Disclaimers in Part 1
Those pretty wrongs that liberty commits,
When I am sometime absent from thy heart,
Thy beauty, and thy years full well befits,
For still temptation follows where thou art.
Gentle thou art, and therefore to be won,
Beauteous thou art, therefore to be assailed;
And when a woman woos, what woman's son
Will sourly leave her till he have prevailed?
Ay me! But yet thou mightst my seat forbear,
And chide thy beauty and thy straying youth,
Who lead thee in their riot even there
Where thou art forced to break a twofold truth:
Hers, by thy beauty tempting her to thee,
Thine, by thy beauty being false to me.
--Sonnet 41
Saturday, 9 November 2002
Bethesda Naval Hospital
Bethesda, MD
2130 ZULU
"Harriet, Bud! Hi!" Mac tried to be extra cheerful to hide her nervousness and disappointment.
"Good afternoon, Colonel, Admiral," Harriet replied in a soft voice. 'Darn it! And they were so close to admitting it, too! That's it...time for plan B. But what's plan B? Think, Harriet, think...'
"Umm...sir? Commander Rabb is downstairs; he's having a little trouble getting up here."
AJ groaned. "Well, I guess I better go help him then, huh?" He squeezed Mac's hand, and then released it. "Should I let him up, Mac?"
"Please, sir. I need to talk to him sometime. Now is as good a time as any," Mac sighed.
AJ smiled weakly, and left.
Harriet turned to her husband. "Bud, could you please go down to the vending machines and get me a soda?"
Bud looked at her quizzically, but answered, "Sure, Harriet." Satisfied that her husband would be busy for a few minutes, Harriet faced Mac.
"So, Harriet, how was your day?" Mac asked her, trying to derail the conversation before it left the station.
Harriet decided the best way to get it through Mac's head was to put it bluntly. "He's in love with you, you know."
The only thing that changed in Mac's posture was her hands. They tightened on the book in her lap.
"Who, Harm?" She decided to play dumb. Hopefully, Harriet hadn't noticed their odd behavior a few minutes ago.
Harriet glared at her. "You know who I'm talking about, Mac."
Mac was surprised, but not much. Harriet was stronger than she looked. What had really surprised her, though, was that Harriet had used her name without being prompted.
"Harriet, it's not going to happen," Mac said quietly, looking down.
"Why not? You're not going to work for him forever." She took Mac's hands in hers. "Mac, you are both wonderful people, and you both deserve a little happiness. I think he can make you happy. Am I right?"
Mac blinked back tears. "I--I don't know..."
"Mac..." Harriet lifted Mac's chin, and asked gently, "You're in love with him, too, aren't you?"
Mac's tears spilled over. "I...I...yes!" she finally admitted to both Harriet--and to herself. 'Oh, god, I am! I am in love with him! Now what do I do...?'
Harriet took her friend in an embrace. "Don't worry, Mac; it'll work out." 'I'll make sure of it!' she vowed silently.
Saturday, 9 November 2002
Bethesda Naval Hospital
Bethesda, MD
2135 ZULU
"Commander Rabb," AJ called sharply.
Harm spun on his heels and came to attention as he spotted his commanding officer.
"As you were. Lieutenant, is there a problem here?"
"Well, sir, umm...ah, no; no problem," the nurse stammered.
"Well, then can Commander Rabb get in for once without being harassed by hospital staff?" AJ asked in an irritated voice.
"Of course, sir."
"Good. Commander, with me."
They walked to the elevators and boarded. AJ looked at Harm and said, "We need to have a talk; but later. Right now, Colonel Mackenzie would like to have a word with you. I don't need to remind you about what will happen if you do anything to disturb her, do I?"
"No, sir, you don't." Harm was about to either suffocate from the pressure in his chest, or hyperventilate from anxiety over the upcoming conversations. He called on all of his lawyer and pilot skills, however, and projected a sense of calm--or, at least, tried to.
