Jess quickly checked the diner for the other Lorelai before leading his girlfriend into the warm room. He sat them both at a table as near to the stairwell as he could get. She picked up a menu. "Mm," she said, scanning it. "Everything sounds delicious. What do you like here?"
"Not much. I mean, I like it," he added hastily. "It's just that I have it all the time. But the first thing I had here was a grilled cheese sandwich."
"Does it come with fries?" He nodded. "Anything else?"
"Order as much as you like," he told her. "It's on the house as your first meal in Stars Hollow." She smiled and looked down at the menu again. He leaned forward to whisper to her, "And don't worry. I can only imagine how much you're eating now that…well, now. Don't worry, we can take it."
Since she had permission, she selected the grilled cheese sandwich with fries, a chef's salad—"I'm trying to eat a little healthier."—decaf coffee, and a sundae for desert. Luke looked at her, obviously skeptical. But he shrugged, used to small women ordering large amounts of food.
Another thing the Lorelais had in common, Jess thought as he watched her eat. It was amazing: he'd even missed how she could scarf down food without breathing or in some cases even chewing. He'd just missed her.
They lucked out and Lorelai…the older Lorelai didn't come in. This is going to get even more confusing very quickly, he thought, internally sighing at the edits he had going in his mental dialogue.
Anyway, they'd lucked out and Lorelai hadn't made any of her frequent late-night trips for more coffee to the diner. So, they sat until closing time, sitting close together and reading books that Jess fetched from the apartment. He heard the murmurs in the background, but ignored them. They'd have a lot more to talk about soon enough.
He and Lorelai helped Luke put up the chairs and clean up for the night. "You don't have to do this," he'd protested to Lorelai. "You're a guest."
She and Jess had exchanged a quick glance before she said, "I don't mind. It's interesting." Luke looked at her as if she were crazy but shrugged and let her continue. He seemed to like her, Jess noticed with hope, and wondered if he'd noticed the similarities between Lorelai and Lorelai. He had to talk to his uncle in private very soon.
The trio stomped up the stairs to the apartment, and sat around the cramped kitchen table in awkward silence. "So, when did you and Jess meet?" Luke asked her, desperately trying to think of something to talk about.
"Well, I had just moved to New York and it was my first day at school," Lorelai began. "I didn't want to brave the cafeteria so I went to the library instead."
"Where, naturally, you found Jess," Luke said sardonically.
Lorelai smiled. "Yeah. We made fun of each other's taste in literature. Then we got to talking and he made fun of my name."
"I just didn't believe that was her real name," Jess defended himself. "Who names their kids after mythical creatures?" He stopped himself before he visibly winced. Bad time to bring up children.
"Anyway," Lorelai said, trying to cover up the short but uncomfortable silence, "he became my sort of savior. He shared his locker with me, helped me with math, showed me the quickest routs between classes, that kind of thing."
Jess blushed slightly, and Luke snorted in disbelief. "Okay, go on," Luke said, looking both interested and amused.
"Well, that holiday break we hung out some. Then he asked me to the Valentine's Day dance the semester after that. Then that summer we made things official." She smiled at Jess, who blushed even more.
"You had her in New York and you still came to Stars Hollow?" Luke asked Jess. "How did you even end up in enough trouble to make your mom flip out in the first place?"
"I made friends with stupid people," Jess said, really not wanting to talk about past screw-ups; it would just make him look even more unprepared for what they were now facing. So he tried to keep it short. "They got in trouble and I got brought home by the cops. Nothing official, just a 'watch your step, kid,' kinda thing. Mom freaked."
"And I told him to come here," Lorelai said.
"You asked me to come here," Jess corrected her gently.
"That's what you think," she replied, smiling. "But, yes, I told him to come. And I made him promise to at least give it a shot."
"And that's why I'm doing relatively well here," Jess said. "It's interesting to think about what I might have done." He smiled a little wistfully. "I could have torn this town asunder."
"Shut up, Holden," Lorelai snapped. "If you'd done that and I'd heard about it I would have come down here to kick your—" She cut herself off and eyed Luke. "Well, I would have kicked you hard." Jess chuckled.
"So why did you come here?" Luke asked. "I mean, I'm sure you've got school, and—"
"Actually, I don't," Lorelai interrupted, and shot Jess a nervous look. "I got my GED."
"Well, what about your parents?"
"My foster parents are expecting me to call them tomorrow to tell them I got here safe. But I'm an emancipated minor, so no one can drag me anywhere I don't want to go." She took a deep breath. "I'm, uh, moving to Stars Hollow?" She hated that she sounded as if she were asking permission.
