"So let me get this straight. You did this for us?" Cory asked
Topanga. It was the first time they'd talked for more than five minutes,
and conversation was really flowing.
"Yes," Topanga replied. "I did it for you two." Cory was still confused. "Did you think that maybe that's not what I wanted? Did you think that maybe leaving hurt me more than what you thought?" he asked her impatiently.
"Cory, don't talk about pain. Do you even know how hard it was for me to leave? That's not what I wanted either, but I know it's what we all want now." Topanga told him.
"But why'd you have to go to Seattle?" Cory asked. They were both pretty much crying, not because they loved each other but because it reminded them of how dead their love was.
"I wanted to get away from you as far as I possibly could so I wouldn't be reminded of us," Topanga replied. "And I thought it would hurt me, but it didn't." Topanga started walking away. "Don't argue with me, Cory," she said. "You know what I did was right." She turned around and left.
And you know what? Cory wasn't sorry at all. Morgan stared at them with intentional sympathy. "Sorry," she said when he came nearer to Shawn and Angela and of course, Morgan.
"It's okay," he replied, putting his arm around her. "I really don't care." He smiled at her. "Maybe we can catch the next bus soon."
As they rode the long bus ride home, all Cory thought about was Topanga and Morgan. For one thing, Morgan was another Topanga, but better. He had a feeling that if he had to choose, he would choose Morgan. Morgan wouldn't just leave like that and not even say anything. Even though Topanga was right and she had done the right thing, it still seemed mean and not very thoughtful and inconsiderate. It WAS mean and inconsiderate.
He was tired of his thoughts. They weren't helping him any. They were supposed to tell him whether or not he loved Morgan. But they weren't, they were just there. They weren't helping him accomplish anything but loneliness, impatience, and confusion. He was totally miserable; unlike he'd ever been when he was with Morgan.
He thought of what would happen if the things he went through with Topanga he had to go through with Morgan. Would she react like Topanga? He sincerely didn't think so. Morgan had a noticed amount of sophistication that Cory had never seen before. He didn't know how to explain it. If he'd ever kissed Lauren and had it not meant anything when he was going out with Morgan, would she have acted like Topanga? Morgan seemed very insightful, like she would have been able to tell if it meant something or not.
He turned to her. "Morgan?" he asked. She turned around to face him. "Do you know the difference between kissing someone and having it meaning something and kissing someone and having it NOT mean anything?"
"Yeah," she said. "If you really, really love somebody, and you kiss someone else, it doesn't mean anything because you really, really love that person and that's all that matters. Especially if the person you kissed kisses you and you don't pull away, it doesn't mean you don't love the person you originally loved. Am I making since?" she asked. He nodded. "You thinking about Topanga?" she asked again. He kind of nodded and shrugged at the same time. He was, but Topanga was only part of it.
"Listen," she told him. "I know how you feel. It'll hurt for like, a really long time. Then it'll go away. Then it'll hurt again. And then it will go away. And before you have a chance to hurt again, you don't care anymore. It's like you can't hurt anymore because all that pain, all that suffering, you've already felt it all and you can't feel it anymore." She smiled at him. "It doesn't make much since, but trust me. It's true."
Meanwhile, Shawn and Angela were sitting in the two-person bus seat next to them, an aisle apart. Because of this aisle, Cory nor Morgan could hear what Shawn and Angela were saying. But Shawn and Angela could hear Morgan and Cory's conversation.
"Do you think we should say something?" Angela asked Shawn. "What do you mean?" he asked. "Well, I don't know. I just think Cory's starting a relationship he shouldn't. Don't you think he should wait?" Angela asked.
"No," Shawn said, still watching them. "I think that Cory needs Morgan a lot more than we think." He told Angela. "Why?" she asked. "Cory just lost Topanga. Cory loves Topanga a lot, but he doesn't anymore ever since Morgan came here and Topanga left. See, Cory has always loved Topanga. Always. Even when Morgan first came, he still loved Topanga. And then she left. No note, no explanation, no nothing except a phone call from her office saying she was on a business trip and it must've slipped her mind to mention anything. Then Morgan came back and Cory felt like - like instead of Morgan coming back, it was like Topanga had come back." Shawn explained. "I know you probably don't understand it, because I don't. But - I guess these things just happen." He sighed.
