Disclaimer: Sailor Moon aint mine.I really hope you know that without me telling you!^^
Well, I g2g, toodles!!! *waves cheerily despite the depressed-ness of the fic.*
Love the Wind
Dearest Haruka,
I will not take long with this final plea of acquiescence. You love her forever, I guess.
Maybe I can understand that someday, but until someday comes I am stuck with these
thoughts that plague my mind every night as I lie in my bed preparing for sleep. Sleep
which, by the way, is consistent in denying me its presence. My friends have noticed a
change in me, a change that is due to you and your refusals. A change which was
inevitable; a change which couldn't not be avoided even with the intervention of Setsuna
and her foresight. A change which is drawing me every day into a deeper depression
which you do not even acknowledge! It's your fault that I am this way; your fault that I
am listless in my actions. When will you see me as a person and not a thing for you to
guard? Damnit Haruka! I don't need your protection!
I need….your love.
I'm not a little child. Please don't baby me and tell me things will be all right. Don't ever
ask me again, "what about Mamoru?"
Fuck Mamoru.
There is no Mamoru. All I could ever want was sent from Heaven and embodied in you.
You are my angel. Please….don't ignore me. Don't write me off as foolish, I am nothing
of the sort.
My friends say I am lethargic. I'm not. I'm simply thinking and dreaming and planning
ways to make you mine forever. Michiru was never meant for you. You are mine!
Whatever it takes for you to see that I will do. I am the Moon Princess. I have until the
end of eternity and then I have the next one. My Star Seed cannot be destroyed and
neither can my love for you. I want you to own me. I want you to guard me not from
'duty' and 'obligation' and 'honor' but from love.
You say you could never love me. But….what happened that day? I was alone and I
needed help and I found you and….we connected! We did, Ruka-Chan. Listen to me!
This plea is growing tiresome, the same words repeating in an endless cycle that only
grows every time it recurs. I came into your apartment, and we talked, and you held me in
your arms as if you would never let me go! What happened to us? I know you felt it to.
Why do you insist on denying your feelings! Why do you constantly protect Michiru! My
feelings are far more fragile. I need you
Don't leave me…
*Usagi Tsukino
Dearest Usagi….
You are far dearer to me then you have ever known. I have always loved you in the
deepest possible way. It's physically exhausting for me to even be around you. It seems
like these confusing dances we must do to fulfill prophecies and the like will never end.
If I could, then I would turn myself over to you in the time it takes for lightning to strike,
for that is what you've done to me. You've stricken my heart with lightning and I will
never be the same again. That day so long ago was a mistake. You came to me seeking
comfort and I took advantage of you in your time of weakness just to hold you in my
arms. It may not feel so to you, but that's how it was. I am doing nothing useful for you
except keeping you from your rightful path. Mamoru…..Mamoru is the one you are
destined to be with. You and he have a child together, small Lady, and how could I, a
simple senshi, intervene in a persons right to life? You are not yet a grown woman, Usagi
and your heart will still mature. How can you pledge yourself to me when you have yet to
even know any one else? You cannot! I won't allow it!
I forbid it.
Believe me, odango, this is for your own good. You and I cannot be together no matter
how much it would mean to both of us. You have your destiny already…..and I have
mine
My destiny is to love Michiru, and to protect her. I don't know what went wrong here,
but that night so many weeks ago was not for the best. Don't make this harder for me
than it already is. I betrayed Michiru enough already, and for that it feels like I will die.
The penance I pay for my crimes is to love you from a distance.
Good bye, odango…..
Love always,
Haruka
The Senshi of Uranus stood before the fire that glowed in her living room; the living
room she shared with Michiru; the living room in the apartment she shared with Michiru.
"Michiru…." She whispered to herself, as if reminding herself that she loved her green
haired angel and not the youngest senshi.
She threw the letter in her hand into the fire, and watched as the flames consumed the
writing she had poured her heart into.
Dear Usagi,
You know already I do not love you. There is nothing more to say….
