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Chapter Fourteen: Of lovesick Jamses and Macaroni

The following day (Saturday) went from bad to worse. Not only was it raining, there was a leak in the boys' dormitory, directly above James's head. He woke up at five thirty, but the constant drip-dripping of the water was gnawing into his brain.

"Now I know why they call it Water Torture," he muttered inaudibly, rolling to the floor with a loud bang. No one woke up, though Remus rolled over, and Sirius murmured something about evil bunny rabbits. James just shook his head and got dressed. Before he left the room he placed Sirius's hand in a pot of warm water, drew an ink mustache on Remus's face, and replaced Peter's pillow with a rock. He sighed contentedly and walked down to the Common Room. Jessie was there doing last minute homework by the fireside, but no one else was awake yet.

"Hey Jessie," he said quietly. She turned abruptly, dropping her quill in surprise.

"Oh, hey James." She picked up her quill and pushed a lock of smoky gray hair behind one ear. She smiled at him, wrinkling up her freckled nose. "I didn't mean to jump, I just wasn't expecting anyone down here. I'm usually the only one up this early…I'm from America and are time zones are warped." James smiled and made a mental note. Duh! That's why she had a wacked accent!

"I was wondering where your accent was from," he said. "When did you move here?"

"Oh, I lived in Atlanta, Georgia before, and Dad got transferred here a month or so ago. I got into Hogwarts on a reference from my old school." James nodded.

"What does your dad do?" he asked. He was beginning to ask random questions, just because he liked the mellifluous sound of her voice.

"Not sure really," she said. "Something with computers I think…" James nodded. They sat in awkward silence for awhile, her scratching away with her quill.

"Damn," she whispered as she broke the point again. "Accio pen!" Suddenly a black ballpoint came rocketing through the air, caught expertly by Jessie. She saw James looking at it and smiled. "Don't know why wizards use quills. Annoying as hell if you ask me." He flashed her a grin and she resumed working on her homework. Soon a bloodcurdling shriek pierced the calm morning air. James and Jessie jumped, snapping to attention.

"What in hell do you think that was?" asked Jessie. James grimaced.

"Well, I think I had something to do with it," he began, but was cut off when a loud voice bellowed his name. "Yeah, that's my cue. I'd better go stop him before he wakes the entire castle."

"I think it's too late for that, James," Jessie whispered pointing over his shoulder. He whirled around to find himself face to face with an extremely pissed off Sirius.

"Erm…Hallo. Have a good sleep?" Unfortunately Sirius was in no mood for jokes, and he grabbed the back of James's robes dragging him up the stairs into the dorm where Peter and Remus were assessing the damage. When James was thrown into the room, they surrounded him and began a shouting match.

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL WAS THAT FOR?"

"DO YOU THINK THAT WAS FUNNY?"
            "I CAN'T FEEL MY 'EAD!"

"YOU'D BETTER PRAY THE HOUSE ELVES CLEAN TODAY, POTTER!"

"YOU'D BETTER PRAY THIS SHIT COMES OFF MY FACE!"

"YOU'D BETTER PRAY I REGAIN SENSATION IN MY NECK!"

James grinned sheepishly. "Well don't all thank me at once."

"AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!" All three boys began bellowing and pounding James with a mix of pillows and the odd hex. Carolina and Lily poked their heads in the door, took one look around, and ran away. Then a sixth year prefect burst into the room and yelled 'IMOBILARIBUS'. A pillow hung motionless in the air. The boys found it extremely hard to move, like the air was condensing around them. James was cowering in a fetal position, the others standing with arms raised in vicious battle. The prefect cast an amused eye around the room.

"Now I wouldn't normally interfere with matters like this, but if you're going to wake up the whole bloody house, I decided I had better step in. So SHUT UP!" She lifted her wand and the spell broke, sending the boys crashing to the ground with all the extra energy they had built up while trying to fend off the spell. The girl somehow managed to keep a straight face, but her eyes were dancing. The boys stood up, groaning and rubbing sore joints. The girl did laugh, however, when she saw Remus's mustache. He blushed, and tried to hide it which only succeeded in making the girl laugh harder.

