Title: Shaant
Author: Annie
Rating: G
Timeline: Sometimes after "the Coup" but no real knowledge necessary. Just vague references. Anytime in Season One, I suppose.
Summary: "If she wasn't going to fight for love, then what were her grounds for wanting Vaughn in her life?" Sydney realizes some things are for secure, no matter what. S/V
Disclaimer: I seriously own nothing. Like seriously. You wouldn't believe.
Distribution: I'd be more than honored to have this anywhere. Just drop me a note.
Genre: Drama/ Romance It's not angst-y, but it's not fluff, I guess.
Author's Note: okay I made Sydney a few years older than she actually is, just for the purpose of significance. And I know Francie doesn't have a restaurant until second season, but I mean, as I say in the story, 9 months has passed since the first chapter, so just pretend certain things remained the same. And I know there's not much S/Vness in the beginning but more chapters are soon to follow so don't worry .This one was just Sydney dealing with what is going to happen... or what is not going to happen. okay I know that this last part has been promised for a while, and I swear it will be up within the next few days. until then... it's time for the actual Season Finale, which I can't wait for. okay that's it for now. a short, not so s/v chapter, but it's all good. The next chapter will make up for it I promise.
Previously:
The last line of the last page read as following:
"Agents Heading Operation:
From Headquarters: Dir. Devlin, Assistant Dir. Davenport
On Site: Senior Agent Vaughn and Agent Weiss
Agents Bristow (Sydney A., and Jack D.) to maintain cover.
Operation to take over SD-6 (simultaneous with all Alliance Cells) to commence 1100 hours on April 17th."
-----Happy Birthday to me. -----
Chapter Four:
She woke up on her thirtieth birthday wondering if life could get more symbolic. Turning thirty was a big deal, she thought, lying in her bed, eyes not yet open. She remembered the threshold between twenty-nine and thirty in The Great Gatsby, the difference between carefreeness and love and hurt and consequence. -----I remember that Friends episode where they all turn thirty. Should I be pulling a Joey and crying like a baby?------- The idea of throwing a temper tantrum, even if it was against a force as unstoppable as time, seemed strangely appealing.
------ Welcome to phase two of your life: on this trip, we have personalized it for you, Sydney Bristow. Most women hit marriage and motherhood, but specially for you, this phase is a one-way ride to lonely menopause, barren and resembling an old maid.----- Or at least, that would be what she was thinking if not for the best birthday present she could ever receive. According to the incessant beeping that she had halted a few minutes ago, it would be approximately 6:15 in the morning, leaving her five hours to ponder what could perhaps turn out to be the best day of her life. Or the worst day, ending with all her hopes crashing down. She could be found out as a double today. She could have to go into Witness Protection, and never see Dixon, or Marshal, or Francie and Will, or Weiss, or her father... or Vaughn. Well she hadn't seen Vaughn for nine months now, but if she left there would be no way that he could risk the little contact they had now.
So this day could turn into the day all her hopes came crashing down, or where she was finally set free. But technically didn't every day of her life carry that risk? ----- Five hours of this? I just want this day to be over.----- It was funny, she'd always enjoyed her birthdays before, she'd never wanted them to end. She usually managed to get the day off from SD-6, and in the recent years she'd gotten off from the CIA too. When she was younger, they were horrible days of barren silence with her dad, but once she'd gone to college it had been great. The first year she'd known Francie, she'd gotten a huge surprise party and ever since then she'd spent it with friends or Danny -----Danny-----. But today? She needed the closure that came with knowing the day was either a success or a failure. She could deal with whatever was thrown at her, but it was that not knowing that was driving her crazy. She finally opened her eyes.
----- Yes, your thirtieth birthday is a huge deal.----- It had to be, judging from the amount of balloons and banners that hung in her room. -----If only Will and Francie knew how big a deal mine is.----- She sat up and swung her legs over the side, only to step on a loud horn of some sort, that scared her half out of her wits.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" -----There go the other half.----- Francie and Will burst into her room. They shouted congratulations and salutations at her until she finally let them lead her into the kitchen.
