Title: Home is Where the Heart Is, 6/6
Author: Chocolatequeen
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I'm broke. Don't sue.
Archiving: Ask first, send a link.
Summary: In the aftermath of the attack on Earth, two of the Enterprise
crew struggle to find where they belong. Parts 1-5 are vignettes focusing
on various characters, and part 6 is the conversation.
Chapter 6: Finding Our Way Home
The time was 20:10. Beta shift had taken over two hours earlier, leading the Enterpirse deeper into the Expanse. Most of Alpha shift had finished their suppers and were retreating to their quarters to relax, but a few still lingered in the mess hall.
"Mint tea, hot," T'Pol told the replicator.
"I would have thought you'd be in your quarters meditating by now," a voice behind her commented.
Only years of control kept her from jumping at the unexpected sound. "Good evening Captain," she replied calmly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," he said with a chuckle.
"What makes you think you did?" she challenged.
"Your shoulders tensed. Don't look so surprised, I have known you for two years now. I'm starting to pick up on these things," he said with a grin.
She looked at him for a second, unable to decided if she appreciated him being able to read her like that. "I see," she finally said, belatedly taking her tea in hand and moving away from the replicator to give Jon room.
"Coffee, black," he requested and picked up the mug before turning back to her. "Don't worry, I'm not going to reveal any of your secrets," he reassured her. "I just find it helpful being able to tell what my senior staff is thinking.
As he spoke, he and T'Pol left the mess, moving in the direction of their quarters, walking in companionable silence. After a few minutes, Jon broke the silence to ask a question that had been on his mind most of the afternoon. "Actually, that reminds me. I was wondering if you could clear something up for me. I was a little confused by something you said earlier," he said, taking a sip of his coffee while he waited for her answer.
"Of course Captain, what was it?" she replied, cupping her hands around the warmth of the teacup.
He hesitated, glancing around the passageway before speaking. "This might take a while," he hedged. "Why don't you join me in my quarters and we can talk?"
Seeing her nod of acquiescence, he passed her door and continued down the corridor until they reached his own. Punching in the entry code, he stepped back so she could enter first, then walked in after her, collaring Porthos just before he could leap on her. "Easy boy," he said soothingly. "I know you're excited to see us, but you can't jump on our guest," he scolded. "Now are you ready for dinner?" For a moment the beagle seemed torn, but apparently even the Vulcan couldn't compare with food. Sniffing her one last time, he bounced over to the dish, his claws clicking against the deck.
Grabbing the dog food bag, Jon glanced over his shoulder at her. "Why don't you have a seat?" he suggested. "This will only take a minute. There you go Porthos," he told the dog as he filled the dish.
For a few minutes, the only sound in the room was the crunch, crunch of the dog eating, but once Jon was seated T'Pol jumped right in. "What was it you wanted to ask me Captain?" she questioned.
He sighed wearily, rubbing his hand across his face. "T'Pol, it's been hard being the captain today. Do you think you could just call me Jonathan? Besides," he added before she could object, a glint of humor in his eyes, "you're a private citizen now."
"That still doesn't answer the question of why I'm here, Jonathan," she reminded him.
"No, it doesn't, but it makes me feel better," he replied with a small smile. He looked at her a moment before continuing. "I wanted to thank you for your attitude on the bridge today. You were a rock."
"You told me months ago that if Enterprise were to go on this mission, you would need my support."
Surprised, he fell silent. "Was that why you stayed?" he asked a minute later.
"In part," she answered.
Noticing the evasiveness that flashed across her face, he pushed for more. "What was the rest of it?"
He could tell from her sigh she didn't want to answer the question, but she did anyway. "Because Enterprise is my home," she said simply. He sensed there was more she wasn't saying, but the shock that rippled through him when she called his ship her home kept him from asking anything more before she could turn the question back to him. "While we're on the subject Jonathan, why didn't you want me to remain aboard?"
Suddenly Jon realized that being in the hot seat was far less pleasant than asking the questions. "What makes you think I didn't want you to stay?" he stalled, his mind racing as he sought an answer she might accept.
Raising an eyebrow, she said, "Because your arguments were illogical."
"What do you mean? It was completely logical to remind you that the High Command wouldn't let you stay," he countered, hoping against hope that might end the discussion, but he was to be disappointed.
Instead T'Pol favored him with a look that she might have given a small child or a very dense adult. "It was completely logical until I told you that it did not apply anymore," she said slowly, as if she was making sure he could understand her. "Yet even then you persisted by mentioning my possible replacements, why?"
