FOUR

They have no idea what's going on," said Leo after orbing back

in. "Nothing like this has ever happened before."

"Something's going on," said Prue. "Phoebe's right. Demons

don't just pop in and ask to be vanquished."

"Let's ask Clarence," said Phoebe. "Let's find out why he wants

to be vanquished."

"Clarence?" questioned Leo.

"Yeah, we've named him Clarence," said Piper.

"Clarence the demon?" questioned Leo again.

"I know," said Piper. "Just doesn't instill fear like a demon

is supposed to do."

"Come on," said Prue. "Let's go have a little talk with

Clarence."

The four walked in the kitchen. The refrigerator door was open

and Clarence was bent over inside it. As they walked into the

kitchen, he straightened up. In one hand was an opened stick of

butter with a bite taken out of it. And there was butter smeared all

over Clarence's mouth.

"I hope you don't mind," said Clarence. "I got hungry. This is

very good."

"Would you like something to wash that down with?" asked Phoebe

sarcastically.

"No thanks," said Clarence, pulling an open bottle of cooking

oil out of the refrigerator. He took a drink from it. "I've found

something already. Do you eat this well all the time? Usually all I

get is slugs."

"You're eating butter," said Piper.

"Is that what it is?" asked Clarence. "It's the best thing I've

ever tasted."

"Clarence," said Prue, "you said you came here to get

vanquished?"

"Yeah," said Clarence. "I figured you three could do it right.

There's nothing like a botched vanquishing. So I figured the Charmed

ones could do it right."

"Why?" asked Piper.

"Why what?" asked Clarence.

"Why did you come here to get vanquished?" asked Piper.

"I just told you," said Clarence, "to make sure it was done

right."

"No," said Phoebe, "why come to get vanquished at all?"

"Oh," said Clarence. "Well, I figure it's going to happen

sooner or later. Why put it off? Just get it over with."

"Again, why?" asked Prue.

"You have any idea what it's like down there?" asked Clarence.

"The backbiting, the subterfuge, the vying for power. I'm just tired

of it. I'm real low level, like I said, so I don't really have any

chance for advancement. And since you three showed up, things have

gotten a lot worse. I figure eventually you'll come after us or I'll

be sent to distract you or something. So, if that's going to happen,

why wait?"

"So you came here to get vanquished because you're tired?" asked

Leo.

"Yeah, that's about the size of it," said Clarence.