Part 3-THE WAITING BEGINS
The elevator door opened and Speed stepped out into the Intensive Care Unit of Pondview Hospital, an antiseptic glass-enclosed place that had rooms with glass doors separating them from the nurse's station. Each room had its occupant hooked up to heart monitors, breathing apparatus, intravenous tubes and other forms of technological life-support. Overall, it was a depressing place with death lurking in each corner, in spite of being painted a bright pale yellow.
Speed rushed up to the desk and asked the nurse anxiously. "I was told that Trixie Shimura has been transferred here from the emergency room. Dr. Wellby said I can see her, which room is she in?"
The nurse peered up at his worried countenance. "Are you family, sir?"
Speed opened his mouth but Dr. Wellby came up to the desk and addressed the nurse. "It's okay, nurse. Mr. Racer has my permission to go into Miss Shimura's room and to stay with her."
The nurse did a double take. "Mr. Racer? Speed Racer?"
Speed groaned inwardly as he saw the fan adulation light up the nurse's eyes but if his being a sports celebrity would gain him the acceptance he needed to be by Trixie's side then so be it. He managed a bland but polite smile. "That's me."
"Oh, by all means, Mr. Racer. Miss Shimura's in room 6. It's just around the corner, to your left." She came from behind the desk. "I'll come with you, if you don't mind. I have to get a reading from the heart monitor and check on her meds."
"Ah--okay, sure," Speed hesitated, hoping she wouldn't gush about his racing. He was really in no mood to bask in the glow of his celebrity, all he wanted to do was see Trixie. Thankfully, the nurse was silent and professional as she accompanied him to room 6.
They entered the glass doorway and stepped in. Speed felt his heart drop to his feet as he viewed Trixie, with a heart monitor, two intravenous bottles, and a respiration monitor all hooked into her slender supine form. The heart monitor registered a traveling dot that peaked with every heartbeat, showing that she was still alive. The nurse approached the bed and began taking readings and then took her blood pressure and other vitals as Speed just stood there staring.
The nurse finished getting Trixie's vitals and gestured to Speed. "There's a chair over there, Mr. Racer. If you need anything the call bell is there." She pointed at the risen bar on Trixie's bed where a push button attached to a cable that went into the wall. She turned and left.
Speed slowly pulled the chair over to Trixie's left side and sat down, not taking his eyes from her. She looked wan and pale, making her appear even more delicate than usual. He took note of the intravenous tubes in each of her arms and the wires that went to the monitor with its continuous beating. She was still breathing unassisted by any device but her breathing was soft and shallow.
Speed slowly, hesitantly reached to take one of her hands in his. "Hiya, Trix, baby. It's me and I'm gonna stay right here, I'm not goin' anywhere." He gently ran one of his hands on her cheek, which was lukewarm. "Everyone else is here too but they wouldn't let them come in but they're outside the door." He pointed to the glass door where Mom and Pops, Spritle, and Sparky stood, all peering in. "They want you to know that they love you honey, and they want you to get well."
Speed turned his attention back to Trixie. "Oh baby, I'm so, so sorry this happened to you. If I had just left the damned steering alone, you wouldn't be here, we'd be at the lodge right now, sitting in front of a fire and just being together. I was really looking forward to spending some real fun times with you, all alone." He continued caressing Trixie's cheek, studying every inch of her face as if he wanted to record it forever in his memory.
Speed continued gazing at Trixie, his eyes soft and his heart pounding. "You're so beautiful, Trixie. Did I ever tell you that? The day I first saw you I was dazzled, you were the most incredible amazing girl I'd ever seen, even covered in grease from head to toe." He chuckled, "That's what fractured me the most, was that you were so pretty but smart and independent, you really turned me on in a way like nobody else. You're so different from the other girls I've known."
