Usagi sat facing the rising sun. Tears stained her cheeks. The one person she had put all her faith in had completely torn it all. Alone. Burnt. Betrayed. All of these feelings were rushing into her heart, and the only feeling leaking out? Whatever she had left of hope.

Human beings are nothing without hope. Hope is what gets us to another day. Hope is what gets us up in the morning when everything else has torn down all of our walls of security. When all Usagi's walls of security and comfort had been torn down, Mamoru was always there to open a door and let her into his castle. So why had he permanently closed the drawbridge and locked the gate?

Personally, she was glad no one knew where she was. She wanted to be alone. She wanted to die alone. Isn't that a request worth granting?

Usagi sat on the top level of Tokyo Tower. Why did she choose to die here, of all places? Because this is where she and Mamoru had found out each other's "secret identities". This is where they had learned about their past. This is where they learned that fate willed them to be together.

So, if fate willed them to be together, why has she been pushed away? Why was this so called "destiny" pushing her back out to the wallows of loneliness? At least he had Rei to run back to. At least, when everything had been done, he could still run to her for support. For comfort. For. other things that every man needed.

Damn it, why was this happening to her? What about karma? What had she done to deserve this?

And what about her? Rei. She was supposed to be her best friend. The only one of her senshi that even called her "Usagi" without "chan" or "san". That was supposed to mean they were close. CLOSE. Close friends don't sleep with the other's husband. It just doesn't happen that way. That's totally against the rules.

The sun had finally fully risen. It had been a little over twenty-four hours now since she found them. The twenty-four hours after that, leading to now, had gone by in such a blur. She had ran back to the castle, written in her diary and left it out for Mamoru to see, grabbed a knife from the kitchen, not explaining anything to the kitchen staff, and left. She didn't want him to get home before she left and see her. She didn't want him to see her. She didn't want to see him.

She sniffled, wiping a few tears away. It was time. She raised her knife and looked at the way the sunlight hit it, making it sparkle. How beautiful in instrument of death could be. She closed her eyes. And brought her hand down to her stomach.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Mamoru jerked his eyes open as if on que. He sat up quickly, looking around. Nothing in the room. He looked at his clock. 7:28 AM. He breathed in. he hadn't meant to fall asleep. His hands clenched the sheets as if holding on for dear life. He looked down at them. His knuckles were white. He looked down at his hands and released the cold silk that he clutched. He hands were shaking uncontrollably. Turning them over slowly, he saw blood. Red stained the palm of his hand, and led down to his wrists, where he saw two great scars. Each drawing a line of hate over his barren arm. Hate was such a strong word. But he really did hate himself right now.

She trusted him. She trusted him with all of her, and she never doubted anything he said. If he told her the world would end tomorrow because he saw a premonition, she would believe him. Without a second thought.

She was devoted to him. She never even did so much as to look at another man with interest. When there were balls, or parties, her eyes never wandered. They were glued to his.

Come to think of it, he was devoted with such a passion to her also. Before last night of course. They both held onto each other with their eyes that it was as if they were both treasure hunters, and had both found the rarest jewel in the world. It was the kind of love that people envied. Envied with a great deal of hate. So many people did hate the royal couple. Because they had the kind of love that no one else could even understand. Centuries of love that had surpassed even the changing of the universe.

So what had gone wrong? Temptation. In every fairy tale there is a villain. Rei wasn't the villain. She probably fell prisoner to temptation also. Maybe that's how it all had worked out.

He lied back down in his bed, looking up at the ceiling. This was the first time he had ever been in this bed - their bed - alone. Without her. And now that he was without her, everything was so empty in the room. He noticed how dark the walls were. They were painted black and high glossed, so they shone when any stray strands of light would hit. And the sheets, all of the bedding in fact, were silk. Dark, royal blue silk.

The silk caressed his skin and hung to his every muscle. He ran a hand over his bare chest, breathing in deeply. Releasing, he closed his eyes, and a pinprick of a tear escaped. He was so stupid. And he knew it. Knowledge comes with death's release. He wanted to knowledge of why he had been so stupid. So he tried to kill himself. Besides, he had lost his world. She had been his world and now he had hurt her. If she was dead now, he had killed her. He was a murderer.

He rolled over, placing his head on her pillow. He breathed in her intoxicating scent and remembered all that they had been through. All the memories. Saving the universe. I mean hey, what can bring a couple closer than that?

His whole entire body shook, and he drew his knees to his chest. He clutched her pillow tighter to his face and began crying. The pure lamentation of this act was so much to make anyone miserable. He sobbed. A man wasn't supposed to cry. But who cares now?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

She stirred her tea. Her hair was, once again, up in a messy bun with a few strands framing her face. She shouldn't have done that to Usagi. She knew she shouldn't have. Everything you see in the fire isn't always what will happen. So basically, knowing that, she was the one that caused everything. Now her best friend wanted to die. And Mamoru probably did too. She felt awful. Having ruined two peoples lives.

