Author's Note: Sorry this one took so long! Such is the life of a college student…blah! Anyway, I skip a few years in this one…I know that can get somewhat annoying, but I know that it can get even MORE annoying if a story drags on for too long. So here it is!
Disclaimer: See previous chapters…
~Chapter 5~
Summer of 1981
Lupin Manor
*CRACK*
A shallow intake of breath could be heard as the whip made contact with human flesh.
*CRACK*
This time the sting of the whip was accompanied by a snarling voice. "What did you think you were doing? --luring Sebastian Snape's boy to that poor excuse for a holding cell? You thought it would be funny? You thought that it would make your so-called friends like you more?"
*CRACK*
The whip hit again as the voice continued to swear at him, curse him, damn him. "What does a beast like you need with friends? NO ONE can love, let alone STAND, an abomination like you. Filthy, disgusting MONSTER!"
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
By now the once youthful looking back was no more than a mangled mess of blood and flesh. Usually Justin Wallace stayed as far away from his nephew as possible, hating the mere sight of him. The news of the "attack," however had changed his view on things. He decided that the monster's little trick deserved a lesson, and he assured Sebastian Snape that his son's near death encounter would not go unpunished.
So, here he was, in the small, metal shack that he'd had built as soon as he'd moved in five years ago. Small, metal, SILVER shack. It drove the beast crazy. Even though his darling nephew had more control over his mental, emotional, and physical reactions to any and all situations than anybody he'd ever seen in his entire life, he knew that silver drove all werewolves crazy. It was his way of showing the monster who had the power.
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
"Why my sister didn't put you down the moment you were changed is beyond me. I told her you'd be nothing but trouble, but she couldn't bear to watch her 'baby boy' die. If it weren't for the memory of my sister and her love for you, you'd have been dead the day after they were buried."
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
The words were nothing new. He'd heard them all before, just not like this. His uncle had never physically harmed him. The shock of it all was enough to numb him from the pain…the physical pain anyway. Mentally, he'd learned to tune out the words, to deal with the emotions that came along with actually understanding their meanings. Nine years of hearing hatred and disgust thrown at you would do that.
So, he just laid there, on his stomach, letting his uncle beat him to his heart's content, never once questioning whether this was wrong, or dangerous. It hadn't even occurred to him that the full moon would be rising in thirty minutes. It hadn't occurred to him that the wolf would probably do a real number on himself considering the amount of pain the animal would be feeling with the wounds on his back, the discomfort and fear from the surrounding silver, and the rage of being denied his frie…freedom.
No, none of that had occurred to him yet. All he could do was lay there, and wince with each…
*CRACK*
…of the whip.
It didn't cross his mind to be angry. He hadn't even once considered it an option. It never occurred to him that it wasn't fair, that it hadn't been his fault, his idea. Snape's near death experience hadn't been his doing. He knew it, he realized it somewhere in the back of his mind, but he couldn't help but rationalize it, to twist it so that all the blame came back to him.
If he hadn't fought with James, if he hadn't said the things he'd said, if he hadn't accused Sirius…If, if, and more ifs. Sirius was right, it hadn't been any of his business. James and Lily were James and Lily, he, Remus Lupin, played no part in that relationship. He'd had no right to interfere the way he had.
So, James was cheating on Lily, so what? It wasn't as if he had any part in the affair. He should have minded his own bloody business, turned his back on what was happening, like the others had. It wasn't as if he didn't have anything to keep him occupied. He had Arabella. But NO, BELLA had to be the one that pointed out that a TRUE friend would talk to James…for…for both their sakes; Lily's AND James'.
So, he'd done what he knew, in his deepest of hearts, to be the "right" thing.
"You FANCY her don't you?! That's the only reason why you're threatening him! You WANT the two of them to break it off so that you can have a go at it!"
Sirius' accusations weren't wholly without base. Yes, he had loved Lily at one time. Yes, in a way he still did. And, yes, it hurt him to wonder: had he asked her to the Halloween Ball first, before James had, would he be in James' place right now?
"What are you talking about, Padfoot? I'm not trying to do anything of the sort…I'm doing this as a true friend…to Lily, and to James."
Of course he'd denied it; what else could he have done without looking like a backstabbing bastard? And of course, Sirius being Sirius, took the words in the one way that Remus hadn't intended. The stupid git had taken it as a challenge, an accusation.
"So you're saying that I'M not a good friend, is that it?! You're accusing me of not CARING about those two?! Who are YOU to accuse me of being a bad friend?!"