Angela didn't understand exactly, but she understood most of it. The understood part being, of course, that Cory loved Topanga and now Cory loves Morgan because Topanga left. The part she didn't get though was the part when it was like Topanga coming back. Morgan was very original.
"This whole love thing isn't making any sense," Angela exclaimed. "Yeah, I know," Shawn agreed. "I just don't get it. I mean, do they love each other, or not?" he asked her.
"Shawn, they love each other more than anything. Morgan won't admit it, but I know she does. It's just; I don't know how to get her to admit it. I'm sure they can tell that they love each other, but neither of them will admit it. That's what's so frustrating!" Angela was so impatient about this whole thing.
Meanwhile, Cory was back to thinking. His thoughts had answered the only question that'd be on his mind for awhile - does he love Morgan?
His thoughts, of course, aren't very accurate, as you very well know. Thoughts can think anything you want them to. They can give you any serene amount of confidence. She is gorgeous, smart, and very talented at what she does. Why else would she have left for L.A.?
But then why did she come back. It wasn't a question. Why, if she could have had a great life in L.A. and been very successful, did she come back?
He pushed the thoughts to the back of his head. They were home, anyway. He didn't need to think about all this confusion. He needed to concentrate on absolutely nothing.
The next day, he couldn't help but have the need to talk to Shawn about it. So he did, not knowing that what Shawn had to say could help him his entire life.
Shawn, Cory, and Angela decided to meet at the Digital Hang Out. They were still going there even though everyone had to admit their favorite place was The New York Café. And see, if it weren't for Morgan, none of them ever would have gone there and they probably would have never tasted the food there and probably never would have fallen in love with the place.
"Do you love Morgan?" Shawn asked the minute they sat down. Most everyone who went there was either at school or at work, so they were all alone in there, with exception of Mindy, who worked at Digital Hang Out.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Cory asked him. "Just what I said. Do you love her?" Shawn asked again, annoyed with his friend's stupidity.
"It doesn't matter," Cory said. Shawn looked at him. The look on his face said plainly come on.
"Sure it does. You need to get in touch with your inner child and then you'll get rid of your verbal inability to express your emotions." Angela reminded him. "Morgan explained it to me."
Morgan, Morgan, Morgan, Cory thought. Is all they think about Morgan? I thought today would be different. Can't we talk about something else? I don't really want to be reminded of the girl who will never give me more than just a smile or a hug or something.
At Morgan's apartment, all she could think about was the music swirling around her. She loved Coldplay, absolutely loved them. Her latest favorite, Clocks, was going around in her mind over and over again. It was a dreamy song that she just adored. It was a good thinking song - she could think about whatever she wanted and still be accompanied by the dreamy lyrics.
Still, as the song slowed to an end, she pressed repeat and flopped down on her bed. She was tired of being accompanied by only herself. She wanted social activity. But then again, she was afraid she'd run into Cory. Lately, he'd been avoiding her for some strange reason. What had she done? What had she said?
She remembered she'd forgotten to check her messages when she saw the flashing "3" on her answering machine. She smiled. Three messages? That was three more than she usually had.
The first one was from a guy at her office that wanted to go out with her. She deleted it and decided to pretend she hadn't gotten the message. She hated all guys that worked in a fashion agency. Who does that? But then again, he was just the UPS guy who happened to walk into her office often with "packages", which were hardly ever actual packages.
The second one was from her landlord. This one really got to her. It explained that she hadn't been paying her rent and if she continued this, they'd have to evict her from her apartment and replace her with customers who cared about responsibility.
The last was from her boss. Unfortunately, they were cutting her salary 2/3. She would only get one-third of her usual salary. This was so unfair, until she realized, that two-thirds of her salary went to the rent money. If she didn't have that two thirds anymore, she'd be evicted.
She turned the boom box off and sighed. She got online and sent an email to her landlord. Then she picked up her suitcases and started folding her clothes. She'd have to leave, there was no way she could pay now.
