Hello again. Thanks for reviewing....here we go again..

Chapter three, eh? (I no own, you now own, we no own together)

"Now what?" asked Gary,

"Maybe Delia of Eldorne knows something," said Daine,

"Who're are you?" asked Myles,

"I'm Daine," said Daine.

"Oh," said Myles.

"To the Dungeons!" yelled George,

"NO!" yelled everyone else, except Buri and Duke Gareth, who were.well *busy*.

"We have no bloody King, the earth is cracking up as we speak, and Thayet has

bloody failed to bloody calm the seething masses," said Alanna, shaking her head in

disgust. Just then, Thayet staggered into the room, her beautiful face scratched and

bloodied,

"They broke through," she gasped, "RUN!"

And, like frightened rabbits overcome with an unexplained and absolute terror of the

unknown, they bolted, each in their own separate direction. As fate would have it,

Harry Potter and Alanna of Olau, Trebond and Pirate's Swoop managed to choose the

same hiding spot (an old broom cupboard in one of the castle's many laundries). The

Young Potter turned frightened green eyes onto the ropable red head who had some

how appeared behind him without being noticed.

"What the hell are *you* doing here?" she whispered, but all the poor boy could do

was cower and make frantic gestures for her to be quiet. This only served to aggravate

her further and caused her to raise her voice,

"You little @#$%%^&*!"

"P-pardon?"

"I *Said*-" but she never finished, as an almighty bang chose that moment to come

into existence above there heads. There were various other small clatters as bits of

stone tumbled to the ground. Down through a hole in the roof (it was a bad day for the

palace and holes) came an angry mob. And not just any angry mob, this one was fully

equipped with pitchforks, burning torches, pikes, rocks and an assortment of kitchen

utensils. It seemed to have left its battering ram somewhere in the room above. The

people, of course, were all screaming and yelling incoherently, so Harry and Alanna

were, for the moment, speechless. Finally the noise subsided enough for one red-

faced, meaty-looking baker to communicate at a primitive level to the occupants of

the now semi-demolished broom cupboard.

"YOUSTUPIDNOBLES, THINK YORESOGOOD, WELL I 'AVE NEWSFOR

YOU! THERES PEOPLE DIEING IN EARTHQUAKES, SUPERNATURAL, MARK

YOU, AND ALLYOUCAN DO IS SITTHERE ANDDRINKAND HIDE-," the large

man's face was, by this time, purple with rage, so his speech reverted back to its

original incomprehensibility. Alanna, after some consideration, drew her sword and

pointed it at the yowling horde. With a feral war-cry, she charged them, and

unsurprisingly, they parted to let her through (you would to if you had seen her face).

Harry Potter was not so lucky. Seeing an easy target, the mob turned their depraved

faces towards him. They advanced, leering and cackling and making rude comments

about Potter's appearance.

"Help! Help!" he cried, "Oh, please, Miss, Sir, Alanna, My lady!" Alanna looked on

in disgust. Obviously it wasn't everything to have faced down Lord Voldemort three

times so far. She didn't take into account that he was a scrawny fourteen- year-old boy

with no wand.

(Elsewhere in the castle)

George: "Get the feelin' we're actin' like cowards?"

Gary: "No!"

Myles: "We are simply taking stock of the situation from a safer vantage point."

George: "Oh, right, so that would mean we have to get our of this garbage disposal

unit when?"

(Yet another Location)

Buri: oh, Sir GARETH!

Sir Gareth (senior): Oh, BURI! Thayet: EWWW!

(In the midst of the mob)

"AHHHHHHHHHH! Help! I'm only a kid! Please don't kill me!" yelled the stricken

Potter boy.

One woman leered at him, "Why not? Yore in with them nobles, ain'tcha?"

Before she could utter another word, Alanna had her head off with one sweep of her

blade,

"Right! Anyone else for a spar?" she bellowed, her eyes glittering with bloodlust.

Several stupid people raised their hands, and while Alanna slaughtered a few more

civilians, Harry Potter edged away unnoticed as only Harry Potter can. Slinking down

the hallway, he bumped into Daine.

(The garbage disposal unit)

George: I don't know about you people, but it's really startin' to smell in here."

Myles: I TOLD YOU we were simply-"

Gary: If you're so BRAVE, why don't YOU go out their, eh?"

George: Fine, I will!" *squeezes out*

Gary: Hey wait! I didn't mean.please don't leave us!"

George: "Sorry! Bye!" *wanders off down hallway*

(somewhere else)

Thayet: I'm traumatized. I can no longer think rationally. I can't take much more of

this. I'm going, I am going." *curls up into a ball and starts to shake*

Buri: "What's her problem?"