"Sorry," she giggled. The boys glared at her. "And don't look at me like that! You should be praising me."

"Why?" Sirius rudely countered.

"All right, would you rather have me after you, or the whole of Gryffindor after you?" The boys remained silent. "That's what I thought." She turned briskly, high ponytail flouncing tantalizingly behind her. Peter walked over to the door and slammed it shut.

"Spoil sport," he muttered, massaging his neck gently. Breakfast was a quiet affair. Remus and Peter were in the Hospital Wing, for a scouring charm and pain killer respectively. James was bleary-eyed, often sneaking side-long glances in Jessie's direction, and Sirius was still sore about the whole bed-wetting incident. Lily and Carolina had noticed the boys' bad moods, and had decided to sit elsewhere. Lily went over to the Ravenclaw table to talk to English.

"Hey Lily," English said as she plopped down next to her. "What's up?" She pushed aside a platter of bagels to make room for Lily to prop her elbows up.

"Not much," said Lily. "Just felt like having a chat with someone sane for a bit." English laughed, and was about to reply when Dumbledore stood up.

"Excuse me," he said quietly, catching everyone's attention immediately (excepting some of our favorite Slytherins). "Sorry to disrupt your breakfast, but something is wrong. A certain boy, Oliver Holmes, should be sitting at this table today." He indicated the Hufflepuff table with one graceful sweep of his hand. "But he is not. He has now been missing for three days, and it has just been brought to my attention. If anyone knows anything about the whereabouts of this third year student, please contact myself or any of my colleagues. Thank you." These words sent a tidal wave of noise crashing down over the students. Everyone was exchanging worried glances and speculations of where Oliver could be.

"Well this is new," English said quietly. "Nothing like this has ever happened before. I wonder what he'll do about it." Lily nodded mutely. English could tell that she was upset, and gave her a friendly smile. "Well, I'd better be off. Potions first class and Professor Centia hates me."

"Bye then," Lily said hastily, standing up. They exchanged farewell waves and walked off in separate directions. She caught Carolina's eye and jerked her head toward the entrance hall. Carolina nodded and excused herself from the table. They met in the hall.

"What's up?" she inquired.

"Oh, nothing much," said Lily. "But that thing about the Oliver kid isn't at all good. English said that a student had never gone missing before and-"

"Lily, shut up," instructed Carolina. "He probably just got lost in the Forbidden Forest, or maybe he's just playing a brilliant joke or something."

"Lina, it has to be serious," Lily said beginning to walk down the hall towards Transfiguration. "Otherwise he wouldn't have told the whole school. And the professors looked worried. Well, all except for Centia, but he's just evil, and that's not the point. The point is-"

"That you are overreacting and he'll be fine. Calm down." Lily sighed.

"Whatever," she muttered.

That lesson proved to be quite interesting. McGonagall taught (or tried to teach) them how to transfigure (or rearrange) the air to make it appear as though there was a door or wall there. There is an opposite spell to make walls look like empty space, but she deemed it to complex for such an incompetent class. This was partly because of Peter's terrific job in accidentally vanishing the stool that McGonagall was sitting on, so that their extremely refined teacher ended up on the floor, robes and hat askew. The class had a hidden giggle fit while she tried to pull herself up. But it was mainly because she said that to every class, every year.

"She enjoys it," grumbled Sirius. He was massaging a sore hand where the stingy professor had whapped him with a long stick when he had 'accidentally' knocked her desk over, spilling mountains of paper to the floor. They all had to agree. Then, in Potions, Centia spent the whole time criticizing Lily's Scouring Solution. She was so distracted that her supposedly green potion had turned a putrid purple color. Remus tried to help, but was given a detention when Centia spotted him.

"Bloody bastard," Lily muttered on their way out the door. "Wouldn't be surprised if he had just killed off that Oliver kid for fun."

"Sure he's evil, but he's not evil," consoled Taryn. "Be reasonable."

"Taryn, evil doesn't do him justice. Try malicious student hating pain in the arse." They laughed outright, until-

"I'm glad to hear you think so highly of me, Ms. Evans." Lily choked on a laugh and whirled around to see Professor Centia gliding along behind them. "Since you are so appreciative of my teaching methods, you surely won't mind joining me for a little detention tomorrow afternoon?" It was phrased as a question, but Lily knew a command when she heard one.