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"I'm not the one that's been dishonest before! You're ENTIRE life is based on a lie! And you have the gaul to preach to us about being honest? What kind of bloody friend are you? Not only did you lie to us about your lycanthrope, you hide the fact that you're in love with Lily every day…and DON'T deny it, I've seen the way you look at her…You want her for yourself, and THAT'S why you're doing this. It's not because of some need to do good, or to save their relationship, or to be fair to both of them…it's because you want a chance at what they have. Your own selfish desires…"
"Selfish desires? Are you questioning my loyalties?"
Of course Sirius would know what buttons to press. Both of them having, to a certain extent, canine blood flowing through them, the question of loyalty was a very sensitive matter.
"Are you questioning mine?"
Oh, the tension in that room could have suffocated anyone. This conversation turned argument turned fight, was no longer between James and Remus, it was between the two canine members of the quartet. It was between Sirius and Remus, Padfoot and Moony.
"And what if I am?"
That was definitely NOT the best thing to say, but it seemed right. Somehow, backing down hadn't seemed an option at all in the heat of the moment. In retrospect it didn't surprise him at all that Sirius reverted to physical violence after the challenge.
Had he seen the fist coming he would have ducked, but there had been no time. Needless to say, in a matter of seconds, he'd found himself sprawled on the floor, rubbing his bruised jaw. Although it was quite uncomfortable, it had been exactly what he'd needed to wake him up from the blind fit of emotions he'd been in.
"You always were better with your fist then with your brain, you know that, Black?"
He'd kept his voice perfectly calm as he got up and brushed himself off. He knew that there were many traits about him that drove Sirius up the wall, but his ability to remain calm in the most stressful of situations had to be the kicker. So, he remained calm, using Sirius' last name to address him, knowing full well that Sirius realized he did that only when he was especially cross with him.
It shouldn't have surprised him at all that his friend had said nothing; just standing there with the flame of anger raging in his eyes. In retrospect, again, it didn't surprise him that Sirius stormed out of the room the way he had; all piss and wind like normal. But no matter what, he NEVER could have predicted what the boy had done next.
Yes, he'd questioned Sirius' loyalty. No, he hadn't meant it. This was one of the only times in his life he'd said something he didn't mean. He knew that it would push his friend, and he did it, all the same. He just never would have imagined that it would get Sirius so angry that he'd try and make a murderer out of him.
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
*CRACK*
The sound of his uncle's voice brought him back to reality. "Take a look at the sunset, Remus…" This had to be the only time his uncle had ever addressed him by his real name. Out of sheer shock, he obeyed. The two of them stared at the blood red sky for a few moments, and when Justin started to speak again, his voice was cold, cruel, and snarling. "This will be the last one you will see."
Remus watched as the man got up and left, shutting the door tightly and putting the locking spell in place. He had little time to consider the man's cryptic words before the change started taking place, but through the blinding pain, and quite possibly due to it, he realized that his uncle didn't mean to open the doors again, at least not while he was alive.
***
James Potter stood at his drawing room window and watched as the sun set, slowly. It had been two full days since the transformation, and still there was no word from his friend. For four summers now a system had been formed: for the three full moons that Remus had to endure alone, he'd write each one of his friends immediately afterwards, telling them that all was well, and that he was indeed alive. The last bit there was due to the presence of his uncle.
Justin Wallace.
An involuntary shudder ran through his body when he recollected some of the things his parents had told him about the man. He was, for lack of a better word, cruel and flat out inhumane to any and all dark creatures. Of course his own parents had been a bit shocked that a werewolf would be allowed into Hogwarts, but after having been reminded of the gentle and sweet countenance that Remus possessed all doubts and fears of their son's safety were put to rest.
In fact the Potters were downright fond of Remus. They went the extra mile of inviting him over to their house as often as they could over the summer, but Remus being Remus, would often decline the invitation, saying that he didn't want to be a burden on them.
A grin spread on his face as he thought of the system the Potters and Blacks had come up with. Every summer at least one of the families would stay at home to make sure that all was right at Lupin Manor. This year it was the Black's turn, but due to recent events James' parents, and James himself, had thought it best to stay at home.
"James! Sweetheart! Come and have dinner!" He gave one last worried look at the setting sun before walking over to the dining room. "James," his mother continued as he took a seat at the table, "if you're that worried about him, why don't you pop on over and give him a ring? Tell that uncle of his that you were in the neighborhood, and decided to stop by for a visit? Maybe bring him over afterwards so that we can tend to his…injuries…"
James had no time to reply. In a flash of blue smoke a small house elf appeared, floating in front of the Potters. "Mindy?" James had met her once, but he would recognize the little creature anywhere. "What are you doing here?"