Girls—goodness knows there've been plenty. Lorena, Lilly, Sibana, just to name
a few. They always flock to me before and after races, and even when I just walk
down the street. Before I met you,I loved the attention, like any other red-blooded
American man but you changed all that, Trixie. I know you've gotten jealous about
these girls and I'd be a liar if I told you that I didn't like it but I do and believe me,
sweetheart, you have nothing to be jealous about, those girls couldn't hold a candle
to you. Even Yvonne Von Vondervon in the Junk Car Grand Prix who caught my
eye when she was so good at fixing cars, she could never take your place in my heart.
No girl could, no princess, no heiress, no daredevil, no lady racer, no girl could or
would.
He went on, "I'm so glad that you decided to join the Go Team. I know I never told you this, but knowing you're looking out for me during races adds to my confidence to win. And when there are thugs and creeps out there trying to stop me, you're right there, either flying above me to take care of 'em or by my side, fighting them with as much punch and guts as me. They don't even expect it coming from a pretty little thing like you, but I know that for such a small package you pack quite a wallop. Baby, you're the most."
Gutsy—that's a word that describes you to a T, Trix. Nothing stops you, you're
almost fearless. Remember that time we were in Egypt trying to find Dr. Bone's
daughter Calcia and the temple fell in on us? I was caught with my feet under a
fallen pillar and a cobra was near me. I got out and started fighting the cobra
and you shot it, saving my life. You're always there for me, baby, no matter what.
And the time the Mach 5 had lost it's brakes in the Alpine Race and I was sliding
down an icy slope, you were right there, with your helicopter to save the day. And
when I tried to help Lightfingers Clepto Jr. and Tongue Blaggard had us prisoner
you came along and rescued us disguised as Lana (I should've known it was you
but you did such a great job disguising yourself, I didn't know it was you, even
when you were all over me). I tell you, none of the girls I went out with before I
met you would ever be able to do all that.
The clock on the wall in Trixie's hospital room showed the time to be just after midnight and Speed was wide awake, still going strong, his adrenaline flowing like a flood through his system as the doctor's words rang in his ears. 48 hours—a crucial time—she needs to come out of the coma or she could die. The endless beeping of the heart monitor accompanied the words playing in his ears like a melancholy tune that wouldn't leave him.
Nature called, so Speed left Trixie's side to go to the men's room. After he relieved himself, he went to the sink to wash his hands and idly glanced at his reflection in the mirror. He saw a pale visage of worried blue eyes with circles already underneath and a five o'clock shadow of a beard on his chin.
"You," he muttered to his rumpled image in the looking glass. "If she dies, it's all because of you!"
He then became filled with an overwhelming feeling of self-loathing and in a fit of fury, smashed his fist into the mirror, shattering it. Sighing, Speed put his head down as he braced each side of the white basin, now filled with shards of broken glass and dotted with drops of his blood from his cut knuckles. He then stood there as more memories played a midnight matinee in his mind.
Protecting you, Trix—it's something that came as natural to me as breathing. I always
felt I should protect you, no matter what scrape we got into. Remember the Anything
Goes Race and we were chasing the Mammoth Car? We followed it to the refueling
station and Cruncher Block's goons tried to kill us. I pushed you down and pulled you
under me so they wouldn't get you. And the time we were in Abalonia and President
Montebank was targeted by assassins and they came after us, I pushed you behind me,
protecting you again. It's been my favorite pastime watching out for you since you've
made it your mission in life to watch out for me. And I did a pretty good job of it till
now. I really screwed up that steering and now, because of that, you're on the verge
of dying. I'm such a damned fool!
There was a knock on the door and someone asked, "Are you okay in there, Mr. Racer?"
Speed closed his eyes and answered, "Yeah, I'm fine. I'll be out in a second." He shook his head as he surveyed the damage his rage and frustration wrought. He reached up and tore off some paper towels to blot the blood still dripping from his hand and opened the door to let himself out.