"Of course, Professor," she spat out, furious with her self. She could she that Carolina was ready to burst out laughing, and that Taryn was struggling to contain her amusement. Lily glowered at them as Centia swooped away, his pale face wearing the lightest trace of a smile. As soon as he turned the corner-

"You-should-have-seen-your-face!" Carolina choked out around her laughter. "It was priceless!" Even Taryn let loose a refined giggle.

"Silentio!" Lily muttered. Carolina lost her voice, and Taryn stopped laughing. "Well, I'm off to lunch!" Lily said far too cheerfully. She gave them a jaunty wave, and bounced off towards the Great Hall. When she got there she sat down next to Sirius.

"What took you so long?" he asked though a mouthful of corned beef.

"Don't ask," said Lily sullenly. Then she noticed that James wasn't eating. "What's up with him?" she asked Sirius carelessly waving a fork in James's general direction.

"Oh that," Sirius said, swallowing loudly. "Out Jamsie here's got a crush." Lily giggled.

"You serious?" she wondered, not catching her mistake until it was far too late.

"Well, of COURSE I'm Sirius!" He practically shouted this to the whole hall. Everyone went silent for a moment, and then there was a titter of laughter, and talk resumed.

"Shut up Siri. I meant about our drooling boy over there." Sirius nodded.

"Dead serious actually."

"So, who's the poor object of his affection?" Lily wondered.

"Some third year I think. She's the B string seeker. And pretty damn hot if you ask me." Lily looked over to where he was pointing, and saw a pale, slender girl with smoky grey curls gripped in a loose ponytail and an abundance of freckles splashed across her little nose. She was pretty, Lily had to admit, but her and James? It was almost laughable. Almost.

Lily was about to start on her PB&J when two pairs of hands grabbed her from behind. She almost choked on a swig of pumpkin juice as she was whirled around harshly to stare into Carolina red face. She grinned.

"Yes?" she said politely. Carolina stamped her foot and mouthed some rather impolite words at her. "Magnus," Lily whispered. Carolina found herself shouting loud enough that the whole hall could here her.

"Get this bloody spell off me or I'll-" she stopped realizing that everyone was staring at her, and blush sliding slowly into a seat beside Lily. Sirius and Taryn doubled up with laughter, and Lily pressed her lips together firmly to keep her from giggling impudently. Carolina slunk down so low in her seat that only her pink forehead was visible. When the majority of the snorting and chuckling stopped, she lifted herself up, but only high enough that her chin rested on the table.

"Shut it," she said forcefully. When Sirius didn't heed her words (he was shaking with silent laughter) she lobbed some macaroni and cheese into his face. He stopped laughing. Blinking slowly, he wiped the noodles of his face, accentuating his movements while keeping his anger in check. He then, deliberately, reached out across the table and shoved the remains of his 'face paint' onto Carolina's, wiping his hands off in her hair. James snapped out of his reverie and took careful study of the situation, fighting the impulse to laugh. Lily was doing the same, because, as James had noticed, any sound would turn their mad friends' attention on themselves which was not something they wanted at the time.

The two offenders glared daggers at each other, neither blinking. The silence between them turned almost icy, but then the corners of Sirius's mouth twitched. Apparently this set off an enormous chain reaction, making the two of them laugh so hard they each fell off their respective benches. Then, still laughing, they giggled their manic way out of the hall, arms around one another's shoulders.

"Well," commented Lily to no one in particular. "That was odd." James, Remus, and Peter all nodded emphatically, still watching the retreating backs of their loony friends.

In their next class, Defense Against the Dark Arts, another unpleasant thing happened. As soon as Remus walked into the room, he felt his body shake uncontrollably. The silver in the room was affecting him more than usual today. He became acutely aware of each scrap of that poisonous metal. Every earring the girls were wearing caused white hot pain to shoot through his body, the bullets in the guns obscured his vision, and James's wristwatch was making it quite hard to concentrate. He wondered why it was doing this now, and then he remembered.