"James Potter must excuse Mindy…Mindy didn't mean to interrupt Mr. Potter from eating…"
"No, it's alright, Mindy. What's the matter? Is there something wrong with Remus?" James' concern grew ten fold when the small elf burst out into tears.
"Master Wallace will not let young Master Lupin out of the silver room!" she wailed as the tears started to form a small puddle in the middle of the Potter's table.
"What?!" James' father jumped up at the mention of a silver room. "Mindy, what do you mean?"
When it was clear that the elf was in no condition to speak just yet James' mother stood up and took her by the hand and led her to a seat in front of all three of them. "Now, Mindy, please calm down and tell us what happened," Lorna Potter said in a soothing voice.
They all waited patiently as Mindy calmed herself. ~She has got to be one of the most level headed house elves I have ever met,~ James thought with a smile. ~Well, like Master, like Elf.~
"After Master Lupin died, Master Wallace built a silver room to put young Master Lupin in when he…" she hesitated for a moment, fearing the mere words.
"Yes, Mindy…we understand…but are you sure it's SILVER? How do you know?" Joseph Potter demanded.
"Oh! Mindy is sure, Mr. Potter! Mindy is VERY sure! Young Master Lupin does no go near it on any other day! Master Lupin is AFRAID of it!"
Lorna leaned back in her chair as the detail settled in. "SILVER? James, did you…?"
"NO!" James jumped up from his seat and started pacing angrily. "No, he never once mentioned it!…Damn it, Remus, you stupid git!"
"Oh, Mr. Potter must not be mad with Master Lupin! Oh! This is all MINDY'S FAULT!" They watched in horror as the small thing began bashing her head against the wall.
"Min-Mindy! Stop it!" Joseph grabbed hold of her and set her down on the chair again. "Now, tell me what do you mean by Wallace not letting Remus out?"
"He WON'T! The day after…Mindy asked when Master Wallace was going to let Master Lupin out so Mindy could take care of him. He told Mindy that he wasn't going to!" she wailed as the waterworks started up again.
"WHAT?!" all three Potters jumped up immediately.
"James, go call a healer…if they refuse, call on Madame Pomfrey, GO!"
James ran to the fireplace immediately after his parents vanished with a "POP!" He knew that it would be no use in trying to call on a normal healer to deal with a werewolf, so he skipped right to Madame Pomfrey. It took a while to find her, but when he did and had explained the situation to her, she told him that she'd be there as soon as possible.
It seemed only natural to call on Lily and Peter to let them know what had happened, and soon after he found himself pacing the his family's drawing room with Lily by his side, Madame Pomfrey sitting by the fire waiting, and Peter nervously chewing his bottom lip.
"You didn't call Sirius?" Lily asked gently, knowing that this was still a very sensitive issue. A simple, mumbled, "no" was her only answer. "You know," she started again after taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, "he does have a right to know, Jim…"
"No, he doesn't." James' blue eyes were jumping with a flame that Lily had never seen before. "He lost all right whatsoever the minute he did what he did."
Lily sighed as her shoulders slumped in defeat. "You know he didn't mean it, James…you, above all, know Sirius…he never thinks things through…"
"Yeah, well, maybe he should have thought this one time before he went ahead and told Snape about the Whomping Willow…"
Anything more that Lily could have said was silenced at the sound of people apparating. The entire party leapt up at once and ran to the corridor. "Oh my God," was all any of them could say as they stared at Joseph Potter holding a bloody, beaten, and barely breathing Remus in his arms.
"POPPY! We need your help!" Joseph yelled as he carried the boy into one of the guest rooms.
Madame Pomfrey shook herself out of her shock and mentally prepared herself for what she was about to see. "Why don't you three stay here? The last thing I need is for you to get in the way."
The three teens stood there and watched her hurry down the hall after the elder Potters. "James, Sirius NEEDS to know," Lily whispered as the three of them made their way back to the drawing room.
Mutely, James just nodded before heading over to the fireplace. He threw a handful of Floo Powder into the jumping flames before stepping inside. "Netherfield Manor," he called out clearly. A few moments later he found himself stumbling out of the Blacks' main fireplace.
"James, what brings you here?" Elizabeth Black asked with a pleasant smile. It soon disappeared when she saw the look on his face. "What's happened, James?"
