Author: The Wanlorn
Title: A World in a Grain of Sand 21/?
Summary: This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"
Rating: R for rape. Sort of. m/m
Spoilers: I honestly don't know, so beware.
Distribution: Ask, and ye shall receive. Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Disclaimer: Same as all of the last times, so far. I'm just having fun with them.
Thank Yous: Thanks to Carla, my beta. Thanks to all my reviewers who feed my addiction. And a special thanks goes out to the guy who calls himself Jander (no relation to the one in this fic), for being there for me and patiently listening while I rant about the asses at my school. If it weren't for him, you guys wouldn't be getting this chapter. Or any more chapters. Ever.
Author's Note: This is shorter than the other chapters have been because I wanted to end it at that particular spot. And I'm telling you people right now - the next chapter or two is probably going to be heavily on the Abel-oriented side. I need to play around with him and Nire and Jander for a bit more, and write something fun. So don't y'all go yelling at me because of it. I'm giving you a fair warning.
Chapter Twenty-One
Nire turned to watch Nick go up the stairs. Once he was in the bedroom, she turned back to the table. "You want my bacon, chico?"
Abel miserable shook his head. He wasn't hungry. Not in the least. Fear, a tight fear, had coiled in the pit of his stomach. This wasn't the constant fear he now lived with of doing something wrong or getting in trouble. No, this was the fear of being returned to a worse situation. It was the painful, deep-seated fear he had of his brother.
"That just totally ruined your appetite, ey?" Nire asked sympathetically. She scarfed down her last pancake, standing and throwing out the carton.
Abel wrung his hands under the table. He couldn't eat the rest of his meal. It would make him sick. But nor could he throw it away, for fear of her becoming angry. His dilemma was solved as Nire drank the rest of her juice and tossed that and the McDonald's bag away.
"Kitty kat, if you're not going to eat that, do you want me to put it in the fridge for later or just chuck it?"
He looked up at her, studying her face, trying to determine if she was serious. Just because she said it didn't mean she was truthful.
Nire laughed gently. "It's just cheap fast food. A dime a dozen."
Jander had long since wandered over to the couch, yawning. Now he leaned over the back, watching Nire with puppy dog eyes.
Abel finally got up the nerve and opened his mouth, shakily saying, "Trash it." He pushed back his chair, standing up and folding close the carton.
Nire took it from him and threw it in the garbage. "Argh, I'm *exhausted*. Mr. Floor, you have *never* looked so good."
Abel followed her over to the couch, and stood by the back as she settled on the floor. He rubbed one hand up and down the other arm, nervously licking his lips. He didn't want to be alone upstairs, not tonight. But he couldn't figure out how to ask, if he even could ask. The fear of Kane was worse than the fear of what Nire would do to him for being so presumptuous.
The young girl looked up at him, twitching her head slightly to shake off Jander's hand, which was playing with her hair. "Whassa matter, kitty kat?"
His chin trembled slightly. He wanted warm bodies around him, not to be all alone. All too clearly, he could feel the desolation of the night before. His tongue flicked out to wet his lips again.
"I…" he whimpered quietly. "Will you…"
"Take a breath, kitty kat. What? Are we going upstairs again?"
"Please?" he whispered, begging.
She laughed softly, poking Jander in the stomach. "Get up, doofus. We're moving again."
Abel could have cried in relief as they went up the stairs together. As they neared the relative safety of his room, he began having second thoughts. She may not have tried anything last time, but that didn't mean she wouldn't this time. Nire slid under the covers in the middle, Jander collapsing next to her. Gingerly, Abel crawled under the blankets on the other side. He shivered, even though he still had a fever.
Nire purred quietly in the pitch-black. "C'mere, kitty kat. Neither of us will hurt you."
He inched closer to her, whimpering softly. She drew him in, close against her side, ignoring the way he flinched and cringed from her touch. She didn't say anything, just let the heat from her body seep and mingle with his. After a few minutes, he relaxed slightly, his stiff muscles loosening a little. The steady grumbling of Nire's chest slowly lulled him to sleep.