What's a girl to do?
"Yes," Topanga replied. "I did it for you two." Cory was still confused. "Did you think that maybe that's not what I wanted? Did you think that maybe leaving hurt me more than what you thought?" he asked her impatiently.
"Cory, don't talk about pain. Do you even know how hard it was for me to leave? That's not what I wanted either, but I know it's what we all want now." Topanga told him.
"But why'd you have to go to Seattle?" Cory asked. They were both pretty much crying, not because they loved each other but because it reminded them of how dead their love was.
"I wanted to get away from you as far as I possibly could so I wouldn't be reminded of us," Topanga replied. "And I thought it would hurt me, but it didn't." Topanga started walking away. "Don't argue with me, Cory," she said. "You know what I did was right." She turned around and left.
And you know what? Cory wasn't sorry at all. Morgan stared at them with intentional sympathy. "Sorry," she said when he came nearer to Shawn and Angela and of course, Morgan.
"It's okay," he replied, putting his arm around her. "I really don't care." He smiled at her. "Maybe we can catch the next bus soon."
As they rode the long bus ride home, all Cory thought about was Topanga and Morgan. For one thing, Morgan was another Topanga, but better. He had a feeling that if he had to choose, he would choose Morgan. Morgan wouldn't just leave like that and not even say anything. Even though Topanga was right and she had done the right thing, it still seemed mean and not very thoughtful and inconsiderate. It WAS mean and inconsiderate.
He was tired of his thoughts. They weren't helping him any. They were supposed to tell him whether or not he loved Morgan. But they weren't, they were just there. They weren't helping him accomplish anything but loneliness, impatience, and confusion. He was totally miserable; unlike he'd ever been when he was with Morgan.
He thought of what would happen if the things he went through with Topanga he had to go through with Morgan. Would she react like Topanga? He sincerely didn't think so. Morgan had a noticed amount of sophistication that Cory had never seen before. He didn't know how to explain it. If he'd ever kissed Lauren and had it not meant anything when he was going out with Morgan, would she have acted like Topanga? Morgan seemed very insightful, like she would have been able to tell if it meant something or not.
He turned to her. "Morgan?" he asked. She turned around to face him. "Do you know the difference between kissing someone and having it meaning something and kissing someone and having it NOT mean anything?"
"Yeah," she said. "If you really, really love somebody, and you kiss someone else, it doesn't mean anything because you really, really love that person and that's all that matters. Especially if the person you kissed kisses you and you don't pull away, it doesn't mean you don't love the person you originally loved. Am I making since?" she asked. He nodded. "You thinking about Topanga?" she asked again. He kind of nodded and shrugged at the same time. He was, but Topanga was only part of it.
"Listen," she told him. "I know how you feel. It'll hurt for like, a really long time. Then it'll go away. Then it'll hurt again. And then it will go away. And before you have a chance to hurt again, you don't care anymore. It's like you can't hurt anymore because all that pain, all that suffering, you've already felt it all and you can't feel it anymore." She smiled at him. "It doesn't make much since, but trust me. It's true."
Meanwhile, Shawn and Angela were sitting in the two-person bus seat next to them, an aisle apart. Because of this aisle, Cory nor Morgan could hear what Shawn and Angela were saying. But Shawn and Angela could hear Morgan and Cory's conversation.
"Do you think we should say something?" Angela asked Shawn. "What do you mean?" he asked. "Well, I don't know. I just think Cory's starting a relationship he shouldn't. Don't you think he should wait?" Angela asked.
"No," Shawn said, still watching them. "I think that Cory needs Morgan a lot more than we think." He told Angela. "Why?" she asked. "Cory just lost Topanga. Cory loves Topanga a lot, but he doesn't anymore ever since Morgan came here and Topanga left. See, Cory has always loved Topanga. Always. Even when Morgan first came, he still loved Topanga. And then she left. No note, no explanation, no nothing except a phone call from her office saying she was on a business trip and it must've slipped her mind to mention anything. Then Morgan came back and Cory felt like - like instead of Morgan coming back, it was like Topanga had come back." Shawn explained. "I know you probably don't understand it, because I don't. But - I guess these things just happen." He sighed.
