Chapter Six:
Starting Again
(Author's Note: Samantha has a real hard time now, fighting a fit of madness and trying to fit into her new surroundings. The plot deepens here, and becomes darker. Sorry if it isn't very interesting, but at the beginning it portrays Sam as a shallow character, but she isn't shallow at all. So in this chapter we take a closer look at her past and her response to certain characters. The rest of the story is based on this chapter. I hope that you persist in reading, this is probably the deepest chapter. Yet...)
Samantha had seen the relief on Seifer's face at the thought of freedom, even though he'd only been in the police van for about half an hour. Rinoa however had pushed on.
"Your sister is now working for us, she agreed to do that to stop you from getting hurt. She's sacrificed everything for you. Will you forgive her?" Samantha hadn't heard Seifer's reply, but she got the tone of it when Rinoa threw the video link out of the car window. Samantha went to sleep.
When she awoke the cars were driving out of Balamb. How had they got here? Rinoa was in the back of the car with her now and she was sorting through a large amount of paperwork. Samantha looked over at it, they were profiles of serial killers. She saw some of the famous ones, Kijuo, Junon, Gengerty, Almasy. Rinoa stopped at Seifer's record and pulled out a match. She set fire to it and threw it out of the window. Samantha wondered if that was what Rinoa did with most things she didn't want. Samantha amused herself imagining Rinoa throwing Squall out of the window.
"So you're awake, sleepy head?" Rinoa asked. Samantha smiled at the sorceress.
"Yeah... How far away are we? When we get there, can I have room 652E please? It's just I had that one when I stayed for the concert, and I grew rather attached to it," Samantha knew she was rambling. Rinoa rubbed her eyes and let her hands fall onto her lap.
"Seph, is dorm 652E taken?" She called into the front. Selphie scratched her head.
"Don't think so. I know that 653E, 652W and 653W are taken, because that's me, Zell and Squall. I suppose the other dorm must be empty, not that I've ever noticed. I'll check it up, hang on," There was the sound of clicking on a keyboard. Selphie tucked her hair behind her ears, and frowned when it sprang into her face again.
"Nope, it's empty. I'll put you down as Samantha... Samathan Anonymous, you don't want people to know who you really are, there'll be prejudice then. I'm sure that that's the last thing you want at the moment," Selphie was still clicking away. Samantha didn't say anything. She just sat ang watched Balamb Garden appear. The dawn light gleamed off it's many windows and the brass propeller blades. The Ragnarok was on standby to take up all those who wanted to her into the flying structure.
That had been the problem. Getting the garden to fly, flying it around, fighting with it, they were all things that the masterminds of Garden could figure out. But landing it. Landing it was a different kettle of fish. No matter how hard people tried, they were too afraid of damaging Garden to try and land it. So far they didn't even know what fuel Garden ran off. If it ever ran out there would be one hell of a mess.
Samantha got out of the car and was greeted by a few SeeDs who handed her a map and a little brochure of what there was to do in Garden. Samantha took the leaflets without much thought. She walked into the Ragnarok and watched as the Quad came into view. There were a few Garden cadets chatting by the entrance. By the edge though, there stood Leonhart, Edea, Cid, Quistis and Zell. Samantha wondered what the big fuss was about, then remembered that Seifer had given Rinoa information, this Garden needed.
Samantha watched Zell with mixed emotions. She wanted to blame him for what had happened, but somehow she knew that it was all her fault. He stood there, impatiently, and tapped his foot. Samantha felt her heart flutter. Here we go again. Why can't you hate him? Isn't he the one who drove you to do that? Now you have to be a prisoner until Garden don't want you anymore. That's his fault!
Samantha suddenly remembered something...
* * *
A sunny day. A beach. The sound of a child laughing. A large house...
* * *
Samantha shook her head. What had just happened? A flashback? She looked across to Rinoa, who was almost bouncing on her chair. Samantha saw Cid back away as the landing ramp went down and the usual rush of air issued from the ship. She stood up and began to try and un-crease her clothes. Talk about fighting a losing battle.
* * *
"I'm gonna tell!"
* * *
Samantha stumbled and felt a wave of nausea. Not now! Please not now! Flashbacks, or something, now this? Please please please not now! Samantha stumbled again. Emotional overload.
"Zell," She managed to mumble before she fell into darkness.
. . .
"Rinoa what the hell did you do to her?"
"N-nothing! She just fell!"
"Move out! Move it, I've seen her like this before! Get-out-the-way!"
"Oooh! Doctor Dincht!"
"Has a certain ring to it. Is it true that people fall for the people who look after them?"
"Will you guys shut up!"
"Not when it gets you so worked up!"
"This is serious Irvine. I'll have to send you to your dormitory if you don't co-operate."
"Sorry Quisty."
"She's waking up!"
. . .