~~~~{@
When Abel woke up, he was facedown on the bed, completely naked. With rising panic, he tried to move his arms and legs, quickly discovering that they were tied to the four corners of the bed. How had they managed to do this without him knowing? His muscles tensed as he tried to pull himself loose, to get away.
But when he heard the low, nefarious chuckling behind him, his body wilted.
"Did you think you could get away from me that easy?"
Sweaty fingers trailed up his leg, fondling his balls and pinching his ass hard enough to hurt. Abel whimpered quietly, squeezing his eyes shut as if Kane didn't exist if he couldn't be seen. Something bit into his back, the blood immediately beginning to run. He waited for the stirrings of the change - it was too close to the moon for the blood not to cause him to loose control. To his relief, there was nothing.
But the happiness over that was shot-lived as he felt a biting pain in his back. A quiet whimper escaped his mouth as utter hopelessness filled him. Those were only the first of hours of pain that were sure to come.
"Shut up!" Repeated blows of whatever it was, left Abel shaking in pain. He wanted to pass out, he prayed he would pass out, but he didn't. Again and again and again he was hit. Over and over until tears leaked from his eyes. And it was just the beginning. This wouldn't end until his brother got his fill of pleasure.
"I've missed you, my brother," Kane purred in his silky voice. "There's no one around to tend to my needs anymore."
Abel choked back a sob as more violence was wreaked upon him. The bed was soaked in his blood. Soon, sooner than it should have happened, he felt Kane's body hovering over his. The bed creaked, and he could feel hands pressing down the mattress on either side of him, what felt like a white-hot rod of steel rammed into him again and again, harder and faster each time. Just before Kane exploded into him-
-his eyes sprang open in the dark room. He was sweating and trembling, sobbing. Immediately, his brain registered the two bodies in the bed, and he scrambled away from them, cowering in the end corner of the bed. The person who had been spooning him sat up immediately. Abel whimpered fearfully, cringing away from both of them, but not daring to leave the bed.
"What's the matter, kitty kat?" The gentle voice didn't register on his fear-filled mind as one he recognized. When she reached out to him, he cringed and mewled, shivering. It was almost as though the hand's motion was arrested by the pitiful sound; it was drawn back to the body.
"Whoa, easy there, kitty kat." She seemed to understand that he was too afraid to recognize her. "Remember me? Nire? I taught ya some retarded dances yesterday, brought you McDonalds this morning…" Nothing she was saying registered until she started purring.
He whimpered again, shaking harder. He couldn't go back to a life like that. He just couldn't. She would kill him, or he would kill himself, but never again. That kind of pain would kill him. He was sobbing, but he couldn't stop, no matter how frightened he was of her being angry with him.
"C'mere, kitty kat," she said gently. He whimpered quietly, still terrified. "Come on. I'm not going to hurt you, I promise."
She waited patiently, waiting for him to come to a decision. Tears streamed down his face as he cowered at the end of the bed. She hadn't hurt him yet, but she could start any time. And yet, like Natalie, all she offered was comfort.
"Do you want us to go back downstairs?" she asked gently.
He opened his mouth to say yes, then snapped it shut, whimpering. He didn't know what he wanted. He was terrified of being alone, and he was afraid of them staying.
She took that to be a 'yes', saying, "Okay, kitty kat. See you in the morning."
A snap decision was made as she started to nudge Jander out of the bed. "No," Abel whimpered. "Please…" With trembling limbs, he inched over to her, his head down. He cowered by her feet, waiting, more afraid of Kane than of her.
She pulled her knees up under her. "Come on, kitty kat. Come up here."
A strangled sob escaped Abel's lips as he forced himself to crawl up to her. "Sh. Easy there," she whispered soothingly. He cringed away from her hands as she reached out to him. When she touched him, he flinched and whimpered, stiffening as her arms went around him. But as she began to soothingly rub his back, his arms crept around her and locked as he began sobbing anew. Nire rocked back and forth slightly, rubbing his back in circles. The purring was the only sound she made.
