Disclaimer: I don't own 99% of the actually characters in this story (more or less)

Chapter 7

[Living Room Cam 10:30 a.m.]

Henri and Mads are front and center on the deified couch..

"Good Mornin," Mads greeted warmly.

"It really is!" said Henri with a wicked gleam in his eyes, "We finally installed a camera in de kitchen when de workmen were takin' a coffee break-"

"Which was de betta part of de mornin'-" added Mads.

"An' again we caught some interestin' footage of Remy an' Belle at 'bout nine dis mornin'," said Henri.

"To our knowledge Remy has never in his life gotten outta bed befo' 11 in de mornin' without some coaxin', shall we say?" explained Mads.

Let alone havin' showered and gotten dressed!" Henri threw in.

"An' now de tape!" said Mads as she pushed a button on the remote.

[Cut to the Kitchen 9 a.m.]

Most of the cabinets are covered with a white tarp. The stove and other major appliances are against the far wall. Only a simple table and one chair linger in the middle of the room. Tante Mattie bustles around the kitchen as Belle sits in the chair reading Cosmo with her legs crossed in a black spandex tank top and white tennis-like skirt, while Remy is on his knees before Belle (Whatever you're thinking STOP, for the love of everything unholy! Understand that everyone is fully clothed and now without further ado the rest of the scene).

"S'il vous plait (Please)!," Remy begged rather piteously.

"NON! What's de matta wid you?!" Belle said vehemently.

"Pourquoi pas (Why not)?" Gambit was nearly whining.

"C'est moralement mauvais (It's morally wrong)!"

"Belle, since when have you had morals?"

"QUOI?!" yelled Belle taking a death grip on the magazine she was holding.

"Boy, don' make me find another job for dis rollin' pin!" warned Tante Mattie.

"Désolé (Sorry)," said Remy lowering his head into Belle's lap and giving her red on black puppy eyes.

"Don' start, Remy, I mean it!" said Belle not lifting her eyes from the magazine, she knew better.

"Mais (But)-"

"Non! Remy de answer in NON!" Belle was getting annoyed, "I am not gon' help you seduce Rogue!"

"Remy's not askin' you to help, jus' to pick a romantic location!" said Remy reassuming his original position of kneeling.

"Remy, dat's helpin'!"

"Don' tink of it as helpin'! Tink of it as a future financial investment!" damn he pulled that one out his ass.

"Quoi?!" asked Belle putting the magazine down on the table and giving Remy a baffled look, "Dat makes no sense!"

"Tante Mattie's gotta hear dis one too," said Mattie turning her attention from her bread dough.

"Dat bet we made yesterday-Tink of helpin' me pick out a place to day as insurance on de money Remy's gonna owe you!"

"Chilin' today make no sense," said Tante Mattie turning back to her bread dough. Apparently she decided it was best to stay out of the conversation.

Belle sat there for a moment deep in thought.

"Will you help or not? Quoi?" asked Remy when he saw Belle's face.

Belle smiled viciously as she ruffled his hair, "I was jus' wonderin' if yo' kids will have red on black eyes o' green on black-Get yo' coat!"

-----------------

"My God, she's pure evil!" remarked Mesmero.

"SHE'S NEXT AFTER GAMBIT!" yelled Mystique still struggling against the chains.

"Hell, I just liked seeing Gambit beg an Ex, Mate," said St. John.

"This just keeps getting better!" exclaimed Pietro.

"How can they top this?" asked Wanda.

-----------------

Everyone was staring at Hank.

"What?" he asked.

"Vich is it?" asked Kurt.

"Which is what?" Hank was still confused.

"Red on black or green on black?" asked Kitty.

"I don't know," said Hank, "I need to draw a Punett Square (A.N.: a type of grid used in Bio to determine the probability of a child's looks depending upon the looks/traits of the parents-don't think about too long or blood will spurt out your nose, trust me) and that wouldn't be totally accurate because we don't know what color Rogue or Gambit's parents' eyes were or what recessive traits their carrying."

Everyone just stared at him blankly.

"Never mind," sighed Hank, "I'll go track down some scrap paper.

[Handheld Cam at a Park- noonish]

We rejoin Henri and Mads dressed from head to foot in army fatigues complete with black streaks under their eyes and green berets; a narrow body of water is off to their right.

"We're back," said Henri with a smile.

"Did you miss us?" asked Mads.

"Whether you did or not we're in one of the parks in New Owlins-"

"An' no de camera's not floatin', we jus' propped it up on de car." said Mads.

"You're prob'ly wonderin' about the fatigues and war paint-"

"It's waterproof mascara, Henri, which reminds me we hafta stop at a drugstore on de way 'ome, Belle will kill us-slowly-if she finds out I went through her make-up!"

"Wait, dis is mascara?! Will it come off?"

"Can I get back to you on dat?"

"Merde!-" cursed Henri.

"Anyway back to the fatigues-" said Mads quickly.

"Were undercover, Remy and Rogue are over on de other side of de river on one o' de piers-so we need to blend into de surroundings, although I'm not too clear why we're wearin' de berets," he turned to Mads.

