PART SEVEN
The Tale of Sir Otogi
Thunder crashed, lightning flared through the sky. Sir Otogi stumbled up a grassy slope, brushing thorny bushes out of his way. As he looked up, he saw a castle crowning the hill, with a glowing, card-shaped light above it.
He pounded on the door, imploring the denizens to allow him entry to the dwelling. Open the door! In the name of King Yugi, open the door!
The door creaked open ominously.
A chorus of female voices greeted him.
One stepped forward, with long honey colored hair. Welcome, gentle sir knight, to Castle Lemon.
Castle Lemon? the soaked Otogi was a bit taken aback.
It's not a very good name, is it? Oh, but we are nice and we will attend to your every, every need! She reassured him.
You are the keepers of the Head of Exodia? Otogi panted.
The what? she asked.
The Head of Exodia. It is here.
She cooed softly, violet eyes twinkling. Oh, but you are weary, and you must rest. Harpy Sisters! She clapped her hands twice.
The two in question appeared. Yes, o, Mai?
Prepare a bed for our guest.
The bowed rapidly. Thank you, oh thank you! Thank you!
Away, sisters. Mai waved them off. The beds here are soft, and warm, and very, very big...
Otogi stuttered a few incomprehensible syllables.
What is your name, good sir knight?
Sir Otogi...the Pure.
Mai giggled. Mine is Mai. Just Mai, but come. She led him up the stairs.
Otogi stopped. In Shadi's name, show me the Head of Exodia!
Mai stroked his head. Oh, but you are delirious. she purred. You musn't refuse our hospitality.
Otogi blinked. Well, er, I, uh...
Mai sighed. How very dull our lives must seem. Cooped up in a castle all day, dressing, undressing, bathing, making exciting underwear. We are not used to bishonen duelists like yourself. Otogi stumbled. Oh, but you are wounded!
No, it's nothing. Otogi protested.
You must see our doctors. Mai insisted firmly, and pushed him down on the bed. She clapped again, and two more girls appeared. One, in a blue suit of armor with a pink skirt, and an odd hat. The second, in a long green robe. Her skin was blue.
What seems to be the trouble? Questioned the first.
Otogi looked at them incredulously. They're doctors!?
Mai shifted her gaze. They have a basic medical training, yes. Rest, now. Doctor Magician Girl! Doctor Mystical Elf! Practice your art.
The two oddly-dressed doctors moved toward Sir Otogi. They reached out to remove his clothes...
Are you sure that's absolutely necessary? Otogi sidled away from them.
The Magician Girl frowned at him cutely. We must examine you. She reached out again...
There's nothing wrong with that! He scurried out of the way as they reached for his personal dragon.
Please. We are doctors. The girl was very patient.
Otogi curled up tightly. Look here. I'm sworn to focus only on my game, okay? He flipped his hair out of the way.
Back to your bed! Immediately! The Magician Girl scolded him, bending low to reveal her impressive cleavage.
Otogi shielded his eyes. Torment me no longer! I know the Head is here! I have seen it! He ran from the room. I have seen-
The chorus of dozens of women filled his ears.
Otogi saw the familiar face among the sea of girls.
She shook her head. No, I am Mai's identical twin sister, Iam.
Otogi apologized. Oh, well excuse me, I-
Where are you going? Iam' stepped in front of him.
I seek the Head of Exodia! It is here! I have seen it!
Iam looked distressed. Oh, no. Oh no! Bad Mai, naughty Mai! I have just remembered that our beacon is card shaped. It's not the first time we've had this problem.
It's not the real Head?
Naughty, wicked Mai! She is bad and must pay the penalty. Here in Castle Lemon, we have only one punishment. You must tie her to a bed and spank her.
A spanking! A spanking! The other girls chorused.
Yes. And once you have spanked her, you may do with her as you like. And when you are finished, you must spank me. Iam said.
And me!
And me!
And me!
Yes, yes, you must give us all a good spanking. And after the spanking, the Oral Sex. Iam continued.
Otogi relented. Well, I could stay a bit longer.
Just then, Sir Jounouchi charged into the room. Sir Otogi!
Oh, hello. Otogi blinked.
Quick! You are in great peril! Jounouchi tugged on Otogi's arm.
No he isn't. Iam insisted.
Silence, foul temptress! Jounouchi hauled Otogi down the stairs. Come on! We will cover your escape!
I'm fine! I can tackle this lot single handed! Otogi protested.
Yes! Let him tackle us single handed! the girls chimed in, following after the fleeing knights.
I can handle this lot easily! Otogi pleaded.
Oh, yes, let him handle us easily!
Please! I can defeat them! There's only a hundred and fifty of them!
Yes, yes! Let him defeat us! We haven't a chance!
The door slammed shut, carrying Otogi and Jounouchi with it.
Iam pouted. Oh, shit.
Jounouchi dragged the kicking Otogi away from Castle Lemon. We were in the nick of time. You were in terrible peril.
I don't think I was. complained Otogi.
Oh yes you were. Great peril.
Let me go back and face the peril.
No, it's too perilous.
Look, it's my duty to sample all the peril I can.
No, no, we've got to find the Head of Exodia.
Can't I have just a little bit of peril?
Sometimes I think you're gay.
I am not.