"You have to go to work today right?" Francie asked, but she was smiling. ----- Today might just be my last day, Fran.-----
"Yeah. What's that they say about no rest for the wicked?" she replied. Will laughed.
"Well we figured as much, so we have a birthday breakfast," Francie said, unveiling the meal. Sydney laughed. Heaped in the table was orange juice and coffee poured into plastic cups that read "happy birthday". The forks and knives and spoons, too, were party cutlery, and each plastic plate had a birthday hat sitting on it. Best were the pancakes, which had candles stuck into the top.
"You guys, this is too much!" she said. ----- Hopefully, I'll be able to do this for you guys soon.----- The three sat down to breakfast, happily laughing and reminscing old times. A comfortable silence settled over the table, until Francie broke it.
"You know, I know it's your birthday and all, Syd, but there's something I've been meaning to ask you," Francie said. Sydney looked up, eyes questioning and mouth full. "What ever happened to picture frame guy?" ----- aggh aggh aghh.----- Syndey choked. Will handed her a birthday cup full of juice and she took a long sip, thankfully, and gave her self time to breath and formulate an answer.
"What do you mean?" Sydney said. ----- Damn it. Why do I have to bluch at the drop of a hat?-----
"Look at you, going all scarlet. Whatever happened to that guy?" Francie asked. -----What didn't happen to that guy?-----
"I don't really see him anymore. We kind of keep in touch through a mutual friend, but we haven't seen each other in ages," Sydney said, diplomatically.
"Nothing happened?" Francie asked. ----- Uhh....-----
"Nothing. What'd you think would happen?" ----- Dammit Sydney. Just let it be!-----
"I don't know. It seemed like that gift was extra-special." ----- Not as special as this one.----- "And I don't know. You liked it a lot. I don't know. I just got a feeling," Francie said, shrugging. ----- Should have been a spy, Fran, you should have been a spy.----- "Is he hot?" ----- Aghh aghh aghh. Damn my unfunctioning esophagus.----- Sydney recovered quickly this time, no juice neccessary.
"Is he hot?" Sydney repeated. Francie nodded hungrily. "Yeah... he is. He's hot. Really hot, actually." ----- Motor mouth much?-----
"Oh yeah? You think you will ever seen him again?" Francie asked. Will watched hungrily, wondering who this mystery man in Sydney's-- or not in Sydney's life-- was. Sydney decided to inject some truth into the web of lies she fed her friends.
"Well actually, I have this... conference of sorts today, and if it goes well... Well this takeover will mean that I get to see him again, because he switched divisions a while ago, and I stuck with..." Sydney trailed off as Francie looked at her blandly and Will feigned sleep. "Fine. You asked you know."
"I'm sorry Syd. I'd listen if I understood a word," Will replied.
"And on my birthday too!" she cried, mockingly. Will laughed and checked his watch.
"Sorry. I'll make it up to you later. But right now, I have to go. It's 7:30, and I have an interview at 8:15," Will said, kissing her cheek. He grabbed his coat and hurried out the door.
"Me, too, Syd! I have to open the restaurant early for a health inspection. Sorry," Francie said, apoligizingly. Sydney shrugged.
"Don't worry about it .I have to be at work by 8:30, anyway," she said. Francie nodded and kissed her on her cheek. Wishing her once more, she hurried out the door. Sydney sighed, realizing that now, her day ----- Multitask Day: Take Down SD-6 and Turn Thirty----- had truly begun. Her father had arranged the cover that both of them would be out on some bogus mission he concocted, in order for both of them to retain the cover. She'd sit in a van, outside the Credit Dauphine building, while CIA officers finished up the job she'd been pursuing for two years... given that everything went right. She went to take a shower, and an hour she found herself in the CIA Operations Center. She had hoped to see Vaughn but she passed his office and he was nowhere to be found. Weiss quickly found her outside his door and told her Vaughn was already on site, preparing for the raid. She breathed deeply ----- I could see him in five hours----- and followed Weiss to the main area.
