Disclaimer: For those of you who haven't yet figured it out I'll spell it for you: I--D-O-N-O-T-O-W-N-M-I-D-D-L-E-E-A-R-T-H-O-R-I-T-S-C-H-A-R-A-C-T-E- R-S.

Rating: PG 13 you decide why

Thank you Oddwin for Reviewing again!! My brother wants to help me, but I won't let him, why: A) because I have his disc-man and he must never know. B) His humor sucks C) he thinks fan fiction is dumb D) He's my brother (duh!) I'm referring to every one as their mind names, so Pippin is the hobbit in Gandalf's body not Gandalf in Pippins body

2. The first reverse

Going through the mines was a long and painful process. Boromir was forced to care for Bill who didn't seem to understand the danger's of gravity. Pippin insisted on singing about every object that came into his head. All those now occupying a hobbit body found the feet incredibly awkward. Aragorn found the thousands of steps hard to deal with. Sam insisted on using Aragorn's sword as a walking stick. Frodo in his paranoia at having once lost the ring insisted that someone was following them. Worst of all Gimli and Legolas' feud had never ceased.

"No, no that is a cliff, can you say cliff.no, okay what about stupid.no, okay, fall how about fall. no, okay then try splat, can you say splat," Boromir urged Bill as he tittered on the edge of a long drop off.

"Rocks beautiful rocks, stairs never ending. funny mining stuff and even more rocks," Pippin sang in a horrible soprano that sounded like nails on a chalk board.

"Hey guys hurry up, we're nearly at the top," Sam egged on leaning on Aduriel.

"Huff, huff, guys.wait.up," Aragorn gasped as he stumbled up the ever climbing stairs, "Ahhh," he cried as his large foot caught on a step and he rolled down the five steps he had just come up.

"Frodo, Gandalf and Gimli where pushing Merry, well Legolas held his lead, Merry was perfectly willing to go up the steps, but his new body wasn't.

"There, didn't you guys hear that, someone yelled. I'm telling you something's following us," Frodo insisted as he gave the pony a push.

"That was Aragorn, calm down," Gandalf grimaced as he shoved Merry up two more steps.

"Hey Legolas, I think I just got a bit of horse dung on your old hair, oh there's a bit more," Gimli edged his companion on.

"Well I just ripped some of your beard off, so there," Legolas retorted wrenching a tuff of stiff brown hair from his chin. "Yeowww that hurt, next stop I'm brushing this mess out, or maybe I'll cut it all off."

"You wouldn't," cried Gimli.

"I so would," the former elf replied tugging Merry up the last step, "Hah, we're done with that nonsense."

"I have no memory of this place," Gandalf declared as three doors came into view.

"Easily solved," Pippin exclaimed. "Eany, meany, miny , moe." he began pointing at each of the doors.

"What are you doing, you can't do that, this is a quest not a birthday party!" Gandalf exclaimed.

"It is too a birthday party, today I turn twenty nine, not that anyone cared to notice." Pippin huffed as he sat down.

"Oh, sorry, um happy birthday!" Gandalf apologized as he settled himself down, "Could you hand me my pipe?"

Pippin reluctantly handed the pipe to the guide, "Are we lost?" he asked.

"No we are not lost!" Gandalf yelled at him taking the pipe.

"But I thought you said you didn't remember this place?"

"I don't, but I soon will," Gandalf growled as he light up.

"I think were lost." Pippin said quietly to Sam who had settled beside him.

"Quite, Gandalf's thinking." Sam retorted. "I'm hungry; let's see what in the packs."

Gandalf stared intently at the doors, ~eany, meany, miny, moe.~ He thought to himself.

"Ahhhh," Frodo screamed leaping up and running over to Gandalf, "There's something down there!!"

"It's Aragorn, relax," Gandalf consoled the ring bearer; he placed a comforting hand over Frodo's shoulder.

"Don't touch us!!" Frodo hissed bolting back to where he had been seated.

"Oookay then," Gandalf sighed returning to his door choosing. "Can you say lost. Bill say lost," Boromir urged the former pony.