Sir Gareth (holding out more liquor): "Notsh shure. Wan shome more? Yoush have

pretty eyeses!"

Buri: "Yes *hic* please *drunken giggle* yore Grace *hic*!"

(in Daine's hallway)

"Hello Harry!" said Daine.

"Who're you?" asked Harry warily.

"I'm Daine!" said Daine.

"Oh." Said Harry.

"D'you think I'm pretty?" asked Daine, fluttering her long eyelashes flirtatiously.

"Er, yeah, sure, um look, I think I'll be going now-"

"Oh, no you won't!" said Daine, with a strange smile. She grabbed his arm and pulled

him into a corner. Harry stared up at her in abject terror. She leaned down. Harry

blanched. Ducking under her arm, he stumbled blindly under her arm and out into the

corridor, his heart thumping. His thin body was racked with nervous spasms, and he

knew he knew he could not cope with much more of this. Oh for the Dursleys! Where

are you now, Aunt Petunia? Where are all the good old taunts about my appearance?

He knew he had seen better days. He scrambled on along the ruined palace halls,

completely lost. Finally he stopped for a breather. A voice came from behind him. He

whirled, stifling a scream.

"Hiya Harry!" gushed Daine, her beautiful face lit with enthusiasm.

"I'm going to kill you, Harry!"

(Alanna's laundry cupboard)

Alanna the Lioness stood admiring her work. She had certainly taken care of *that*

angry mob! Bloody Brilliant work if she didn't say so herself. Unconscious, dead or

mortally wounded civilians were strewn over the wreckage of the caved-in roof. The

Carnage was absolute, and had Alanna been in her normal state of mind, she would

never have created such a bloodbath. But Alanna the Lioness was not in her normal

state of mind, in fact she had been a bit off-colour for days now. After thoroughly

surveying her work, Alanna left the room and headed back to find the others. She was

slightly worried about Gary and Myles.

(The garbage disposal unit)

Myles: "We have to go NOW!"

Gary: "But Myles, what if they're still out their?"

Myles: "Gary, we'll suffocate and die."

Gary: "They'll kill us anyway."

Myles: "Well, I suppose we could wait a *few* more minutes...

(In another place)

Buri: "We really should get back to the others."

Sir Gareth: *sigh* "Yesh, I suppose sho."

Buri: "Maybe we'll just leave you here to rest?"

Sir Gareth: "Good ideash!" *giggle* "I'll just stay heresh." *faints*

Buri: "Very good, Your Grace *giggle* come along Thayet."

Thayet: "GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

(George's hall)

George ambled down a corridor looking for Alanna when she ran straight into him.

"GEORGE!" she yelled happily.

"ALANNA! I haven't seen you, in what, fifteen minutes?"

"You're a bloody-"

"Just a joking," said George amiably. "You deal with that mob?" Alanna calmed

down at the mention of her triumph.

"Yes, I did. You seen Myles or Gary?"

"Yes, actually, they're sitting in a garbage disposal unit, and-"

"PARDON?"

"They're rather, er, afraid, you see-"

"NO!?"

"Er, yes-"

"Are they alright?"

"Well, come to think of it, there's prob'ly not all that much air in there."

"Show me the way!"



Sir Gareth the Younger of Naxen and Sir Myles of Olau were recovered, unconscious,

but otherwise unharmed inside a moderately full garbage disposal unit on a fourth

floor corridor outside the Palace Kitchens belonging to King Jonathan the fourth, ruler

of the kingdom of Tortall. It is necessary to note that the king himself was missing

and presumed dead at this point in time.

Once Gary and Myles had regained consciousness, they, with the help of Alanna and

George, continued the search for their disbanded comrades. They felt quite safe, as

Alanna had managed to kill most of the common folk of the lower city of Corus.

"So now all we have to do now is find Buri, Thayet, Thom, Thom, and your bloody

father, Gary, and we're done!" said Alanna happily.

"We still have to find the wizard, and that weird little girl with badger claw around

her neck," said Gary,

"And that scrawny lad with his knickers showing," put in George,

"Not to mention ordering replacements for all those civilians you killed, Alanna," said

Myles sternly.

"And the small matter of Duke Rodger taking Jonathan," added Gary.

"But those two are probably dead by now, with all their injuries, wouldn't they be?"

asked Alanna, surprised,

"ALANNA!" said Myles, Gary and George in unison.

"Oh, alright! I suppose this means we have to go after them. Damn that stupid

Rodger!" groaned Alanna.

"Not that 'bloody Rodger'? Asked George innocently.

We'll there you are. I haven't written any of this for ages. I think it might be getting

too stupid, or to gruesome, or something. Oh well.