The
End
Well, I g2g, toodles!!! *waves cheerily despite the depressed-ness of the fic.*
Love the Wind
Dearest Haruka,
I will not take long with this final plea of acquiescence. You love her forever, I guess.
Maybe I can understand that someday, but until someday comes I am stuck with these
thoughts that plague my mind every night as I lie in my bed preparing for sleep. Sleep
which, by the way, is consistent in denying me its presence. My friends have noticed a
change in me, a change that is due to you and your refusals. A change which was
inevitable; a change which couldn't not be avoided even with the intervention of Setsuna
and her foresight. A change which is drawing me every day into a deeper depression
which you do not even acknowledge! It's your fault that I am this way; your fault that I
am listless in my actions. When will you see me as a person and not a thing for you to
guard? Damnit Haruka! I don't need your protection!
I need….your love.
I'm not a little child. Please don't baby me and tell me things will be all right. Don't ever
ask me again, "what about Mamoru?"
Fuck Mamoru.
There is no Mamoru. All I could ever want was sent from Heaven and embodied in you.
You are my angel. Please….don't ignore me. Don't write me off as foolish, I am nothing
of the sort.
My friends say I am lethargic. I'm not. I'm simply thinking and dreaming and planning
ways to make you mine forever. Michiru was never meant for you. You are mine!
Whatever it takes for you to see that I will do. I am the Moon Princess. I have until the
end of eternity and then I have the next one. My Star Seed cannot be destroyed and
neither can my love for you. I want you to own me. I want you to guard me not from
'duty' and 'obligation' and 'honor' but from love.
You say you could never love me. But….what happened that day? I was alone and I
needed help and I found you and….we connected! We did, Ruka-Chan. Listen to me!
This plea is growing tiresome, the same words repeating in an endless cycle that only
grows every time it recurs. I came into your apartment, and we talked, and you held me in
your arms as if you would never let me go! What happened to us? I know you felt it to.
Why do you insist on denying your feelings! Why do you constantly protect Michiru! My
feelings are far more fragile. I need you
Don't leave me…
*Usagi Tsukino
Dearest Usagi….
You are far dearer to me then you have ever known. I have always loved you in the
deepest possible way. It's physically exhausting for me to even be around you. It seems
like these confusing dances we must do to fulfill prophecies and the like will never end.
If I could, then I would turn myself over to you in the time it takes for lightning to strike,
for that is what you've done to me. You've stricken my heart with lightning and I will
never be the same again. That day so long ago was a mistake. You came to me seeking
comfort and I took advantage of you in your time of weakness just to hold you in my
arms. It may not feel so to you, but that's how it was. I am doing nothing useful for you
except keeping you from your rightful path. Mamoru…..Mamoru is the one you are
destined to be with. You and he have a child together, small Lady, and how could I, a
simple senshi, intervene in a persons right to life? You are not yet a grown woman, Usagi
and your heart will still mature. How can you pledge yourself to me when you have yet to
even know any one else? You cannot! I won't allow it!
I forbid it.
Believe me, odango, this is for your own good. You and I cannot be together no matter
how much it would mean to both of us. You have your destiny already…..and I have
mine
My destiny is to love Michiru, and to protect her. I don't know what went wrong here,
but that night so many weeks ago was not for the best. Don't make this harder for me
than it already is. I betrayed Michiru enough already, and for that it feels like I will die.
The penance I pay for my crimes is to love you from a distance.
Good bye, odango…..
Love always,
Haruka
The Senshi of Uranus stood before the fire that glowed in her living room; the living
room she shared with Michiru; the living room in the apartment she shared with Michiru.
"Michiru…." She whispered to herself, as if reminding herself that she loved her green
haired angel and not the youngest senshi.
She threw the letter in her hand into the fire, and watched as the flames consumed the
writing she had poured her heart into.
Dear Usagi,
You know already I do not love you. There is nothing more to say….
The
End
