PART SIX

The Tale of Sir Ryou

So, each of the duelists went their separate ways. Sir Ryou rode north, through the dark forest of the Kingdom, accompanied by his favorite minstrels.

A minstrel sang, following Sir Ryou. Bravely bold Sir Ryou, rode forth from Domino.
He was not afraid die, oh brave Sir Ryou.
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways.
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Ryou!

He was not in the least bit scared to be sent to the Shadow Realm,
Or to have his brain mind crushed, and his poor soul broken.
To have his monsters split, and his body burned away,
And his yami torture him, oh brave Sir Ryou!

His ring smashed in and his heart cut out
And his duel deck removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his sweater burned off
And his pe-

Ryou interrupted the minstrel with a gesture. That's enough singing for now, lads. Looks like there's dirty work afoot.

The troupe rode forward, past signs that warned of impending death and doom and other such sundry things.

A voice echoed through the forest. Sir Ryou froze in his tracks, looking up at the three headed monstrosity. It was blue, and dragon shaped. Say, come to think of it, it was a dragon...

Who art thou? It asked.

The minstrel jumped in. He is brave Sir Ryou, brave Sir Ryou, who-

Shut up! Ryou hissed. N-n-no one, really. I-I'm just p-p-passing through.

What do you want? The three headed dragon asked.

To fight, and-

Shut up! Um, er...nothing really, just to -p-pass through.

The three headed one spoke again. I'm afraid not!

Well, actually, I am a duelist of the Domino Arena. Ryou stammered.

All three heads focused on him.

You're a Duelist of the Arena?

I am.

In that case, we shall have to kill you. The dragon's left head said smugly.

Shall I? asked the middle head.

No, I don't think so. answered the right.

Well, what do I think? the middle head again.

The left spoke: I think kill him.

The right replied, Oh, let's be nice to him. He's so fuzzy.

Oh, shut up. from the left.

Ryou began, Perhaps I could-

Shut up! Oh, quick, get the sword out! I want to cut his head off! Left again.

Oh, cut your own head off! yelled the right.

The middle agreed. Yes, do us all a favor.

The heads went on like this for some time, until...

We'll have tea, not rice cakes, but let's kill him anyway!

The other two agreed.

Ryou was nowhere to be found.

He buggered off! The right head was outraged. So outraged, in fact, that it toasted a nearby tree with white lightning.

So he has.


The minstrel hopped and skipped as he sang. Brave Sir Ryou ran away.



Bravely ran away away...

I didn't!

When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled...



Yes, Sir Ryou turned about...

I didn't!

And gallantly he chickened out, bravely taking to his feet...

I never did!

He beat a very brave retreat.

All lies!

I never!