"Cliff," Bill replied.

"Moe! It's that way guys," Gandalf cried out pointing to the right most passage. "I told you we weren't lost."

"Who's Moe?" Pippin asked halting his song.

"Moe's, um, err the dwarf who I was traveling with when I first came here, yeah," Gandalf recovered, herding the rest of the Fellowship through the door.

"Wow. guys. thanks. for waiting!" Aragorn huffed as he finally climbed the last step. "I think. I'll sit down. for a breather now. okay."

"No way, there's something following us, and if we don't get going, it's going to catch up," Frodo insisted pulling Aragorn to his feet and pushing him through the door.

They traveled for hours down a pathway that slowly made its way upward, Pippin's horrible racket echoed off the walls until Gandalf finally had the sense to gag him. Eventually they entered a vast room, "Let me risk a little more light," Gandalf said blowing on the shinning rock.

"Nooo, it will see us, it will know we're here!" Frodo wailed tackling the former wizard.

Sam and Gimli pried Frodo off and poured water over his head, "Come now, nothing following us, just relax, think of happy thoughts. there you go," Sam comforted.

"Behold the great realm of the dwarven city of Dwarrowdelf," Gandalf presented allowing the light to travel across the massive hall.

"You lived here? What a dump," Legolas whistled giving Gimli a provoking nudge.

"Never insult the Dwarrowdelf!" Gimli yelled tackling the former elf. The fight continued for several second till Legolas throw Gimli off him and into a small room off the great hall.

"Gimli!" Aragorn cried following him into the room. He saw Gimli crying at a stone tomb and ushered the others inside. Gandalf handed his staff and hat to his former body now occupied by a gagged Pippin before picked up a very old book. He begins to read.

"Hmm, sounds like they all died," he stated.

"How, how did they die?" Frodo asked voice quivering.

"Goblins," Gandalf informed him letting the book fall. Pippin let out a weak whimper and wonderd over to a well in the back of the room. He peered down before dropping Gandalf's hat down the hole; it fell bashing into things the whole way down, making enough noise to waken a deaf sloth. "Fool of a Took, next time throw yourself in and rid us of your stupidity!" Gandalf yelled at him before grabbing his staff.

"Wouldn't that kill your old body?" Sam asked as he moved about the room looking for any unspoiled rations. Gandalf gave him a withering stare.

Drums begin to beat, goblin cries echoed through the great hall.

"Goblins," Legolas cried readying an arrow.

"No duh." Gimli growled, readying his axe.

"Bar the door, bar the door!" Boromir wailed grabbing several large axes and sliding them through the two handles. Bill promptly crawled into a corner where he began to indistinguishably mutter the four letter words Boromir had been uttering all trip.

"Let them in, there is still one dwarf in Moria who still draws breath," Gimli urges.

"You're not a dwarf any more, I am and personally I say: keep them out!" Legolas replies under his breath letting an arrow fly, which pierced a goblin on the other side of the rotten door.

The goblins streamed in with inhuman cries. Aragorn leapt into the fray and began bashing Goblin heads with cooking gear. Sam started to spin holding Aragorn's blade before him, he killed several orcs, but also narrowly missed Boromir's head. Boromir unsheathed a glowing Sting and starts killing any goblin within a meter of Bills hiding place. Legolas and Gimli rapidly adapt to the movements of their new bodies and continue their feud well taking down many of the goblins. Gandalf managed to hack at the goblins feet while Merry begins to kick any goblin senseless who comes close enough. Pippin freed him self of the gag and throws the remainder of the goblins into a state of insanity with his singing. Frodo started running around like a maniac crying, "I told you so, I told you so!"

Suddenly a dark shape loomed in the doorway as a cave troll bashed his way into the fray. Pippin's tune grows more and more horrendous causing the cave troll to waste no time in fleeing from the sound. Pippin's song soon stop[ed as he runs out of lyrics, the stunned goblins begin to arise.

"To the Bridge of Kazad-dum!" Gandalf ordered. The Fellowship ran out of the room and down the Great hall. Goblins began to crawl out of every imaginable place. "Pippin we need more song!"

