Disclaimer: The fact that I even have to write the word "disclaimer" means that I don't own it.
Author's Note: Once again, thanks to everyone who reviewed the previous chapters of this fic. You have no idea how much encouragement it gave me to keep on going! Hopefully, you'll find chapter 3 up to par along with the others. Thanks again and R/R!
:Chapter 3:
Yami and Bakura were finally drawing near to the check out counter. Both waited anxiously in silence while they inched closer and closer. An old lady was in front of them, and it was now her turn to be served.
"Hello," greeted the cashier, who was obviously trying very hard to sound cheerful. "Did you find everything to your satisfaction?"
"Yes, I did," replied the little old lady.
"Good. Is this all?"
"Yes," she answered once again.
"Would you like to join our membership club?"
"No, thank you."
"Are you sure? You save ten percent off almost everything in the store."
Yami's patience was growing thinner by the moment, although it was nothing compared to Bakura's. Yami saw Bakura glare at the cashier lady from the corner of his eye.
Great. He's about to go insane again, thought Yami.
"Yes, I'm sure, miss," said the old lady again.
"It doesn't cost anything at all," prodded the cashier lady. "And you also get-"
"Damn it, how many times do I have to tell you, Miss?! I don't want any freakin' membership so just get the hell on with my checkout!" the little old lady screamed with great lung capacity.
Yami was quite surprised and Bakura laughed out loud.
"Woooo!" Bakura cheered, raising a fist. "Go, Grandma!"
The little old lady turned to Bakura.
"And I don't need any lip from you, young man, so hush up!"
…
"…Yes, ma'am."
Yami couldn't help but laugh.
~*~*~*~*~
The old lady had moved on and it was now their turn to check out. The cashier lady scanned and punched in all their items until she suddenly stopped.
"What's wrong?" asked Yami.
"I'm sorry, Sir. But this is the express lane."
"You could have fooled me," Yami commented, everything getting down to his last nerve.
"You have more than 20 items. You can only have 20 items or less to checkout."
"WHAT?!" both Yami and Bakura yelled at the same time. Yami tried to calm down but couldn't stop his twitching brow. Bakura, on the other hand, let it all out.
"NO! We almost make it out of here alive and you come and stop us because of the amount of items we have?! I'll murder whoever makes up all these damned rules!!"
The cashier clerk only blinked.
"You're going to have to get into another line."
"Aggh!" grunted a very frustrated Yami. He was so desperately angry that he didn't even notice the Eye of Ra starting to glow on his forehead.
"Woah! That's a really weird rash you've got there!" exclaimed the cashier clerk in awe.
"…A rash?"
"Yeah! It's like, glowing! Wow, that must be really itchy!" She pointed to Yami's forehead.
Bakura, despite the situation, began laughing so hard his stomach started to hurt.
"It's NOT a rash!!" Yami hollered, only making the third-eye glow even brighter, reflecting his anger. "It's a sign of Ra and a symbol of my powers!"
"Yeah, whatever. You know, we've got some really good skin cream for-"
"NEVERMIND THAT!" Yami let out all his previous anger in those two words. The entire store went quiet.
Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out…
"…Is there any way you can proceed with the checkout?" he asked quietly, his third eye starting to flicker away.
"You can't have anymore than 20 items."
"Fine, then."
Yami then started to open up all the produce bags and empty some of them into others. He tossed empty plastic bags to the side, not saying a word through the entire process. He did this all with an impressive amount of speed.
"What are you doing now?" asked Bakura.
A few minutes passed. People in line were growing more and more impatient, but none dare spoke a word to the two volatile teens in front of them.
"THERE!" announced Yami triumphantly. "Twenty items!"
Bakura peeked into the cart.
Yami had stuffed as many different types of fruits or vegetables he could into one bag, and did the same with the others. It was a strange sight. Onions were mixed in with the lemons, and carrots were mixed together with parsley and strawberries. He had done this until there were exactly 20 items and 20 items only. Each bag looked like it was about to explode.
"Happy now?" he asked.
"…I'll have to talk to my manager about that," said the clerk.
"AGGGHHHH!" Yami yelled, the Eye of Ra appearing once again.
"Okay, okay!" she said, giving in. "Don't lose your temper; it's bad for your rash!"
~*~*~*~*~
The cashier finished ringing up the price and told it to Yami. Yami began digging around in his pockets for the money that Yugi had given him to pay for it all.
"No, stop right there," Bakura interrupted, holding a square piece of plastic in his hand.
"A credit card? Does Ryou have one of those?" Yami wondered.
"Ha, that's funny. No, he doesn't, and if he did, he wouldn't be stupid enough to lend it to me."
"It couldn't possibly be yours?" The ancient Pharaoh wondered if a Yami could apply for a credit card.
"I never said it was mine," Bakura explained, sliding the card through the machine. He waited for it to be approved. When it was, he smiled evilly.
"All right…"
"Whom did you steal that from?!"
