Disclaimer: I do not own
Fushigi Yuugi, nor Houki, Hotohori, or the ideas that this songfic presents. I
do not own Guys and Dolls, or the song 'Adelaide's Lament'. I'm just borrowing
both to create a weird song fic. Thanks for listening.
As you know, Houki was in Hotohori's royal harem, a candidate to be his
empress. However, Watase-sama never did go into detail about what happened in
the harem. This is just my weird perception.
If you've never seen Guys and Dolls, here's a brief summary of the song
'Adelaide's Lament'. Adelaide has been engaged to her fiancee, Nathan Detroit
(a man who runs a ton of crap games in New York City during the 1950s) for 14
years. Adelaide keeps getting sick, and her doctor figures her cold is
psychology (it's that, and the fact that Nathan's lying behind her back that
he's not running his crap game when he is, and the fact Nathan wishes to remain
engaged). One night, Adelaine finds out Nathan is still running the crap game
she thought he ended a while ago, and then kicked Nathan out, and started to
sing the song (it's a musical!).
So, here we go... All lyrics are bolded, and the inner thoughts of Houki are
italized. And, yes, I realized I hadn't changed any lyrics, and it sound
strange for Houki to be talking about a 'train', and Niagara. Please go along
with it. And yes, this does contradict Eikou Den's story of Houki. Oh well.
Well then...
~~~~~~~~~~
"Oh, Houki, how long have you been sick for?" Houki turned to one of
her dearest friends, and stared at her for a moment.
"No idea. I just don't want to think about it."
"Bad idea sweetie." Houki saw Kaida, an old woman caring for the
woman in the harem, come over to Houki and Aiko. "You know how the Emperor
has never come here in the year you all have been here. I'm not sure, but I
have a feeling that soon, he's going to chose a lady to marry."
"You're kidding?!" Houki was overjoyed with the news. She had never
wanted to join the harem, nor did she wish to be picked. She just wanted to go
home, and see her family, who she hadn't seen in a great while, as well as her
oldest friends.
This is so great! If he doesn't pick me, then I can go home, no strings
attached! How I've missed the meadows, the lakes, the streams...
"Houki, why are you smiling?" Houki stopped. Riiiight... I'm
supposed to act as if I want to marry the emperor, not as if I want to go home.
"A-a-a... At the fact that he might chose someone soon!" Nice
cover.
"With a cold like yours? Sweetie, you better start sleeping, as well as
concentrating on getting better!" Aiko's voice was filled with care as she
stared at her sick friend, who was currently trying to hold a sneeze back.
"Not to worry girls, not to worry! I have the cure!" Houki and Aiko
stared at the graying woman, wary of what her cure might be. Every girl in the
harem knew that Kaida's cures for anything would never work, and they tried to
steer clear of her herbal plants that did nothing, or her rosaries that she
swore Suzaku had blessed for a runny nose. All knew she was steadily growing
older, and her sanity, at the same time, had been reduced greatly as the years
went on.
"The... the cure?"
"Yes girls, the cure!" Kaida fished through her skirts, looking for
something, until she found what she was looking for: a book.
"A book?"
"Darling, you've been sick too long for your cold to be anything common!
It must have something to do with something bigger! And this book says it
all!"
"Kaida, where did you get that book?" Houki's eyes grew worried as
the seconds ticked by, wondering where her possible 'cure' came from.
"I got it from a vender in the city! Now, no worries!" Houki and Aida
glanced at each other, and Kaida continued, opening the book, flipping pages
until she found what she wanted. "Ah-ha! Here it is!" Kaida opened
the book fully open, and began to read. "It says here: The average
unmarried female, basically insecure, due to some long frustration may react..."
Oh yeah, like this junk is going to help me...
"Houki, listen! This might help! With psychosomatic symptoms, difficult
to endure, affecting the upper respiratory tract."
Houki and Aika glanced at each other, wondering if the woman herself was ill.
Kaida looked up, and summed up what she just read.
"In other words, just from waiting around for that plain little band of
gold, a person can develop a cold. You can spray her wherever you figure
there's streptococci lurk. You can give her a shot for whatever's she's got,
but it just won't work. If she's tired of getting the fish eye from the hotel
clerk, a person can develop a cold."
"Kaida, are you sure this is going to work?"
"Positive, sweetie! No worries, for I can find any cure for
anything!" Kaida smiled, and placed the book into Houki's hands.
"Now, take this, and hopefully your cold will be gone in a matter of
days!"
"Th- thanks..." Houki took the book, and looked at the page where
Kaida was just reading from.
"Houki... Kaida's scaring me." Aida spoke to her friend, who
currently wasn't listening.
"It says here: The female remaining single, just in the legal sense,
shows a neurotic tendency, see note."
"See note?" The look on Aida's face gave Houki a laugh, resulting in
a coughing fit.
"As in a note at the bottom of the page! Silly Aida..." She then
continued, not caring for the fact that a few other girls from the harem- the
ones who were the most dolled up, wanting to emperor to choose them the most-
had just walked in.
"Oh, Houki!" The sheer fakeness in their voices shone through.
"Are you feeling better? We hear the emperor might be making a trip here,
to see if one of us might want to be his bride. It would be a shame if you got
any more sicker... then we might be chosen!" The two giggled like mad as
Houki pointedly ignored them, continuing with what she had started.