Two nurses stepped aside when Speed exited the men's room and immediately noticed his bleeding hand. "Oh Mr. Racer, your hand! You need to get it treated so come over to the nurse's station." They led him to the station and sat the depressed young man down to clean and dress his wound with him barely acknowledging the action. His cuts treated, the head nurse then tried to convince Speed to lay down in a room made up with a bed for family members of seriously ill patients so he could get some rest but he refused and returned to Trixie's side to continue his worried vigil.
Speed re-entered the room and stared at Trixie. Maybe it was the darkness of the wee hours and the pale light provided by the overhead florescent light casting an almost eerie glow over the bed but he couldn't see any movement at all, she was so still. Just the continuous beeping of the heart monitor assured him that she was still alive, otherwise there was absolutely no sign of life in her. Not one sign of the life and joy, which was so much of her that she lit up his life, like a ray of summer sunshine.
You always believed in me, Trix. From the moment we began getting close, you made
me believe that I could do anything, that nothing is beyond my grasp. Your faith in me
sustains me and pushes me to achieve greatness. Even when Pops forbid me to go
forward in racing you were the one who made me believe in myself. You talked me into
entering races that Pops, because of his own fears, told me that I couldn't and subsequently
I was able to prove to both him and myself that I could enter and win. And I did win, with
you right by my side. As a matter of fact, there were times I doubted but you wouldn't
let me. Remember the time we were discussing my first real race against Racer X and
you told me I was not the type to let anyone stand in my way. And I wrapped my arm
around you and said that was so because you wouldn't let me let them. Just knowing
that you're supporting me makes me believe in myself that much more.
Speed sighed as he sat back down beside Trixie's bed. He leaned over the bar and studied her, letting his eyes glide down the outline of her sheet covered body and noted the lissome delicacy of her figure, a figure that appeared fragile but was deceptively strong and agile. She was so nimble on her feet, that teaching her martial arts moves was one of his favorite things to do with her. When they weren't racing or riding in the Mach 5, he often would spend time doing katas with her, things he's learned after so many years of martial arts training and he was pleased to discover that she had taken to it like a duck to water and showed an above average aptitude for it. That just served to endear her to him even more. And like him, she looked at life as an adventure, enjoying challenges but differing from him by being cautious where he would just go forward full steam most times without thinking. She was yin to his yang, a stabilizing force that kept him grounded and focused.
A real fighter. That's another thing I really love about you, honey, you're a
fighter. You give as good as you get and nothing fazes you. The most sinister,
vile, crooked crook or thug doesn't stop you from helping me achieve my goal
and win my races. You always are there to help me stamp out evil plans of
those who would pervert races for their own selfish designs. You sure are no
shrinking violet, baby. And you fight better than most guys I know, I'm sure
glad you're on my side 'cause I sure wouldn't want to be on your bad side and
meet you in a dark alley.
Speed then thought about his and Trixie's individual backgrounds. She had been brought up with the privileges that vast amounts of money provided, her father's transport business at one time the very best in the lucrative sport of racing. Her life had been lonely but filled with material luxuries to offset the early loss of her mother and her father's involvement in his business. In spite of all that, she had grown up relatively unspoiled, humble and down-to-earth. His life however, was diametrically different as his family was not wealthy, although Pops had worked as the top designer in one of the biggest car manufacturers in the world, he was constantly using his salary to develop his own new engine designs. They weren't poor but there were times that money was a bit tight as Pops would take the extra money, after the basic needs of the family were met, and pour it into another engine design to achieve his ultimate goal of designing the fastest car in the world. He was a technological genius and being such, like all geniuses he was dedicated to his craft. As his son, Speed too had been dedicated to his craft, racing had been his dream growing up and his avocation in his teens. Cars were his passion from toddlerhood and boyhood as he watched and idolized his father then his brother. Now that he was a young adult, it was his vocation, his chosen field, and how he wanted to earn his living. But now he was teeming with doubts about the whole thing. If Trixie died he just didn't know if he could bear staying in racing, now there were too many memories of races with her by his side as he was victorious. The very idea of not having her there to spur him on with her love and loyalty was just too painful to consider but was a possibility that he now faced. With a moan of anguish, Speed put his head down on Trixie's flat stomach and cried.