Jon knew when he was beaten. Stripped of his defenses, he stood and turned his back to her while preparing himself to be completely honest. "This is going to be a dangerous mission T'Pol," he began in a quiet voice. "There is a good chance not all of us will make it home. I can hope all I want that you will not be numbered in the casualties, but I know there is a chance you will die out here. As vital as you are to the running of this vessel, a part of me would have preferred knowing that you were safe on Vulcan."
She stayed silent for a minute, digesting what he'd just told her and observing him. Two years had taught her a few things about his body language as well. Right now, he was holding himself rigidly with his hands behind his back. She recognized it as a pose he had picked up from her and that he used whenever he was nervous or upset. Since he hadn't sounded upset that left obviously left nervous, but why should he be nervous? Her mind drifted for a moment but snapped back to reality when he moved to face her again, uncertainty evident in his eyes. Making a quick decision, he looked at him and solemnly said, "That was also why I wanted to remain."
"You remained because you knew you might not return home?" he asked, confused. "I'm afraid I don't follow," he said hesitantly.
"No, not because I knew I might not survive, but because I knew the danger you were heading into," she explained, "and I refused to let you face it without me. I could not send you home to keep you safe as you tried to do, but I could come with you in an attempt to keep you safe myself."
He stared at her for a long time, a glimmer of emotion flickering in his eyes, but then shook his head slowly. "No, you're not understanding me. I didn't just want to keep you safe because you're my friend or a good officer. I'm in love with you T'Pol," he confessed, his gaze melting into a caress. "As much as I need you here, not only as my first officer but as my steady rock, the one person I need as much as I need air, I die a little everyday knowing how much danger you'll be in while we're in the Expanse. You didn't have to do this."
"Jonathan!" she interrupted, standing up in front of him. "How many captains do you think I would disobey orders for?" she asked with a glint of humor.
The soft glow in his eyes blazed into a fire and he took a step towards her. "Ten?" he asked teasingly.
"Lower," she told him, moving within arm's distance from him.
"Hm. five?" he guessed, reaching up to stroke her cheek with the backs up his knuckles.
"Not quite," she replied, leaning into his touch.
"Then how many?" he whispered, pulling her into his arms.
"Only you," she breathed just before his lips met hers.
Around them, the Enterprise moved farther into the Expanse, carrying her crew into uncharted skies, but in that quiet cabin millions of kilometers from anything familiar, two lovers had finally found their way home.
Chapter 6: Finding Our Way Home
The time was 20:10. Beta shift had taken over two hours earlier, leading the Enterpirse deeper into the Expanse. Most of Alpha shift had finished their suppers and were retreating to their quarters to relax, but a few still lingered in the mess hall.
"Mint tea, hot," T'Pol told the replicator.
"I would have thought you'd be in your quarters meditating by now," a voice behind her commented.
Only years of control kept her from jumping at the unexpected sound. "Good evening Captain," she replied calmly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," he said with a chuckle.
"What makes you think you did?" she challenged.
"Your shoulders tensed. Don't look so surprised, I have known you for two years now. I'm starting to pick up on these things," he said with a grin.
She looked at him for a second, unable to decided if she appreciated him being able to read her like that. "I see," she finally said, belatedly taking her tea in hand and moving away from the replicator to give Jon room.
"Coffee, black," he requested and picked up the mug before turning back to her. "Don't worry, I'm not going to reveal any of your secrets," he reassured her. "I just find it helpful being able to tell what my senior staff is thinking.
As he spoke, he and T'Pol left the mess, moving in the direction of their quarters, walking in companionable silence. After a few minutes, Jon broke the silence to ask a question that had been on his mind most of the afternoon. "Actually, that reminds me. I was wondering if you could clear something up for me. I was a little confused by something you said earlier," he said, taking a sip of his coffee while he waited for her answer.
"Of course Captain, what was it?" she replied, cupping her hands around the warmth of the teacup.
He hesitated, glancing around the passageway before speaking. "This might take a while," he hedged. "Why don't you join me in my quarters and we can talk?"
Seeing her nod of acquiescence, he passed her door and continued down the corridor until they reached his own. Punching in the entry code, he stepped back so she could enter first, then walked in after her, collaring Porthos just before he could leap on her. "Easy boy," he said soothingly. "I know you're excited to see us, but you can't jump on our guest," he scolded. "Now are you ready for dinner?" For a moment the beagle seemed torn, but apparently even the Vulcan couldn't compare with food. Sniffing her one last time, he bounced over to the dish, his claws clicking against the deck.
