Author's note: All characters belong to Squaresoft.
Just a small note to say thank you to all those who reviewed… like I said, it lights up my day. Thank you very much, each one of you.^_^
Zelly: Thank you very much. Yes, *nods* I found that out recently as well, which is why I altered the beginning of chapter one, since the other story was created before this one. However, I assure you that all the likeliness that it bears was coincidental. Many apologies, but it was truly unforeseen, and the matter was brought up after I created this tale. However, I decided to alter it, just in case.
BT and Natsumi: Yes, here's an update ^_^ Hope you like it.
Enough of my babble, on with the show.
We reached Corel, our journey almost complete. The gondola would take us to Gold Saucer, and technically he would be free of me. But I was not ready yet. I still had to put my plan into action, although even the plan itself was not clear in my mind. Oh well, that was simply a minor detail. The big problem now was, how did I convince Vincent to stay with me? Maybe it would happen here in Gold Saucer, maybe I could do it here. After all, what did it take for one of those miraculous conversions anyway? Not much, a startling revelation as the tormented soul slaps his forehead in wonder and realizes that he has been wrong all along, while the perfect heroine recieves all the credit due to her, along with the reward. No, it didn't seem that hard at all, although I was musing on what exactly the revelation would be, and how I would bring it about. The embedded scars in those dark eyes seemed quite deep, and even I had not completely figured out each of their origin. Oh, most I had guessed way before the defeat of Sephiroth. I wasn't a ninja for nothing: we were known for our keen minds, deductive, and eavesdropping skills. Yet some of them still puzzled me, but I was not going to give in. Never. My train of thought was interrupted as Vincent abruptly stopped in the middle of the platform, turning around. I, of course, noticed this too late and walked straight into him.
„Ooof" I protested. He simply stared at me with a raised eyebrow, and I realized it to be a frustrating habit of his.
„I think I shall take leave of you here, Yuffie. I trust you can make your way up to Gold Saucer on your own. Although I'm still puzzled as to why you were so keen to have me escort you here. However, I suppose we all have our reasons, and I'm simply content to say that our deal is done." He said calmly. Oh no, oh no, oh no! What was I going to do? I had to think fast!
„But Vincent! I said to escort me to Gold Saucer. Which means up there." I pointed to the gondola.
„You never specified that Yuffie."
„Oh yes I did! I said Gold Saucer! This isn't Gold Saucer!" I stamped my foot and did my puppy dog expression. Yes, that always seemed to work.
„…" He began to walk towards the part where the gondola stopped, and I could feel the annoyance wafting off him in great waves. But I didn't care, I had done it! Although I was getting desperate. What after? What if the „sin" technique didn't work? No, it had to. If all else failed I'd cut the wires of the gondola and then he'd have to stay here with me. I wasn't going back. It wasn't only the materia, it was my pride. The small voice popped up once again and questioned whether I didn't stop because I had seen the moon wash over his profile and show me the scars that ate him away. Nah, I thought as I mentally clubbed the tiny voice to death, again. Did these pestering mental voices not die?!
Suddenly the gondola arrived and I rejoiced. Unfortunately my internal celebration didn't last long. As soon as the doors opened a swarm of tourists emerged. Hey, the one on the right looked a little familiar…
„That's her! I remember she was right next to me when my bag got swiped!" A rich lady wearing thick layers of make-up and gaudy sunglasses proclaimed.
Yipes. I suppose these petty rich people didn't forget so easily. I recognized them from my last stay at Gold Saucer, when I had found bundles of treasure in the pockets of these men and women. A man with an ornate gold watch glared as he motioned to the rest of his filthy rich companions. Uhoh. This wasn't so good, was it?
They swarmed around him and he gesticulated wildly. They seemed to argue a little and I thought I heard „No! Burn her!" I prayed to Leviathan it was only my imagination. It was becoming a little awkward, standing in front of a crowd of tourists who seemed to be intently discussing my fate. It was definitely time to clear out. I motioned to Vincent with my eyes, and then I silently pointed to the gondola. I recieved a curt nod, and I was just about to stealthily creep past them when they suddenly quietened; it seemed they had come to an agreement. They all looked up at the same time, and frightened the living daylights out of me. It was as if they were one entity. They formed a mob and began to advance towards me.
Oh my gawd! They were going to lynch me! How brutal! You'd think these aristocrats were more civilised! Reflexively my left hand gripped my neck protectively as the other reached out and snagged Vincent's sleeve. Then I turned and fled, dragging him behind me. I wasn't even thinking as I tore through Corel, not even caring that I was leaving our planned destination behind me. Gosh, these people were vindictive. They never forgot anything. You'd think they had more common sense or something. It's not like everything I stole couldn't be replaced. They just got upset over nothing.
When we left the outskirts of Corel and retreated into the mountains we lost them. I stopped and panted, trying to catch my breath. Finally I straightened up, only to be met with Vincent's glare.
„So, Yuffie. Care to enlighten me as to what exactly you've been doing for the past two years?"
„Um… uh… traveled, and accepted… donations?" I tried, a little unnerved. The glare only intensified. I kicked a few pebbles around, partly for revenge and partly because I was becoming really uncomfortable. Finally I ducked, unable to take anymore.
