Episode 7: Potential Carpe Diem
THE EPISODE THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, BECAUSE THIS WAS DONE DURING FINALS!!!
**********************************************************
[Kelso's hallway. FEZ, Eric, Hyde are walking. Stops in front of Kelso's room door.]
ERIC: I wonder why Kelso wasn't at the basement today. That's so odd.
HYDE: Yeah... no one to come home to.
FEZ: Yes and the ice cream man was so upset.
HYDE: Sad? FEZ, you ended up eating all the ice cream.
FEZ: Yes and it was good.
ERIC: [thinks] Something must be wrong.
FEZ: Maybe he is crying because he lost Jackie to his best friend Hyde.
HYDE: He said he was over it.
ERIC: Hyde. You said you were over it.
HYDE: No I didn't.
FEZ: Yes you did. You said, "I'm so over it, Kelso."
HYDE: Forget it. Let's get Kelso.
ERIC: Yeah. Maybe he's sick.
[They open the door. FEZ / HYDE / ERIC Shriek. Kelso is sitting on the bed wearing glasses and is studying]
ERIC / HYDE / FEZ: Oh my God!!!
HYDE / ERIC: You wear glasses?!?!
FEZ: You're studying?!?!
[CREDITS]
**********************************************************
[Kelso's Room. Kelso is on the bed. Eric, Hyde and Fez looks scared.]
KELSO: [takes off glasses and puts the book down] I can explain!
HYDE: [looks at book] BIOLOGY?
ERIC: Kelso! I'm so disappointed in you.
KELSO: No! No! The book has some funny pictures!
FEZ: That is true.
HYDE: Since when do you wear glasses?
ERIC: Let alone study!
KELSO: Well... I promised my mom I'd study. You know how I want to be an astronaut.
HYDE: [points at him] No wonder you do better than me at school! All this time!
ERIC: What about the glasses, four eyes?
FEZ: What are you guys talking about? Kelso has glasses. Not four eyes. [shakes head and laughs to himself] Maybe you guys need glasses.
HYDE: No FEZ. He wears glasses. People who wear glasses are called 'four eyed.'
FEZ: Oh. What's wrong with four eyes? You can see more... if you know what I mean. [nudges Eric and smiles]
HYDE: Kelso. Have you been acting stupid this whole time?
KELSO: No. Most of the time, not all the time.
ERIC: So you're telling me you're not an idiot?
KELSO: [thinks about it] What was the question?
FEZ: Kelso. I'm proud of you for wearing glasses and being a man about it.
KELSO: Hey that reminds me. Okay! You guys. Don't tell anyone about the glasses and the studying. It's not a hot feature.
HYDE: [pats Kelso's back] Don't worry man. We got your back.
**********************************************************
[Forman basement. The gang, excluding FEZ and Kelso. Hyde is in his chair. Eric and Donna are on the couch. Jackie is on the other chair.]
DONNA: [looks at Eric] Kelso wears glasses?!?! OH MY GOD!
ERIC: Yup.
HYDE: Yeah... he's a four-eyed dummy.
JACKIE: Oh my God! No wonder Michael always needed to look at those educational magazines really closely.
HYDE: Educational?
JACKIE: Yeah. The one with the pictures of the human bod- Ohh... right.
ERIC: Not only that you guys... but we caught him studying.
JACKIE / DONNA: OH MY GOD!!
DONNA: WHAT?!?! Are you sure?!?!
JACKIE: Are you sure he wasn't looking at the pictures?!?!
ERIC: Nope. Studying.
[JACKIE / DONNA freak out. Kelso comes in and sits down on the couch next to Donna.]
KELSO: Damnit. The ice cream man got away!
HYDE: Hey Kelso. My eyes hurt right now. Can you read this card I got from school for me? [tosses card to Kelso]
KELSO: Sure. [he looks deep into it] Umm... I... Kel-so... am... an... idiot...
[Everyone laughs]
KELSO: Well HYDE! I guess your teacher likes me better than you if she's gonna talk about me in your report.