"I'm okay," Samantha whispered, opening her eyes. She winced as she felt the bruises on her legs and arms begin to ache and hurt. She tried to sit up but a firm hand pushed her back down again.
"Really, I'm fine! Geez! First you break your deal with me, then you practically kidnap me, I've just had a seizure because of that, and you're telling me to lie down! Thanks. Lying down on a hard cold stone floor will really help," Samantha said sacastically. She looked around her. This time when she sat up no one tried to stop her. She shook her head and stood.
"Hyne, my head hurts. So, where's my dorm?" Samantha acted completely normal, her actress skills paying off. She looked from one surprised face to another and sighed.
"Seifer's safe. Ellone and the baby's safe. Everyone's fine, except me. Now please, I want to sleep. If you wanna stop me from doing so, expect about... Four or five more seizures. Of course then there is a strain on the heart and there is the possibility I'd die. But hey! Who cares right?" Samantha tucked her hair behind her ears and waited. Aha! 1-0!
"We'll show you to your dorm. You sure your ok?" Squall asked. Samantha smiled, in what she hoped was a reassuring way.
"Yeah. I'll be fine after I've had a nice nap, a shower and a nice cup of coffee. I know where the cafeteria is, so I'll do the last myself. Um... My stuff?" Samantha knew that she was doing all the talking, but silence would make her think more, and thinking wasn't good for her at this time.
"Zell went to get it. It's in his room now. Miss Almasy?" The corners of Squall's mouth twitched. "Welcome to Garden." Samantha nodded and smiled again. Maybe it'll be ok here? Squall's nice enough, and we're practically family as well. Maybe everything will be ok?
"Thanks. I'm sure Satan says that to all his hosts," Samantha said, turning. There was a brief pause before they realised what she'd said. Then there was a slight snigger. Samantha turned her head to see what they were doing.
"For Hyne's sake! Show me the way!"
* * *
"Aren't the fireworks pretty?"
"I didn't know we were setting fireworks off tonight."
"I'm gonna tell!"
* * *
"Whoa!" Samantha shook her head. Still she felt a strange familiarity with that conversation. She'd never had it with anyone. She didn't recognise any of the voices.
"You gonna faint again?" Irvine asked. Samantha shook her head again. Flashbacks? Were they? Farseeking? Who was the little boy who was going to tell? Who was the calm woman? Who thought the fireworks were pretty?
"Visions... They started in the Ragnarok... Well, I'll figure them out, I guess," Samantha said, stumbling on. Selphie jogged forward and flung her arms around her. Samantha, although slightly surprised, returned the hug, and the little woman squeezed even hardly. Samantha was sure that soon her ribs would break.
"Selphie, if she wants to start her training she's going to have to be in one piece, not squished into two halfs!" Rinoa said. Squall and Zell went to pry Selphie's hands from around Samantha's waist. Selphie took this as a game and sqeezed even harder.
"Selphie please. I'm tired. Just let me get some Hyne-damned sleep!" Samantha added a gentle tone of annoyance. Selphie pulled away and looked very happy. She doesn't understand. Although we've been penfriends forever, she still doesn't know me. To her I'm the happy person in the letters, she was never told the bad things. She doesn't know. No one knows.
"C'mon then. Me and Zell'll take you. Our dorms are really close by. Selphie can come too, if she wants, but she has lots of work to do on the winter ball. doesn't she!" Selphie couldn't fail to get the warning tones in Squall's voice. Samantha looked at her brother-in-law. For some reason she knew him, though she'd only ever met him a few times. He was a lone wolf. Or had been. Shame that he's my brother-in-law. And taken. Not that I feel anything for him... But still, he'd be quite a catch...
"Y-yeah! Work! Best get cracking then! C'mon Rinoa, Quisty, Irvy! Let's go do work!" Samantha smiled at Selphie's sarcasm and watched as she walked away. Samantha looked to Squall, he too was smiling.
"Selphie always manages to brighten up my day. Her letters were a great help when my dad died. She's so cheery all the time. And so impossible to work with, it's untrue," They set off. Samantha waited for the other two to say something. And waited. And waited. And waited. Zell doesn't have a problem speaking to me usually. Why now?
"Here's the dormitories. That's yours. I'll be waiting in mine. Once you've unpacked your things and had a shower I want you in there immediately," Squall said, coldly and almost with emotion creeping through. Samantha wondered if she should salute. He wants me in his room ASAP. WOW!
"Are you sure Rinoa would think that was a good idea?" Samantha said, smiling in a mischievous way as she ran to keycard through the doors locking system. She heard Zell stifle a laugh, his shoulders shaking slightly with the laughter. Squall just looked at her coldly.
"Take a joke! Why would I want to- your know- with my brother's wife's brother. That'd be so gross!" Samantha saw Zell almost collapse laughing. Squall ran his keycard through the door and slammed it. Samantha watched Zell open his dormitory.