Soon, Abel realized that he was going to wake up Nick, so he choked off his sobs. Nire squeezed him tighter for a brief instant, then let him go. He whimpered as she did, but let his hands drop, too. He didn't want her to stop holding him, but at the same time, he was afraid of it. He was starved for comforting touch because of the deeply rooted fear he had of people touching him.
His entire body was still shaking from fear and silent tears streamed down his face. He couldn't stop either thing.
"C'mon, kitty kat," Nire said soothingly. "Come sleep between us."
He met Jander's eyes fearfully. Sleepy, calm gray eyes met his blue ones. The vampire blinked lazily, actually looking like a relaxing cat. Deciding that, if Nire trusted him, then- What was he thinking? Still, he whimpered and stretched out, cringing away from the vampire. Nire held him as though he were a frightened child. She had yet to harm him when she purred, only purring when she was trying to calm him down. Praying she wouldn't change now, he whimpered and clung to her like she was a rock in a storm.
She stroked his short hair until he stopped flinching from her touch. "Kitty kat, you're protected on both sides now, and trust me, whoever comes will have to get past both of us to get to you."
He whimpered fearfully, a sob escaping his mouth. "I don't want to go back to sleep," he whimpered to her, keeping his head down.
"Yeah, I know kitty kat. But I don't have cures for nightmares. Else I'da used 'em long ago." She cuddled him closer to her body. He didn't resist in the least - for the first time in his miserable life, he felt warm and safe. Not unafraid, no, he still feared Nire. But she would keep him safe. And for now, that was all he wanted.
He sniffled and buried his face in her shoulder like a small child. When he felt Jander move up closer behind him, he stiffened in fear. But Nire's soothing purr and meaningless-but-comforting murmurings soon relaxed him. The bodies on either side of him captured his intense body heat and bounced it back, creating a warm little cocoon for him. Despite his best intentions, he felt himself falling asleep again. The violent shivering of his body began to ease off. Within ten minutes, his exhausted, terrified mind drifted off into unconsciousness.
~~~~{@
As Nick and Natalie pulled into the parking lot of the '360', he couldn't stop looking at her. She was absolutely ravishing. A floor-length black dress clung to her in all the right places, yet still managed to leave plenty to the imagination. Her hair was piled on the top of her head, with tasteful tendrils framing her face. She was wearing a pair of dangling earrings he had given her. A brief bit of shame hit him because of the deep forest-green scarf she had to wear to cover the bite marks on her neck. But it was really all just part of her teasing allure. As he handed the valet his keys, accompanied by a warning glare, he kissed the corner of her mouth.
"Milady, our dinner awaits." He offered her is arm, the warmth of her hand quickly seeping into his cold flesh.
When they reached the restaurant, Natalie's eyes immediately flicked around the room, focusing briefly on each table of people. She could do this. And, surprisingly, it was the truth. She couldn't help but sigh in relief, however, when they were led to a table in the corner, by the exit. Nick smiled understandingly at her, pulling out the chair for her and nuzzling her neck before sitting down.
Now that they were settled, her back to the wall and Nick between her and the rest of the people in the fancy restaurant, Natalie could look around. The restaurant itself was elegant and tasteful. But the view outside… oh, the view outside took her breath away.
They were above the city. The tall buildings of Toronto rose above the lit streets, looming like hovering giants. Watchful, hovering giants. Light twinkled from windows, turning off and turning on, making the city look like a wonderful display of blinking Christmas lights. Cars zoomed through the streets, stopping now and again at red lights, providing more of a general glow of light. The navy blue sky housed thousands of twinkling points of light. It was beautiful. The only thing better than this would be flying.
"I take it you like the view?" Nick asked, slightly amused.
"I love it," she breathed, tearing her eyes away from the glass walls and focusing on the menu.
In the end, she ordered Greek salad for an appetizer and roast duck breast for the entrée. Nick wasn't quite sure what to get, knowing he couldn't eat more than a few bites. Finally, he decided on a plain salad and veal, two things he knew she would like. Just in case. When he noticed Natalie's attention once more drawn to the wrap-around windows, he smiled happily. Some day, some day soon, he would have to take her flying. That beautiful smile rarely appeared these days. Hopefully, what he had planned for the end of this night would bring out that earth-shattering sight.
