FINDING PEACE
By: The Madhatter
Chapter 4 (out of 6): Support
See first chapter for details.
A/N: Once again, the reviews are extremely uplifting and helpful! Thanks to all those that took the time to review! It really means a great deal, especially since this is my first CSI fic. I have one piece of bad news. I don't know when I'll be able to post the next chapter after this. My teachers have decided to pile a bunch of tests and projects on us at the end of the year, so I'm rushing to finish them so I can get to writing the next chapter. Amazingly enough, I have the last chapter written, but not the second to last. hmm. I need some time management skills. :P Thanks for sticking with me you guys. It's almost done. Without further ado.
Catherine Willows awoke feeling refreshed and energized. The weight of guilt, the remorse was all gone. Glancing out the window, the sun was out, shining bright on the crazy town of Las Vegas, without a cloud in sight. She smiled. It was going to be a good day today.
"Hey, baby."
"Morning, Mom," Lindsey replied with a mouth full of cereal. Swallowing before continuing, she asked, "How was your day yesterday? You weren't alone were you?"
Catherine couldn't help but smile at the concern of such a young child. "Shouldn't I be the one worrying over you, not the other way around?"
Lindsey laughed. "You're not answering the question, Mom."
Catherine cocked her head to the side, eyebrow raised. When did her daughter get so observant? "Okay, okay. You got me. My day was fine and no, I wasn't alone. Nick came by and we talked a bit."
"What'd you talk about?"
"Greg. He just came to tell me how he was doing and cheered me up a bit." It was a half-truth, but it would have to do. If Lindsey found out what really happened. she didn't want to think about how her daughter would react.
"Cheered you up? Why, were you sad?"
"Lindsey, you better go for school. The bus is waiting for you," Catherine said, grateful for the big yellow bus for once. "We'll talk later, okay?"
Her daughter looked up at her suspiciously. "Okay. see you later, Mom. Love you."
"Love you, too."
Once Lindsey clambered up the steps of the bus and sat down with her best friend, Catherine closed the door and looked around her house. It was a mess. Lately, she hadn't had time to clean up her house because work took up most of her time. That, and she had been completely drained of all energy. The weight of Eddie's death was finally settling in like a boulder. Nick and Warrick helped get rid of some of the weight, but not all of it. She wasn't completely sure that it would ever go away.
Sighing, she made her way to the kitchen to start wiping down the counters. They had certainly seen better days. She took out the cleaning solution and found it empty. How did that empty so fast? She wondered. Then she remembered-she used it up last time and made a note to go get some more, but never had the time.
"Why me?" she questioned the empty bottle. Then, picking up her keys and purse, she headed out to her car. Might as well go pick up a few groceries on my way, she thought. Thankfully, Albertson's was nearby and it only took her five minutes to get there.
Glancing down the aisles, she spotted the cleaning supplies and headed down it. Something, or rather someone, caught her eye.
"Sara?"
"Catherine?
"What are you doing here?" they asked each other in unison.
They laughed. Then, Catherine asked a simple question, "What are you doing up so early? I thought you'd be asleep. You know, taking advantage of a slow day."
Sara sighed. "Yeah, but I really needed to clean my apartment. It's horrible. I can't stand it. What about you? What're you doing here?"
"Same as you. My house is a disaster area."
"Lindsey?"
"Partly. She's pretty good at cleaning up most of her things. I'm the one slacking off."
Sara chuckled. "Yeah, I know how that is."
Catherine looked down at the bottle Sara was holding and noticed the white bandage wrap around her hand. "Sara, what happened to your hand?"
She reflexively hid it from view by pulling the sleeve over it. "Um, nothing. I, uh, just hurt it in the lab. I. I, uh, broke a beaker and it cut me."
"What really happened?"
She sighed again. "I hurt it when the lab exploded. I heard what happened, too."
