Before I Wake To Find You Gone

By: General Quistis (samaralockheartshinra@yahoo.com) and Zhakeena (zhakeena@yahoo.com)

Disclaimer: We don't own anything but the story plot. Gyah! Any resemblance to any other plots is purely coincidental…

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

            Yuffie turned to the door once she heard it open. "You guys are back already?" she asked as Cloud, Barret and Tifa entered the house.

"Vincent isn't home." Tifa explained with a disappointed look on her face.

Yuffie blinked. "I thought he knows that you're coming over?" she asked.

"Maybe he forgot or something," Cloud explained as he sat down on the couch, sighing heavily.

"That foo's not in the ShinRa Mansion… wonder where he went…" Barret said as he leaned against the wall.

Yuffie switched off the television and turned to them. "It's so unlikely for Vincent to just forget about visitors…" she said.

From the kitchen, they heard Aerith's voice calling for them, "Dinner's ready!"

Cloud was the first one to run to the kitchen.

"You guys missed the news today. Some girl's been found washed up in the Junon Harbor and Rufus took her here in Midgar," Yuffie announced.

Tifa blinked. "A girl?" she asked.

"Yeah." Yuffie replied.

"What does she look like?" Barret asked.

"She's very pretty. Green eyes… brown hair… her green eyes are somewhat like Sephiroth's. *shudder* Creepy!" Yuffie explained.

Cloud pondered on Yuffie's words. "Hmm… If I remember correctly, that sounds like…. Nope, I don't think so…" he thought out loud.

Aerith looked at him curiously. "You're saying something, Cloud?" she asked.

"Aerith… did you watch the news too? You know, coz I think I might know that lady…" Cloud asked.

"Uhm… I think her name wasn't revealed yet by the media," she replied as she sat down beside Cloud.

Tifa and the others got inside the kitchen and took their seats.

"So what happened to your @#$%^%$ visit to the @#$%^%$ ShinRa Mansion a.k.a. the Haunted House?" Cid asked.

"Vincent's not home," Barret replied with an annoyed look on his face.

Marlene was staring at Cid, then turned to Tifa. "Miss Tifa, what is @#$%^%$?" she asked with an innocent look on her face.

Cloud spit out some water on Tifa's face due to surprise since unfortunately, she was seated facing him.

Barret almost choked.

Cid froze and just turned away.

Aerith's mouth dropped open and her eyes were wide, staring at Marlene.

Yuffie covered her mouth to stop herself from snickering.

"Oh… YUCK! Cloud?!?" Tifa got up and went to the sink to clean herself up.

"Ugh… sorry…" Cloud replied with a sheepish look on his face.

Aerith was covering her mouth in awe as she stared at Marlene unbelievably.

"Did I say something bad?" Marlene asked.

"Uhm… just don't say that ever again, Marlene…" Barret stammered.

"Why? Is @#$%^%$ a bad word?" she asked.

"Doh!" Barret smacked his forehead.

"Yes." All of them replied.

"What makes it bad then?" she asked.

Nobody knows how to answer the question.

"Hey! What makes it a bad word?!" she demanded again.

"The meaning makes it a bad word," Tifa reasoned as she sat down again.

"What's the meaning?" Marlene asked.

"Just eat…" Aerith said with a weak smile on her face.

To change the subject, Cid just spoke up, "So, why would you guys wanna see that Vincent again?" he asked.

"I don't know about Cloud. It's Cloud's idea really," Tifa replied, eyeing Cloud with an annoyed look on her face, still not forgetting about him spitting out water at her.

"Why, what happened?" Aerith asked.

"It's really personal. Can't say it now." Cloud replied before he proceeded to slice his steak.

***

            Rufus was eating his dinner with Lucrecia and Vincent.

"So, Vincent… tell me. You were a Turk before?" Rufus started.

"Yes, President Rufus," Vincent replied.

"What year?" he asked.

Vincent stopped eating and pondered for a while. He just smiled sheepishly at Rufus. "I'd rather not say it." He said.

Rufus chuckled lightly. "Fine."

Silence.

"How long have you known Professor…" Rufus turned to Lucrecia, meaning to trigger something in her as he mentioned the name, "Hojo,"

She dropped her fork to the floor accidentally. "Oh… Er…. Excuse me?" she asked.

