a lot out of his already deplenished strength. He watched Millerna flip through his chart, and weakly joked, "What's the diagnosis, doctor?"
"Quite bad I'm afraid. It appears you have a case of heroitious, coupled with stubborniatic flu, and a quite full grown hardhead," Millerna grinned, placing the chart back on the foot of the bed. "Oh, and just a little touch of smoke inhalation, but nothing I'm sure you can't handle."
Managing a slight chuckle, Van coughed painfully and asked, "Is there any mention of me being lovesick on there?"
"Hrm, no, but I recognize the symptoms arising in you," Millerna continued the banter before adding in a more serious tone, "I also think you and anybody you're in close contact with have the risk of contracting a broken heart." "I get it, I get it. Merle's drilled it in my head enough today I think. I won't do anything like that again," Van sighed, running his fingers through his sweaty hair. Millerna shook her head and grabbed his forearm, staring into his eyes. "No, I don't think you get it Van. Not really. See, Merle and I are used to your antics, and we know this job is what drives you. Well, what used to drive you. But now, you have Hitomi, and your drive has changed. She's what your supposed to live for. Yes, we save lives, and we lose some too, but in the end, a job's a job. But Hitomi...Van do you get what I'm saying? It's so obvious that you both love each other, and I've never seen someone care about you like she does for you. She's worried about you, and frankly, Merle and I are too."
"I'm fine," Van replied in a defensive tone, turning over to his side. "And I appreciate if you guys don't talk about me behind my back like that."
Shaking her head, Millerna opened the door and stepped halfway out into the hallway. "Whatever Van. I'll see you later."
As the door closed, it blocked light from the hallway, making the room grow dark. But he could still make out the swirls in the peach wallpaper as he mulled over what Millerna had just said. Love? Really? Did he love Hitomi?
Yes! Yes! YES! His mind screamed at him, causing Van to wince. Okay, now that he DEFINITELY knew he loved her, just what exactly did that mean?
...
He wasn't sure.
For the millionth time, Van tugged on his shirt collar, feeling it grow tighter it with every passing minute. He probably should pay attention to what the guy at the podium was saying, since it did concern him after all, but the man droned on and on. He peered out into the front audience, shaking in silent mirth as Merle's eyes drooped and Millerna's new blonde boyfriend pull a sly one by yawning and placing his arm behind her, only to have it pushed back into his lap. Van then looked at Hitomi, and was taken back on how stunning she looked in the backless evening dress whose material formed to her body like a glove and matched her sparkling green eyes. She noticed him looking at her, and smiled earnestly up at him, causing his heart to thump hard in his chest. He now wished he was able to drive to the award ceremony with her, but he had insisted on working his assigned shift today, making all his rounds in a rented tuxedo. Thankfully, nothing too messy had occurred, but he did receive a few laughs, as well as a few flirtations. But he ignored them all, his mind only on tonight and seeing Hitomi, and as soon as he got this award, he'd rush right over to her. Finally, the hospital director finished his speech and introduced Van, "And now, the hero of the hour, Van Slanzar de Fanel everyone!"
Shaking the director's hand, Van accepted the award and stood in front of the audience, feeling slightly embarrassed, but with the quiet encouragement emanating from Hitomi he was able to speak, "First off, I'd like to thank Mr. Fassa and the rest of the Board of Directees for this award. Second, I'd like thank the firefighters, who probably should deserve this award more than I do. They did their job, and thankfully, no one was seriously hurt. I know this award is supposed to congratulate me for my heroism, but to tell you the truth, what I did was not exactly wrong but foolhardy. Again, I thank the firefighters who helped me through the smoke to get my patients out; if not for them, I don't think I would be standing in front of you all today. Most people in similar cases would most likely say that their life was flashing in front of their eyes, but for me, my mind was only focusing on three things: my patients, my fellow colleagues and friends, and my Hitomi."
Admist the applause, Van searched for Hitomi's face to see the surprise registered on there. Truth be told, he was shocked himself that he had said the last part, but slowly grinned, now glad he did. Their eyes were locked for a few minutes, and Van barely heard the director announcing that everybody should feel free and eat dinner now, despite the fact that man was right next to him. Resisting the urge to jump off the stage, Van trotted down the stage steps, and before Hitomi could offer him a glass of wine she had got from one of the trays being passed around, he kissed her deeply, flashes from photojournalist's cameras going off around them. Hitomi's then moved up towards Van's ear as she whispered, "Mind telling me what that was for?"
"You're beautiful," Van responded, now taking the glass of wine she had offered him earlier. Sipping it slowly, Van placed his hand on the small of Hitomi's back and ushered her near the closest doors, only to be stopped by the hospital director. "Van! Is this the lovely lady you were just mentioning up there?"
"Hitomi, this is Mr. Fassa, the director of the hospital," Van explained. The director took Hitomi's hand and kissed it, chuckling, "Please, just call me Meiden. 'Mr. Fassa' makes me sound old, though I probably am, ha ha! So, Van, are you and Hitomi going to stay and enjoy your dinner?"
"Unfortunately, we already have a prearranged appointment," Van answered, causing Hitomi to glance u at him in question, to which Van's eyes seemed to say 'Trust me.' Meiden winked at them and let them pass. "In that case, better let the two of you get going. It's a shame you can't stay, but I understand."
Thanking Meiden again, Van gently pushed Hitomi out of the banquet room, much to her protest. "Van wait! I have to put down the glasses!"