"It's Remus…He…His uncle…"
He didn't need to say the words for the Blacks to understand what he was trying to say. "Is he alright?" Edmund Black demanded as the two aurors shot up and grabbed their cloaks and wands.
James just shook his head grimly. "Sirius has gone out for a walk…I know that you haven't been on the best of terms with him, but would you mind waiting for him and…" Elizabeth asked gently.
"Sure."
"Thank you."
After about thirty minutes of pacing back and forth, from window to window, it was clear that Sirius wasn't planning on coming back any time soon. So, James did the only thing that came to mind: he left a note.
When he stumbled back out of his fireplace he found that Lily and Peter were still sitting where he'd last left them. "So, where is he?" Lily asked as she jumped up and hugged him.
"I was going stir crazy waiting for him, so I left him a note. Told him to come over as soon as he could…Is there any word on Moony yet?"
Lily shook her head. "The Blacks left for their offices, said something about trying to find something to get Justin Wallace sent away to Azkaban or something like that…They said that the child abuse charge wouldn't work because of the fact that Remus is a werewolf…"
"Bloody HELL! So you're telling me that, that man could get away with murder?!" James started pacing angrily again. He sighed and slumped into a chair. "It's just not fair, is it?" he mumbled as he looked up at his girlfriend and his fellow Marauder.
Lily gave him a weak smile as she took a seat next to him. "No, it's not…" she whispered as she started to rub his back soothingly. She heard him sigh as he leaned his head on her shoulder.
"I don't want to loose him," James whimpered.
Lily sniffled back the tears that were starting to form. "We won't," she stated firmly. "We won't."
***
The fact that his mother wasn't there to give him a death look the moment he stepped into the house should have been the first sign that something was off. The fact that his father wasn't going on about loyalty, friendship, and anger management should have been the second sign. But of course being as thick headed as he was, the realization that something was terribly wrong didn't hit him until he saw the small note sitting on the dining table with his name in James' untidy handwriting scrawled across the front.
For a moment he just stood there, staring at it, as if it would jump out and attack him at any moment, and then he couldn't help but feel a certain sense of dread growing within the pits of his stomach. At the end of the summer James had made it quite clear that he was to have nothing to do with him until school started.
"I need to have some time away from you, Sirius. I really don't want to deal with you until I absolutely have to…so, stay away from me…and from Remus…"
Never in his life had he believed that he'd ever hear those words coming from James. He'd lost two good friends in one night. TWO. Not only James, but Remus as well.
GOD!
Why was he SUCH an idiot?! Why couldn't he just THINK every once in a while? He shuddered at the thought of what would have happened had James not seen Snape enter the Whomping Willow. Snape would be dead…which wasn't too bad…but REMUS…Remus would have been executed. His best friend could have been killed for something that he, Sirius Black, had done. Even if he was innocent, the Ministry wouldn't have cared, they'd have just taken the opportunity to rid the world of another "Dark Creature."
The Minister of Magic had been stern faced, but he'd seen the hidden delight in the man's eyes. Justin Wallace was outwardly pleased at ridding himself of his burden. Dumbledore had called him into his office after the whole incident, and given him a stern speech about why it had been wrong and the normal teacher talk. McGonagall had said the same exact thing, just louder. His parents had yelled at him, his mother sent him a howler, his father grounded him for…basically the rest of his life. James had shunned him, Peter had followed, Lily glared at him at every opportunity, but had eventually softened up when she'd seen his misery, and Remus…
Well, Remus hadn't really done anything. He'd become more secluded since it happened, like he'd been at the beginning of their first year. The look of him, though, the moment after the whole ruckus, was still burned into his memory. There was no anger, no spite, no bitterness. There wasn't even any fear or mistrust. It was just emptiness. Remus' usually expressive face had been, for once, completely passive and blank. It'd been…unnerving at the very least to see sweet, kind, gentle Remus look so empty…so…broken.
Why?
Why was it that no matter what he did, it was always Remus. Always. It never failed: he'd do something stupid, and Remus would always suffer for it. In most cases it was stupid things, like getting detention. But the biggest mistakes he'd made always resulted in a very hurt Moony. Their second year when he'd gotten scared and talked James and Peter into not being Remus' friends anymore because of the boy's lycanthrope. That had been his biggest mistake up until that point, and for another four years afterwards. Then this had to happen. He had to be stupid again. He had to let his temper get the best of him.