A servant got her a new one and handed it to her. "Sorry about that," she mumbled.

Vincent frowned slightly. "As far as I can remember, he was already working for ShinRa when I was still a Turk… he was with… Professor Gast and… Lucrecia… working with the Jenova Project. I was the one who accompanied them…" he had this hopeful look on his face, thinking that maybe as he narrated this, Lucrecia could finally remember something.

But it was useless.

"Professor Gast?" Lucrecia asked.

Or so he thought.

"You remember him?" Vincent asked hopefully.

She thought for a while, seeing an image flash in her mind, but it faded away so quickly. "I… I don't know…" she replied.

Rufus sighed. "Are you sure? Try to think a little bit harder."

"What for? What's… what's the significance of… of all of those questions that you're asking me?" she snapped with a frown on her face, touching her forehead. It was already aching.

Nobody spoke for a few moments. Then, "I don't think this is the right time for this… We'll try again at another time," Rufus said.

Lucrecia shook her head as she got up from her seat and left the room.

Vincent was about to follow her but Rufus stopped him with a verbal reprimand, "Let her go, Valentine. Elena will attend to her,"

Vincent froze in his seat and turned to face Rufus. "Why are you doing this for us anyway, Rufus?"

"President Rufus," he corrected, "And… it's not like I'm not allowed to help you both, right?" Rufus said with a glint of something in his eyes. What the something was, Vincent wasn't sure.

"Yes, but it's not like… uhm…"

"Not like doing this would do something for me. Do you honestly think I'm that selfish, Valentine?" he smirked. "Besides, you two were from ShinRa… there are things that maybe you two could clear up for me. I do not know my own company completely yet. Especially its past…" he continued with a sly look on his face before taking a sip of white wine.

"You can go downstairs in Hojo's lab if you want to know everything." Vincent snapped before standing up. "Excuse me, President Rufus." He said before proceeding to exit.

The moment Vincent got out, Rufus remained seated, smiling slyly as he stared at his wine glass. "Hmf… Strife's right… I can't do this alone…" he muttered before reaching for his mobile phone and started to dial some numbers.

***

            "Get that!" Barret called out from inside the bathroom.

"You've been hogging the bathroom for 3 hours already! I need to use it!" Tifa snapped impatiently as she jumped up and down. She really needed to go.

"Answer the friggin' phone first!" he replied from inside.

"Grrr…" Tifa marched to the living room and saw Yuffie there, watching TV with Marlene and Cloud. "Why aren't any of you answering the phone?" she asked in disbelief.

"Too busy." Cloud muttered.

Tifa twitched and just grabbed the receiver to answer the call. "Yeah, what?" she demanded angrily.

***

            Rufus raised an eyebrow when he heard the voice. "Ooh… angry." He thought while trying to stop himself from smiling.

"Hello, good evening, miss. May I please speak with Mister Cloud Strife?" he asked with a suave tone as he flipped his hair with his other hand.

***

            Tifa raised an eyebrow. "Who's this?" she asked impatiently before turning to Cloud, giving him an it's-for-you look.

***

            "If I say my name, she might think that I'm up to something… oh well…" Rufus thought as he shrugged. "Rufus." He told her.

***

            Tifa thought for a while before handing the receiver to Cloud. "It's some guy named Rufus. Some friend you got there, Cloud. He sounds like Rufus ShinRa," she said before heading for the bathroom again.

Cloud stared unbelievably at Tifa. "It's Rufus ShinRa," he cleared out.

Yuffie and Marlene both stared at him in disbelief. "WHAT?! Oh my Gawd!!!!!???" the former cried out in awe.

"What do you want?" Cloud asked, answering the call.

"It's your gothic friend and his little girlfriend. I don't know what I'm going to do here with them. I think Vincent and Lucrecia's suspecting something already," Rufus said.

"You asked them questions?" Cloud asked.

"Yeah and I almost got busted. Won't you come over here?"

Cloud thought for a while. "Sure. Just make sure that your Soldiers and Turks will stay away from me," he said before hanging up.

"That's Rufus ShinRa?" Yuffie asked.

"No, I lied." Cloud fibbed so that they would stop asking questions.