Bakura slapped his hand over Yami's mouth.
"Steal? Why, what could you possibly be talking about?" he said, facing the clerk with a fake smile. "You must have had too much to drink again, my friend! Ha, what did I tell you about that?"
Yami tried to say something, but it came out muffled and unintelligible.
Bakura waited as the clerk put all the items in plastic bags and handed Bakura the receipt.
"You two have a nice day," she said.
"Heh, already too late for that," said Bakura as Yami smacked his hand off of his mouth. The two silently put the bags into their cart and walked off.
~*~*~*~*~
When they had exited the store, Yami got his chance to continue with the interrogation.
"Where did you get that credit, card?!"
"Calm down, Pharaoh. It belongs to my Aibou's father," he said coolly.
"Does he know you have it?"
"He will when he gets the bill," responded Bakura.
Yami opened his mouth to say something but decided against it. It would have landed on deaf ears, anyhow.
The two walked to their little white car and Yami opened the trunk, stuffing all the bags in the back with much effort. He pushed the now empty cart to Bakura.
"Get rid of it," he commanded.
"No problem."
Bakura shoved the squeaky cart down the parking lot with all his strength.
"Wait, what are you doing?!"
"Getting rid of it!"
"That cart has a faulty wheel!"
"So?"
The cart rode smoothly downhill, until it suddenly averted course and made a sharp left, slamming right into a shiny red Porsche.
"Oooh, that's gonna cost a lot to fix." You can guess who said that.
"HEY! Who just wrecked my car?!"
Both Bakura and Yami stood there dumbfounded.
"I say we drive until there's no tomorrow," the spirit of the ring suggested.
"For once, I agree," the spirit of the puzzle said.
Both hopped into the car and with Bakura at the wheel, drove off.
~*~*~*~*~
"Wait, we still haven't gotten everything on the list!"
"I know," said Bakura.
"Then why are we heading home?!"
"We're not heading home."
"Yes, we are! You're going the wrong-"
At that moment Bakura made a lethally sharp (and most likely illegal) U-turn, once again cutting Yami short and letting the poor Pharaoh slam sideways into the door again.
"OW! Will you warn me when you do that next time?!" Yami growled, deciding it was now a good time to put on his seat belt.
"At least we're not going the wrong way anymore. What's on the list?"
Bakura threw Ryou's shopping list to the back seat, the crumpled piece of paper bouncing off of Yami's fore head and landing in his lap.
Yami unfolded it and compared the two lists.
"Clothes, mostly," he stated. At the very bottom of Yugi's list, he noticed something written messily. He squinted in order to read it, trying his best to do so when Bakura was driving crazily like he was.
It read:
And Yami, pick me up a few of those new duel monster cards... Grandpa's outta stock. Please? I wuuuuv you.
Yami smiled at his Aibou's scribbling and Bakura noticed this from the rear-view mirror.
"What?" Bakura asked suspiciously.
Yami quickly wiped his own smile off his face, retaining his serious composure.
"And cards. We need to get some cards," he answered.
"Cards?"
"Duel Monster cards."
Bakura sneered.
"We're not here to shop for you, we're here to shop for our little 'lights'", he scoffed.
"They're not for me. It's on the list."
"Whose list?"
"Yugi's list," said Yami.
"Ah, yes…of course," Bakura sneered.
"…What?"
"Nothing…"
"What?!"
"Nothing!"
"WHAT?!"
"NOTHING, YOU DAMN PHARAOH! SHUT UP AND LET ME DRIVE!"
Yami crossed his arms and slumped against the back seat, glaring dangerously and his third eye beginning to glow. He was about two seconds away from killing Bakura.
…
"…Warning," said Bakura out of nowhere.
"What?" Yami questioned coldly.
Screeeeeeeeech!
The tires screamed as Bakura gave the road one of his neck-snapping turns. He grinned as Yami gave a cry of surprise, although no "thump" was heard this time due to the seat belt he wore. He tore into a large shopping center and stopped abruptly once inside a parking spot, causing both occupants to lurch forward.
"Welcome to the largest shopping center in the district. Here, you'll find anything and everything your Aibous forced you to come out and buy! Come one, come all!" Bakura mock-announced.
"How did you know this place was here?" asked Yami once he recovered from Bakura-driving syndrome.
"You find a lot of interesting things when you pry around in Ryou's brain." The spirit then exited the car, followed by Yami.
"Feel free to get lost in the crowds and leave me alone," Bakura hinted rather bluntly, walking along the sidewalks and elbowing past people who had the misfortune to stand in his way.
"I don't trust you," said Yami just as bluntly.
"Oh dear. My heart bleeds."
"…Don't tempt me."
The two bitter spirits strolled through, their day far from over.
~*~*~*~*~
Author's Note: And another chapter comes to an end! I personally had a harder time writing this one. Too me, it feels as if there isn't enough going on. Maybe that's just me. Tell me what you think with plenty of reviews, please! ^_^