Luke sat for a moment, completely still. "Oh," he finally managed. "Wow. You must really like this guy a lot, huh?"
Lorelai bit her lip. "I love him," she said, her voice quiet.
"And I love her," Jess cut in, not wanting her to tell Luke all by herself. He had no idea how his uncle would react, but he definitely didn't want to leave her defenseless. Not that he thought his uncle would hurt her, not physically. Emotionally was another story though.
"And the thing is…. When I told Jess to go, that was also the first time I told him I loved him. And the first time that we…." She trailed off and blushed furiously. Luke looked to Jess for translation. He merely raised his eyebrows suggestively, but didn't smile.
"Oh," Luke said, eyebrows raising in surprise. "Oh," he said, comprehending. To Jess' surprise, his uncle blushed a little, too. "So, you two, uh…. Well. That's, that's…."
"And I'm pregnant," Lorelai blurted out. Jess reached across the space between them to grip her hand as they waited for the news to sink in.
Again, they'd caught Luke flat-footed in shock. His eyes were wide as he tried to comprehend. "I'm sorry. You're …what? It s-sounded like pregnant?" Lorelai nodded, biting her lip hard, waiting. "And it's Jess'?"
"Luke!" Jess snapped, and almost jumped to his feet. Lorelai held him down.
"It's not an unreasonable question," Luke defended himself. "I mean, you were gone for almost six months…."
"Five," Lorelai said.
"What?"
"He's been gone for five months. And you know how I know? Because that's how far along I am. The obstetrician in New York said so. And Jess is the only person I've ever been with or ever want to be with."
Jess looked at her, and she looked back.
"So, what?" Luke demanded. "What's gonna happen now? Huh, Jess? You're gonna drop out of high school and try to support her and the kid? What about school, Jess? What about money? Where are you going to live? Have you thought about any of this?" Before Jess could answer Luke rounded on Lorelai. "And you. Do you expect him to just drop everything in his life that he's worked hard for and support you? Why did you have to drag him into this?"
At this attack on Lorelai Jess jumped up, dropping her hand. He stood and glared down at his uncle, who still sat. "Luke, shut up," he spat. "For your information, Lorelai has forbidden me from dropping out of school. She's got plans to live here so she didn't have to raise a baby in New York and away from its father. You have absolutely no right to say those things to her. She's doing the best she can with a difficult situation and she's doing damn good. She's got her GED, she's got the skills she needs to get a decent paying job here in Stars Hollow, and she's got the intelligence to do whatever the hell she wants after that."
He stopped and took a deep breath, then looked at his uncle steadily, reigning in the anger. "And you know what, Luke? I'm going to be there for her and for our kid, because I love her, and I already love the baby, who I only found out about today. So if you're not going to be happy that we're going to be a family, you can just go to hell."
Luke stood, forcing Jess to back away from the chair. The older man loomed in front of the younger one for a long moment, their eyes locked. Lorelai thought hysterically that you could almost smell the testosterone. Then the tableau was broken as Luke stormed out.
Jess looked at Lorelai, and realized she was crying. "I'm sorry," she whispered, sounding more miserable than he'd ever heard her. "I didn't mean to cause all this trouble. You were doing well here. Maybe I shouldn't have come here, after all…"
He pulled her to her feet and sat her down on his bed, one of the only other surfaces available. He removed her shoes for her while the tears trickled down her face and she watched him in confusion. When he motioned, she lifted her arms, and he took off her bulky sweater.
Then he handed her a tissue and they stretched out on the bed, on top of the covers. His arms were around her, and she sniffled a little, then relaxed into their comforting circle.
"I do have plans, you know," she began. He just shushed her.
"Come on," he said. "What happened to the playing Scarlet? We'll think about it tomorrow."
"Okay," she said, and was soon sleeping deeply, while Jess lay awake, unsure whether he was worrying or planning.
Luke stormed out of the diner, unsure why he was so angry. The cold that hit him did nothing to diminish the feeling; it just reminded him that he'd stormed out without his coat. He stomped through Stars Hollow, and before he knew it was knocking on Lorelai's apartment door. He was frowning when she opened it, and still frowned when she stepped aside, wordlessly inviting him in.
"What's wrong?" she asked, watching him prowl around the apartment's living room, unsure whether to be concerned or amused that he seemed to be muttering to himself.
"Wrong?" he asked her, almost absently noting her presence.
"Yeah. You're really obviously pissed at something. What is it?"
"You want to know what it is?" Luke demanded. She nodded. "Really? You want to know?" She nodded again, being patient for once since he seemed extremely perturbed. "Fine. You asked for it. Jess' girlfriend is pregnant."