Catherine looked down at the bottle she was holding and seemed very interested in it. "Yeah, it was me. I'm sorry for what I did to your hand. If I hadn't been so careless, if I hadn't been so stupid none of this wouldn't have happened!"
Sara placed her uninjured hand on the older woman's shoulder. "Cath, you've been through a lot. I understand. It wasn't your fault. Besides," she held up her bandaged hand, "this isn't serious. Just a few stitches, nothing life-threatening."
"I guess. I still feel responsible."
"I'm the one who should feel responsible, Catherine." Sara gazed into her blue eyes. "I should be the one responsible. I could've caught Eddie's killer. I could've had the bastard behind bars and cause you less grief. It was my fault. I was working the case. and I blew it. I'm so sorry."
Catherine offered a small smile and shook her head. "No, you tried, Sara. I know you. You won't give up. I was. overreacting, I guess. There wasn't enough evidence to convict anybody."
"I still feel responsible though. Maybe. maybe if I found the murderer, you wouldn't be going through this."
"It doesn't matter. Eddie is dead; nothing can change that fact. Yes, I'm still grieving, but not as much. It wasn't your fault," Catherine said, surprised at how she was using the words Warrick and Nick used just a couple days ago. "Sara, believe me, you're not responsible for anything. You did what you could to the best of your abilities. You can't do any more than that."
"You know, you almost sound like Grissom."
"Do I now? I think he's starting to rub off on me. I'm flattered." Catherine grinned. But Sara, don't blame yourself. You didn't cause me more grief than I was already going through."
"Thanks, Catherine." Sara smiled.
"No, thank you, Sara."
They exchanged goodbyes and parted ways. Sara went to the frozen section and Catherine headed for the checkout stand. Once she paid for the bottle of cleaning solution, she headed to her car, feeling even lighter than this morning. Maybe all she needed was the support of her friends. She didn't have to go through her problems alone, they would be here for her-every single one of them: Warrick, Nick, Sara. and finally, Grissom. Catherine smiled. Who could ask for more?
By: The Madhatter
Chapter 4 (out of 6): Support
See first chapter for details.
A/N: Once again, the reviews are extremely uplifting and helpful! Thanks to all those that took the time to review! It really means a great deal, especially since this is my first CSI fic. I have one piece of bad news. I don't know when I'll be able to post the next chapter after this. My teachers have decided to pile a bunch of tests and projects on us at the end of the year, so I'm rushing to finish them so I can get to writing the next chapter. Amazingly enough, I have the last chapter written, but not the second to last. hmm. I need some time management skills. :P Thanks for sticking with me you guys. It's almost done. Without further ado.
Catherine Willows awoke feeling refreshed and energized. The weight of guilt, the remorse was all gone. Glancing out the window, the sun was out, shining bright on the crazy town of Las Vegas, without a cloud in sight. She smiled. It was going to be a good day today.
"Hey, baby."
"Morning, Mom," Lindsey replied with a mouth full of cereal. Swallowing before continuing, she asked, "How was your day yesterday? You weren't alone were you?"
Catherine couldn't help but smile at the concern of such a young child. "Shouldn't I be the one worrying over you, not the other way around?"
Lindsey laughed. "You're not answering the question, Mom."
Catherine cocked her head to the side, eyebrow raised. When did her daughter get so observant? "Okay, okay. You got me. My day was fine and no, I wasn't alone. Nick came by and we talked a bit."
"What'd you talk about?"
"Greg. He just came to tell me how he was doing and cheered me up a bit." It was a half-truth, but it would have to do. If Lindsey found out what really happened. she didn't want to think about how her daughter would react.
"Cheered you up? Why, were you sad?"
"Lindsey, you better go for school. The bus is waiting for you," Catherine said, grateful for the big yellow bus for once. "We'll talk later, okay?"
Her daughter looked up at her suspiciously. "Okay. see you later, Mom. Love you."
"Love you, too."