[Fez comes in wearing Elton John-liked glasses with no lens in them.]
FEZ: Hey guys! What do you think?
ERIC: I dunno FEZ...
DONNA: Where are the lens?
FEZ: Well. When I put them on it hurt my eyes and so I thought I would see better without them.
HYDE: So you're wearing glasses with no lens?
JACKIE: What's the point?
FEZ: The point is... I am sexy no?
JACKIE: No.
[Kitty calls from upstairs to Eric]
KITTY: ERIC! Dinner!
ERIC: (to gang) Oh yeah! My mom's friend, Cheryl, is coming over.
DONNA: You don't sound too happy.
ERIC: Yeah... I mean it's great for my mom to talk to her friends again and reminise... but after her friend leaves... it's hell for us. She is going to cry and cry about how much she misses them. Plus with the menopause... it's not a pretty sight.
KITTY: [From upstairs and menopausal] ERIC!!!
ERIC: Okay that means I have to go. [gets up and leaves]
**********************************************************
[Forman Kitchen. Kitty and Red. Kitty is cooking and baking. Red is trying to taste some food. Kitty slaps his hand away]
KITTY: [slaps RED hand] Red. No!
RED: Oh come on Kitty. I'm hungry.
KITTY: Now Red. You know when Cheryl comes we'll eat.
RED: Kitty... why do you have to have your silly girly friends over.
KITTY: Red... I haven't seen Cheryl in years... she's my girlfriend! I need girlfriend Red.
RED: Couldn't I just get Eric over here and cry for you? I can make him cry.
[Eric is standing at the door]
ERIC: Umm... mom...
KITTY: Well... no Red! I have Cheryl coming over.
RED: Couldn't you at least have a friend we can stand to look at?
ERIC: Why mom? What's wrong with Cheryl?
KITTY: Oh nothing dear. She's just wasn't really the best looker.
RED: Not even dogs would play with her.
ERIC: Mom... is this true?
KITTY: No no... it's not. Dogs were scared of everyone!
**********************************************************
[Hyde's Room. Jackie and Hyde on the bed.]
JACKIE: Wow... Michael has glasses. Who wouldn't known?
HYDE: I'm still kinda stuck on him studying. [shivers]
JACKIE: I think that's cool that he studies... he's making a life for himself.
HYDE: Jackie. What kind of life? It's Kelso!
JACKIE: I don't know. Maybe we all should be thinking about our future.
HYDE: Jackie... our future?
JACKIE: Yeah Hyde. When we grow older, we can be rich and take care of each other. You can pamper me.
HYDE: Jackie come on now. You're basing all this because Kelso was studying?
JACKIE: We have to think about our future Steven! You don't want to stay in this basement forever, do you?
HYDE: It's not so bad. Put it a little cushions and you can be pampered all day.
JACKIE: [groans] Hopeless! [walks out]
HYDE: [shouts] And we can have all the beer you want!
[commercial]
**********************************************************
[Forman living room. Eric, Red, Kitty are sitting on the couch looking bored. Doorbell rings. Kitty gets up and rushes to the door]
KITTY: I got it.
RED: [whispers to Eric] Be prepared to be scared.
KITTY: [Opens it] CHERYL!!!
CHERYL: [comes in and she's HOT for an older lady] KITTY!!!
[Eric and Red look at her and then at each other]
ERIC / RED : wow
KITTY: Come in! Come in! Sit!
CHERYL: [walks in] Oh Hi Red!
RED: Hi Cheryl. You look different. What happened?
KITTY: Yes... you look wonderful!
CHERYL: Thank you! Thank you! I would love to thank my doctor for all of this. [looks and sees Eric] Oh and is this little Eric?
RED: Always has been little.
ERIC: Thanks dad. Yes. I'm big Eric now. [shakes hand with Cheryl]
CHERYL: My! He's a looker!
ERIC: [chuckles] Stop [stops chuckling] I like you!
KITTY: [directs Cheryl to couch] Well Cheryl how is everything going?
