Title: What Not To Do (When a Bird Dumps on You)

Author: Orilon

Rating: PG-13

Pairing: Spike/Xander implied

Spoilers: none

Distribution: If you want it, take it and let me know where.

Disclaimer: Everything from Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Title comes from Iron Maiden's Live After Death live CD, when Bruce Dickinson introduced Rime of the Ancient Mariner saying "the moral of this story is this is what not to do when a bird shits on you." Anything not from Buffy or Iron Maiden comes from my mind.

Summary: Training continues, and an incident puts Jami on Buffy's bad side.

Feedback: Please.

It has been several months since Jami began to teach me how control my projecting and control my more acute senses. At first when I would switch over to falcon form, I was overwhelmed with the bright light and the sound of breathing and blood and felt a pang of sympathy for Spike. If this is what vampire senses are like, I feel sorry for him when he goes to the Bronze.

Learning how to control my wings and body movements in flying is easier with Jami flying next to me and demonstrating than Deadboy yelling vague directions. Learning how to turn in midair was a scary experience for the first few times, and learning how to evade flying objects was not fun.

I haven't seen or smelt Black Widow for awhile, but Spike says it's only a matter of time before she comes back. He thinks she's just laying low so we are put off our guard and will strike when we think she's gone for good. I have a feeling he's probably right.

Evelyn is a little bit better, but I did not appreciate the look on her face when Jami asked her to shoot at us to teach me evasion tactics. I had small cuts all over my body from near misses, and even Jami had a stake scrape the top of her wing, leaving a nasty cut on her wrist and forearm for a few days.

Jami managed to get herself on Buffy's bad side flying last week. We were flying over the cemetery that Buffy was patrolling in the cemetery that Evelyn was hiding in. Jami had Evelyn hide in a cemetery so I could work on being able to sense the living from the dead when we heard Buffy muttering about needing to patrol instead of getting her beauty sleep.

Jami calls it an accident, but I think that she dumped a load of old feathers on Buffy on purpose. Spike said that he feel down laughing watching Buffy remove feathers from her hair and clothes.