Lorelai's new frown almost matched Luke's. "What? What girlfriend?"
"His girlfriend from New York. She came down for a visit, only it turns out she's moving here because she's five months pregnant with Jess' baby!" Luke shoved his hands through his hair, unmindful that he knocked off his cap.
Lorelai's breath wasn't coming; she was having horrible flashbacks. "What're they going to do?"
"What do you mean, what're they going to do? He's going to throw his life away!"
"Him? What about her? You think a baby isn't going to change her life?" Memories were flooding her, memories that she didn't want flooding her; they were too painful. She tried to fight them by concentrating on the present. "What is he going to do, Luke?"
"He said he's going to be there for her!" Luke said, frustrated. "He said she won't let him drop out of school." Lorelai breathed a sigh of relief. "What are you doing?" he demanded, hearing it. "You're happy about this?"
"Happy that he's taking responsibility, even an interest, for his actions? Yeah, I'm happy about that!" She sat on the couch. "Okay, let's try and calm down. Tell me about what happened."
So Luke related the story to Lorelai, who listened raptly. "So why are you so upset by this?" she asked him.
"Are they stupid?" Luke demanded. "I mean, in this day and age, how hard is it to get condoms? Or to get a prescription for birth control pills? It's ridiculously easy, as a matter of fact. And still, she ends up pregnant. What's wrong with them?"
"Sometimes things happen," Lorelai murmured, and something in her tone must have alerted him, because he looked at her strangely before going back to his own problem. "Look, even if they were stupid, they are paying for their mistakes. And you said that she basically graduated from high school, got herself to be an adult in the eyes of the law, and is trying to start a new life with the baby's father? Why are you so mad?"
"He was doing so well," Luke ground out. "Not that he was doing fantastically in school or anything, but he was getting by just fine, and he was working, and he wasn't getting in trouble. By all accounts his life here is better than it ever was in New York. And now this."
"So…she's ruined his life."
"Well, not according to him…he loves her," Luke said. "But this is certainly going to change it."
Lorelai thought. "Does Jess have any friends?" Luke looked at her questioningly. "Just answer the question. Does he have any friends in Stars Hollow? Does he ever go out with friends to see a movie? Does he have anyone he hangs out with at school?"
"Well, no," Luke said. "But I don't see what that has to do with—"
She fought wistful envy as she tried to explain how she saw the situation. "Now that she's here, he's with a person he loves. Soon to be two people, if what you said was true." She bit her lip and ventured, "Maybe with her, New York was better. But without her here, Stars Hollow was just a place where he was. Now, while she and the baby are here, it's a place he wants to be. Think how much better he'll do if he wants to do this."
They sat in silence for a long time. Finally, Luke sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Maybe you're right," he said. "Maybe," he said emphatically, then sighed. "And maybe I overreacted just a little bit."
Lorelai laughed, but there was no humor in the sound, making Luke look at her hard. "Trust me, Luke, you had the normal parent's reaction to the news," she told him.
"How would you know?" Luke murmured, watching her closely. The question wasn't harsh, or even very probing. He waited.
She shifted uncomfortably on the couch, and didn't meet his eyes for a long time, until she couldn't take it anymore and looked up. She found him studying her intently, a strange comprehension in his expression.
"Lorelai," he said, gently, quietly.
"I had a baby when I was sixteen," she blurted out. She heaved a huge sigh and pressed her palms over her eyes, trying to press the threatening tears back where they had come from. "God. I haven't talked about this with anyone. I've never told anyone this, except the ones who already knew. I was such a kid. My boyfriend…he didn't want to believe it at first. Then he asked, 'What are you going to do?' and I knew I was all alone. And when I told my parents…. Now, that was a disaster. Finally, I decided what I was going to do. I gave it up for adoption." The tears broke free.
"I had a little baby girl," she sobbed, and was shocked when Luke's arms found their way around her. "I got to hold her once, then she was taken away. I was told there was a couple ready to adopt her, already in the hospital. And I was happy that she was going to people who wanted her so much, but I wanted to keep her. I wanted to keep her so badly in that one moment where I got to hold her in my arms." She raised her face to Luke. "She was so beautiful," she whispered, eyes focused on something far away.
"Then my parents came," she added, hiccuping, losing what little pleasure she had in the memories. "And they agreed she was beautiful, but told me she would ruin my life. Maybe they were right. Maybe they were wrong. I don't think it really matters any more. The worst part, though, is I don't know anything about her. I know her birthday; I know how old she is, to the day. She's seventeen years, four months and one week. I know she was born in Hartford, Connecticut. I have a daughter out there somewhere, who I know basically nothing about. And every day I see a mother with a child, I think, 'That could have been me. If I'd stuck it out, I could be that mother with that child and be happy.'" She wiped her eyes hastily with her fingertips, and chuckled.
