I broke my promise, I'm reeeeeeeeally sorry! Okay guys! It's the part you've all been waiting for- the concluding chapter to Kurt hands!!!!!

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Kurt was wandering around aimlessly, trying not to worry about Kitty. Her fingers looked awful, she must have jammed them in those airlock doors in the danger room.

"I wonder where she is now" Kurt said out loud and decided to try and find her, she needed some ice on her hand.

He was just walking past Xaviers room when he heard his name being whispered tearfully.

"Aw hell. They're talking about me again" Kurt groaned and put his ear to the door. Unknown to the others, Kurt did know about the lab Logan had visited and everything else they had talked about that day. He'd been listening in the whole time, it served them right for not telling him!

"We didn't want to hurt his feelings" Jean was sobbing

"We were just curious" Evan said defensively

"I think you have both acted immaturely and insensitively" Xavier's voice said coldly

"We thought.....heck professor, I don't know what we were thinking" Evan sighed

Kurt's brow creased in confusion, what was going on? What were they curious about? How had they acted insensitively?

"Kurt? What are you doing?" Rogue asked walking along the corridor

"Nothing!" Kurt cried stood up straight very suddenly

Rogue raised an eyebrow at him and Kurt sighed deeply

"Okay, maybe I am listening in on the professor talking to Jean and Evan" He blushed

Rogue laughed cruelly

"They are so busted!" she laughed punching the air "What're they saying? What's the professor sayin'?"

"Um, that they acted immaturely and insensitively, jean sounds like she's been crying" Kurt indicated towards the door "Do you know what they did?"

"Ummmmm..." Rogue looked uncomfortable "Yes- but I had nothing to do with it!" she defended herself instantly

Kurt groaned

"I'm going to be hurt by this aren't I?" he asked

"Most probably" Rogue sighed

"Great, okay" Kurt took a deep breath in and flexed a few muscles "Go"

"What was that?" Rogue asked

"Preparing for the emotional blow now please go" Kurt said sharply

"Okay...kittyjeanandevanusedcellotapetogivethemselvesthreefingers" she said all at once "You 'aint getting' anymore outta me"

"I haven't got anything out of you now! I didn't understand a word you said!" Kurt complained

"Okay, I'll try again" Rogue said slower "Evan, Jean and Kitty all put cello tape around their fingers" she looked at Kurt's confused expression "You don't have a clue about what that means do you?"

"Your mouth opens, words come out...yet...nothing" Kurt said sadly

"They've made it so that they basically only have three digits, just like you" Rogue prepared for his reaction

"That's why they've been acting so weird? Because they're imitating me?" Kurt asked

"yes"

There was complete silence for a second

"BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!!!!" Kurt screamed with laughter while rolling around on the floor

"Okay I wasn't expectin' that" Rogue muttered

"Ohh! You thought I'd be all upset!" Kurt grinned

"Well, ya!" She cried

"I'd be upset if they were genuinely being malicious but they were just curious, they didn't set out to hurt me" Kurt sniggered "Besides, from their voices I think they've been through enough, and it's not like Xaviers not going to punish them for doing all this behind my back"

Rogue took Kurt's hand and took him to a quiet area in the building, she looked around to make sure no one was listening.

"What I mean is" she whispered "why not use this to your advantage?"

"huh?" Kurt asked

"Look, they'll be feelin' plenty guilty. The prof will want to punish them but what if YOU decided how they were punished?"

A spark lit up in Kurt's eyes and he smiled cruelly

"This is going to be fun" he laughed

"Come on, I think we both know what you're going to do"

they both ran back to Xavier's room

"Ready?" Rogue asked

"Wait" Kurt licked two fingers and rubbed them under his eyes giving this impression that he was on the verge of tears

"You've done this before" Rogue stated

"I'm an attention seeking elf, of course I've done this before" he replied

Rogue opened the door dramatically, cutting Jean off mid sentence

"I've told Kurt everything!" she cried "All about the tape and the teasing and how you attacked him in the living room"

"That was you guys?" Kurt asked in surprise "I mean - how could you?! Life has been cru-el enough to me already! I thought you'd understand how self conscious I am!" His hand flew to his forehead and he whimpered very convincingly

Of course this wouldn't work on Xavier but Kurt could see that he was hiding a smile and took that as an invitation to continue

"All my life I have suffered for the way I look but I never thought - my own friends!" he buried his head in his hands as if it was all too much

"We didn't mean to hurt you Kurt!" Jean practically sobbed

"Yeah Crawler, we were just messin'" Evan said in a sorrowful tone "We're so sorry"

"Being sorry does not return my dignity!" Kurt howled "I can barely even face you now that I know how you truly feel about me"

"I DID IT!!" Kitty suddenly screamed coming in through the window "I'M SORRY! I DID IT TOO! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE THE INSTITUTE KURT!!"