CHERYL: [sits] Everything is amazing! I'm skinny, I'm rich, and I'm just absolutely gorgeous!
RED: Here here!
[Kitty gives him a look.]
RED: So Cheryl, what are you doing here in Wisconsin?
CHERYL: Oh I'm just visiting friends before I go to Europe.
KITTY: You're going to Europe?
ERIC: That is so cool!
KITTY: Europe. Wow... why do you want to go there?
CHERYL: Why don't you want to go there Kitty?
RED: It's too expensive.
CHERYL: Oh Red. Aren't you a little too old to be thinking about money?
RED: [drop fork and spoon] What?
CHERYL: I mean come on Red. We aren't getting any younger. We just need to live a little before it's too late. Carpe Diem! Seize the day! [looks at Eric] You should listen to this advice. You're still young.
ERIC: All right!!!
KITTY: Cheryl, it's not that we're not spontaneous, because Red and I are spontaneous.We are known as pre-tty wild people.
ERIC: Mom!
CHERYL: Really Kitty?
KITTY: Yup. [laughs] Right Red?
RED: [looks at Kitty, then Cheryl] Look Cheryl. We would be more spontaneous if we didn't have our priorities to take care of. Like our careers, our homes...
KITTY: Oh and Eric!
RED: Yeah him too. The government is making me take care of this one.
ERIC: Thanks dad.
**********************************************************
[Forman Basement. Circle. Hyde, Kelso, Donna, FEZ]
HYDE: Man... Jackie wants me to think about our future. I mean... she's basing this on Kelso man. It's like being in Hell man. Kelso!
KELSO: [wearing glasses] Oh man... these things make everything seem bigger! Looking at nudie magazines had never been better!
DONNA: [hits Kelso] You know what! I think you and Jackie should be thinking about the future. I mean Eric and I already made a future for ourselves! Look! We're like PERFECT! Cept he's kind of scrawny and wimpy, but hey! He's MY scrawny and wimpy boyfriend!
FEZ: Oh Hyde. Kelso isn't such a bad person to follow.
HYDE: Really FEZ?
KELSO: [laughing and looking at magazines] You guys gotta look at these! They're like ten times bigger! It's like a magnifying glass for my eyes man!
FEZ: [to Hyde] I'm so sorry.
DONNA: [points to Hyde] You know what Hyde! Jackie's my friend too and you are my friend and just you two should just talk it through and don't take no for an answer! [looks at Kelso] Stop looking at my chest! [hits Kelso]
KELSO: Ah! Ow!
**********************************************************
[Forman Kitchen. Dinner. Red, Eric, Kitty, Cheryl are sitting on the table. Everyone is quiet.]
KITTY: Well. Isn't this nice?
CHERYL: Oh Kitty it is! I love what you did with the place!
KITTY: Why thank you Cheryl. That's so kind of you.
CHERYL: It isn't like Gene's place, but hey it's comfy.
RED: Gene who?
CHERYL: Oh my newphew Gene Simmons.
ERIC: No way! You're Gene Simmon's aunt?
CHERYL: Oh course! Who else taught him how to stick out his tongue? Used to have a fight with him like that when he was a child. Always stick our tongues out at each other.
ERIC: Wow! That's awesome! So you met the band?
CHERYL: Met them? Honey I raised them!
KITTY: Wow Cheryl. You're been doing a lot I can tell.
CHERYL: Yes. Lots of things have been going on for me! Before I came here, I told my friend Lee - Lee Majors of course - that I was going to travel to Europe, but I must go see my old high school friends before I travel the world! And he told me that I'm a very interesting woman - which is very true - and that if Farrah wasn't there, he'd marry me. But of course, I had to go and leave.
ERIC: [sounds interested] Wow.
KITTY: [jealous] Really?
RED: [annoyed] Oh geez.
**********************************************************
[Forman Basement. Hyde, FEZ, Donna. Jackie comes in from door. Hyde is on his chair. Donna and FEZ are behind the couch talking.]
JACKIE: Steven! We need to talk! You have potential! I want to be rich! It works out!
