Silence overcame the pandemonium leaving the slayer alone with the vampire. The soft glow that lit the caves was gone. Moonlight fell through an opening in the ceiling above Spike and made his pale skin look bluish. He looked like death.

Buffy reached out to catch the vampire's torn, bloody body as his bonds sprung open releasing their prisoner. Choked sobs came from Buffy as she carefully picked up the dead vampire. Ignoring the mess around her, the slayer slowly made her way through the dark caverns and out into the night.

The night air cooled her hot, wet cheeks. Moments of her and Spike flashed through her head in a torrent of muted pictures. Spike and Buffy patrolling. Spike and Buffy fighting. Spike's face when he had seen Buffy for the first time after she clawed her way out of her own grave. Spike's tears as he told her he loved her.

Xander and Willow saw Buffy come out of the caves and they ran to her. They had lost Buffy in the maze of caves and fled when the shaking started. Willow had wanted to go back in to help Buffy but Xander had held her back saying the caves were going to collapse.

Willow now watched helplessly as a torrent of tears rushed down her friend's face. Buffy seemed to just stare into space and never recognized Willow or Xander. It was as if she was alone. Just her and Spike.

Xander rushed to Buffy's side and stared sadly at Spike's body. Xander's heart leapt to his throat as he searched for something to say. He fought back tears and wanted to hug her, but he knew she wouldn't want to be touched.

Together the friends silently started for home. Christmas suddenly seemed so far away to them. The joys of the season and jolly smiles had quickly faded a long time ago and it seemed as if the whole word had stopped spinning to allow the slayer and her friends to mourn their dead. Spike may have been a vampire-a demon-but he was a part of them, a piece of their precious existence. Now he was gone forever.

***

Buffy's thoughts collided in her head as the hot tears burned her cheeks and landed on her now soaked jacket. Only one thought was clear and it raged in her mind. He got his soul for me. Buffy knew what she had to do.

Buffy led her friends to the cemetery where she had patrolled so many times with Spike. It seemed empty now--empty with death. Buffy slowly turned to her friends. I have to do this alone. I owe it to him.

Xander nodded in understanding but Willow looked confused.

From dust to dust. Xander looked at the dead vampire in his friend's arms and finally let the tears flow. You were the biggest pain in my ass, Xander broke down, and I'm going to miss you more than you could ever imagine, man! Xander turned and started home, sobs sounding in his throat.

Willow watched Xander leave and reluctantly she followed leaving Buffy alone like she has requested. It took a few minutes before Willow realized what was happening. From dust to dust. Willow stopped and started backing away from Xander who, knowing what Willow would do, turned to try and stop her. His face was soaked in tears.

Will, she has to do it.

Willow shook her head in defiance.

She has no other choice.

No! She can't! Not after--! Willow caught herself and looked at Xander.

Xander gave her a warning look. What did you do?

Nothing! I-I just sent the power back into him! That's all--I swear!

Xander stared at his friend for a second. What difference does that make? When she stakes him, the power will be gone forever. Will, Buffy just lost the one man she would have spent the rest of her life with. She needs closure--she needs to make her peace. Let her put the past behind her for once--no surprises! She deserves that much.

Willow's gaze fell to the ground. There's one.

Xander couldn't believe what he was hearing. Buffy's best friend, who had already pulled her from what she had claimed to be Heaven, was talking about destroying Buffy again in a way that would kill the Buffy he knew so well, this time for good.

Willow looked back up at Xander. It's a long shot, but at least there's hope! The power is in him, Xander, and hopefully so his is soul. If his soul still exists, it could still tame the power--it would take some time to fill his body again but--

Will what are you saying? Xander was afraid he already knew.

Xander, Spike might now be human and alive. Buffy's going to kill him!

Xander looked at Willow for a short second then started running. He had to stop Buffy!

***

Buffy had watched Willow catch up to Xander before she turned and slowly walked towards the crypt. She thought about the nights she had spent with Spike there. She thought of the times she had fought with him there. They had come a very long way. It was fitting that it was finished there.

The crypt came into view and Buffy hoped that, for Clem's sake, there were no other demons or vampires living there. It was Spike's crypt. It was Spike's home.

Solemnly she pushed the door open with her foot and stood in the doorway for a second, staring into the dark crypt before stepping inside. Even in the dark she could see that it was the same as Spike had left it. Clem must have left thinking Spike wasn't ever coming back. Buffy was slightly surprised that Clem didn't decide to take it over as his own place.

Buffy carried Spike down to the lower part of the crypt where she gently placed him on his bed. With a sob she softly kissed his forehead. Kneeling beside the bed, the slayer held the vampire's hand tight. Wracked with sobs she wished she hadn't been so mean to him.

I love you, she sobbed. I love you so much! I do now! But I have to do this. I owe it to you. You've done so much for me and I could never repay you--I know that. I just wish I could have told you. If I could have, I would have died for you. Buffy whispered partly to herself, partly to the vampire laying on the bed in front of her. She meant every word.

Buffy sighed a shuddering sigh and pulled a stake out of her jacket pocket. She leaned over and kissed him on the lips one last time before closing her eyes and gripping the stake. Slowly she raised the stake in her shaky hand. I'll never forget you, Spike.

***

Xander and Willow reached the crypt in time to see Buffy open the door and step out. She fell to her knees on the soft grass and wept. Her hand let go of something which fell to the grass next to her.

Xander whispered as he stopped short of Buffy and watched her from a few paces away.

Willow stopped next to Xander and stared at the grass next to Buffy with unbelief. Cradled in the short green stalks lied a wooden stake.

We're too late. Willow breathed.

Xander sobbed quietly. They were always too late.

***

When the three friends finally arrived home, their somber faces told the story without words. Dawn fell to her knees and cried her heart out. Buffy rushed to her sister's side and knelt hugging her. The sisters cried together. Anya fell into the armchair and stared at the sisters with unbelief. Tears began to fall down her cheeks. Xander rushed to her and the ex-lovers sobbed into each other's shoulders.

Willow stood and watched as everyone held each other and cried. Suddenly she missed Tara so much. A pain ran through her chest. She gasped and fell to the floor sobbing. She knew how Buffy felt and even though she was a powerful witch, she was helpless for herself and for Buffy.

Eventually the group of friends merged together and sat in the middle of the living room holding each other. No on spoke, they just held each other afraid to let go in case something happened to another one of them. All they had left was each other.