NOTES: Let me say thank you to all those who reviewed this. I love all the reviews and am enjoying writing this story.

I will finish this fic. I am a firm believer in finishing a story once you started posting it. Beside you guys are giving me such great reviews.

It was several hours later when Scott noticed that Buffy hadn't come for the plate he had saved for her. After warming it up in the microwave he made his way back to the recreation room. He heard her whimpering.

"Giles. I'm sorry. Please don't hate me. I'm so sorry." She was tossing and turning on the couch. Her cries were becoming screams.

"Willow! Xander! Giles!"

She shot up from her position on the couch. She was shaking fiercely. Scott placed the plate on the table and move to her side.

"Buffy?"

Scott called to her before taking a seat beside her. At first she was still caught up in the reminiscence of the dream, but Scott's voice and touch brought her around. She felt him pulling her into his embrace. She turned her head into him and began to cry as she continued to shake.

"It's alright Buffy. It was only a dream. Want to tell me about?" Not trusting her voice she shook her head no. "Alright. You don't have to. We'll just sit here."

His shirt was damp from Buffy's tears but he didn't mind. He wanted to take this pain she was carrying away. He could feel her body slowly stop shaking and her tears soon went dry.

"You need to talk to them Kiwi. You can't keep this up. You'll feel better if you do."

"I can't Scott. I can't bear to see their hated looks. I can't talk to them."

"Buffy they need to know you're alright."

"You're right but how can I without talking to them directly. I don't think I can express everything I want in a letter. I wouldn't be able to mail it from here because I don't want them to know where I am yet. A phone call is definitely out. I don't have the nerve to talk to them."

"We'll think of something."

Scott continued to hold her tightly offering her comfort. Buffy sniffled but the silenced remained. Scott soon noticed that her breathing had slowed. He looked down and saw that she was asleep, tired from her emotional distress and the day's activity. He sat that there holding her. Content to let his little cousin get hopefully restful sleep, he stretched out and made himself comfortable. That was how Jean and Logan found them half an hour later. Jean smiled at how cute the two of them looked snuggled up together. She grabbed a blanket and covered them both.

It had been one month since anyone had seen Buffy. Xander, Willow, Oz, and even Cordelia had taken up Buffy's nightly patrols together. Giles once he had gotten out of the hospital had immediately begun looking for Buffy. He made calls to friends and asked them to be on the lookout for her. The first place he had checked was LA. Hoping that maybe she had gone to her father's place. Giles had found out that Hank was out of the country. He had tried several other places and got the same result. He was just returning from Arizona where one of his friends thought she saw her there. That had turned out to be a bust. The woman was several inches taller than Buffy and not quite as skinny. He entered the apartment dropping the bags at the door. He shuffled through his mail when he saw the package that simply said his name. Instantly he knew whom it was from. He quickly tore off the brown wrapping. Inside were a folded piece of paper and a VCR tape. He unfolded the paper to read it.

Giles

I'm glad you're okay. First of all I'm all right. I'm nowhere near Sunnydale and this was delivered via a special friend. This video should explain almost everything. Please gather the gang and mom together and watch it at Mom's since you refuse to join the twentieth century and buy a VCR.

Your Slayer,

BUFFY

Twenty minutes later Willow, Xander, Cordelia, and Giles arrived at Buffy's house. They took a seat in front of the TV while Joyce set everything up. She turned it on. At first there was nothing but static but then it changed to Buffy standing and twisting her fingers nervously. The first thing Giles noticed was that she looked ten pounds skinner, which was weight she couldn't afford to lose.

"Hi everybody. You can all see that I'm fine. I wanted to say that I'm sorry for running away. It's another mistake to add to my growing list. You all are probably wandering why I left. I left because I believe that you all would be much better off without me screwing up your lives. I thought if I stayed away you would all forget about me in time. Everything that happened, happened because of me. The whole entire thing was my fault. Because of me Giles you not only lost Jenny once but twice. If I had staked Angelus that night after we destroyed the Judge she would still be alive and you wouldn't have had to been put through that torture. You should all hate me because right now I pretty much hate myself. I would understand if you guys never wanted to see me again."