HYDE: Jackie, listen. I'm not the guy you want me to be. I'm me.
JACKIE: I know, but there's so much more you can be!
HYDE: If we have a future together. It wouldn't be the dream you always wanted.
JACKIE: That is where you are wrong Steven! You become rich and that's all!
HYDE: It's like talking to a wall that talks back!
JACKIE: [sits on couch closest to Hyde] I believe in you Steven. I know you can be something great!
HYDE: Alright Jackie. We'll see about it. Okay? [kisses her]
DONNA / FEZ: Awww...
HYDE: Shut up.
[ERIC comes down from the kitchen]
ERIC: Hey you guys. My mom friend's Cheryl is upstairs and she is related to Gene Simmons and she knows Zepplin!
DONNA: Really? That is so cool.
ERIC: Yeah and she said when she comes back from Europe, she'll call them up and get tickets to their concerts! She also has this thing. Carpe Diem.
DONNA: She talked about fish?
ERIC: No it's latin for Seize the day! You have to hear her talk. She's so cool.
FEZ: I can wear these! [puts glasses on and smiles at Donna] Hellllo.
ERIC: She left already, but wow. We all should listen to what she said.
EVERYONE: Yeah sure. [everyone sits on the couch, cept Hyde who is sitting on his chair and Fez is sitting on the other chair]
ERIC: Let's do something memorable you guys!
DONNA: Like what?
JACKIE: I know! Let's go shopping!
ERIC: Seriously guys! We should do something that people won't forget!
HYDE: Forman. We already painted the water tower. What else is there?
ERIC: There is always more Hyde. There is always more. We just got to think of something.
FEZ: Yes... something stupid.
ERIC: And crazy...
[KELSO runs in from the door.]
KELSO: Hey you guys! I thought of something crazy and stupid we can do!
HYDE: What a coincidence! I was thinking about you being crazy and stupid!
ERIC: Kelso what is it?
KELSO: Let's put Jello mix into the pool!
ERIC: He never disappoints me.
[The guys leave.]
**********************************************************
[Forman Kitchen. Kitty is doing the dishes. Kitty looks sad. Red comes in and sees her sad.]
RED: Kitty. I know you miss your friend already, but think. Now it is only us.
KITTY: [cries] It's not that Red. It's just that. [looks at him] We're SO boring!
[Kitty cries on Red's shoulder]
RED: Oh. It's okay. Boring isn't so bad. I mean... it means people leaves us alone!
KITTY: [looks at him sternly] It's just that Cheryl comes and she tells me about her life of traveling and everything. I just feel like I'm missing out on something.
RED: Oh Kitty! You're not missing anything! Remember yesturday when Eric fell from the car when he was on top of it just hanging out and he didn't know I was in the car and I started driving with him on top of it. And the way he was screaming.
KITTY: [laughs] Oh that is true.
RED: I mean, we're good boring.
KITTY: [stern] Boring? [laughs] No Red. I'm not boring. No No No. As for you... [stops and thinks] We're classic!
[They kiss]
**********************************************************
[Closing Credits]
[School Pool. Kelso, Eric, Fez and Hyde are at the Edge of the Pool throwing cartons of Jello into the pool. FEZ is on the diving board throwing more Jello in.]
ERIC: Man. This is great. I can't wait for the swim team to jump in and swim in a pool of jello.
KELSO: Just think about the girls swim team in jello.
ERIC: This is going to be great! We are seizing the day and doing something spontaneous!
HYDE: Man. Good thinking Kelso. Hey FEZ! How's it going there?
FEZ: It's going good! Can you toss me another box please?
HYDE: Fez are you drinking the pool water?
FEZ: [gives them a look and there is water and jello mix on his mouth.] No.
KELSO: [tosses box to FEZ] Here!
SPLASH!
FEZ: [falls into pool] Ahh!
ERIC: FEZ! Are you okay?!
HYDE: FEZ? What's going on?
FEZ: Ohh... Jello has never tasted so good! Uh-oh... the jello starting to harden!