"You ready for this?" Weiss asked. Sydney looked at him wryly.
"Please. I've been ready for this since the day I walked in to the CIA," she said. She laughed and looked up at him. "Did Vaughn ever tell you I thought I'd bring down SD-6 in two months?"
"Yeah he did," Weiss said. ----- Well now I know why Weiss sometimes looks at me like I'm mentally deficit.----- "I laughed like... like I shouldn't have laughed, but it was funny. Like honestly, it was just really naive and... I'm just digging a deeper hole."
"Yeah, way to catch on," Sydney said, fighting the smile on her face.
"Well look at it this way. If it had taken two months, you would have been out of here and you'd never have gotten to know Vaughn as well as you have," Weiss conjectured. Sydney shrugged. She wanted to hug him for the use of present tense only, but she settled for a smile. He wasn't done. "And you would have never gotten so close, and he would have never gotten fired and I would have never become your handler. And then you would have never know me, which is a tragedy totally and utterly." Sydney's smile grew. He still wasn't done. "And of course, Vaughn would have never started that hockey league which means I would have never gotten those scars. And then I'd never have picked up that chick at the bar the other night, and then I'd never have gotten so--"
"Please stop. I understand. There's an upside to all this. I get it," Sydney said. Weiss laughed.
"I could have stopped at the first sentence, but that would just not have been me would it?" he retorted .She grinned. The smile from Weiss's face dropped quickly and he nodded behind her. She turned and saw her father coming.
"They're going to load the vans now. We'll be sitting in the one with audio and video surveilance so we can see what is going on," Jack said, stoicly. Sydney nodded.
"I'll give you two a few minutes," Weiss said, excusing himself. "See you downstairs." Jack turned to Sydney.
----- Uh oh. Can't wait to hear this.-----
"I've been doing this a long time," he said, solemnly. Sydney nodded. "And I've wanted it to end a countless number of times." She gazed up at him, resembling the little girl that had doted on her father before everything came between them and made them more similar than ever-- betrayed, determined to right it, stubborn... vulnerable. He continued. "But nothing will make it as worthwhile as knowing that I've changed it for you. All I need is for you to be out of this life, to be happy." Sydney drew a reference to Vaughn-- both were men who somehow, always got the right meaning across with a few words.
"I couldn't have gotten through without you," Sydney replied. She hoped he recognized the significance of her words, saying she couldn't have gotten through rather than done the job. His curt nod gave away nothing, but the softening of his stern gaze and the almost nostalgic twinkle in his eye showed her that he had understood.
"If at the end of the day this doesn't come through," he said. Alarm bells sounded off in Sydney's head now that someone had voiced the thoughts that had run through her head for the past two weeks. "Then, just know that the one good thing to come out of that will be that more than ever, I will be your father Sydney. And we will do this together." She nodded, her eyes tearing up. He continued. "I'll do my best on my part, to make sure that happens in either outcome." The tears fell. ----- 8:30 am and I'm already crying.----- Her father wasn't done however.
"You've lost a lot of people Sydney. Your mother, me, Danny, your mother and me once again, Emily, Vaughn" Sydney's head snapped up. -----Whoa. Did he just say....?----- "and I hope that by the end of the day, you have two of us back," he said, looking her straight in the eye. The tears fell more rapidly, but a slow smile formed, redrawing their path, so thath the tears spilled over the apples of her cheeks, rather than dripping down the angle of her chin. "Know that no matter what, you'll have one of us." Sydney nodded, and slowly, tentatively embraced her father. He kissed her hair almost impercetibly, and pulled away.
"This is it," she said. He nodded, gave a brief, hopeful smile, took her hand and led her into the basement.
