Haldir looked up at the sound of running steps.  He only caught a brief glimpse of Vista disappearing out the door, like she was fleeing for her life. 

He walked over to Celeborn, "Where is Vista going?"

Celeborn sighed, "She is upset.  Maybe you should leave her be for a while."

Haldir raised an eyebrow, "And why is she upset?  She was perfectly fine a moment ago."

The older Elf didn't answer and, instead, turned to leave.  Haldir stepped in front of him, blocking his path. 

"What did you say to her?  Why did she flee from you?" he asked.

Celeborn studied Haldir for a moment before replying.  "I change my mind.  Find her and ask.  Many things cannot be observed in a mirror, but by those other then ourselves."

Then Celeborn was gone, leaving Haldir alone and greatly vexed.

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            Vista ran.  She didn't know where she was or which direction she was going, but that didn't matter.  She just had to run.  Trees flashed past, each one undistinguishable from the next.  But as fast as she could run, she couldn't outrun the voice in her head that was set on 'echo' :

"...believe that Haldir loves you deeply.....believe that Haldir loves you deeply....Haldir loves you..."

            Vista skidded to a halt and screamed.  She spun to the side and kicked a sapling, snapping it neatly in half.  She almost decked the tree to her left, but her common sense told her that it wouldn't be a good idea.  Vista longed for something to punch, something to bite and scratch, to beat and mutilate.  She swirled around the clearing violently, sometimes shadowboxing, sometimes just screaming.  But always moving, always moving.  Finally, Vista exhausted herself and slumped to the ground. 

This can't be happening.  This can't be happening to me.  I can't handle it.  I can't handle another... something...anything.  Is this what a mental breakdown feels like?

            Vista distractedly watched the clouds, trying not to think....She used to do this when she was a child, back home in Ohio, with Matt.  They would walk out into the middle of her family's cornfield and try to find shapes in the cloud.  As they got older, they moved to star gazing.  Matt had a telescope in his attic and they spent countless nights observing the night sky.

            They had been best friends.  Even when girls were icky and boys were gross, they'd still played together.  They spent rainy days and hot summer afternoons hatching the stupidest plans about everything, from world domination to pranks for the next school year. 

            Freshman year he'd started a band and asked Vista to be the bass player.  They hadn't had any original songs, so they played cover tunes at a Battle of the Bands at their high school.  Surprisingly, they'd won first place.  The band didn't last; but, then again, no one expected it to.  It was just another thing to do....

It just has to rain, doesn't it?

            While Vista had been lost in her thoughts, the clouds had turned dark and were now filling the air with falling moisture.  Vista didn't move; just laid on her back, eyes closed, letting it rain.  It was always raining in Seattle....

            She'd been so happy when she was accepted to the Art Institute in Seattle.  Vista'd always been an artist at heart, doodling in any free space on anything she could find.  Several of her drawings had won prizes at fair and other local competitions.  Several other noted art colleges had rejected her applications and Vista had begun to think that she wasn't good enough for college.  Then, she'd gotten a call from the AI, and they offered her a full-ride scholarship.

            So she moved to Seattle, got an apartment and a part-time job and started school.  It was the coolest thing that she'd ever done.  Vista loved job, thrived in her classes, and adored her apartment.  If only Matt lived down the street; then everything would have been perfect....

            And now she was stuck here.

I'm stuck here, Matt's dead, and now...AAAUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Can it get any worse? 

"Vista?"

Fuck!  It just got worse.

***************************************************************************************************************

            This was the third time Haldir had found her soaking wet.  By now, it was almost routine.  She was lying on her back in a large puddle in the middle of a clearing.  Her eyes were closed, like she was sleeping; but the changing expressions on her face told of deep thought.  She was covered with mud and smaller trees around her bore signs on extreme violence, leading him to wonder what happened.  She looked so peaceful, so beautiful, that he didn't want to disturb her at first.  But his curiosity got the better of him.

            He voiced her name to announce his presence as he stepped into the clearing.  Vista's eyes flew open in alarm.  She scrambled to her feet and backed away from him in a panic.

"NO! AUGH, no, NO!!  Leave, I can't talk to you...I don't want to...just go!" she shrieked.

Haldir froze, What happened?  "Vista, what happened here?  Are you injured?"

Vista shook her head violently, sending water everywhere, "I'm fine, I'm fine!  Just go!  Leave!  NOW!"

What's going on?  Now he was sure that something happened.  The entire time he'd known her, he'd never seen her so...violent.  Or so afraid.  Of him, no less.

He moved forward, "I am serious, Vista.  What happened?  Tell me!"

She shook her head again, moving backwards, "No, no, stay away from me!"

            Looking back, if she hadn't hit that tree, she may have gotten away.  He'd leapt across the clearing too quickly for most to have followed his move, but she'd started backing off before he got to her.  Then she backed in to the tree and didn't have the time to move before he was there, pinning her wrists to the bark.  She struggled and kicked out at him, trying to keep him away.  After a moment or so, he managed to also pin her feet by standing on them lightly. 

            She was shaking severely, but not from the cold.  Her eyes were wild and her head tossed as she looked for a potential escape.  Why is she so afraid?

"Vista," he said softly, "Vista look at me."

"No.." she sniffed, "no, let me go."

"Look at me, Vista." he said firmly.

Her green eyes snapped up to meet the gray of his.  Hers were clouded with tears and, behind those, fear.  Fear of Haldir.  Where did this come from?

"It pains me to see you fear me so." he murmured.  The tears began to fall.  "Tell me why you cry."

Anger flashed briefly through her eyes, "Why ask me?  Why don't you ask Celeborn, eh?"

"Because he told me to ask you.  What did he say that upset you so much?"

Vista then did something that caught him totally off-guard.  She blushed furiously; like someone being forced to admit some self-damning secret.  I can't believe he's making me say this.  She glanced away from him briefly, then back.

"Celeborn said that.." she choked on the words.  "...that..." she took a deep breath.

"That you're in love with me."

For an instant, Haldir felt his entire mind go completely blank.  What?  But...how?  When?  Am I?

 Wait...

"And this causes you distress?" he snarled. 

Vista seemed to swell with anger, "YES!" she yelled at him.

He was so taken aback by that admission that he dropped his hands.  She gave him a shove and shot around him, back into the clearing.

"Yes, it 'causes me distress'!!  I don't wanna be torn, Haldir!" she yelled.

"Torn?  So there is another, then." he muttered, a strangely placed feeling of dejection setting in.

Vista laughed harshly, "There's ego for ya.  Torn between my world and this one, dumbass.  I'll already miss the kids, and you to some extent.  But I can't afford more ties!!"

Haldir glared at her, "Ego?  Can't afford more ties?  Gandalf as good as told you that there is no hope of you going home.  Maybe you should start adjusting to that."

            As soon as he said it, he regretted it.  She had been battling Gandalf's words for weeks, stubbornly holding onto hope.  In a way, she depended on him to help her keep that hope.  And now he'd taken that clay jar and shattered it.  She turned and fled up the path behind her.

I need to talk with Celeborn...and Gandalf, he thought.