**********************************************************
THE EPISODE THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, BECAUSE THIS WAS DONE DURING FINALS!!!
**********************************************************
[Kelso's hallway. FEZ, Eric, Hyde are walking. Stops in front of Kelso's room door.]
ERIC: I wonder why Kelso wasn't at the basement today. That's so odd.
HYDE: Yeah... no one to come home to.
FEZ: Yes and the ice cream man was so upset.
HYDE: Sad? FEZ, you ended up eating all the ice cream.
FEZ: Yes and it was good.
ERIC: [thinks] Something must be wrong.
FEZ: Maybe he is crying because he lost Jackie to his best friend Hyde.
HYDE: He said he was over it.
ERIC: Hyde. You said you were over it.
HYDE: No I didn't.
FEZ: Yes you did. You said, "I'm so over it, Kelso."
HYDE: Forget it. Let's get Kelso.
ERIC: Yeah. Maybe he's sick.
[They open the door. FEZ / HYDE / ERIC Shriek. Kelso is sitting on the bed wearing glasses and is studying]
ERIC / HYDE / FEZ: Oh my God!!!
HYDE / ERIC: You wear glasses?!?!
FEZ: You're studying?!?!
[CREDITS]
**********************************************************
[Kelso's Room. Kelso is on the bed. Eric, Hyde and Fez looks scared.]
KELSO: [takes off glasses and puts the book down] I can explain!
HYDE: [looks at book] BIOLOGY?
ERIC: Kelso! I'm so disappointed in you.
KELSO: No! No! The book has some funny pictures!
FEZ: That is true.
HYDE: Since when do you wear glasses?
ERIC: Let alone study!
KELSO: Well... I promised my mom I'd study. You know how I want to be an astronaut.
HYDE: [points at him] No wonder you do better than me at school! All this time!
ERIC: What about the glasses, four eyes?
FEZ: What are you guys talking about? Kelso has glasses. Not four eyes. [shakes head and laughs to himself] Maybe you guys need glasses.
HYDE: No FEZ. He wears glasses. People who wear glasses are called 'four eyed.'
FEZ: Oh. What's wrong with four eyes? You can see more... if you know what I mean. [nudges Eric and smiles]
HYDE: Kelso. Have you been acting stupid this whole time?
KELSO: No. Most of the time, not all the time.
ERIC: So you're telling me you're not an idiot?
KELSO: [thinks about it] What was the question?
FEZ: Kelso. I'm proud of you for wearing glasses and being a man about it.
KELSO: Hey that reminds me. Okay! You guys. Don't tell anyone about the glasses and the studying. It's not a hot feature.
HYDE: [pats Kelso's back] Don't worry man. We got your back.
**********************************************************
[Forman basement. The gang, excluding FEZ and Kelso. Hyde is in his chair. Eric and Donna are on the couch. Jackie is on the other chair.]
DONNA: [looks at Eric] Kelso wears glasses?!?! OH MY GOD!
ERIC: Yup.
HYDE: Yeah... he's a four-eyed dummy.
JACKIE: Oh my God! No wonder Michael always needed to look at those educational magazines really closely.
HYDE: Educational?
JACKIE: Yeah. The one with the pictures of the human bod- Ohh... right.
ERIC: Not only that you guys... but we caught him studying.
JACKIE / DONNA: OH MY GOD!!
DONNA: WHAT?!?! Are you sure?!?!
JACKIE: Are you sure he wasn't looking at the pictures?!?!
ERIC: Nope. Studying.
[JACKIE / DONNA freak out. Kelso comes in and sits down on the couch next to Donna.]
KELSO: Damnit. The ice cream man got away!
HYDE: Hey Kelso. My eyes hurt right now. Can you read this card I got from school for me? [tosses card to Kelso]
KELSO: Sure. [he looks deep into it] Umm... I... Kel-so... am... an... idiot...
[Everyone laughs]
KELSO: Well HYDE! I guess your teacher likes me better than you if she's gonna talk about me in your report.