"As if I even know it would have turned out all right," she said, and sniffed. To her surprise, she found a box of Kleenex in front of her eyes, and plucked one out of the box. "I mean, right now I could be stuck in a slum in Chicago with a kid who hated me, working a dead-end waitress job. It's useless to wonder about what might have been, isn't it? I mean, I'm here, now, crying …and soaking your nice flannel shirt."
"Don't worry about it," Luke said, rubbing her back gently. "What're friends for?"
They sat in silence broken only by Lorelai blowing her nose for a few long minutes, absorbing the new level of friendship they'd reached. "Well, I think it's amusing considering you came here to complain at me for a change," she said, obviously feeling more than a little embarrassed about her emotional purge. "And here I manage to turn it all around again." She pulled back, still sniffling.
"Actually," Luke said, "you haven't. You've given me something to think about. I'm not good at that whole perspective thing in general," he said, as if in confidence. "I think I'll go home now, apologize to them. I hope they take it, and whatever help I can give them."
"Good," Lorelai said, still wiping her nose and eyes. "Go. Apologize. Be happy. And I'll see you tomorrow."
"I'll have a special mug of coffee waiting just for you," he said, and smiled at her over his shoulder as he left.
Luke cautiously opened the door to the apartment, making sure it stayed quiet. He flinched slightly when he saw Lorelai…the younger Lorelai…and Jess lying in each other's arms on the bed. His back straightened when he saw Jess watching him without expression on his face.
Luke waited while Jess extracted himself from Lorelai, taking care not to wake her. By mutual accord, they went down into the diner, where Jess promptly took out a doughnut and started munching, waiting for his uncle to speak. "You know, I don't know anything about her," Luke said. He had a nagging suspicion that he wanted to check out. "She's been your girlfriend for…what? Over a year, year and a half, and five of those months you've lived here. And I don't know anything about her?"
"All you had to do was ask," Jess said.
"What's her full name?"
"Lorelai Lynn Collins."
"Age?"
"Seventeen."
"Birthday."
"October 8, 1984." Jess began to look amused. "Gonna break out the Chinese water torture until I give you her name, rank and social security number?"
"Where was she born?"
"Hartford, Connecticut."
Luke did some quick mental calculations. She was the right age. She looked right, and she was born in the right place. He wasn't sure he liked what conclusion he arrived at, but it was what it was. "I don't suppose she was adopted, was she?" he asked, and almost smiled when Jess choked on his doughnut, inhaling a little powdered sugar and coughing.
"I'll take that as a yes," Luke said, and raked his hand through his hair. "Did you know that Lorelai…crazy Inn-owning Lorelai is most likely your girlfriend Lorelai's birth mother?" Jess nodded, still trying to suck in air. "What…you did?" Luke demanded. Jess nodded again. In an effort to get information quicker, Luke got him some water to help clear out his throat. "How did you know that?" Luke demanded when Jess could talk again.
So Jess told him all about his Lorelai, about her adoptive parents and how she found out about her name. "I would have put it together if I'd just heard Gilmore's first name before today."
"So, what are you going to do?" Jess shrugged. "Come on, Jess," he said chidingly. "This is your kid's grandmother."
"And wouldn't she love to hear that?" Jess asked, shuddering at the very thought.
"Listen, Jess, about what I said tonight. I didn't…it was just a shock." Jess stared at his uncle, waiting. "I'll take care of Lorelai for tomorrow while you're in school. I will be apologizing to her." The two men nodded in understanding. "Now, back to the whole multiple-Lorelais situation," Luke said.
"Just call her Lori," Jess suggested. "I think she likes that, anyway."
"What I meant was do we tell them about each other," Luke said. Jess shook his head hard. "Why not?"
"We need to do some research first," Jess said. "What if they don't want to find each other? I know Lorelai hasn't said anything to me about it, but I haven't asked."
"Lorelai …er, Gilmore wants to find her," Luke said shortly. "She's regretted giving her up for years. I think it would help, though, if she heard that she'd gotten parents who loved her and that she loved. This is a small town Jess; they're going to find each other sooner or later."
"Yeah," Jess said. "Do we want to come up with a strategy for that moment?"
"Act innocent and shocked?" Luke suggested.
"Or smugly satisfied, as if we'd planned it all out that way."
"That might get us lynched."
"Good point." Jess sighed. "I love her, Luke," he said, quietly, not looking at the older man. "And I love the baby. I can't wait to be there for her." Luke nodded, and the two went upstairs for some much-needed sleep.