"Yeah, well you are SO a bad liar!" Yuffie yelled after Cloud as he walked out the room.

Yuffie frowned slightly. "TIFA!" she yelled.

Barret came instead with a glum look on his face. "Teef's in the bathroom. Whaddya want with her?" he asked.

Yuffie stood up, "Cloud just went out!" she said.

"Let him go out. He might want to just take a moonlight walk with Aerith," Barret replied.

"But daddy, Miss Aerith is resting upstairs." Marlene explained.

"Fine… alone?" he asked.

"I don't think he's the type to do that… besides, he mentioned a very ugly name moments ago…" Yuffie began.

"The name isn't ugly, Yuffie." Tifa corrected as she stepped out of the bathroom.

"What's the name?" Barret asked.

"Rufus ShinRa," Yuffie replied with a frown on her face.

"What the fuck?! That darn foo'…" he cursed.

"You think one of us should follow Cloud?" Yuffie asked.

"I'll do it," Tifa presented before running out of the house.

Barret turned to Yuffie with a look of awe on his face. "Maybe we should follow her too…" he said.

"Why? It's not like she'll rape Cloud or something?" she stated jokingly before laughing.

"If she heard you, she'd kill you, Miss Yuffie…" Marlene warned with an impish smile on her face.

"Oh foo'! Whatever… and how'd you know the meaning of the word, Marlene?" Barret demanded from his daughter.

"Heehee! I heard it from Mister Cid!" she replied proudly.

Barret made a face and scratched his head. "I oughtta tell that guy to shut up…" he muttered miserably as he stared helplessly at his daughter.

***

            Tifa followed from behind Cloud, though he didn't seem to notice. She wondered at first where he was going; he even took the train… and when the train stopped in Sector 1, Tifa already knew where Cloud was heading…

"ShinRa…" she thought silently with a frown on her face as she stopped in her tracks, hiding behind a tall post before the entrance of the ShinRa HQ grounds. She clenched her fists when she realized that the guards actually let Cloud in. Her mouth dropped open. "How did…" she thought silently in total bewilderment. "Don't tell me he's with ShinRa?" she made a face and sighed heavily. "Now how am I gonna get inside?" she thought silently as she stared up at the tall ShinRa Tower, remembering how they infiltrated it. She smiled weakly. "Heheh… I don't wanna climb up there… I guess I'll just use some brain here…" she stepped out from her hiding place and started to walk all-wobbly, acting like she was dizzy. She approached the gates. "Oh…" she moaned as she reached for her head and just fell to the ground.

The Soldiers were in awe upon seeing a girl just faint. "Oh no!?"

The three Soldiers approached her and tried to help her up. "Are you okay, miss?"

"Silly, she fainted!"

"What are we gonna do?"

"Take me inside…" Tifa thought silently.

"Let's just take her inside…"

She felt herself being lifted up.

"Man, isn't she pretty?"

"Yeah… and look at those…"

"Stop it man?! You guys are perverts!"

Tifa thought for a while upon remembering that she still had some magic. "I could just knock 'em out cold…" with that, she opened her eyes and made the man drop her on the ground by slapping his face. "Ow…" she mumbled under her breath before casting sleep on the three.

They instantly fell asleep, falling to the ground and started snoring.

She sighed contentedly as she got up, rubbing her behind. "That's some nasty fall…" she muttered glumly as she looked around but she hid behind one of the posts away from the security cameras which were practically everywhere. "Where did Cloud go?" she thought silently as she scanned the place from where she is. "At least I'm inside…" she thought with a frown. She was about to make a move for the next hallway to the elevators as quickly as she could, but she stopped herself when she heard some voices from one corner of the lobby.

"Where are you taking me, Vincent?"

"I figured that maybe you would want to take a stroll around Sector 1 so that you could relax, Lucrecia."

"You're too kind, Vincent. But really, I'd rather just stay in my room…"

"Are you sure? You look like you need some fresh air."

Tifa's eyes grew wide upon seeing Vincent with a woman. "What the… Vincent's in ShinRa? And who's the girl?" she thought in surprise as she covered her mouth to stop herself from gasping.

Lucrecia smiled sweetly at Vincent as he took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. "Thank you, Vincent. Will you come with me then?" she asked.