[Fez comes in wearing Elton John-liked glasses with no lens in them.]
FEZ: Hey guys! What do you think?
ERIC: I dunno FEZ...
DONNA: Where are the lens?
FEZ: Well. When I put them on it hurt my eyes and so I thought I would see better without them.
HYDE: So you're wearing glasses with no lens?
JACKIE: What's the point?
FEZ: The point is... I am sexy no?
JACKIE: No.
[Kitty calls from upstairs to Eric]
KITTY: ERIC! Dinner!
ERIC: (to gang) Oh yeah! My mom's friend, Cheryl, is coming over.
DONNA: You don't sound too happy.
ERIC: Yeah... I mean it's great for my mom to talk to her friends again and reminise... but after her friend leaves... it's hell for us. She is going to cry and cry about how much she misses them. Plus with the menopause... it's not a pretty sight.
KITTY: [From upstairs and menopausal] ERIC!!!
ERIC: Okay that means I have to go. [gets up and leaves]
**********************************************************
[Forman Kitchen. Kitty and Red. Kitty is cooking and baking. Red is trying to taste some food. Kitty slaps his hand away]
KITTY: [slaps RED hand] Red. No!
RED: Oh come on Kitty. I'm hungry.
KITTY: Now Red. You know when Cheryl comes we'll eat.
RED: Kitty... why do you have to have your silly girly friends over.
KITTY: Red... I haven't seen Cheryl in years... she's my girlfriend! I need girlfriend Red.
RED: Couldn't I just get Eric over here and cry for you? I can make him cry.
[Eric is standing at the door]
ERIC: Umm... mom...
KITTY: Well... no Red! I have Cheryl coming over.
RED: Couldn't you at least have a friend we can stand to look at?
ERIC: Why mom? What's wrong with Cheryl?
KITTY: Oh nothing dear. She's just wasn't really the best looker.
RED: Not even dogs would play with her.
ERIC: Mom... is this true?
KITTY: No no... it's not. Dogs were scared of everyone!
**********************************************************
[Hyde's Room. Jackie and Hyde on the bed.]
JACKIE: Wow... Michael has glasses. Who wouldn't known?
HYDE: I'm still kinda stuck on him studying. [shivers]
JACKIE: I think that's cool that he studies... he's making a life for himself.
HYDE: Jackie. What kind of life? It's Kelso!
JACKIE: I don't know. Maybe we all should be thinking about our future.
HYDE: Jackie... our future?
JACKIE: Yeah Hyde. When we grow older, we can be rich and take care of each other. You can pamper me.
HYDE: Jackie come on now. You're basing all this because Kelso was studying?
JACKIE: We have to think about our future Steven! You don't want to stay in this basement forever, do you?
HYDE: It's not so bad. Put it a little cushions and you can be pampered all day.
JACKIE: [groans] Hopeless! [walks out]
HYDE: [shouts] And we can have all the beer you want!
[commercial]
**********************************************************
[Forman living room. Eric, Red, Kitty are sitting on the couch looking bored. Doorbell rings. Kitty gets up and rushes to the door]
KITTY: I got it.
RED: [whispers to Eric] Be prepared to be scared.
KITTY: [Opens it] CHERYL!!!
CHERYL: [comes in and she's HOT for an older lady] KITTY!!!
[Eric and Red look at her and then at each other]
ERIC / RED : wow
KITTY: Come in! Come in! Sit!
CHERYL: [walks in] Oh Hi Red!
RED: Hi Cheryl. You look different. What happened?
KITTY: Yes... you look wonderful!
CHERYL: Thank you! Thank you! I would love to thank my doctor for all of this. [looks and sees Eric] Oh and is this little Eric?
RED: Always has been little.
ERIC: Thanks dad. Yes. I'm big Eric now. [shakes hand with Cheryl]
CHERYL: My! He's a looker!
ERIC: [chuckles] Stop [stops chuckling] I like you!
KITTY: [directs Cheryl to couch] Well Cheryl how is everything going?
