Disclaimer: Sorry to disappoint you, but I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!!
Author's Note: I'M BACK! Why was I gone, you ask? Well, first of all, I was sent to the shadow realm by a certain evil spirit and then was chased around the place by Kuribohs for about a month or two. Really! What? Stop looking at me like that! AHHHH!
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:Chapter 5:
As much as the two spirits wanted the day to end, it only seemed to drag on by the minute. There was no stopping the constant complains coming from Bakura and the sharp replies from Yami.
"Dammit, there are hundreds of places to shop for clothes! Just pick one already!"
"These are all women's stores, you idiot! We probably parked on the wrong side of the shopping center…and I wonder whose fault was that?"
…
"…I am going to kill my Aibou when I get home…" murmured Bakura venomously.
"I may have to have a word or two with my Aibou also," Yami sighed, wondering if Yugi enjoyed putting him through this torture.
In actuality, both were a little surprised that they had made it so far into the day without killing each other. Although it would make Yami feel a lot better by lopping off Bakura's head when he got the chance, his Aibou and Ryou would most likely frown upon that.
Besides, after buying clothes, they would be able to go home. Yes, what a wonderful thought. He would lock himself into his puzzle for a couple of days doing nothing but sleeping.
Yami smiled at this, forgetting their goal of looking for a place to shop. He completely walked passed a compatible clothes shop, Bakura stopping and looking after him.
"Hey! HEY!" Bakura stretched out an arm and grabbed Yami by the choker he always wore. Needless to say, the accessory started to live up to its name.
"Wha-? ACK!" Yami fell back, almost tripping over himself.
"Get your damned head out of the clouds and get in there!"
Bakura forcefully shoved a confused Yami into the shop and reluctantly followed, grumbling to himself.
~*~*~*~*~
Both spirits looked around the huge store filled with teen's clothes and blinked. There was a void expression on their faces.
"Where do we start?" Yami asked, starting to feel intimidated by all the clothes staring back at him. So many colors…it was beginning to make him dizzy.
"Well, what the hell does it say on the list?!" Bakura snatched the list away from Yami's hand, scanning over it. The day was obviously starting to take its toll on him; he was in a much worse mood than usual. And that was saying a lot.
The white-haired teen gave a loud growl when he read what it said on the list.
"'Clothes'?!"
"What?" wondered Yami, startled at the sudden outburst.
"'CLOTHES!'"
"…Yeeesss, we've got that part down already. What kind of clothes?" he retorted sarcastically.
"That's all it says! Clothes!" Bakura shoved the list in the former Pharaoh's face. "The hell?! Stupid Aibou! Doesn't even know how to make a proper list!"
Bakura looked like he was about to snap. All of it was too much for the guy.
Yami raised an eyebrow and looked at Bakura nervously, who continued to yell out loud for the whole store to hear.
"Perhaps you should sit down," Yami advised carefully. "I don't think you can handle this without murdering somebody."
"I CAN DO IT!" Bakura screamed in Yami's face, deafening his ears slightly. "I don't need your pity! I make a fine shopping-for-clothes-person-spirit-thing! Haha, jealous are we?!"
Once again, there was a crazed glint in the Spirit of the Ring's eye, and this time it was starting to scare Yami. He didn't feel like making Bakura search for his sanity and instead thought of a much easier idea.
"Fine, then. You go shop for the clothes you think Ryou would like, and I'll do the same for my Aibou. When you're done, just meet me at the front desk. That should be simple enough for even you to do," Yami added.
"Fine!" replied Bakura.
And so the search began…
~*~*~*~*~
Yami had found a section that interested him, and he shifted through the pieces of clothing, looking for something that Yugi might like. After all, if he liked it, then surely his Aibou would too.
Bakura, on the other hand, was doing the same thing, just on the other side of the store. It seemed like he had regained most of his lost sanity; his mumbling to himself had died down.
Yami was looking at the price tags and wincing when he saw the money he would have to pay.
Maybe this was a bad place to shop…too late to back down now, though. I'm ashamed to even think this, but I guess we will have to put that credit card to use. …I suppose I'll just pay back Ryou's father…somehow…
On the other hand, Bakura seemed like he didn't even know price tags existed. If he saw something he liked, he grabbed it immediately, without giving the little tag a glance.
Finally, after vigorous looking, the two came back, hands full of clothes.
They stared at each other's assembly for a minute, then suddenly laughed out loud.
"HAH! You've got to be kidding me!" they both said at the same time. Hearing this, they both glared at each other at the same time, also.
"What's wrong with this?!"
"What's wrong with this?!"
"It's all black!"
"It's all leather!"
…
"So?!"
"So?!"
"There's no way Ryou would go for that!"