Tears were now flowing freely down her face. Giles hadn't realized he was crying. He couldn't believe Buffy blamed herself for what happened. He had never blamed her for Jenny's death. He couldn't because it wasn't her fault. The only one to blame was Angelus. He took off his glasses and wiped at his tear-streaked face. After cleaning them with his handkerchief he replaced them. He looked at the others to see them too wiping tears from their eyes. They returned their attention to the screen as Buffy began to speak again sniffing as she spoke.

"Mom I know that being a parent doesn't come with a handbook and I know finding out that I was the slayer was a shock, but what you did and said hurt me more than you can ever know. In my head I know you didn't mean what you said, but my heart tells me something different."

She bent down and when she appeared again with tissues. She was trying to get herself under control.

"I love you all and I know that my life has been a better one with you all in it. I'm not quite ready to return home yet. Still have too many things I have to get straightened out first. I hope that when I finally do come home that you all will be there, but like I said before if you don't want to see me again I'll understand. Take care of yourselves."

Buffy walked toward the camera and the tape ended. Everyone sat in silence. No one really knew what to say. One thing Giles knew was he was determined now more than ever to find Buffy.

Buffy had spent the remainder of her day in her room. After giving the video tape to Kurt Wagner, another blue skinned demon-looking X-man, whose powers were to teleport from one place to another, she couldn't stand to be seen by anyone. So she stayed in her room. She cried for quite some time until she fell asleep. Scott had checked in on her several times only to find her still asleep. He was worried about her. He wasn't sure what to do for her. When Buffy awoke she was feeling a little better. She felt slightly rested but was still carrying so much baggage. She needed to think and needed to do that someplace else. Just like she would when she wanted to leave from home she went out the window. Flipping out the window she landed softly on her feet. She had seen a good thinking spot when she had first been shown around. A clearing that over looked the water but was hidden by trees and bushes. The night was clear which gave her an excellent view of the stars. She took a seat on the ground and stared off at the lapping water. The events that led to her leaving played in her head. She cried. She cried not for herself but for her friends, for Ms. Calendar, and for Kendra. There would be no tears for her because she truly believed she deserved whatever punishment she was given. After sitting for an hour she got the feeling she wasn't alone.

"I know your there Logan. You might as well show yourself."

She heard the rustle of the bushes and trees. Several seconds later Logan appeared.

"You got Scott worried about you. You okay Darlin? You want ta talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Not really to talking about it or you're not really okay?"

"Both."

They both sat in silence for a moment. He pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to her. She took it wiping her eyes.

"Thanks."

"Thank Scott. It's one of his. He gave it to me before I came to find you."

"You know if you ever want to talk about it you can come to me, or if you need a release I'll spar with you anytime."

She just nodded her head. The sound of Buffy's stomach growling interrupted the quietness.

"What say we head into the kitchen and see what we can find to eat? There might be some of Gumbo's Creole left."

"That sounds good." She got up from her spot and joined Logan. "Logan thanks for not pushing."

"I know how it can be darlin. How did you know I was out there?"

He had used his usual stealth so she shouldn't have detected him.

"I could smelt those cigars you smoke in the air. You're usually the only one that smokes them."

He had to laugh at that which also got Buffy laughing.

"Come on before they send a search party out."

Buffy had been a little down for the last couple of days. It had been two weeks since she had sent the video and she was feeling homesick. She had been spending more time in the danger room fighting. At night she would go to bed and sleep for an hour before she woke from one her nightmares. Scott noticed and decided she needed some cheering up. Buffy was sitting in the entertainment room when Scott entered.

"Hey Scottie." Scott approached her.

"Come with me." Scott pulled her along.

"Scott? Where are you taking me?"

"It's a surprise."

Scott wouldn't tell Buffy where he was taking her. Buffy was actually glad for the change in scenery. Scott always knew when she wasn't feeling like herself. They had been on the road for twenty minutes when Buffy saw where they were stopping at. A huge smile lit her face.

"We're going to the carnival?"

"Yup just like when we were younger. I wanted to take you ice skating but the rink was closed so I thought this was the next best thing."

"Thank you Scottie."

She shrieked and pulled him along not sure what she wanted to go on first. Her mood had gone from melancholy to ecstatic in a matter of minutes.

Hoped you liked it. Please READ & REVIEW. Since you guys are so good at that here's a hint at what the next chapter will be about.

Scott and Buffy run into some trouble at the fair. An old enemy of the X-men takes an interest in Buffy.