AN: *sighs* Another short chappie... but I was just wanting to update during the week instead of waiting for the weekend so yeah... and this chapter is a little weird because it has first person point of views... and there are going to be more parts like this coming up ^-^ And this is going to be closer to 20 than 10... so enjoy! And please R&R!!
Posted: May 13, 2003


Lost Memories - Hidden Emotions
Part Seven

Walking into the restaurant, I find Mika and Touma already waiting for me. The place is deserted, it being this early in the morning, but I have a feeling I'm going to be here for a while. With a quiet sigh I head over to where they are now standing. "What do you want?" I ask, putting just enough frost in my voice to let them know I am not happy to be here.

Touma just smiles at me; that damn smile he uses on everyone else; the one where you can't see his eyes. I hate that smile; it means he's either angry or lying. It's nothing but a manipulative mask and I want nothing more than to reach over and smack him, but I resist and glance at my sister instead. She stares back at me, not in the least affected by my glare.

"You know what we want, Eiri," she replies quietly, before they both sit down. Reluctantly I take my seat as well; if I'm going to be miserable, I might as well be somewhat comfortable while I'm at it.

A server comes over and I order a coke, even though I know I'm going to need a scotch by the time I'm done here. I sit back, glaring at both of them as I wait for them to start talking.



He looks worse than he did when I last saw him. Not to mention he looks angry on top of that. He has a habit of clenching his fist and staring coldly when he's mad. I silently curse Shuichi for doing this to the person I love the most. I swear he'll be the death of Eiri-san one of these days. I cannot allow that. I have to get them away from each other as soon as I possibly can. I will not see Eiri-san hurt again, especially when I can help it.

Then again, I suppose I should just let Eiri-san live his own life; he's not the kid that he used to be, after all... But that would mean giving up and admitting defeat. And if there's one thing Seguchi Touma never does, it's admitting defeat. Especially when I know my way is for the best.



They're staring at each other. I can sense the tension between them and it's never been this bad before. I sigh quietly and glance at my brother, looking in his eyes, and I'm surprised to find a glimmer of life within them. I bite the inside of my cheek thoughtfully as I study him. There are a few other subtle changes as well. His frown isn't quite as harsh as it used to be, as if he's learned to smile again, and he looks healthier. His eyes though, stand out like a spotlight, and my own keep being drawn back to them.

When he got back from New York, his eyes were dull and cold, dead even, and seemed to promise death to anyone who got too close; even to me, his sister. I think that's when I realised he wasn't as little as he had been. He had been forced to grow up under extreme and dark circumstances. And his pride wouldn't let him accept help, so he chose to push everyone away instead of letting someone get close to him...

His eyes were like those of a wounded animal, hurt too much to be able to trust even those of his own kind... Then he decided to go away to Tokyo, to get away and start his own life. And I had to let him go, even though I knew it couldn't possibly be for the best. I wasn't his mother, though after she died, I became a kind of figure-head to him and Tatsuha. It was hard, having both of them looking up to me.

I believed I had failed to protect Eiri when he told me he was leaving, but I made no move to stop him, knowing it was his choice, and that he wouldn't listen to me anyway, what with what was going on between him and father. So he left, and I had to keep an eye on him from a distance. He didn't appreciate that, and his eyes kept getting colder and harder the more I pushed him.

I was almost giving up hope on ever seeing him even smirk again, but now I realise that someone else has been able to reach the true Eiri, and has been able to begin drawing him out. I feel a pang of jealousy at the fact that it wasn't me, but if being around Shuichi can do that to him in such a short time, I'm more than willing to keep them together for eternity. Touma won't be happy, but it doesn't matter. I love my husband dearly, but Eiri is my flesh and blood, and he more than deserves this chance at happiness.



"How have you been, Eiri?" asked Mika, breaking the silence between them.

"Cut with the small talk and get on with your lectures so I can leave," Yuki replied coldly, taking the coke that the waiter brought back. He caught the slight flash of hurt that appeared in her eyes, but he ignored it.

"Eiri-san," said Touma in an almost scolding tone. Whatever he was going to say was cut off when Mika kicked him lightly under the table. He briefly glanced at her in curiosity, but her attention was on Yuki.

"Eiri, you know I only want what's best for you," she said quietly.

"All I know is you're obsessing over my life."

"Eiri!"

He glared at her, daring her to contradict him. When neither of them said anything, he snickered and looked away. He took a drink and stood to leave. "Well then, I'll be getting back to my life," he said, turning and heading for the door.

"Uesugi Eiri, don't you dare walk away!" cried Mika, slamming her hands on the table as she stood. She straightened, eyes widening slightly in surprise at her outburst and glanced away when he turned to glance at her. "Gomen..." she said quietly.

Yuki looked at her, eyes narrowed in curiosity. He glanced at Touma and found he looked almost amused by her exclamation and for some reason that made him angry. With a quiet sigh he retook his seat, listening with half an ear as they started advising him on how to live his life.