„Alright alright. I traveled around, gathering materia."
„Yuffie…" A warning.
„Alright! I stole materia. S-T-O-L-E. With a capital S. Alright? Happy now? Sheesh. You'd make a saint feel guilty." Vincent only nodded, my admittance accepted.
„Well, since I presume you won't be visiting Gold Saucer for a while, I think our deal is most definitely fulfilled now." He said, changing the subject. Uhoh. First a near death experience, and now Vincent trying to get away? This was too much!
„No!" I tried. Then I added, „Well, since you can't escort me to Gold Saucer, our deal is not fulfilled. So, you're just going to have to escort me to… Kalm!" Yes, that was far enough. Great one, Yuffie. We'd have to cross a whole sea. Surely that would be enough time. And look at that, why I'd even give up my health for him! After all, I was going to suffer one hell of a seasickness, and I'd do it all for him… and the materia of course.
„No." The word shattered my joy.
„Pleeeeeease." I begged.
„No. And I don't even know why you insist on my accompanying you to these places when you can manage for yourself."
„ Please? For old times sake?"
„Yuffie, being dragged to the other side of the world is simply not my idea of doing something for „old times sake"."
„You don't have anything to do anyway!" I retorted angrily.
„May I know why exactly you presume that?" Once again the raised eyebrow. He shook his head, as if he had come to an agreement, and suddenly he turned away, ready to leave. No! I couldn't let him walk away. I wasn't going to give up, I couldn't; it had dragged me way too deep. In frustration I shouted to his retreating back.
„I know you, Vincent! As much as you might loathe to admit it, I know you. And I know you won't do anything else but go back to that pitiful cave of yours, and mourn uselessly for the past!" I almost added that I knew more about him than he thought, I had seen the moon reflect those scars. He froze in his tracks, a true statue. The words rung true, and not even he could deny it. Now was my chance, it was now or never.
„Vincent. Let me be brief. You either escort me to Kalm, since you didn't fulfill the deal, and you never have to see me again. Or you don't, and I follow you around, forever. And you know you won't be able to shake me off." I said seriously. He turned his head and I could tell he was mulling over it. Finally he raised those blood red eyes and looked at me.
„If I concede to accompany you to Kalm, you promise, no, swear that you shall stop pestering me?" He asked. I nodded. Suddenly he surprised me by leaning in and grabbing me by the arm and pulling me up to his face.
„Do you swear?" I saw a dangerous glint in his eyes, and wondered why it was present; why was it so important for Vincent to get rid of me? He seemed almost desperate. I briefly wondered whether he loathed me that much. Or was it because hiding from the truth was an integral part of Vincent, yet I had raked it up just now; and both of us knew it would not be the last time.
„Ye-yes." Well, I suppose I would have to solve this before Kalm, I could tell the technique was getting frayed and overused. I was genuinely curious about all those scars by now. Vincent released me, and I rubbed the place where he had grabbed me. It wasn't that it hurt, no, Vincent would never hurt one of his teammates; it had simply surprised me.
„Well then, Yuffie, it seems as if luck is in your favour. We'll be reaching Costa del Sol in a few days, from where we can catch the ferry." He set off, not even looking at me. I sighed and trudged behind him. This mystery could be the death of me. But I was determined to get to the bottom of it.
* * *
I had hoped the atmosphere would lighten up as we went along, but no such luck. As we crossed the pass between Corel and the plains of Costa del Sol, the forebearing, melancholy mountains pervaded the mood. Vincent seemed to be brooding more than usual. Yes, and here I had thought it impossible for him to be any moodier.
Night found us trudging on the precarious trail. Oh all right, night found me trudging on the precarious trail. Vincent strode purposefully, untiring. I would have said energetically, if it hadn't been for the mere fact that this was Vincent. Vincent did not do „energetic".
Finally he seemed to take into account my persistent swearing at the whole world in general and he halted in front of a small fissure in the rock. He caught my eye, nodded with his head towards our soon to be shelter, alteast for the night, and dissappeared inside. I sighed and dragged myself into the hole. If I died from overexhaustion I'd come back and haunt Vincent. And if I was a ghost then it meant that I could go through walls, which meant that I could steal all the materia! Yes! Oh wait, ghosts can't hold solid objects, can they? Damn. Well I guess I could simply look at the materia…
My thoughts of the pros and cons of being a ghost were brushed aside by the primitive side of my brain when I thought of supper. My eyes grew twice their size and I swear I could have drooled. I suspiciously wiped my chin, just in case I did. I dropped my pack and collapsed beside it, stretching out my legs. I dug through it, searching for anything remotely edible.
Vincent was crouching in the middle of the small chamber, methodically lighting a fire. Hunched over, his hair spilling over his face, concealing it. Yet another reflex, isn't it Valentine? Not only do you hide yourself from the world, oh no, you take it one step further: you hide from yourself. Suddenly my hand stopped searching for the food as my mind discarded thoughts of eating.
„Why?" I voiced all my questions into one. Why do you torture yourself? Why do you hide? Why do mourn for something from the past? Why do you punish yourself for something you could not prevent? A million more hung in the air. Yet all were summed up into one word. But he blatantly ignored it.