"Chronic organic symptoms, toxic or hyper tense, involving the eye, the
ear, the nose, and throat." The two girls appeared confused, then saw
the book Houki was reading from. Laughing hysterically, they walked away,
talking about how pointless Kaida's cures were.
"Houki... are you sure this could work?" By now, Houki had ignored
all words spoken to her, or around her. After thinking about all the confusing
words she hadn't understood meant, she knew she knew the answer to the unasked
question.
"In other words, just from worrying if the wedding is on or off, a
person can develop a cough." She walked away, entranced by the book
she was reading. Although she highly doubted her cold had anything to do with
the emperor she was supposed to want to marry, the book was informative,
telling her quite a bit.
"Houki... what are you talking about?" The same two who had walked
away laughing at Houki were deadly confused at the girl's full concentration of
the book, and why she had even bother reading something everyone in the harem
knew wouldn't help at all.
Reading again, she continued as she walked around the halls, looking up every
once in a while to see if she had strayed from the halls where the harem girls
were supposed to stay. She hadn't wanted to get into trouble, but just read,
and see if anything this book said made sense with her condition.
"You can feed her all day with the vitamin A and the bromofizz, but the
medicine never gets anywhere near where the trouble is. If she's getting a kind
of name for herself, and the name ain't his, a person can develop a cough."
Whoever said I wanted to marry the emperor?
Just then, she noticed how far she had strolled, and stopped, hiding behind a
pillar. Just as her thoughts strayed to the emperor, he had come walking down
the hall adjoining to the one she was walking down, talking to his ministers.
Guards were around him, taking the time to ensure his safety. Houki felt her
heart beat quickly, but dismissed it, thinking it was only because she could
get into a lot of trouble if she was found. Again, she hid a sneeze that had
came about her so quickly.
When the emperor left, with his group of ministers and guards, she stepped out
of her hiding spot, and spoke almost quietly.
"And further more, just from stalling, and stalling, and stalling the
wedding trip, a person can develop la grippe!" She knew he hadn't
heard her, but she still took the time to say it for, not only her (influenced
by the book), but for the other girls, who desperately wished he would pick
someone. She leaned against the pillar, and sighed, before turning around to go
back to the safety point- one that she had been told to stay within when she
wandered the halls.
"When they get on that train to Niagara, and she can hear church bells
chime. The compartment is air conditioned, and the mood sublime."
Houki stopped, when she heard the emperor's voice speaking of the celestial
warriors Suzaku had blessed. Houki, once again, hid behind a pillar, but
silently spoke to herself again.
"Then they get off at Saratoga for the fourteenth time! A person can
develop la grippe, la grippe! La postnasal drip. With the wheezes, and the
sneezes, and a sinus that's really a pip!" She calmed her anger down,
and quietly ran back to her room, where she hopefully could finish the book
that had changed her outlook on her cold, as well as the emperor.
Halfway to her room, she stopped, and turned. She hurriedly finished what she
had started earlier, but had been interrupted when he walked near her. "From
a lack of community property, and a feeling she's getting too old! A person can
develop a bad, bad cold!" She turned around again, but hadn't seen
anyone. Panicking, she ran away, thinking that the emperor could find her.
However, her plan to get away unnoticed was destroyed when she ran right into
the emperor.
As Houki fell back, her book fell off to the side. She reached out to grab it,
but was shocked to see the two guards with the emperor holding spears to her
throat. She remained still, listening to the death threats one had threatened
her with, but was shocked to hear the emperor speak.
"Enough. Let her go." Houki stared into his eyes, and she saw
familiarity in his eyes. She had never met with him before, although she had a
strange feeling it might have to do with her dear friend Kourin, who was
currently away with the rest of the warriors, working to save Konan. Everyone
did say how Kouran and Houki looked like they were twins…
As the guards left the emperor and Houki alone, she grabbed her book and stood,
hiding the book behind her back. She bowed low to the leader of her country,
but he smiled.
"Please, none of that." She stood, and he smiled. "You... remind
me of an old friend of mine."
"Would that be the Lady Kourin, whom you recognize as the celestial
warrior Nuriko?" The emperor smiled at Houki, who promptly returned the
smile.
"Yes, in fact, it would be. The semblance between you and Nuriko- Lady
Kourin to you- is remarkable." He stared at her momentarily. "Would
you happen to be a member of the harem my ministers set up for me?"
"Yes, I am." Houki relaxed in the gentle aura of her emperor, and
walked around the palace with him, all the while talking about different things
that had managed to pop into their heads.
Meanwhile, as Houki toured the palace, she turned slightly, seeing the two
girls that had thought Houki was crazy when she began to read from the book
Kaida gave her.
"What is Houki doing with the emperor?" The other shook her head, and
the two followed Houki with their eyes, and saw her pause, getting ready to
sneeze. Both knew what that meant, that Kaida's book hadn't worked, and Houki
was still sneezing, but when they saw no sneeze, they stood still.
"I thought Houki was sick! She was just about to sneeze!"
"I agr-" The other had started to agree, when she stopped, and sneeze
briefly. Her eyes flashed at her friend's, but hers were shut, for she too was
also sneezing. When she opened her eyes slowly, they stared at each other for a
moment, eyes saying everything. They got up from their position, and ran
calling out the same name in unison.
"KAIDA!!"
~~~~~~~~~~
Any comments? Anything? Well... even if you have none, could you please review?
Thanks!