She sipped her tea and sighed, pulling her robes tighter around her. The morning fog was chilly. She sighed, and could see the breath she exhaled. She lowered her head and closed her eyes. Why had she been so stupid? Goddamn.

She stood slowly and set her tea down. Taking a few steps foreword, she sighed again. She lowered herself and picked up the bamboo stick that sat in front of her. She quickly shot up and swung it at a tree, making all of the birds in it call out and fly away. Then she climbed the tree and sat in the top branches.

She was so stupid.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

There was a knock at the door. "What is it?" Mamoru cried out between sobs, trying to calm himself.

"Lord, may I come in?" he noticed the voice as Artemis. All three cats had remained in human form since the defeat of Galaxia.

"Sure, I guess"

Mamoru didn't even try to straighten himself up. Artemis had become his best friend, and he didn't worry what he thought. He was the only one that he even would allow to enter the room right now.

Artemis pulled out a chair from Usagi's desk and sat in it, staring at Mamoru, who was a mess.

"Your highness, please -"

"Oh cut out the highness shit."

"Sorry, I was trying to be respectful"

"What did you want?"

"Well, I was hoping you could tell me what happened."

And so the story began. Artemis stayed silent and listened to everything Mamoru said. He nodded.

"And then. oh gods Artemis and then she walked in. and she saw us, naked together."

"That's pretty bad."

Mamoru fell back to the bed, and started crying again.

"And now, now ive lost my entire world because of one night."

"But you said Rei told you something that wasn't expected would happen. Right?"

Mamoru nodded into Usagi's pillow.

"Well, maybe she knew about it. Maybe that's what she was talking about."

"But. why wouldn't she try to stop it?"

"Maybe she wanted it to happen. You two did date for quite a while."

Mamoru stayed silent.

"What happened after Usagi left?"

"I sat there for a moment, thinking about everything that had just happened. Rei looked at the floor. Then I just got up, put on my pants, and left."

"And then?"

"I got back here, and she was gone. Her journal was lying on the bed."

"Did you read it?"

"Yeah. the last page was left flipped open to."

"Mind if I see?"

Mamoru pulled back the covers, and reached into his pocket, bringing out the folded, now ratty piece of paper, and handed it to Artemis.

Artemis read through it once. Then he read through it again. He sighed and folded the paper back up, handing it to Mamoru.

"Well, there's only one thing to do."

"What could I possibly do?"

"Look for her."

"Artemis, it's been twenty four hours. She's probably. by now."

"There's no sure evidence about that"

"Well, the senshi are out looking for her right now too."

"Stop making excuses not to see her."

"But what would I say to her?"

"Think about it while you're out looking."

Mamoru blinked a few times, wiping away a few last tears.

"What ever happens, you can't just leave her out there. Ive seen you two together, and the way that you are, you cant just let this end everything."

"But how could she forgive me? Ive done the unspeakable."

"You have to try."

Mamoru nodded once again, and stood up, gathering clothes from random places around the room.

"Artemis?"

"Yes?"

"Will you help me?"

"Look for her?"

"Yeah"

"No. I cant do that."

"But what if I don't find her?"

"I think you know where she is."

"Do you?"

"No."

"Then what makes you so sure that I know?"

"Because your souls are connected."

Mamoru understood and nodded again, heading out.

"Artemis?"

"Yes?"

"Thanks."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

There. That's about 2000 words. That's going to be my goal for each chapter. 2000 words. Not counting the first journal entry though, that was like, separate. Anyway, I want to thank the five people I woke up to having reviews to read.

Balticbard - THANKS^_^! Im going to read your stories soon. I promise!

Cat - yes, im sure I don't really like Mamoru that much either. I kinda do though. I haven't decided yet.

Sed - im sorry, I really cant say what the pairing will be yet. That would give away the entire story. I do hope you'll keep reading though, I would hate to loose one of my few precious readers. Besides, to tell you the truth, I don't know myself how this story is going to go. I have a few ideas, but those usually change when I get in front of the keyboard. Sorry!

And Marni - * YOU * decide if Rei is regretful. Its your choice, you being the reader, to decide how you think the characters are acting.

AND AN EXTRA SPECIAL THANK YOU TO MARY ANNE! Im so glad someone got into my story enough to rant, so thank you so much for ranting, and don't apologize for it! I appreciate it a lot.

I hope you all keep up with the story! Having readers inspires me to write more!

~*~ * clears throat and gets announcerish voice *

Is Usagi dead? Will Mamoru find her body first? What will Rei do out off guilt? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ONNNNNNN.. SEDUCTION AND SUICIDE!!

~SB * stay tuned^_^ *