"Full moon to night," he moaned softly to James and Peter. Sirius and Carolina had not yet arrived, owing, no doubt, to their little mac and cheese spat during lunch. James gave him a worried, understanding look, and Peter smiled at him (trying to be encouraging) but it was the type of smile a prisoner of war gives his executioner-terrified and pleading. Then, Professor Necare bounced in, far too happy, at least, that's what the marauders thought. None of them particularly liked him, mostly because of his prejudice against werewolves.

As the eager young professor began a deadly boring lecture about vampires, James had to fight to keep his attention in the classroom. He lost the fight, and gladly let his mind wander freely after about ten minutes. For some odd reason, no matter what else he thought of, Jessie kept popping back into his mind. James found himself involuntarily (sort of) examining every aspect of her that he could remember- cute freckles, funny wrinkled nose, enticing misty blue eyes, pretty ringlets, and that great accent…he sighed. Audibly.

Sirius shot his friend a warning glance, but James didn't notice. Apparently, Professor Necare had also noticed James's lack of interest in his subject matter as well, for was the was still speaking he slowly worked his way among the desks so that he ended up directly in front of James.

"Does anyone want to tell me where are vampires most vulnerable spots?" Taryn, Lily, and Remus raised their hands, but Necare was still staring coolly at James. "How about you, Mr. Potter?"

James jumped guiltily at the sound of his name, and felt fear wash through his veins like ice at the site of Necare's wide, toothy grin.

"Erm-I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that," he stuttered, hoping to gain some time.

"I was just asking if you would care to tell the class where exactly are a vampires most vulnerable points," repeated the professor. James scanned the room helplessly, trying to see if there was anything useful written on the chalkboard, but Lily caught his eye by waving her arms. Once she had caught his gaze, she pointed to the space behind her knee, and indicated her eye.

Looking back at the teacher James said, "Erm- behind it's knee and it's eye." He crossed his fingers, trying to keep the question out of his voice.

"Very good, Mr. Potter. Very good." Necare slumped his way back to the front of the room and started up where he left off, while surreptitiously scanning the class. He knew that James hadn't actually known the answer, any fool could tell that, but who had helped him. Hhhhmmm…maybe Carolina. She paid attention occasionally. Not Peter, the boy didn't have the brains, or the guts to give a correct answer…Remus? No, he'd been standing right in front of Remus…but there was something about that boy that he didn't like. Something that wasn't quite right about him. Oh well. Shunting these thoughts aside, he put full force into the lecture.

James breathed a heavy sigh, relaxing back in his seat. Suddenly, a ball thwacked him in the head, rebounding off and landing on his desk. Glancing around, he saw Lily snickering. She mouthed the words 'nice reflexes' and turned back to the lesson, the perfect picture of a studious suck up. He stuck out his tongue (better late then never), and unfolded the parchment.

You owe me one, Potter. And, by the way, the next time you start day-dreaming about that Jessie girl, PLEASE, for God's sakes, keep the drool to a minimum.

He grimaced and pocketed the letter. Was it really that obvious?

A/N 'lo all! Did ya miss me? Well, it was worth a try…here we go- Dani- sorry about Peter…I just felt weird so Peter reflected my mood. In hindsight I suppose he was beginning his slow descent into evil psychoticness (I live there…it's nice actually), but I'm not really too sure at the moment. Yes, if you take the time to listen to the lyrics of most songs (Beatles especially) you realize that they don't make sense. 'Making my way down town…walking fast…faces passin…I'm homebound…' do the faces have bodies attached or is she living in 'Face World'? Oh, I read the Broomstick story or whatever. McGonagall? And a broom that made her feel special? I'm going to have nightmares for weeks! Robin C- Okay! Cool! Fowl-Star- Heys! Did you see? YOU WERE IN THE CHAPTER! Did I do okay? If you hate you then it wasn't you and I was just kidding but if you liked you then it's okay. I'm sorry about the Seeker thing! GOD! I just like the position of Seeker and I find it easier to write that way. I didn't do it because Harry is a Seeker. If Harry was a Beater I STILL would have made James a Seeker because I think it fits okay! So if you have to quit reading then FINE! BE THAT WAY! I'm never talking to you again. *sticks out tongue* starborn- notta problem. Hope you didn't die!