"I don't have any more," Pippin wailed as the goblins close in. A roar sounded in the distance and the goblins all ran.

"It's him, he's found us!" Frodo screamed and began to bolt

"What new devilry is this?" Boromir asked grabbing Frodo's belt.

"A Balrog, a demon of the ancient world, this foe is beyond any of you. run!" Gandalf replied as he fled down the rest of the hall, he was immediately followed by the others.

Gimli burst in front of the others, only to come to the edge of the path and face a steep drop off. Legolas grabbed a hold of him and pulled him back. "Don't you dare kill that body," Legolas hissed into Gimli's ear.

They continued to a stairway and begin to ascend it, but discovered the middle half was missing.

"Crap," Gimli swore before leaping across easily, followed by Sam. Pippin followed them; Merry leaped across the gap and skittered down several more steps before regaining his balance. Frodo grabbed Bill and together they jumped the space. Legolas grabbed Gandalf and flung him across the gap, Gandalf was caught by Gimli. Then Legolas attempted the space, but had forgotten his new bulk and nearly missed, Gimli put Gandalf down and grabbed hold of Legolas' beard, with which he pulled his friend in by.

"Oww, let go!" Legolas wailed, Gimli did, and Legolas began to fall again, but was immediately grabbed by Frodo who gave Gimli a disappointed glare.

Aragorn and Boromir where left on the other side as the stairs begin to crumble, "Here, let me, give you a boost," Aragorn offered shoving Boromir off the side. Boromir was towed in by the lead that held him to Bill. Aragorn mustered up all his courage and took a running leap across the gap, much to everyone's surprise he made it.

The Fellowship then continued to the bridge. They crossed it single file, Gandalf, then Bill, followed closely by Boromir, Frodo ran next. Legolas and Gimli crossed together, and nearly fell down the never ending gap in the process. Merry trotted across the gorge after them. Aragorn fled across, then Sam. Suddenly a creature emerged from the corridor behind Pippin who at the sight of the Balrog stalleed halfway across the pass. A faint squeal escaped the former hobbits lips as he begins to sweat uncontrollably.

"Come on Pippin, come on, we're nearly there," the others urged blocking Gandalf from rescuing his body.

"Let me through, I need to get through, haven't any of you read the book, I need to get through!" Gandalf cried out as the Balrog began to cross the bridge. As the foul beast placed his foot on the narrow stone pass, it crumbled. The Fire demon fell into the abyss, taking the stunned Pippin with him.

"Pippin," the fellowship wailed as their friend fell.

"Splat," offered Bill hopefully.

Arrows began to rain down upon them, as they made their way outside the mine. Merry fell to the ground and wept, as did the other former hobbits, Aragorn attempted to comfort them saying, 'Look, he was so stupid, it was bound to happen."

Gandalf began to mutter about the destruction of his old body, when suddenly a bright light began to shine from him.

"Nooo," Pippin cried out as he leaped up. "Oh, hello, was I dreaming?"

"Pippin, how the. what the, we thought you where dead." the former hobbits stuttered crowding around their friend.

"You killed Gandalf, you stupid imp," Aragorn yelled as he lifted Pippin up by the collar.

"I don't understand?" Boromir asked looking around confused at the others.

"When of us dies the switch between them and the person they held onto on Caradras is reversed. There for because of Pippin's stupidity, Gandalf is dead," Aragorn informed the senseless former man letting Pippin fall to the ground. "Soon these hills will be covered in goblins, we'd best get going."

Gimli eyes Legolas evilly, Legolas returns the stare. "That gives me an idea," Legolas cackled.

"Me too," Gimli replied as he reached for his axe.

"There will be no suicides, you two, so don't even try it." Aragorn ordered as he made his way down the mountain.

Sorry about that last bit, it wasn't too funny, but hey you try writing a death scene and making it laugh worthy. I'm sure this will answer a few of your questions, as well as give you some hints about future switches. Please review, I want to get better, and funnier.