CHERYL: [sits] Everything is amazing! I'm skinny, I'm rich, and I'm just absolutely gorgeous!
RED: Here here!
[Kitty gives him a look.]
RED: So Cheryl, what are you doing here in Wisconsin?
CHERYL: Oh I'm just visiting friends before I go to Europe.
KITTY: You're going to Europe?
ERIC: That is so cool!
KITTY: Europe. Wow... why do you want to go there?
CHERYL: Why don't you want to go there Kitty?
RED: It's too expensive.
CHERYL: Oh Red. Aren't you a little too old to be thinking about money?
RED: [drop fork and spoon] What?
CHERYL: I mean come on Red. We aren't getting any younger. We just need to live a little before it's too late. Carpe Diem! Seize the day! [looks at Eric] You should listen to this advice. You're still young.
ERIC: All right!!!
KITTY: Cheryl, it's not that we're not spontaneous, because Red and I are spontaneous.We are known as pre-tty wild people.
ERIC: Mom!
CHERYL: Really Kitty?
KITTY: Yup. [laughs] Right Red?
RED: [looks at Kitty, then Cheryl] Look Cheryl. We would be more spontaneous if we didn't have our priorities to take care of. Like our careers, our homes...
KITTY: Oh and Eric!
RED: Yeah him too. The government is making me take care of this one.
ERIC: Thanks dad.
**********************************************************
[Forman Basement. Circle. Hyde, Kelso, Donna, FEZ]
HYDE: Man... Jackie wants me to think about our future. I mean... she's basing this on Kelso man. It's like being in Hell man. Kelso!
KELSO: [wearing glasses] Oh man... these things make everything seem bigger! Looking at nudie magazines had never been better!
DONNA: [hits Kelso] You know what! I think you and Jackie should be thinking about the future. I mean Eric and I already made a future for ourselves! Look! We're like PERFECT! Cept he's kind of scrawny and wimpy, but hey! He's MY scrawny and wimpy boyfriend!
FEZ: Oh Hyde. Kelso isn't such a bad person to follow.
HYDE: Really FEZ?
KELSO: [laughing and looking at magazines] You guys gotta look at these! They're like ten times bigger! It's like a magnifying glass for my eyes man!
FEZ: [to Hyde] I'm so sorry.
DONNA: [points to Hyde] You know what Hyde! Jackie's my friend too and you are my friend and just you two should just talk it through and don't take no for an answer! [looks at Kelso] Stop looking at my chest! [hits Kelso]
KELSO: Ah! Ow!
**********************************************************
[Forman Kitchen. Dinner. Red, Eric, Kitty, Cheryl are sitting on the table. Everyone is quiet.]
KITTY: Well. Isn't this nice?
CHERYL: Oh Kitty it is! I love what you did with the place!
KITTY: Why thank you Cheryl. That's so kind of you.
CHERYL: It isn't like Gene's place, but hey it's comfy.
RED: Gene who?
CHERYL: Oh my newphew Gene Simmons.
ERIC: No way! You're Gene Simmon's aunt?
CHERYL: Oh course! Who else taught him how to stick out his tongue? Used to have a fight with him like that when he was a child. Always stick our tongues out at each other.
ERIC: Wow! That's awesome! So you met the band?
CHERYL: Met them? Honey I raised them!
KITTY: Wow Cheryl. You're been doing a lot I can tell.
CHERYL: Yes. Lots of things have been going on for me! Before I came here, I told my friend Lee - Lee Majors of course - that I was going to travel to Europe, but I must go see my old high school friends before I travel the world! And he told me that I'm a very interesting woman - which is very true - and that if Farrah wasn't there, he'd marry me. But of course, I had to go and leave.
ERIC: [sounds interested] Wow.
KITTY: [jealous] Really?
RED: [annoyed] Oh geez.
**********************************************************
[Forman Basement. Hyde, FEZ, Donna. Jackie comes in from door. Hyde is on his chair. Donna and FEZ are behind the couch talking.]
JACKIE: Steven! We need to talk! You have potential! I want to be rich! It works out!