Once Lindsey clambered up the steps of the bus and sat down with her best friend, Catherine closed the door and looked around her house. It was a mess. Lately, she hadn't had time to clean up her house because work took up most of her time. That, and she had been completely drained of all energy. The weight of Eddie's death was finally settling in like a boulder. Nick and Warrick helped get rid of some of the weight, but not all of it. She wasn't completely sure that it would ever go away.
Sighing, she made her way to the kitchen to start wiping down the counters. They had certainly seen better days. She took out the cleaning solution and found it empty. How did that empty so fast? She wondered. Then she remembered-she used it up last time and made a note to go get some more, but never had the time.
"Why me?" she questioned the empty bottle. Then, picking up her keys and purse, she headed out to her car. Might as well go pick up a few groceries on my way, she thought. Thankfully, Albertson's was nearby and it only took her five minutes to get there.
Glancing down the aisles, she spotted the cleaning supplies and headed down it. Something, or rather someone, caught her eye.
"Sara?"
"Catherine?
"What are you doing here?" they asked each other in unison.
They laughed. Then, Catherine asked a simple question, "What are you doing up so early? I thought you'd be asleep. You know, taking advantage of a slow day."
Sara sighed. "Yeah, but I really needed to clean my apartment. It's horrible. I can't stand it. What about you? What're you doing here?"
"Same as you. My house is a disaster area."
"Lindsey?"
"Partly. She's pretty good at cleaning up most of her things. I'm the one slacking off."
Sara chuckled. "Yeah, I know how that is."
Catherine looked down at the bottle Sara was holding and noticed the white bandage wrap around her hand. "Sara, what happened to your hand?"
She reflexively hid it from view by pulling the sleeve over it. "Um, nothing. I, uh, just hurt it in the lab. I. I, uh, broke a beaker and it cut me."
"What really happened?"
She sighed again. "I hurt it when the lab exploded. I heard what happened, too."
Catherine looked down at the bottle she was holding and seemed very interested in it. "Yeah, it was me. I'm sorry for what I did to your hand. If I hadn't been so careless, if I hadn't been so stupid none of this wouldn't have happened!"
Sara placed her uninjured hand on the older woman's shoulder. "Cath, you've been through a lot. I understand. It wasn't your fault. Besides," she held up her bandaged hand, "this isn't serious. Just a few stitches, nothing life-threatening."
"I guess. I still feel responsible."
"I'm the one who should feel responsible, Catherine." Sara gazed into her blue eyes. "I should be the one responsible. I could've caught Eddie's killer. I could've had the bastard behind bars and cause you less grief. It was my fault. I was working the case. and I blew it. I'm so sorry."
Catherine offered a small smile and shook her head. "No, you tried, Sara. I know you. You won't give up. I was. overreacting, I guess. There wasn't enough evidence to convict anybody."
"I still feel responsible though. Maybe. maybe if I found the murderer, you wouldn't be going through this."
"It doesn't matter. Eddie is dead; nothing can change that fact. Yes, I'm still grieving, but not as much. It wasn't your fault," Catherine said, surprised at how she was using the words Warrick and Nick used just a couple days ago. "Sara, believe me, you're not responsible for anything. You did what you could to the best of your abilities. You can't do any more than that."
"You know, you almost sound like Grissom."
"Do I now? I think he's starting to rub off on me. I'm flattered." Catherine grinned. But Sara, don't blame yourself. You didn't cause me more grief than I was already going through."
"Thanks, Catherine." Sara smiled.
"No, thank you, Sara."
They exchanged goodbyes and parted ways. Sara went to the frozen section and Catherine headed for the checkout stand. Once she paid for the bottle of cleaning solution, she headed to her car, feeling even lighter than this morning. Maybe all she needed was the support of her friends. She didn't have to go through her problems alone, they would be here for her-every single one of them: Warrick, Nick, Sara. and finally, Grissom. Catherine smiled. Who could ask for more?