Yes, Remus had pushed his buttons a bit too hard this time. Yes, it'd pissed him off that Remus was right about what a true friend would do. Yes, he hadn't been in the mood to deal with Snape at that moment in time. Yes, he'd been perfectly "sane" when he'd told the greasy git how to get past the Whomping Willow. And yes…he'd seen some sort of sick, twisted logic in what he'd done.
Remus had insulted him, hurt him by challenging his position as James' right hand man. In animal form, in the pack of Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, Moony was leader. Moony outranked Padfoot. But in James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter, Sirius was the one that outranked Remus. He'd broken that bond of loyalty there: the one that existed between Remus and Sirius, Moony and Padfoot. The bond that stated neither of them would ever challenge each other in that way.
Remus had done that, and it'd angered him. Hurt and angered him, and like most other times in his life, he'd acted out of pure enraged passion, rather than logic. And of course, like most other times, it had led him to nothing but trouble. He'd lost all his good friends because of one STUPID mistake. He'd lost the trust of his best friend of 16 years because of his quick temper. James hadn't talked to or made contact with him once within the last two months other than to tell him to stay away, and yet, here it was: the letter.
It was about Remus, he knew it; he could feel it. Something wasn't right with his packmate, his friend. He wasn't honestly expecting the usual letter from Remus, but he'd hoped that, maybe, his friend would send him one anyway. The full moon had been three days ago, and there was no letter from Moony. Instead here was this letter from James, written quickly, from the looks of it, and there was no doubt in his mind that it pertained to Moony.
With a shaking hand he reached out cautiously, picked it up, and started reading:
Dear Padfoot,
I know that we haven't been on the best of terms since…well…since…you know when…but…something's happened…to Moony. I can't explain right now, but come over as soon as you get this letter.
Sirius…it doesn't look good at all. Just hurry.
-Prongs
Without another thought, he jumped up, grabbed his wand and sprinted to his family's fireplace. "Pemberley Manor!" Within a few seconds he saw the Potter's living room materialize in front of him. Up until then, he'd acted out of pure passion, but as reason returned to him, he started wondering if he should just turn back.
"Sirius?"
~Too late,~ he thought to himself as he turned to see Lily standing before him.
"You were going to leave, weren't you?" she asked gently as she pulled him out of the fireplace.
All he could do was give a weak nod while he awkwardly looked around the familiar, yet foreign room. It seemed forever since he'd been there. It had been forever since he'd been there. "How…how is he?" He didn't even realize he'd asked the question until Lily started speaking to him.
"Madame Pomfrey says that he should be alright…barring all complications that is…" Lily stopped walking and turned to look at him. Her eyes sparkled with the tears she was trying to told hold back, and he knew that his own eyes were a mirror image of them, only in blue. "I know…I know that we haven't…I haven't been the best friend that I could have been, Sirius. I know that it must have been horrible for you these past few months, but you have to see what…"
"Lily, if I hadn't been the one that did it, I probably would have killed the bloke that did do it to Remus…I don't blame you or the others…for any of it."
Lily gave him a tearful smile. "You're a very, very decent man, Sirius; a very good man…despite what anybody says. Never forget I told you that."
"I'll remember it always…"
The two of them quieted down as they neared the room where Remus was staying in. "Jim's in there now…and so's Peter. I think that maybe the Marauders should have little chat?" Lily pushed with a small smile. Her smile grew into a grin when she saw Sirius' eyes widen in shock. "Oh don't give me that look. I've known about the lot of you for years…" Sirius just stared at her for another moment before giving a slight shrug, popping into his Animagus form, and trotting off into the bedroom. "Okay, THAT I didn't know…" She took one last look at her friend before turning to walk away.
After watching Lily walk off, Padfoot cautiously nuzzled the door open to find the room empty. ~I guess Lily was wrong,~ he thought to himself as he quietly padded inside to take a look. The first thing he noticed was the coppery scent of blood in the air mixed with about a dozen different potions. ~God, Moony, what did he do to you?~ With a whimper he bounded the rest of the way to the bed and came to a stop where Remus' hand rested.
A whine escaped him as he nuzzled the hand with his wet nose, and without a second thought he jumped onto the bed next to his fallen pack mate. Gently he snuggled up next to Remus, offering him some extra warmth and comfort, and worked it so that the boy's hand was resting on the scruff of his neck. It wasn't much, and given the fact that he usually found himself in a state of verbal constipation when admitting he was wrong, this was the best that he could do by ways of an apology. Now all he could do was hope that Moony and Remus accepted it.