Please, please don't die, baby. I can't even think about life without you, we've
shared every aspect of our lives. The idea of living without you is impossible,
for you are my life. You're a part of me, Trixie, sweetheart and if you die, I'll
die along with you, life won't ever be happy for me again. Don't you know that
you are the light in my life, my special gift from God? You came into my life
and immediately you were indelibly inserted permanently in my world. Nothing
matters now except you getting through this and I'm gonna go through it right
with you, nothing or nobody is gonna take me away from right here by your side.
You can't give up, Trixie, you're not a quitter, haven't you told me that before?
Well, that means you can't give up and leave me!
Speed's thoughts had caused him to doze off and then he was jolted to awareness by the steady scream of the heart monitor. He glanced up and saw the screen flatlining and then the door slid open with a bang as the staff burst in and pulled him away to get Trixie's heart started again as she slipped into cardiac arrest.
A nurse pushed Speed out of the room as Dr. Wellby came in. He addressed Speed, "You'll have to stay out here for now." He then pushed the glass door closed and Speed watched as the group of nurses and doctors worked feverishly to get Trixie's heart beating, pressed up against the glass like a little boy with his nose up against a candy shop window. He felt a cold chill of dread envelop him as he whirled about and ran to the elevator suddenly needing to escape, unable to bear witness to the life and death struggle his girlfriend was engaged in any longer.
His vision blurred by tears, Speed ran out of the hospital front door, breathing heavily as he looked blindly about. The sun was beginning to rise, heralding a bright and sunny new day and he wanted to scream at the sky and demand how dare it be so clear and bright when it was the darkest day of his life, the day his love was inside the hospital dying. His eyes then fell on the unmistakable form of a sleek white car parked in the nearly deserted parking lot, the Mach 5.
Speed slowly walked up to the vehicle, his eyes vacant and focused on the familiar machine. Pops must have dropped it off during the course of the night thinking Speed might need it. But as he came up to the car, he became filled with a rage like he had never experienced before and he began kicking the front quarter panel viciously with all the force he could muster.
"You! If the steering hadn't gotten loose, I'd have never tried to fix it and we'd never have crashed and Trixie wouldn't be in there dying. You worthless piece of junk!" he railed as he continued his assault on the Mach 5. Speed's hands balled into fists and ignoring the bandaged knuckles of his right hand he pounded on the hood of the car like a boxer pummeling a punching bag. His knuckles showed red through the bandages as he began bleeding once more.
He continued battering the Mach 5, his anguish and fury combining to enshroud him in a red haze, oblivious to anyone and anything that was around him. His tantrum was noticed by hospital staff coming in to work and they basically cast a curious eye at the famous racer beating on his car. They had all heard the news bulletins so they were aware who he was. Nobody, however, felt impelled to approach the infuriated young man.
Unknown to Speed, the low-slung yellow and black car with the 9 on the door crept into the parking lot and parked under a tree unobtrusively as the masked driver extracted himself from the cockpit. Arms crossed, he stood and watched his younger brother as the young man continued attacking the car that drove him to victory so many times. Racer X felt his heart constrict in pain for Speed as he observed him in his anguish yet he stood back, knowing that the time was not right to offer his help, that his kid brother needed the release.
Finally, his anger and energy spent, Speed ceased his thrashing and sank to the ground on his knees, his arms hanging on the hood of the Mach 5, sobbing in abject misery. He barely noticed when two strong yet gentle hands grasped his shoulders and slowly lifted him to his feet. His eyes still swimming with tears, he turned his head and saw the black and white mask of the enigmatic man who always seemed to show up when he needed him most. He fell against Racer X, his legs becoming weak as Rex held his baby brother and cried with him.