"Leave?" Kurt asked loosing his character for a bit "Why would I leave?"

"Because we were so mean" Kitty was crying now "You'll go back to Germany because your parents don't want you to stay with Kids who tease you"

"I'm not going back to Germany Kitty" Kurt sighed "wait a sec, this room is on the third floor, how'd you get up here?"

"With great difficulty" Kitty answered and finally heaved herself into the room "We're so sorry Kurt"

"I have no doubt that you ALL are but that does not change that you lied to everyone, attacked Kurt, caused me to believe that the mansion was being attacked and managed to throw the whole institute into an uproar" Xavier said disapprovingly "Kurt, because all of this was aimed at you I will allow you to decide an appropriate punishment"

"I don't mind Professor" Kurt sighed dramatically "I'll just go to my room and brood for a while" he turned to trudge sadly out of the room (Rogue even thought he was faking a limp)

"Kurt!" Kitty cried "Please let us make it up to you, I mean, after we get this cello tape off"

Kurt stopped and turned around

"You haven't got it off yet?"

"Uh," Kitty blushed "No, I ripped one lot off but it's on very tightly"

"Kitty! You can phase through it!" Kurt yelled "And you could have gotten everyone else's off the same way!"

Evan, Jean and Kitty both started gawping at Kurt realising that he'd just pointed out the obvious

"Oh yes" Kurt carried on "And because you all went outside I'm assuming you thought you couldn't use the doors, even though Jean's telekinetic"

The three winced again

"And couldn't Evan have snapped his cello tape in two by popping a spike through his fingers?"

"Oh.....my.....God" Evan gasped

"And even if you forgot to use your powers isn't there a fountain outside that you could have used to get the cello tape off?" Kurt was enjoying this more than he should have

"Uh! We are such idiots!" Jean moaned

"Indeed you are but that still does not decide your punishment" Xavier sighed

"Don't worry professor X, I have just the thing" Kurt grinned broadly

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"Lemonade Kurt?" Kitty sighed

"Come again Kitty? I don't think you called me by the right name" Kurt grinned laying on a sun bench with dark sunglasses.

"Lemonade Kurt oh sexy elf?" Kitty said through gritted teeth

"That's better and yes please" Kurt held out his glass and Kitty filled it, she was wearing a grass skirt

"Hey! Watch with the fanning, you're messin' up mah hair!" Rogue complained. Jean was fanning her with palm leaves also in a grass skirt

"Yes Ma'am" Jean groaned

"Where's Evan?" Kurt turned to his sister

"He's cleaning the gutters with a toothbrush"

"In a grass skirt?" he asked hopefully

"You know it" they both laughed evilly and clinked lemonade glasses

Epilogue

"Today I had to wash Scott's car with a paintbrush" Kitty groaned

"Kurt gave me a cook book and showed me what he wanted for lunch" Jean sighed

"That's not so bad" Evan said stretching

"The cook book was in German" The other two made sympathetic noises

"I had to clean his holowatches" Evan said and put one on, he instantly was covered with the image of a human looking Kurt

"Cool, lemme have a go" Kitty giggled and tried it on "How do I look?"

"Like Kurt" Jean said simply

"Say, I wonder what it would be like to actually be Kurt for the day" Evan said

"That'd be too cool!" Kitty laughed

"Why don't we try it?" Jean said "Why not?" she asked at their confused expressions

"Hmmm" Kitty said looking at the watch she was still wearing

"Okay guys" Kurt said walking in "You've got two days of probation left and they're going to be fun. Guys? Why are you looking at me like that? And what's Evan doing with that rope?"

Fin!

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Do you guys want me to do the sequal? Feel free to ask me to do it, I've got coursework and all my other fics but I'd really enjoy doing "Kurt's not Kurt!". I'll only do it if enough people ask though. Thank you to EVERYONE who's reviewed this fic