Vincent smiled at her. "Of course, I will, Lucrecia," he said as he led the way outside, but Lucrecia stopped him first. "But what if Rufus looks for me?" she asked.

"I told Reno that we'd be going out. Rufus is in his office talking to a visitor… whoever he is. Didn't really see." He explained.

With that, they exited the building.

Tifa blinked in awe as she turned her gaze to the elevators. "Cloud's in Rufus's office…" she thought silently before running for the elevators before the security camera could turn to her direction. She made it just in time, one of the elevators were free. She instantly got in and pressed the button to the 70th floor and hoped that no one else would be riding the lift with her. She stayed near the door, leaning closer to it to prevent the security camera from seeing her.

***

            "Vincent," Lucrecia began.

"Hmm?" he turned to her.

She was not looking at him but her eyes reflected too much confusion. "Who am I?" she asked.

"I want to tell her but I might confuse her… and maybe if she remembers Hojo, I'll lose her again…" he thought sadly as he looked away.

"Vincent?" she asked again, hoping to have caught his attention.

He smiled gently at her. "I'm so sorry, Lucrecia… but I cannot tell you as of now… I think Rufus is going to be the one to explain everything to you…" he said apologetically.

She looked away, feeling a little disappointed. "Oh well…" she shrugged before sighing heavily.

Vincent looked away but he was thinking, "Why are you here anyway? And how come you cannot remember anything?" he turned to look at her again and he blushed when he realized that she was staring up at him with a gentle smile on her face. "You remind me so much of someone…" she began.

He raised his eyebrows. "Who?" he asked.

She looked away, turning to the ground. "The man in the picture that I was holding," she explained.

He suddenly remembered something. "You said that you were looking for him, right?" he asked.

She nodded. "But I cannot really remember him… like everything is a blur… but I could remember getting that picture from this old mansion in… in some kind of town, I can't remember it…" she stopped when she felt her heart aching. She gasped for air and just clutched her left chest tightly. "V…Vincent," she struggled to say as she grabbed his arms.

Vincent had this worried look on his face as he helped her. "I think we should get back in ShinRa now…" he told her.

She nodded weakly as she rested her head on Vincent's shoulder.

"I'll just carry you," he said as he began to lift her up in his arms. Lucrecia couldn't help but notice his left claw… and she blinked upon seeing it… and then with wide eyes, she looked up into his red eyes in awe.

She could see clear flashbacks in her mind as they made their way back to ShinRa.

By the time they arrived there, he immediately took her back to her room.

"Here we are," he said as he lay her down gently on the bed. Surprisingly, as he did so, she reached out her right hand to touch his hair as she continued to stare into his eyes. Then, her hand traveled down to his claw and touched it as she trembled. "Vincent?" she asked.

"Yes?" he asked as he sat down on the bed beside her.

She had tears in her eyes as she began to recall more things…

Their meeting by the gates of Nibelheim

Everything.

"It's you… Vincent… it's you…" she said as she began to cry, sitting up quickly so that she could reach out and embrace him tightly. "Oh my God… Vincent… it's you…" she said.

But deep inside her, she wanted to kill herself because of guilt…

Guilt.

She hated it…

It's what had made her suffer for so long…

"But he's here now, right? He will take away the guilt…" she thought silently as she felt his arms wrap around her.

Vincent stared down at her unbelievably. "A…are you okay, Lucrecia?" he asked. "What's going on?" he thought silently in disbelief.

She rested her head on his shoulder. "Please stay here with me…" she said gently.

He blinked and smiled gently at her. "Of course, Lucrecia." He told her reassuringly.

"I…I remember everything now…" she admitted.

He frowned. "Everything?" he asked.

"Yes… the JENOVA project… everything!" she said as more tears streamed down from her eyes.

He swallowed hard, remembering the time when he saw her kissing Hojo… "That bastard…" he thought silently.

"Uhm… Lucrecia," he began.

"Where is Hojo?" she asked.

That's it… the dreaded question. He froze for a few minutes, no knowing how to answer. "If I tell her that he's dead… she might go ballistic… she loved the guy, right?" he thought silently as he bit his lower lip.

"Vincent?" she asked.

He sighed heavily as he loosened his embrace so that he could look at her. "He's… dead." He said simply with a voice that sounded almost like a choke.