Author: Annie
Rating: G
Timeline: Sometimes after "the Coup" but no real knowledge necessary. Just vague references. Anytime in Season One, I suppose.
Summary: "If she wasn't going to fight for love, then what were her grounds for wanting Vaughn in her life?" Sydney realizes some things are for secure, no matter what. S/V
Disclaimer: I seriously own nothing. Like seriously. You wouldn't believe.
Distribution: I'd be more than honored to have this anywhere. Just drop me a note.
Genre: Drama/ Romance It's not angst-y, but it's not fluff, I guess.
Author's Note: okay I made Sydney a few years older than she actually is, just for the purpose of significance. And I know Francie doesn't have a restaurant until second season, but I mean, as I say in the story, 9 months has passed since the first chapter, so just pretend certain things remained the same. And I know there's not much S/Vness in the beginning but more chapters are soon to follow so don't worry .This one was just Sydney dealing with what is going to happen... or what is not going to happen. okay I know that this last part has been promised for a while, and I swear it will be up within the next few days. until then... it's time for the actual Season Finale, which I can't wait for. okay that's it for now. a short, not so s/v chapter, but it's all good. The next chapter will make up for it I promise.
Previously:
The last line of the last page read as following:
"Agents Heading Operation:
From Headquarters: Dir. Devlin, Assistant Dir. Davenport
On Site: Senior Agent Vaughn and Agent Weiss
Agents Bristow (Sydney A., and Jack D.) to maintain cover.
Operation to take over SD-6 (simultaneous with all Alliance Cells) to commence 1100 hours on April 17th."
-----Happy Birthday to me. -----
Chapter Four:
She woke up on her thirtieth birthday wondering if life could get more symbolic. Turning thirty was a big deal, she thought, lying in her bed, eyes not yet open. She remembered the threshold between twenty-nine and thirty in The Great Gatsby, the difference between carefreeness and love and hurt and consequence. -----I remember that Friends episode where they all turn thirty. Should I be pulling a Joey and crying like a baby?------- The idea of throwing a temper tantrum, even if it was against a force as unstoppable as time, seemed strangely appealing.
------ Welcome to phase two of your life: on this trip, we have personalized it for you, Sydney Bristow. Most women hit marriage and motherhood, but specially for you, this phase is a one-way ride to lonely menopause, barren and resembling an old maid.----- Or at least, that would be what she was thinking if not for the best birthday present she could ever receive. According to the incessant beeping that she had halted a few minutes ago, it would be approximately 6:15 in the morning, leaving her five hours to ponder what could perhaps turn out to be the best day of her life. Or the worst day, ending with all her hopes crashing down. She could be found out as a double today. She could have to go into Witness Protection, and never see Dixon, or Marshal, or Francie and Will, or Weiss, or her father... or Vaughn. Well she hadn't seen Vaughn for nine months now, but if she left there would be no way that he could risk the little contact they had now.
So this day could turn into the day all her hopes came crashing down, or where she was finally set free. But technically didn't every day of her life carry that risk? ----- Five hours of this? I just want this day to be over.----- It was funny, she'd always enjoyed her birthdays before, she'd never wanted them to end. She usually managed to get the day off from SD-6, and in the recent years she'd gotten off from the CIA too. When she was younger, they were horrible days of barren silence with her dad, but once she'd gone to college it had been great. The first year she'd known Francie, she'd gotten a huge surprise party and ever since then she'd spent it with friends or Danny -----Danny-----. But today? She needed the closure that came with knowing the day was either a success or a failure. She could deal with whatever was thrown at her, but it was that not knowing that was driving her crazy. She finally opened her eyes.
----- Yes, your thirtieth birthday is a huge deal.----- It had to be, judging from the amount of balloons and banners that hung in her room. -----If only Will and Francie knew how big a deal mine is.----- She sat up and swung her legs over the side, only to step on a loud horn of some sort, that scared her half out of her wits.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" -----There go the other half.----- Francie and Will burst into her room. They shouted congratulations and salutations at her until she finally let them lead her into the kitchen.