"I'll just get you your stuff. Wait inside your dorm, I could be a while," Zell said, disappearing into the depths of his room. Samantha walked into her room. The neutral colours on the walls were slightly depressing, everything in this place was blue! She saw the way everything was neat and tidy. She took her shoes off and set about making the place her own. She arranged the things that Garden set as standard, such as towels, wash-cloths and toiletries. She then went to the bed.
She flopped down, just as she hit the covers-
* * *
"I don't want her to go!"
"You have no choice."
"I don't want her to!"
"Seifer!"
* * *
Samantha sat bolt upright. Seifer? Her brother? That wasn't possible! How could she been hearing her brother's past? He hadn't said much about his past, so she had no idea who the other people were. She knew that Seifer had ended up in an orphanage, maybe that was it? Well, with that mystery solved, she could cope with the other visions, they were becoming slightly more informative at least.
"Samantha? It's me, Zell, open up!" She heard the hammering on her door. She stood up and shakily opened the door. That voice, that cold, calm and authoritive voice. Who did it belong to? Who didn't her brother want to go?
"Hey. You have my stuff, right?" Samantha asked, although the answer was obvious. Zell's arms were full of her clothes, make-up, bed clothes, she even noticed one of her soft toys under some of it. Zell pushed passed her and dumped the stuff on her bed.
"Zell? You didn't... Pack my underwear did you?" Samantha asked, suddenly very embarrassed. Zell grinned in a guilty way, Samantha turned the colour of a ripe tomato. Ok, so he's seen your underwear. Big deal, Irvine's seen your underwear. But I guess that was different. I wonder what else he's seen? He hasn't completely stripped you room has he. If he has he'll have found those letters... Those letters from Irvine...
"I packed everything. Almost. There were some pieces of paper, but I left those with your mom. She didn't seem to mind much. I forgot, Ellone gave birth last night. It's a-" Zell didn't finish what he was saying because Samantha fell into his arms.
* * *
Alone. Where'd you go? Why can't I be with you? I want to go home! This isn't my home! I want my matron... I want my Seifer! I'm scared, I don't know these people.
"MATRON!" No one is coming. No one is coming to dry my tears. I want Seifer! I want Squall, Zell, Selphie, Quisty and Ellone! I want my brothers and sisters!
* * *
"Samantha, you ok?" Zell asked. Samantha didn't reply. You like being held like this. So you're going to pretend that you are still in your flashback. You're pathetic. But what was that flashback about? Zell picked her up and gently sat her on the endge of the bed. He cleared all the mess behind her and fall backwards onto the bed.
"Sam, you're scaring me now. Wake up! C'mon!" Zell said, gently shaking her. Samantha opened her eyes slowly. That flashback... Zell, Zell was in it! He'd know what was going on!
"Do you know who matron is?" Samantha asked. Zell paled slightly and helped her up. Samantha made him look her in the eyes. "Well?" Zell turned around and picked up some of her clothes, he walked to the wardrobe and started hanging them up. Samantha realised that he knew, but he wouldn't tell her. You've hit a soft spot.
"Matron... You don't need to know who she is. She's part of the past, a past that most of us have forgotten," Zell turned and got more clothes to hang up. Part of a past many have forgotten. Part of a past that... I have forgotten... Seifer, my brother... No...
"Seifer's not my brother. I'm not- This can't be true! No, I won't believe it! I wanted Matron so much, yet she abandoned me! So did everyone else! I was so unhappy, that I blocked it from my memory. Only since- Only since I got here have I realised. The lighthouse Orphanage... And you! You were there too!" Samantha suddenly remembered. They set off fireworks, and I was watching from indoors, my seizures were too bad at that time for me to go out by myself. I was adopted and Seifer protested. I hated my new life so much, then I forgot about everything...
"You've got to be kidding. Liberi Fatali, all together again! I guess that fate does rule our lives," Zell walked towards her. Samantha wondered what the hell he was going to do, then she felt him wrap his arms around her and hug her tightly. "Welcome to the Orphanage Gang! We have got to tell Squall this! He won't believe it!" Zell let go. The door to the room burst open and Selphie bounded in. She looked all cheery and happy.
"Squall says that if you don't hurry up, he's going to come in here and forcibly remove you... Why are you two so close?" Selphie's eyes narrowed suspiciously. Samantha giggled. Selphie? Jealous? Hmmm. Let's see...
"We were making out, but since you so rudely interupted-" Samantha couldn't help it, she just started laughing. "You should see your face. I had something in my eye, that's all! Geez Seph, anyone'd think you were jealous!" Samantha managed to stop laughing.
"I'll go and see Squall now. Something very interesting has happened," Samantha smiled mysteriously. Selphie as getting more and more curious. Samantha walked out onto the corridor.