The meal was filled with the meaningless chatter and long silences of two close lovers who don't always need words to speak. They made sure to keep the conversation to light matters, wanting the mood to stay as light and carefree as it had been. Mostly, they traded stories about past Christmases, Nick being especially careful not to get lost in his memories. Natalie noticed that he kept looking at her intently all night. It was as if he was measuring her, judging her. Although his intense staring unnerved her slightly, she did not comment on it. That was just something Nick did sometimes, as if her were committing everything about her to memory in case one day he didn't have it. Whenever she managed to catch his eyes, he would look away quickly, that 'I would be blushing if I could' look suffusing his face. It was almost as bad as before they had acknowledged their love.
*In fact, * she mused, *this is almost the way he was looking at me the night Schanke died… when he was going to leave. Oh, Jesus, please don't let that be it. * He wouldn't actually do that to her, would he? After all, it was different now… When it was time to move on, she thought he was going to bring her. Allow her to come. Or, maybe he had finally gotten tired of her. Janette was back in town - he could have a perfect body again… No. Natalie banished those thoughts from her head. She was *not* going to spend this lovely dinner worrying about *that*. If Nick had taken her out to dinner just so he could tell her he was moving on without her, well, she would deal.
Nick, although responding to her words and sharing his own tales of old, was just as lost in thought as she. And it was just as worrisome. What if this wasn't the right time? What if she said no? Would she really want to be chained to a vampire like that? And could he fairly ask her to give up any possibility of a normal life? Jesus, this was far too complicated. His mind was just running in the circles it had been running in since his conversation with Tracy. But he wanted it so badly…
Once dessert was done and everything paid for, Nick stood and offered Natalie his hand. "Let's go out on the observation deck."
A brilliant smile spread across her face as she stood. It was the middle of December, she was going to freeze to death, but it would be worth it. Of course, Nick, always considerate, gave her the jacket to his tux as soon as they stepped outside. Natalie tightened her grip on his arm as they walked to the edge of the platform. The city revolved around them like a slow, multi-colored carousel.
"It's beautiful," Natalie murmured, looking around.
"Not as beautiful as you." Nick pressed her fingers to his lips as she turned to face him, somehow knowing that something was up.
Nick fumbled for an opening as he drowned in Natalie's soft brown eyes. His tongue flicked out to nervously lick his lips. He could do this. He could get over his fear of rejection and do this. And if she said no, he could deal with it. It wouldn't be the end of the world, just the end of *his* world. She just watched him, waiting. Inside, her spirits were sinking, sure she knew what was to come. He was just trying to figure out a way to let her down easy. Finally, Nick forced himself to begin.
"Nat…" She could hear the nervousness in his voice. "Since the day I met you, I couldn't stop thinking about you, watching you, wishing I was hearing the sound of your voice when we were apart. You never turned away from me, you believed when I didn't. You helped me get through everything, smacked me when I need it, had faith when I didn't. Now, I'm lost when I'm not with you. Even when I tried to push you away, you believed. In me, in us. I…" He had practiced this over and over again, even written it down so he wouldn't forget. It had sounded good then, but now… He gulped and plowed ahead, unable to gauge Natalie's reaction to his words.
"I can't imagine living a day of my life without you by my side. I can't imagine not waking up and seeing your sweet smile. I…" He lost it again, couldn't remember what he had planned to say. Dropping to one knee, he fumbled in his pocket, drawing out a ring box.
"Natalie? Will you marry me?" He opened the box, holding it up to her, waiting and praying. *Please let her say yes. *
Natalie drew Nick's jacket around her more tightly. Well, this was not what she expected. A complete shock. Tears filled her eyes as she stared at the ring. It was an ordinary, diamond engagement ring. No, she could tell that it had been his mother's ring. A perfect ruby was set on a gold band, a sparkling blue sapphire on all for sides of it. Absolutely beautiful. This was all she had ever hoped for from Nick, but never dreamed would come true. Finally, she made her clogged throat work.
"Yes. Oh, God yes."
Nick slid the ring on her finger, kissing her for all he was worth.