"You have to go to work today right?" Francie asked, but she was smiling. ----- Today might just be my last day, Fran.-----
"Yeah. What's that they say about no rest for the wicked?" she replied. Will laughed.
"Well we figured as much, so we have a birthday breakfast," Francie said, unveiling the meal. Sydney laughed. Heaped in the table was orange juice and coffee poured into plastic cups that read "happy birthday". The forks and knives and spoons, too, were party cutlery, and each plastic plate had a birthday hat sitting on it. Best were the pancakes, which had candles stuck into the top.
"You guys, this is too much!" she said. ----- Hopefully, I'll be able to do this for you guys soon.----- The three sat down to breakfast, happily laughing and reminscing old times. A comfortable silence settled over the table, until Francie broke it.
"You know, I know it's your birthday and all, Syd, but there's something I've been meaning to ask you," Francie said. Sydney looked up, eyes questioning and mouth full. "What ever happened to picture frame guy?" ----- aggh aggh aghh.----- Syndey choked. Will handed her a birthday cup full of juice and she took a long sip, thankfully, and gave her self time to breath and formulate an answer.
"What do you mean?" Sydney said. ----- Damn it. Why do I have to bluch at the drop of a hat?-----
"Look at you, going all scarlet. Whatever happened to that guy?" Francie asked. -----What didn't happen to that guy?-----
"I don't really see him anymore. We kind of keep in touch through a mutual friend, but we haven't seen each other in ages," Sydney said, diplomatically.
"Nothing happened?" Francie asked. ----- Uhh....-----
"Nothing. What'd you think would happen?" ----- Dammit Sydney. Just let it be!-----
"I don't know. It seemed like that gift was extra-special." ----- Not as special as this one.----- "And I don't know. You liked it a lot. I don't know. I just got a feeling," Francie said, shrugging. ----- Should have been a spy, Fran, you should have been a spy.----- "Is he hot?" ----- Aghh aghh aghh. Damn my unfunctioning esophagus.----- Sydney recovered quickly this time, no juice neccessary.
"Is he hot?" Sydney repeated. Francie nodded hungrily. "Yeah... he is. He's hot. Really hot, actually." ----- Motor mouth much?-----
"Oh yeah? You think you will ever seen him again?" Francie asked. Will watched hungrily, wondering who this mystery man in Sydney's-- or not in Sydney's life-- was. Sydney decided to inject some truth into the web of lies she fed her friends.
"Well actually, I have this... conference of sorts today, and if it goes well... Well this takeover will mean that I get to see him again, because he switched divisions a while ago, and I stuck with..." Sydney trailed off as Francie looked at her blandly and Will feigned sleep. "Fine. You asked you know."
"I'm sorry Syd. I'd listen if I understood a word," Will replied.
"And on my birthday too!" she cried, mockingly. Will laughed and checked his watch.
"Sorry. I'll make it up to you later. But right now, I have to go. It's 7:30, and I have an interview at 8:15," Will said, kissing her cheek. He grabbed his coat and hurried out the door.
"Me, too, Syd! I have to open the restaurant early for a health inspection. Sorry," Francie said, apoligizingly. Sydney shrugged.
"Don't worry about it .I have to be at work by 8:30, anyway," she said. Francie nodded and kissed her on her cheek. Wishing her once more, she hurried out the door. Sydney sighed, realizing that now, her day ----- Multitask Day: Take Down SD-6 and Turn Thirty----- had truly begun. Her father had arranged the cover that both of them would be out on some bogus mission he concocted, in order for both of them to retain the cover. She'd sit in a van, outside the Credit Dauphine building, while CIA officers finished up the job she'd been pursuing for two years... given that everything went right. She went to take a shower, and an hour she found herself in the CIA Operations Center. She had hoped to see Vaughn but she passed his office and he was nowhere to be found. Weiss quickly found her outside his door and told her Vaughn was already on site, preparing for the raid. She breathed deeply ----- I could see him in five hours----- and followed Weiss to the main area.