"Just leave them on the table near the door; the staff will take care of them. By the way, who's Millerna's new boytoy?" Van asked nonchalantly as he guided Hitomi down the hallway, which was practically empty due to the time of night. Van didn't particularly like the blush that flashed on Hitomi's cheeks as she tittered, "Who, Allen? He was so great when he drove us all here, telling us stories of his old lacrosse team, the Crusaders. And he not only opened Millerna's door for her, but Merle's and mine too. In fact, after dinner, he had invited us out to coffee."
Gulping to get rid of the growing lump in his throat, Van tried to hide the twinge of jealousy in his voice as he dryly commented, "Maybe you should go back with him then."
"If I had wanted to go with them instead, don't you think I would've told you already? I mean, hanging out with Allen, Millerna, and Merle would be nice and all, but I much more interested in this 'prearranged appointment' you claim we have," Hitomi assured him, planting a chaste kiss on his mouth. It would've been longer if not for the interruption provided by the rumbling of Hitomi's stomach. "Though I do wish we at least stayed for dinner. I'm starving."
"I'm hungry too," Van replied huskily, his warm breath tickling her ear. Hitomi was about to suggest getting something to eat when she noticed the smoldering heat in his eyes and realized they were talking about two different things. The first thought that came to her mind was Too soon!, but then she really considered how long she had know Van. It had been nearly three months since the 'incident' where the two met, eleven weeks since they were supposed to go on their first date, ten weeks since Van made up for their first date (he had taken her to her favorite Japanese grill, Sakura), five weeks since their walk in the park, three weeks since the fire, one week since he was released from the hospital, and 2 seconds since she had last kissed him. Despite her knowledge of all this, it felt like Hitomi had known Van forever. He must've sensed her discomfort, for he sighed before offering, "There's a little cafe down the street..."
Hitomi smiled coyly as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'll have whatever you're having."
Grinning wickedly, Van continued to lead through hallways which became increasingly less empty, until there was no one but the two left. Finally, Van dug out of his pockets to unlock the door in front of them, to which Hitomi crinkled her nose. "A hospital room? That's sort of..."
Laughing to himself, Van opened the door to reveal a modestly furnished room. "Relax. These are the rooms that the hospital lets family of patients sleep in, sort of like a hotel, except this week hardly sees any customers. Of course, we can go someplace else."
"I'm just glad it's not a janitor's closet," Hitomi mumbled, and then pulled down on Van's head to give him a kiss. He groaned, and without his lips leaving hers, muttered, "Wait, let me lock the door first."
Although she wanted the feeling to last forever, Hitomi knew that soon people, specifically Millerna and Merle, would be wondering where they both where. But her heart screamed at the thought of either one leaving the other one, and so Hitomi thought frantically of a way to stall for time.
Suddenly remembering the scars Merle had told her about, Hitomi hesitantly questioned, "Van? Can I see your back?"
Without a word, he rolled over, providing Hitomi with a full view of his backside. They were there, deep marks in his tanned skin. She trailed her finger around them, causing him to flinch. Hitomi grew alarmed and sat up slightly. "I'm sorry! Did that hurt?"
Van shook his head, his words muffled by the pillow. "No. It's just that I'm not used to anyone but doctors touching them."
Relaxing, Hitomi slid back down on the bed. "Well, I think they're beautiful."
" 'Beautiful'?" Van repeated ruefully, staring at the wall as Hitomi continued to trace the scars. She sighed blissfully as she leaned against him. "Uh-huh. They remind me of angel wings."
A hollow sound erupted from Van's throat, and Hitomi struggled to recognize what it was until she realized he was laughing. But it wasn't the carefree chuckles that she relished in every time; no, this was cold, grating, and self-deprecating. "I'm not an angel. Far from it. And they're not beautiful. They're ugly. I'm ugly."
"No! You're not!" Hitomi shouted in shock as Van slid his feet off the bed, still not facing her. "Yeah, I am. Truth is, if not for my brother Folken, I wouldn't have them. I'd be dead. But because of me, my brother's dead. And my parents are dead."
Hitomi reached out for him, but he stood up and slammed the palm of his hand against the wall. "Don't you get it! They're dead! And I killed them! Oh god I killed them!"
Jumping off the bed, Hitomi clung to him, yelling, "Van, Van, what are you saying?!"
"My...my best friend at the time...Dilandau....he gave me them...the matches...and I...then the house...so hot," Van finally sobbed, collapsing to the ground. Hitomi couldn't help but gasp, but tried to hide it as Van turned towards her, grabbing her shoulders as he continued, "I've been such a coward. I've been telling myself for the last couple of years that it was an accident, but...but why? Why did they die and I live?"
Wincing at the pain of Van's fingernails digging into her skin was the last thing Hitomi wanted to do, but Van noticed it and quickly dropped his arms to the sides, his eyes downcast as he stood up. "I cause suffering to all those I get close too. My parents. My brother. And now you, Hitomi, the only woman I've ever loved."
Haphazardly redressing, Van then looked at the glistening tears in Hitomi's, and smiled dispiritedly. "You don't deserve this."
"Are you saying I don't deserve you?" Hitomi cried, struggling to grab his hand. "Answer me! Do you think I don't deserve you?!"
Opening the door solemnly, Van replied coldly, "No, Hitomi. You just don't deserve to be hurt by me."