Grabbing the dog food bag, Jon glanced over his shoulder at her. "Why don't you have a seat?" he suggested. "This will only take a minute. There you go Porthos," he told the dog as he filled the dish.
For a few minutes, the only sound in the room was the crunch, crunch of the dog eating, but once Jon was seated T'Pol jumped right in. "What was it you wanted to ask me Captain?" she questioned.
He sighed wearily, rubbing his hand across his face. "T'Pol, it's been hard being the captain today. Do you think you could just call me Jonathan? Besides," he added before she could object, a glint of humor in his eyes, "you're a private citizen now."
"That still doesn't answer the question of why I'm here, Jonathan," she reminded him.
"No, it doesn't, but it makes me feel better," he replied with a small smile. He looked at her a moment before continuing. "I wanted to thank you for your attitude on the bridge today. You were a rock."
"You told me months ago that if Enterprise were to go on this mission, you would need my support."
Surprised, he fell silent. "Was that why you stayed?" he asked a minute later.
"In part," she answered.
Noticing the evasiveness that flashed across her face, he pushed for more. "What was the rest of it?"
He could tell from her sigh she didn't want to answer the question, but she did anyway. "Because Enterprise is my home," she said simply. He sensed there was more she wasn't saying, but the shock that rippled through him when she called his ship her home kept him from asking anything more before she could turn the question back to him. "While we're on the subject Jonathan, why didn't you want me to remain aboard?"
Suddenly Jon realized that being in the hot seat was far less pleasant than asking the questions. "What makes you think I didn't want you to stay?" he stalled, his mind racing as he sought an answer she might accept.
Raising an eyebrow, she said, "Because your arguments were illogical."
"What do you mean? It was completely logical to remind you that the High Command wouldn't let you stay," he countered, hoping against hope that might end the discussion, but he was to be disappointed.
Instead T'Pol favored him with a look that she might have given a small child or a very dense adult. "It was completely logical until I told you that it did not apply anymore," she said slowly, as if she was making sure he could understand her. "Yet even then you persisted by mentioning my possible replacements, why?"
Jon knew when he was beaten. Stripped of his defenses, he stood and turned his back to her while preparing himself to be completely honest. "This is going to be a dangerous mission T'Pol," he began in a quiet voice. "There is a good chance not all of us will make it home. I can hope all I want that you will not be numbered in the casualties, but I know there is a chance you will die out here. As vital as you are to the running of this vessel, a part of me would have preferred knowing that you were safe on Vulcan."
She stayed silent for a minute, digesting what he'd just told her and observing him. Two years had taught her a few things about his body language as well. Right now, he was holding himself rigidly with his hands behind his back. She recognized it as a pose he had picked up from her and that he used whenever he was nervous or upset. Since he hadn't sounded upset that left obviously left nervous, but why should he be nervous? Her mind drifted for a moment but snapped back to reality when he moved to face her again, uncertainty evident in his eyes. Making a quick decision, he looked at him and solemnly said, "That was also why I wanted to remain."
"You remained because you knew you might not return home?" he asked, confused. "I'm afraid I don't follow," he said hesitantly.
"No, not because I knew I might not survive, but because I knew the danger you were heading into," she explained, "and I refused to let you face it without me. I could not send you home to keep you safe as you tried to do, but I could come with you in an attempt to keep you safe myself."
He stared at her for a long time, a glimmer of emotion flickering in his eyes, but then shook his head slowly. "No, you're not understanding me. I didn't just want to keep you safe because you're my friend or a good officer. I'm in love with you T'Pol," he confessed, his gaze melting into a caress. "As much as I need you here, not only as my first officer but as my steady rock, the one person I need as much as I need air, I die a little everyday knowing how much danger you'll be in while we're in the Expanse. You didn't have to do this."
"Jonathan!" she interrupted, standing up in front of him. "How many captains do you think I would disobey orders for?" she asked with a glint of humor.
The soft glow in his eyes blazed into a fire and he took a step towards her. "Ten?" he asked teasingly.
"Lower," she told him, moving within arm's distance from him.
"Hm. five?" he guessed, reaching up to stroke her cheek with the backs up his knuckles.
"Not quite," she replied, leaning into his touch.
"Then how many?" he whispered, pulling her into his arms.
"Only you," she breathed just before his lips met hers.
Around them, the Enterprise moved farther into the Expanse, carrying her crew into uncharted skies, but in that quiet cabin millions of kilometers from anything familiar, two lovers had finally found their way home.