"You ready for this?" Weiss asked. Sydney looked at him wryly.
"Please. I've been ready for this since the day I walked in to the CIA," she said. She laughed and looked up at him. "Did Vaughn ever tell you I thought I'd bring down SD-6 in two months?"
"Yeah he did," Weiss said. ----- Well now I know why Weiss sometimes looks at me like I'm mentally deficit.----- "I laughed like... like I shouldn't have laughed, but it was funny. Like honestly, it was just really naive and... I'm just digging a deeper hole."
"Yeah, way to catch on," Sydney said, fighting the smile on her face.
"Well look at it this way. If it had taken two months, you would have been out of here and you'd never have gotten to know Vaughn as well as you have," Weiss conjectured. Sydney shrugged. She wanted to hug him for the use of present tense only, but she settled for a smile. He wasn't done. "And you would have never gotten so close, and he would have never gotten fired and I would have never become your handler. And then you would have never know me, which is a tragedy totally and utterly." Sydney's smile grew. He still wasn't done. "And of course, Vaughn would have never started that hockey league which means I would have never gotten those scars. And then I'd never have picked up that chick at the bar the other night, and then I'd never have gotten so--"
"Please stop. I understand. There's an upside to all this. I get it," Sydney said. Weiss laughed.
"I could have stopped at the first sentence, but that would just not have been me would it?" he retorted .She grinned. The smile from Weiss's face dropped quickly and he nodded behind her. She turned and saw her father coming.
"They're going to load the vans now. We'll be sitting in the one with audio and video surveilance so we can see what is going on," Jack said, stoicly. Sydney nodded.
"I'll give you two a few minutes," Weiss said, excusing himself. "See you downstairs." Jack turned to Sydney.
----- Uh oh. Can't wait to hear this.-----
"I've been doing this a long time," he said, solemnly. Sydney nodded. "And I've wanted it to end a countless number of times." She gazed up at him, resembling the little girl that had doted on her father before everything came between them and made them more similar than ever-- betrayed, determined to right it, stubborn... vulnerable. He continued. "But nothing will make it as worthwhile as knowing that I've changed it for you. All I need is for you to be out of this life, to be happy." Sydney drew a reference to Vaughn-- both were men who somehow, always got the right meaning across with a few words.
"I couldn't have gotten through without you," Sydney replied. She hoped he recognized the significance of her words, saying she couldn't have gotten through rather than done the job. His curt nod gave away nothing, but the softening of his stern gaze and the almost nostalgic twinkle in his eye showed her that he had understood.
"If at the end of the day this doesn't come through," he said. Alarm bells sounded off in Sydney's head now that someone had voiced the thoughts that had run through her head for the past two weeks. "Then, just know that the one good thing to come out of that will be that more than ever, I will be your father Sydney. And we will do this together." She nodded, her eyes tearing up. He continued. "I'll do my best on my part, to make sure that happens in either outcome." The tears fell. ----- 8:30 am and I'm already crying.----- Her father wasn't done however.
"You've lost a lot of people Sydney. Your mother, me, Danny, your mother and me once again, Emily, Vaughn" Sydney's head snapped up. -----Whoa. Did he just say....?----- "and I hope that by the end of the day, you have two of us back," he said, looking her straight in the eye. The tears fell more rapidly, but a slow smile formed, redrawing their path, so thath the tears spilled over the apples of her cheeks, rather than dripping down the angle of her chin. "Know that no matter what, you'll have one of us." Sydney nodded, and slowly, tentatively embraced her father. He kissed her hair almost impercetibly, and pulled away.
"This is it," she said. He nodded, gave a brief, hopeful smile, took her hand and led her into the basement.