Angela didn't understand exactly, but she understood most of it. The understood part being, of course, that Cory loved Topanga and now Cory loves Morgan because Topanga left. The part she didn't get though was the part when it was like Topanga coming back. Morgan was very original.
"This whole love thing isn't making any sense," Angela exclaimed. "Yeah, I know," Shawn agreed. "I just don't get it. I mean, do they love each other, or not?" he asked her.
"Shawn, they love each other more than anything. Morgan won't admit it, but I know she does. It's just; I don't know how to get her to admit it. I'm sure they can tell that they love each other, but neither of them will admit it. That's what's so frustrating!" Angela was so impatient about this whole thing.
Meanwhile, Cory was back to thinking. His thoughts had answered the only question that'd be on his mind for awhile - does he love Morgan?
His thoughts, of course, aren't very accurate, as you very well know. Thoughts can think anything you want them to. They can give you any serene amount of confidence. She is gorgeous, smart, and very talented at what she does. Why else would she have left for L.A.?
But then why did she come back. It wasn't a question. Why, if she could have had a great life in L.A. and been very successful, did she come back?
He pushed the thoughts to the back of his head. They were home, anyway. He didn't need to think about all this confusion. He needed to concentrate on absolutely nothing.
The next day, he couldn't help but have the need to talk to Shawn about it. So he did, not knowing that what Shawn had to say could help him his entire life.
Shawn, Cory, and Angela decided to meet at the Digital Hang Out. They were still going there even though everyone had to admit their favorite place was The New York Café. And see, if it weren't for Morgan, none of them ever would have gone there and they probably would have never tasted the food there and probably never would have fallen in love with the place.
"Do you love Morgan?" Shawn asked the minute they sat down. Most everyone who went there was either at school or at work, so they were all alone in there, with exception of Mindy, who worked at Digital Hang Out.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Cory asked him. "Just what I said. Do you love her?" Shawn asked again, annoyed with his friend's stupidity.
"It doesn't matter," Cory said. Shawn looked at him. The look on his face said plainly come on.
"Sure it does. You need to get in touch with your inner child and then you'll get rid of your verbal inability to express your emotions." Angela reminded him. "Morgan explained it to me."
Morgan, Morgan, Morgan, Cory thought. Is all they think about Morgan? I thought today would be different. Can't we talk about something else? I don't really want to be reminded of the girl who will never give me more than just a smile or a hug or something.
At Morgan's apartment, all she could think about was the music swirling around her. She loved Coldplay, absolutely loved them. Her latest favorite, Clocks, was going around in her mind over and over again. It was a dreamy song that she just adored. It was a good thinking song - she could think about whatever she wanted and still be accompanied by the dreamy lyrics.
Still, as the song slowed to an end, she pressed repeat and flopped down on her bed. She was tired of being accompanied by only herself. She wanted social activity. But then again, she was afraid she'd run into Cory. Lately, he'd been avoiding her for some strange reason. What had she done? What had she said?
She remembered she'd forgotten to check her messages when she saw the flashing "3" on her answering machine. She smiled. Three messages? That was three more than she usually had.
The first one was from a guy at her office that wanted to go out with her. She deleted it and decided to pretend she hadn't gotten the message. She hated all guys that worked in a fashion agency. Who does that? But then again, he was just the UPS guy who happened to walk into her office often with "packages", which were hardly ever actual packages.
The second one was from her landlord. This one really got to her. It explained that she hadn't been paying her rent and if she continued this, they'd have to evict her from her apartment and replace her with customers who cared about responsibility.
The last was from her boss. Unfortunately, they were cutting her salary 2/3. She would only get one-third of her usual salary. This was so unfair, until she realized, that two-thirds of her salary went to the rent money. If she didn't have that two thirds anymore, she'd be evicted.
She turned the boom box off and sighed. She got online and sent an email to her landlord. Then she picked up her suitcases and started folding her clothes. She'd have to leave, there was no way she could pay now.
What's a girl to do?