Silence.

Nobody moved for a few seconds until they heard someone knocking on the door.

Vincent completely moved away from her so that he could to go the door. He opened it with a weary look on his face.

It was Reeve.

"Good evening, Mister Valentine. Is Miss Lucrecia okay?" Reeve asked with a kind smile on his face.

Vincent took a look at Lucrecia, who was still seated on the bed and staring at him with wide eyes, then back to Reeve. "She's fine. Except for the fact that she felt some chest pains moments ago… and yes, she can remember everything that happened in the past." He explained in a low but whispery tone so that she wouldn't hear any of it.

She looked down to the floor as she clasped her hands together on her lap, pursing her lips as she sniffed. "Am I still being punished?" she thought silently before turning to the window, seeing the night sky outside and looking at the stars.

They seem to be mocking her and she hated it…

Too much guilt made her feel so uncomfortable that she wanted to kill herself. "But why am I still here?! I'm supposed to be dead!" she thought angrily as she clenched her fists.

Reeve took a peek at Lucrecia and noticed her current actions, but then he just turned back to Vincent with a weak smile on his face. "Well then… tomorrow, we will be conducting some tests on her…" he said.

Vincent frowned. "Tests? What for?" he demanded.

"She still has some of JENOVA in her. If I'm not mistaken, Hojo had injected JENOVA cells in her while she was pregnant with Sephiroth so that the old bastard would know the effects of JENOVA cells to an unborn child… besides, this could lead to safety, you know?" Reeve pointed out.

Vincent nodded mindlessly. "Just as long as this will not harm her." he said.

Reeve nodded. "Very well, Mister Valentine. Good night. I'll see you in the morning." He said before leaving.

Vincent closed the door and sighed heavily before walking back to Lucrecia.

"What did he say?" she asked.

"Uh… Lucrecia, tomorrow, they will be conducting some tests on you…" he trailed off when he saw her eyes widen in shock, but before she could react further, he continued to speak as he sat down beside her and held her hands gently. "…no, they reassured to me that you will be safe. It's not the tests that Hojo did to you… it's different… it's also for your own good… for your own safety!" he explained with a gentle look on her face.

She shook her head in fear. "N…no! I'm… I'm afraid!" she said.

"But you're a scientist… you shouldn't be afraid," he pointed out.

She shook her head as more tears streamed down from her eyes. "Real scientists do not wish any harm to befall on others when they do experiments… they wish for the safety of humankind when they want to achieve something, not to put others in danger. I… I was… I was…" she could go on. There goes the feeling of guilt again. She hated it…

She dreaded it…

Especially when she was looking into Vincent's eyes and feeling that nasty guilt both at the same time.

His expression softened as he took her in his arms and embraced her tightly. "Shh… stop blaming yourself… the least you could do now is… is to change yourself for the future to come… and… stop brooding over the past…" he stammered, realizing that he should also take that advice seriously.

Sure, he admits to himself that he still reflected on the past and relived all the events in his mind for several times until he feels so down and so disappointed, wishing that he'd just drop dead…

"We're both victims, Lucrecia…" he whispered sadly.

She sniffed as she nodded, biting her lower lip as she leaned her head on his shoulder.

Vincent smiled bitterly. "…but we have to be strong…" he told her.

She closed her eyes as more flashbacks returned to her. She opened them again after several minutes when she realized that Vincent was already laying her down on the bed.

He looked down at her. "I thought you had fallen asleep." He said.

She shook her head. "I… I was just reflecting…" she admitted sheepishly as he placed the blanket over her body up to her upper chest. "I'll just be in the couch over there," Vincent told her.

She sat up and grabbed his left claw before he could completely walk away from her. "No! S…stay here… with me… please… You're the only one that I know now… and I don't trust Rufus and the others… please don't leave me, not even move too far from me… I don't want to part from you, Vincent… please?" she pleaded with tear-stained eyes.

He didn't want to see her cry some more and feel that she is scared of something, so he just lay down beside her, embracing her gently.

She sighed in contentment as she rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you, Vincent…" she whispered softly before she finally drifted off to sleep.

Vincent smiled discreetly before he fell asleep.

For the first time in several years, he didn't have nightmares…

--------------------------------