The Tale of a Warrior Maid
Chapter 11
Dernhelm sat her down by the roaring fire and settled himself beside her. "Now tell me what this assignment is,"
"He wants me to go marry. and then kill the Emperor. He says that since I'm the only women under his command, that I'm our only hope. I. I just don't think I could do that. Radaghast was right; I'm just a silly little girl with a couple of knives."
"Why did you come to Gondor? Why did you join the army in the first place? I know you heard the message and figured you could do it, but what made you really want to come even though your master said not to?" Dernhelm asked.
"I guess I wanted to prove myself. But what the point now, everyone I've met already thinks I can fight as well as any man. There's nothing more for me to prove. Éowyn did that years ago when she killed the witch king's beast. Women don't need to show you men anything. I wanted to be the one who liberated them, but I don't have to now. I may as well just go home."
"Just because everyone is okay with your being here doesn't mean you have nothing to prove. I am a Gondorien man of noble blood, but that doesn't mean every one thinks I can lead a troop in battle. My father wouldn't even trust me to care for my mother's cat. There are still people in this camp who will have problems with your being here. Go to the Haradwaith, prove your valor to them, to Radaghast. Besides, even if everyone thought you were the greatest archer that doesn't mean you should never shot another arrow." Dernhelm insisted. "I think you can do this, Elessar thinks you can do this and even Éomer thinks you can. You underestimate yourself Kesteral, don't."
"How do you know so much about women, most men wouldn't do what you just did? Promise me you'll be here when... if I return."
"I'll talk to the Kings; maybe they will allow me to travel with you." Dernhelm consoled her. "As for how I knew what to do. My mother rarely paid attention to me; my father was always busy, so I spent most of my childhood under the care of my grandmother. She taught me how to love a woman.
"To love a woman or to talk to a woman?" Kesteral asked quietly.
"You cannot communicate successfully to an upset lady without at first loving her," He blushed "When I first saw you in the supply tent, I thought I was dreaming, I thought I saw one of the miair. A strong willed, and yet a tender lady. Someone I could talk to, trust and love. Not a silly love, a deep everlasting love. I'm sorry I shouldn't be telling you this."
"No, no go on when I first saw you I felt the same. It's almost as though I was greeting a long lost brother. You weren't a stranger to me, that's why I asked if you would wait for me, that's one of the reasons I find the king's request so hard to fill. If I do marry the emperor then I can not marry again. I know we just met, but I feel as if I've known you forever," wept Kesteral as she grasped his hand. "The register warned me this would happen."
"It's okay, when this whole war is over I will wed you, whether or not the Valar see it fit. I will not let you sacrifice your love like this. That is unless you don't want to?"
"I do, I do want to. I'm just not sure. It's so sudden, every thing is happening so quickly, I need to. to lie down. I have to go.. I think my answer is yes, but I'm not sure. I'll tell you tomorrow," Kesteral cried out as she let his hand fall and stepped away. She walked back to her tent and left a very confused, heart broken man sitting by the fire.
Dernhelm sat her down by the roaring fire and settled himself beside her. "Now tell me what this assignment is,"
"He wants me to go marry. and then kill the Emperor. He says that since I'm the only women under his command, that I'm our only hope. I. I just don't think I could do that. Radaghast was right; I'm just a silly little girl with a couple of knives."
"Why did you come to Gondor? Why did you join the army in the first place? I know you heard the message and figured you could do it, but what made you really want to come even though your master said not to?" Dernhelm asked.
"I guess I wanted to prove myself. But what the point now, everyone I've met already thinks I can fight as well as any man. There's nothing more for me to prove. Éowyn did that years ago when she killed the witch king's beast. Women don't need to show you men anything. I wanted to be the one who liberated them, but I don't have to now. I may as well just go home."
"Just because everyone is okay with your being here doesn't mean you have nothing to prove. I am a Gondorien man of noble blood, but that doesn't mean every one thinks I can lead a troop in battle. My father wouldn't even trust me to care for my mother's cat. There are still people in this camp who will have problems with your being here. Go to the Haradwaith, prove your valor to them, to Radaghast. Besides, even if everyone thought you were the greatest archer that doesn't mean you should never shot another arrow." Dernhelm insisted. "I think you can do this, Elessar thinks you can do this and even Éomer thinks you can. You underestimate yourself Kesteral, don't."
"How do you know so much about women, most men wouldn't do what you just did? Promise me you'll be here when... if I return."
"I'll talk to the Kings; maybe they will allow me to travel with you." Dernhelm consoled her. "As for how I knew what to do. My mother rarely paid attention to me; my father was always busy, so I spent most of my childhood under the care of my grandmother. She taught me how to love a woman.
"To love a woman or to talk to a woman?" Kesteral asked quietly.
"You cannot communicate successfully to an upset lady without at first loving her," He blushed "When I first saw you in the supply tent, I thought I was dreaming, I thought I saw one of the miair. A strong willed, and yet a tender lady. Someone I could talk to, trust and love. Not a silly love, a deep everlasting love. I'm sorry I shouldn't be telling you this."
"No, no go on when I first saw you I felt the same. It's almost as though I was greeting a long lost brother. You weren't a stranger to me, that's why I asked if you would wait for me, that's one of the reasons I find the king's request so hard to fill. If I do marry the emperor then I can not marry again. I know we just met, but I feel as if I've known you forever," wept Kesteral as she grasped his hand. "The register warned me this would happen."
"It's okay, when this whole war is over I will wed you, whether or not the Valar see it fit. I will not let you sacrifice your love like this. That is unless you don't want to?"
"I do, I do want to. I'm just not sure. It's so sudden, every thing is happening so quickly, I need to. to lie down. I have to go.. I think my answer is yes, but I'm not sure. I'll tell you tomorrow," Kesteral cried out as she let his hand fall and stepped away. She walked back to her tent and left a very confused, heart broken man sitting by the fire.