Summary: Jack goes out to a bar full of lonely (and kooky) people who will (probably) sound very familiar.
Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate or Billy Joel. In fact, I own no people whatsoever. How depressing.
Jack sat at the classic-styled bar, a wooden bar bent in a half-circle and stuck to a wall, surrounding a mirror with bottles of various alcohols on shelves. Jack O'Neill sat on a barstool just about at the midpoint, where the bar was bent farthest from the wall, casually talking to a very depressed looking man. But hey, he had a short break, and he certainly wasn't just going to stay on base and listen to Daniel go on about…Sumeria or whatnot. Besides, this was a very nice bar; they even had a piano man playing. Of course, Jack couldn't help but notice this guy seemed to know a bit too much about people. Freaky.
"And they're talkin' to Davy, whose still in the navy, and probably will be for life! Oh la-la-la-dee-dee-da, la-la-dee-dee-da-da-"
"Hey, hey, waitaminute! First of all, my name is JACK. J-A-C-K: Jack. So stop calling me Davy, It really freaks me out. And I'm in the Air Force, there's a big difference between the Air Force and the Navy you know… and for another thing, you make it sound like its bad to be in the Military! I mean, sure, if I were a Private all my life in the army, and at 83 years old I was sent off to war and got blown up…now that would suck, but see, I'm a Colonel, note the funky silver wings, yah. I have a really cool job, and a whole bunch of friends, and I save the wor-*cough* USA on a daily basis!"
"He's lost his mind, brainwashed by the government" whispers a drunken man to the waitress.
"Hey, I am so not brainwashed! I've been brainwashed enough times to know when I'm being brainwashed! Besides what are you all doing that's so great, at least I get some excitement in my life in the Air force!"
"But don't you just work in that mountain?" asks another man (who Jack thought seemed to know waay too much about him already)
"Yeah, why?" he replied casually
"What could you possibly be doing inside a mountain that's so great?" the other man pressed
"Fight aliens. Save the world. Y'know."
Everyone in the room breaks out laughing
"The truth is out there" Jack says, in his mock-Mulder voice
"Yeah, whatever Davy!" The table laughs
"AARRGG!! ITS JACK!!" He says, eyes going wide, completely fed up, and runs from the bar screaming
"Psycho" the drunken man mutters. Everyone nods, and cues the piano man to continue.
"…La-la-la-la-dee-dee-da!-la-da-dee-dee-da-da-dum!"