"There's no way Yugi would go for that!"
"Agh, just shut up!" both said at the same time…again.
All the while, a confused cashier lady was staring at them, having no idea what to do.
"Um…excuse me?" she asked cautiously.
"WHAT?!"
"WHAT?!"
"Are you…ready to checkout?"
"No, we're not!" Yami said, this time by himself. "If we're going to use that credit card, I'm going to make sure the money doesn't go to waste! Like I said, Ryou would never wear such a thing!"
"And you think Yugi would wear that? Please, all the cows in the world would be after him if he did," Bakura scoffed.
"I happen to look good in leather! Therefore, Yugi looks good in leather because he is me and I am him!"
The cashier lady continued to stare.
"And I look good in black! How is that any different from you and your Aibou?!"
"Ryou doesn't want to dress like he's going to rob a bank, that's how!"
"And Yugi doesn't want any vegetarians going for his life, either!"
"Fine then! How about we try these on and see exactly how good they look on us! If they happen to look horrible, which yours will, you have to put them back and find something more suitable! Agreed?"
"Agreed!"
Both ran as fast as they could into the dressing room to prove their point.
After a few moments they both ran out, searching about the store for sizes that actually fit them, and then scampered back into dressing rooms.
"…They must be drunk or something," thought the cashier lady out loud.
~*~*~*~*~
A few minutes later:
"HAHA!" came two yells at the same time as two of the dressing room doors flew open. Out came the two Yamis, looking proud.
Bakura, dressed in all black, scanned Yami, who was wearing all leather. He scoffed and turned around.
"I still think black looks better."
"Impossible. Leather is better," Yami argued.
"Besides," he continued in a lighter tone and turned around to look in the mirror, "I like this."
Bakura blinked and shoved Yami out of the way so he could see himself.
"As do I," he said, ignoring Yami's growl. "I'm going to get this for myself."
"What? You can't do that! What about Ryou?"
"I'll get the same thing for him, too. Although I don't think my puny Aibou would look half as good as I do now," Bakura commented, too lost in his own reflection to even notice Yami's frustration.
Yami just rolled his eyes.
~*~*~*~*~
The spirits soon walked out of the store, carrying the clothes in plastic bags. One was dressed in all black and the other in leather.
People stayed out of their way.
"YES! Finished! Finally!" Bakura screamed to the sky. "All that is left is the ride back!"
"Speaking of driving, I'll be doing that. There's no way I'm going through another ride with you as the driver."
"You know what? I couldn't give a damn!" Bakura yelled, more than happy that the day was coming to a close. "Drive to Egypt first if you want! I'm just finally going back home!"
Yami smirked as they took the long walk back to their car. Once there, they shoved the newly-bought clothes into the trunk, along with the fruits and vegetables they had gotten earlier, sitting there in the heat. With a slam of the trunk, Yami literally ran into the driver's seat, very much afraid that Bakura might beat him to it.
Luckily, that was not the case.
Bakura took his seat on the passenger's side, not caring who took the wheel, just as long as he got home and away from grocery stores and shopping centers for the rest of his long life ahead.
Yami put the keys in the ignition and gave it a twist, and the car gave a small start…
"Yes…!"
…and then died down.
"Come on!" Bakura hurried. "Let's go, already!"
"I'm trying!" came the shout, obviously becoming more and more frustrated.
He turned the key once more, this time to have nothing happen at all.
After a still moment of silence, Bakura began banging his head against the dashboard.
"Why…me….?"
There was a sudden scream of rage from Yami that surprised even Bakura.
"AGH! YOU!" he pointed a shaky finger at Bakura and the eye on his forehead began to glow fiercely. "You left the headlights on, didn't you?! DIDN'T YOU?!"
Now it was Bakura's turn to become wary of Yami's lack of sanity. The only reply was silence. Yami looked like he was about to explode.
"Just…just…" Yami tried to keep his cool, but Bakura's annoying silence made it all fall apart. "DIE, SOUL STEALER!"
Yami then leapt at Bakura's throat with a frenzied look in his eyes.
"Ack-!" came the sound from Bakura's throat. "Let…go…idiot…Ph-"
He had no time to speak, or no patience for that matter, because then he sent his own hands around Yami's throat and they both struggled against each other. Yami's shoulder rammed against the wheel during the chaos and the car horn blared. They couldn't understand each other's sentences, nor could they care, but all were something along the lines of death and the shadow realm and the like.
A few people walking past stopped and stared.
"I've got my money on the spiky-haired one," said a man.
"No way, the other one is gonna win…ouch, that looked like that hurt," commented another.
And so they day didn't quite come to the end that was expected, and turned out becoming more delayed than ever…
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AN: Review! Review! I'm alive! Review, already!