HYDE: Jackie, listen. I'm not the guy you want me to be. I'm me.
JACKIE: I know, but there's so much more you can be!
HYDE: If we have a future together. It wouldn't be the dream you always wanted.
JACKIE: That is where you are wrong Steven! You become rich and that's all!
HYDE: It's like talking to a wall that talks back!
JACKIE: [sits on couch closest to Hyde] I believe in you Steven. I know you can be something great!
HYDE: Alright Jackie. We'll see about it. Okay? [kisses her]
DONNA / FEZ: Awww...
HYDE: Shut up.
[ERIC comes down from the kitchen]
ERIC: Hey you guys. My mom friend's Cheryl is upstairs and she is related to Gene Simmons and she knows Zepplin!
DONNA: Really? That is so cool.
ERIC: Yeah and she said when she comes back from Europe, she'll call them up and get tickets to their concerts! She also has this thing. Carpe Diem.
DONNA: She talked about fish?
ERIC: No it's latin for Seize the day! You have to hear her talk. She's so cool.
FEZ: I can wear these! [puts glasses on and smiles at Donna] Hellllo.
ERIC: She left already, but wow. We all should listen to what she said.
EVERYONE: Yeah sure. [everyone sits on the couch, cept Hyde who is sitting on his chair and Fez is sitting on the other chair]
ERIC: Let's do something memorable you guys!
DONNA: Like what?
JACKIE: I know! Let's go shopping!
ERIC: Seriously guys! We should do something that people won't forget!
HYDE: Forman. We already painted the water tower. What else is there?
ERIC: There is always more Hyde. There is always more. We just got to think of something.
FEZ: Yes... something stupid.
ERIC: And crazy...
[KELSO runs in from the door.]
KELSO: Hey you guys! I thought of something crazy and stupid we can do!
HYDE: What a coincidence! I was thinking about you being crazy and stupid!
ERIC: Kelso what is it?
KELSO: Let's put Jello mix into the pool!
ERIC: He never disappoints me.
[The guys leave.]
**********************************************************
[Forman Kitchen. Kitty is doing the dishes. Kitty looks sad. Red comes in and sees her sad.]
RED: Kitty. I know you miss your friend already, but think. Now it is only us.
KITTY: [cries] It's not that Red. It's just that. [looks at him] We're SO boring!
[Kitty cries on Red's shoulder]
RED: Oh. It's okay. Boring isn't so bad. I mean... it means people leaves us alone!
KITTY: [looks at him sternly] It's just that Cheryl comes and she tells me about her life of traveling and everything. I just feel like I'm missing out on something.
RED: Oh Kitty! You're not missing anything! Remember yesturday when Eric fell from the car when he was on top of it just hanging out and he didn't know I was in the car and I started driving with him on top of it. And the way he was screaming.
KITTY: [laughs] Oh that is true.
RED: I mean, we're good boring.
KITTY: [stern] Boring? [laughs] No Red. I'm not boring. No No No. As for you... [stops and thinks] We're classic!
[They kiss]
**********************************************************
[Closing Credits]
[School Pool. Kelso, Eric, Fez and Hyde are at the Edge of the Pool throwing cartons of Jello into the pool. FEZ is on the diving board throwing more Jello in.]
ERIC: Man. This is great. I can't wait for the swim team to jump in and swim in a pool of jello.
KELSO: Just think about the girls swim team in jello.
ERIC: This is going to be great! We are seizing the day and doing something spontaneous!
HYDE: Man. Good thinking Kelso. Hey FEZ! How's it going there?
FEZ: It's going good! Can you toss me another box please?
HYDE: Fez are you drinking the pool water?
FEZ: [gives them a look and there is water and jello mix on his mouth.] No.
KELSO: [tosses box to FEZ] Here!
SPLASH!
FEZ: [falls into pool] Ahh!
ERIC: FEZ! Are you okay?!
HYDE: FEZ? What's going on?
FEZ: Ohh... Jello has never tasted so good! Uh-oh... the jello starting to harden!
**********************************************************
