A/N: If there is one thing that everyone agrees on, it's that I've gone nuts. Hey, I just write it out. There is a reason for everything, you know. Don't give up on me! Here's the next chapter.

----------Erik---------

Nadir's survival was nothing short of a miracle. Once Lyra came back inside, it took both of us to bleed him. I wished that she didn't have to see that, not with everything else, but there was no help for it. Nadir was almost comatose, but as soon as I pulled out the bleeding knife he erupted from the bed with the strength of a madman. Still, I knew no other way to get the drugs out.

It took about two days for him to regain sanity, and then we had to deal with the sickness. It was an infection that you can only get one way. I had known, of course, that Nadir enjoyed the company of women, but I had never imagined that he would sink so low. Anyway, during the ensuing chaos, someone found de Changy's body in the apartment. It was all over town in a few hours, but there was no news of the tuba case, a point that I made certain of through Leros. The eventual conclusion was that he had been looking for "the Persian" to find out more about "The Phantom," "Which" Christine said to the police "is very likely." The neighborhood explained the rest.

Finally, Nadir was aware enough to know exactly what had happened, and why. He could get up and move around, but the withdrawal was still there. It was inevitable, I suppose, that he try and fix it. What reason did he have for quitting? So, I found him one night, slumped in a chair before the fire, with the morphine on the table beside him.

---------------------Lyra--------------------------------

I was there that night, in the room as well. I had just come back from a grocery run with some more food for the cats. The only ones left were Ayesha and Mozart, the black kitten, but they ate alot! The rest had gone to Leros to distribute to good homes. We had been too busy with Nadir to be able to do anything else with them. Too busy to do much besides talk, really. It was during that time I learned about Father's life. But anyway...

I walked in as Father yanked Nadir out of the seat. "What gives you the right Nadir?! This is my house and you are not important enough for the risk!" He picked up the syringe and about three-hundered dollars of liquid morphine and chucked them into the fire. Nadir was awake enough to give a small scream at that. He started out of the chair, only to be stopped again.

"Not in this house, Nadir. You can shoot yourself up on the steps of the gallows, or in a churchyard for all I care, but not here!"

-------------------Erik----------------------------------

I was about as angry as I can get, but I remember all of it. I didn't black out as I usually do. I remember picking him up again, and storming into Lyra's room. I remember pulling the wardrobe away from the wall, exposing the door there, and the window above it. "Sleep it off in there, and stay in there for all I care!" I threw him in, closed the door behind him, hit a switch on the wall that turned on the lights, and moved the wardrobe back in front of the torture-chamber door.

-------------------------Lyra------------------------------

I was, for the first time in my life, afraid of the man I thought of as my father. The door might have had something to do with it. I had no idea where it went, but I knew without a doubt that it was not good. He turned, and the expression on his face was enough to make me take a few steps back, involuntarily. He would kill in this mood, I knew. I recognised it. He took a few steps foreward, his hand out, and I didn't stop to think. I ran, and hard. But, I was only thirteen. I might have been fast, but he had longer legs. He caught me before I could reach the lake.

That expression was imprinted on the back of my eyelids. I had no idea what he wanted, but I didn't seem to realise this. Panic was my world right then. I struggled in his hands, using, and having nullified, every move I knew. I fought until I couldn't any more. Exhausted, I looked up at him.

His eyes, glowing golden, showed no hate or anger. Instead they looked confused, terrified, and sad. "Lyra?" he asked.

I collapsed against him, sobbing. "You were going to kill me!"

----------------------Erik----------------------------------

-WHAT?!! I would never...- Then I remembered how it had felt. I had wanted the morphine, badly. It had just been sitting there, and... -Oh Lord forgive me.- I had as good as killed him by throwing him in there for bringing it back to me. How it felt to be so far away from everything, even yourself. I had meant to kill him. Throwing him in there in that state was just about as good as killing him. She must have seen something of that and... -I would have run too.- I thought. -Who knows what I might have done if she hadn't run. I want to believe that nothing would have happened. I want to.-

"I'm sorry Lyra. I'm sorry."

---------------------------Lyra------------------------------

The wardrobe was moved to the side again and the door opened. Nadir was pulled out and sent off to the parlor to sleep it off. I fought for sleep in my own bed, as far from the mysterious door as I could get. I knew what Father had felt, and he hadn't argured with me that he wouldn't have killed me. This place was not safe, but I was needed here. I couldn't leave again.

The next morning, after I had slept for about three hours, I got up and went to the kitchen. There I found Father, making himself breakfast. I fixed myself a croissant and sat down with it and an orange, pretending to read "Jane Eyre" but actually watching him carefully. He was watching me the same way. Ayesha and Mozart came in to break up the silence, but it didn't work.

It was two silent hours until Nadir woke, groggy, nursing a hangover, and under no illusions as to what had happened. With his awakening, the silence only thickened. Our cats had attatched themselves to us, and everytime we were in the same room, they went into fits of hissing. He ate a quick, small breakfast, and went out of the door.

Father was there before I was.

----------------------------Erik------------------------

"Where are you going, Nadir?"

"Away. I'm not needed here, and you can do me no more good."

"So, you mean to go off and kill youself, as you were trying to before."

"I was already stoned, and the pain wouldn't go away. I decided to make it, that's all."

"And now you're going about it knowingly."

"Your a fine one to talk, Erik. How did you find the girl? You talked in your sleep during the withdrawal, you know. 'I can't live without her' I think were your exact words. You would have killed yourself because of Christine. If there's one thing I can't stand, it's hipocrites. Now, Lyra's just like you, with her little knife and bit of rope. She's the one who killed Raoul, isn't she? I told you this would happen. Get rid of her, for both of your sakes."

"Oh, hail the great wise one. You make me sick."

"Nobody likes to see their own image. I imagine that I even LOOKED a bit like you at the worst didn't I? Now, I just want peace. You can burn for all I care. I wash my hands of you, and your brat."

"Get out of here Nadir. Out."

And he did.

Another A/N: Well, crazy or not, that's how it is! What do you think? Tell me!