„Why what Yuffie? If it is about the fire, then its quite obvious I would think; it gets cold at night, and therefore one should light a-„
„You know what I mean Valentine." I interrupted. It was true; there was no way he did not understand this question, especially because he always was perceptive.
„Yuffie…" He warned, yet I could feel the fatigue in that voice. I suppose that's what prodded me on; or perhaps it was my frustration, demanding to be let out.
„No! Answer it, why?" I demanded.
„Yuffie, you would not understand, you-„
„-have not sinned like I." I said simultaneously with him. His eyes widened slightly.
„I know you. I told you so. And you have not sinned more than me, so stop saying it!"
„No, you do not know what you are saying, you have not seen, no, in truth you have no idea." he said, trying to assure himself more than anyone else.
„I bloody well do!" I retorted angrily. „But that isn't why you won't tell me, is it? It's because you conceal it from yourself, isn't it? Because that way you don't have to think about it! No, you just go about your own way, blaming yourself the whole time for something that was completely out of your hands!" By now I had pushed myself up and crawled over to where he crouched. He turned his head, as if the very words stung.
„Yuffie, as I mentioned before, you do not know what you are saying."
„Lucrecia." One name, uttered coldly from my lips. His head whipped up, and his eyes posessed a dangerous glint.
„That past is not yours to bring up." He replied forecfully.
„I can bring up anything I damn well please! And I will bring it up. Open your eyes Valentine! The past was not your fault, there was nothing you could do about it! Hell, you said yourself that it was alright if she was happy, didn't you? Well then, maybe she was happy. Maybe that's the twisted individual she was. But you won't think of that, will you? Oh no, you couldn't. Because that would be a sin, wouldn't it? Even if it had been your fault, it was the past. You can't carry on living in it, it's useless. It won't change! It can't! All you're doing is being an idiot! Because it wasn't your fault!" I huffed, mad with rage. The words had spilled out of me, the bottle finally uncorked. Strange that I had known it all along, but had never thought about it before. Yet Vincent only glared at me with those eyes.
He stood up, saying, „I shall endure no more of this nonsense," as he stalked off into the night, swallowed instantly as he left the circle of meager light.
Fine Valentine, two could play at this game. I put out the fire violently as I huffed and turned away, all thoughts on food forgotten. In truth I felt like vomiting. I forcefully lay down, curling up and trying to fall asleep. Of course it was futile. The anger was boiling in my veins, churning restlessly, chasing away the mists of sleep.
I don't know how long exactly I lay there, twisting and turning in the dark. It was a long time when I finally stopped, convinced that sleep was most definitely avoiding me. Figures. I rolled over, telling myself most sternly that I would most definitely not look.
I looked.
He had returned. From what I could see of the way the light fell on his face I deemed it to be around midnight or so, when the moon hung full in the middle of the sky, surveying the world.
Surveying him.
I stood up, reclaiming my usual place in the shadows. He sat still as always, and my position was a favourable one, for I glimpsed all of his face. I could tell he had been running before, for some wisps of ebony had escaped the confines of the bandana and swung lazily in the breeze. Those eyes had been closed, the brows knitted together gently.
Oh Vincent, what battles do you wage inside?
Yet the eyes opened, revealing those scars, bleeding in the night. Had I done that? Had I reopened each scar meticulously, forced them to bleed silver tears of moonlight? But I knew it had to be done. For sometimes healing meant reopening old wounds, so they healed healthily.
I don't know what prompted me to do the following. Perhaps it was the most inner core of human nature, perhaps I thought I heard a call.
I cast no thought to it however, as I strode out of the shadows, leaving them behind. I stopped in front of him, falling to my knees. He looked surprised, and I saw no loathe in those eyes. Or maybe it was wishful thinking. But in one quick move I had thrown my arms around him, clutching tightly. He moved not a muscle.
„You know this is the part where you hug me back. Trust me, it isn't too complicated of a procedure." I said teasingly. Vincent remained silent, and I wondered whether I'd botched things up. No. Yuffie Kisaragi always prevails. Got to remember that. Also, what I had done, was doing, was not something I had thought of. It had come from somewhere within, the part that all humans posess: kindness.
Finally there was a rustle of fabric as he returned the embrace awkwardly.
Well, this was a new experience. Never been hugged by Vincent before. Not that I've been hugged often, mind you; I'm not really the cuddly type. Most likely you'll get a Conformer wedged up nicely where the sun don't shine if you try to hug me.
I wondered whether Vincent had ever embraced someone since then. Or did he lock himself away from this as well? Instinctively my hold tightened. No more words passed between us; there was no need for them. His hold tightened slightly as well, yet I did not look at him.
I stayed as the silence once again fell in deep layers. I stayed as the moon shone down, painting the world in ethereal shades. I stayed as the stars wheeled up above. I stayed clutching him tightly: offering friendship, a place to kindle pain, hope. But most of all, offering him life.
We moved not at all, instead like two statues. I did not let go even once, and the last I remember was a light, bluish gray sky before sleep arrived and claimed me like a small child.