AJ grinned evilly. 'Good. He's nervous. Let 'im sweat.'
They proceeded to Mac's hospital room.
Saturday, 9 November 2002
Bethesda Naval Hospital
Bethesda, MD
2145 ZULU
Harriet, Bud, and Mac were sitting in Mac's room, regaling each other with stories about their friends. Mac and Bud were currently entertaining Harriet with the story of Harm's prowess with semi-automatic weaponry. All three were in stitches. Mac abruptly stopped laughing.
"Hello, Harm," she said softly.
"Mac," he replied hesitantly.
AJ, Harriet, even Bud caught the sudden rise in tension. "Let's go, Lieutenants," AJ commanded quietly.
As the door closed behind the three, Harm asked, "So, how you doin', Mac?"
"How do you think, Harm? Although, I suppose you wouldn't know, considering the fact that you haven't even tried to contact me," Mac answered coldly.
Still not making eye contact, "I didn't think you would want me to call you, not after..." He trailed off.
"I don't know, Harm, but it sure would've been nice if you had showed some concern. I mean, even Webb was worried a little. The Admiral says he stayed until I got out of the OR, even with his broken nose."
Harm snapped back, "Yeah, it seems like the Admiral's been very worried about you as well."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Mac hauled herself out of bed, and stood directly in front of Harm.
"What do you think it means?" he replied snidely.
Mac's jaw dropped. "How dare you?! Do you really think I'm that stupid? Or the Admiral is, for that matter? He would never put his integrity on the line like that! And I'm not that woman anymore. I wouldn't get involved with a superior officer any more than you would, Harm. You know, I you're not the man I thought you were. If you can't forgive my past transgressions, then perhaps we shouldn't even be friends. I was ready to forgive your little dalliance with that Hannah woman. We could have worked through it, because I realize that people make mistakes."
"Mac, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I guess I'm just jealous."
"You're right, you shouldn't have. Harm, I've done some things in the past that I'm not proud of. But...how could you accuse Admiral Chegwidden of such a thing? I mean, he has to be the most honorable man I know! You really ought to think before making unsubstantiated accusations against anyone, especially your CO. And you no longer have the right to be jealous, remember?"
"I remember. Mac, are you sure that we can't work things out? I'm really sorry, and it will never happen again. I love you." Harm finally looked at Mac.
Mac could feel her resolve crumbling under Harm's gaze, but summoned her strength. "No, Harm; it's too late for that. Perhaps before you accused me of having an improper relationship with my CO, but...you attacked my personal honor, Harm. I just can't live with that. Maybe you do love me, but Harm...you're not in love with me. I love you too, Harm." He opened his mouth to speak, but Mac said, "No, let me finish. I love you too, but I'm not in love with you, either. You hurt me too much for those feelings to exist in my heart. This is the last time I'm going to let you pull me in. I'm breaking away, before you can push me back."
"Please, Mac...forgive me. I'm sorry for hurting you."
Mac smiled sadly. "I'll try, flyboy. But the forgetting? I don't know about that." She leaned up to kiss Harm's cheek. "Goodbye, Harm."
He kissed her forehead. "Goodbye...Sarah." He turned and left, closing the door behind him.
Mac collapsed in a chair beside the bed. She was exhausted, from both the physical and emotional exertion, but her mind was going a mile a minute. Harm's insinuation had hit a little too close to home. After all, hadn't she, not ten minutes ago, professed her love for her CO? And Harriet had said... 'No, Mac. Don't even go there. It's not possible.' A little voice in her head argued, But Harriet is perceptive about these things; besides, she wouldn't lie to you.' She sat in introspection for many moments.
A few minutes later, Bud and Harriet returned, without AJ. Mac looked up, surprised that she hadn't heard them come in. "Where's the Admiral?" she asked.
Harriet and Bud exchanged a look. "He's having a...chat...with Commander Rabb, ma'am."
Mac grinned in spite of herself. "Good. Maybe he can knock some sense into him."