"Je ne sais pas (I don't know), dey came wid de clothes," Mads shrugged.

The two looked at each other for a few seconds longer then took off the berets and threw them out of the shot.

"Back to de objective," said Henri, "We paid off a biker to drop a microphone by de dock-"

"Dere he is!" said Mads enthusiastically.

"Bon (good)," said Henri coming forward and lifting the camera from the car and focusing it on the dock across the river from where he and Mads were standing.

[Cut to Remy and Rogue on the Dock]

"Please, Chere?" Gambit was giving Rogue his award wining smile.

"No!"

"Why not?" asked Gambit pulling Rogue into his arms.

"Because we're in a public place and someone miaght see us!"

"Uh, Cher, dat's de point!" said Gambit simply.

"Ah know, but the answer is still no!"

"Remy's been getting' dat answer a lot lately."

"Is that supposed to change mah mind?"

"Did it?"

"No"

"Remy don' see why you so up tight, Cher. Both de X-Men and de Acolytes are all de way on de other side of de country. How would dey find out about one kiss?"

"You don't know mah roommate that well, she can get blood from a stone. She has this way of getting to you until till you tell her what you want to know. Ah swear she's gonna become a prosecuting attorney as niahne to fiahve job and then just do this superhero stuff on the weekends."

"You're her roommate right?"

"Riaght-"

"So, Remy's sure you have somtin' on her dat even if she did find out she wouldn't tell. Besides you owe Remy.

"Ah owe you? Fer what?" Rogue was a bit in the dark.

"De spurs, Chere," said Gambit with a fiendish glint in his eyes.

"Ah, should've known that would come back ta haunt me," she smirked.

"So, is dat oui?

"Fahne, Gambit, you win-this round."

"Non, you win," said Remy as he took a Kleenex out his pocket and placed it over Rogue's mouth.

It started out as-you know-your average, everyday kiss between friends. Then Gambit shifted his weight forward and dipped Rogue into an extremely (as in off the charts) romantic kiss with one hand supporting her back and the other on her-(people if you don't know what the next word is you haven't been reading very carefully-AT ALL!).

-----------------

"Huston, we have lift off!" said Pietro.

"Whoa, Gambit's da man!" said St. John cocking his head to one side.

"A VERY DEAD MAN WHEN I FINISH WITH HIM!" yelled Mystique nearly wriggling out if the chains.

"What'd you do with that rope?" Sabertooth asked Mermero.

-----------------

"Whoa!" exclaimed Scott.

"Oh My God!" said Hank.

SKNIT! "WHAT THE HELL DOES ANYTHIN' HAVE TO DO WITH SPURS?!"

Jean and Kitty would have offered some more commentary, only they were experiencing J.D.S. (Jaw Drop Syndrome).

Meanwhile most of the younger members in the X-Men weren't quite sure what to make of what they were seeing. Not the kissing mind you, but the fact that Rouge actually had a social and a red hot one at that-well you know what they say about the quiet ones.

-----------------

"Damn it, Gambit, get offa me!" yelled Rogue as she shoved him away.

"Whoa!" needless to say Gambit staggered backwards, lost his balance and fell in the water. Sure, I know what you're thinking-HA HA, that's pretty damn funny-and normally I would agree with you, but in this particular situation I wouldn't because of one small problem-

-Remy never took the time to learn to swim. It must have slipped his mind at some point between chasing women, gambling, chasing women, stealing, chasing women, sleeping, chasing women, eating, chasing women, smackin' some ass, and did I mention chasing women?

-----------------

"Merde, hold de camera!" yelled Henri as he threw the camera to Mads and dove in.

Mads held the camera towards her, "We're experiencin' some technical difficulties-bare with us!" (The frame went black).

[Necklace Cam on the Shore by the Dock-12:30]

After coughing up a couple of fathoms Remy's laying down on the grass as Rogue knees near by feeling extremely guilty. Mads sits on the Dock to get the shot of Remy and Rogue, while Henri stands over to the side of Rogue.

"Whay didn' you tell me you can't swim?" asked Rogue.

"You never asked." said Gambit putting his hand on the small of Rogue's back.

"Well Ah never, a swamp rat that can't swim. What'll they think of next?"

"Ah, have a few ideas, Cher," said Remy smirking.

"Gambit, get yer hand offa mah ass!" warned Rogue.

Henri laughed, "Damn, Rem, you never give up do you?"

Gambit looked over at his brother and frowned, "Why are you wearnin' fatigues an' what's dat stuff under yo' eyes?"

"Uh, camouflage, Mads and I are doin' a documentary on-squirrels-don' wanna scare 'em off."

"Ok," said Remy giving his brother a strange look.

"That's different-what's yer angle?" asked Rogue.

"Uh-Squirrels, Cute and Fuzzy or Heinous Disease Carriers?"

"How much did you this final film was worth?" asked Remy.

"75% of my overall grade," said Henri.

Rogue shot Remy a worried look as Henri wander off.

"Don' worry our daddy's loaded."

-----------------

"Maybe I've been a little too judgmental," thought Mystique.
--------------

Next up: Picnic in the Field