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Chapter 13

Buffy and Oz came in to the class, lugging a pile of huge, dusty books. When they put them down, everyone let out a gasp. Oz sat down quickly, still holding his stomach and Buffy's black eye was clearly visible.

She ignored their gasps. "Okay, We are giving you all a project to do for Christmas. Seen as it's only Halloween, you'll all have plenty of time. The topic is: Famous Vampires and Vampire Slayers. You can present your project anyway you want: charts, essays, orally- I don't care. I'll be giving you all topics and you can ask either Professor Osbourne or me for help if you need information. We have met quite a few of them." She grinned evilly. She took out a piece of parchment and a quill.

"Okay, first up, Vampires. Who wants to do Angelus?"

Harry raised his hand.

"Okay, Drusilla?"

Ron raised his hand.

"Dracula?"

Pansy raised her hand.

"William the Bloody?"

Dawn's hand shot up.

Buffy giggled, "I should have known. Um, Darla?"

Seamus raised his hand.

She kept on going until she ran out of Vampires.

"All right, Slayers! Who wants to do me?"

Several hands went up but Buffy gave it to Hermione in the end.

"Kendra?"

Neville raised his hand.

"Faith?"

Oz chuckled. Everyone looked at him. Buffy put her hands on her hips. "What?"

"Nothing." She gave him another look and turned back.

"Okay, Faith."

Malfoy raised his hand.

She kept going until everyone had a Slayer or Vampire to do.

She gave went around the class, handing out the books. She moved Malfoy over to Harry, Ron, Hermione and Dawn and Neville because they were all working on the same topic. She told them to read each others books and if there was a sound from any of them she would personally rearrange their faces.

They all set to work and Buffy and Oz pulled out books to read. Every few minutes, they went around helping them (or, in Oz's case, limping around to help them). Lockhart sat at the back of the classroom, shooting dazzling smiles at everyone who tried looked back at him.

"Hey Harry" Dawn whispered.

"Mmm"

"Can I read that after you? I've always wanted to know about Angelus."

He nodded without looking up.

"If you need any help, I know him." Dawn said. Harry just nodded again, not listening. Dawn looked slightly upset and then turned back to her book. She read a few pages and then let out a loud snort. This time, everyone looked at her. She burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Buffy asked going over to her.

She pointed to the book and started laughing again. "Spike...a poet...bloody awful...." She managed to get out before burying her head in her hands and laughing hysterically. Buffy just shook her head.

Dawn said something but no one could make it out except Oz who started laughing.

Buffy pouted. "What? Oz tell me!"

Oz grinned and whispered in something her ear. She went red and glared at Dawn. "Actually Dawn, I knew he had been a poet."

This set Dawn off again. She finally calmed down and went back to her book. She was obviously fascinated by Spike's life, and found herself immersed in the book.

Hermione was reading Giles' Watcher's Diary and had to stifle a laugh when she read the first page: "The Slayer is willful and insolent...her abuse of the English language is such that I understand only every other sentence."

She showed it to Dawn and Dawn had had the same problem with laughing but Buffy and Oz were getting pretty tired with her giggling and had to warn her to calm down.

Just before the bell was about to ring, Buffy said to the class, "If anyone has any problems or questions or needs any more information, don't be afraid to ask either of us or Dawn, who met or has heard of nearly all of them."

Harry looked at Dawn. "Did you know Angelus?" he asked incredulously. Dawn slammed her book down on the table and stomped out angrily.

"Was it something I said?" he asked blankly.

Everyone in the class groaned.

"Come on" Ron said. "Only Transfiguration left and then we're going to Hogsmeade."

Lockhart waited until everyone was left before saying to Buffy, "My dear, Buffy, could I talk to you in private?"

Buffy shrugged and told Oz she'd be back soon.

She followed Lockhart into her office. He closed the door behind her. "Don't want to be overheard" he told her. She immediately tensed up. He didn't notice.

"Buffy. I know you and Daniel are quite good friends" he began. Buffy nodded her head. "We are. Why?"

"Well it's just, I think your friendship may be clouding your judgement."

Buffy's jaw dropped. "What?"

"Well, it's just... take last night as an example. He was sloppy. He almost got me killed."

Buffy let out a snort, "*You* nearly disembowelled *him*!" she said angrily.

He let out a laugh. "I think you are going blind, my dear. He ran from battle."

"*He* ran?!"

Buffy took a step over to him. "Mr. Lockhart. Dumbledore chose us because we are the best. The *very* best in the whole world. In one year we have done much more then you have *claimed* to do in your whole life. *You* are the sloppy one and *you* will never come on patrol with the two of us again!" she said with as much control as she could.

Lockhart nearly ran out of the room and Buffy followed him. Oz was sitting at the desk, looking pensive. "I'm sloppy?"

"No!" she exclaimed. "You're a brilliant fighter. He's just an asshole."

Oz studied her for a minute before he believed her.

"Anyway" she continued. "He's just after Willow. Which *so* won't happen 'cos he's a total prick and she's like totally in love with you and--"

"Buffy!" Oz interrupted her.

"Yeah?"

"Shut up!"

She pouted and then sighed. "Come on, let's get you back to your room. I'm so glad we don't have a class now. I have to get changed."

She grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the room.

******

Buffy skipped down the street with Willow, all her anger completely disappearing. Xander and Oz had ditched them a while beforehand, after getting sick of endless shopping. They were all going to meet in the Three Broomsticks in a minute and Buffy and Willow were really taking the phrase "shop 'till you drop" to heart.

"So I'm just like 'You're the sloppy one' and then he nearly wet himself and ran out." Buffy was saying. Willow was trying her hardest not to laugh and didn't notice when Lockhart came up behind her.

"Ah, Ladies. How are you?" Buffy looked at him angrily. "We're fine" she said coolly.

Lockhart wasn't listening. He took Willow's hand and kissed it, looking into her eyes. Willow looked like she was going to be sick. She politely yanked her hand from his and stalked off with Buffy, blushing furiously.

He followed them to the Three Broomsticks.

******

"you know what I miss?" Xander said wistfully. "Coke."

Oz raised an eyebrow.

"Not that kind of Coke! The drink. I mean, okay, the Butterbeer is pretty slammin' but what would someone like Buffy or Cordy say. It's, like, a glass of melted butter, right. Which is a glass of fat!"

Oz shook his head and twirled the glass. "Maybe it's magic drink. 'One hundred percent fat free' or something like that."

Xander shrugged. Oz let out a low whistle. "Shit"

"What?" he said worried.

"The girls are here"

"So?"

Xander twisted his neck and silently cursed. Buffy and Willow looked unbelievably angry. Willow was still pretty red and both of them had that fire in their eyes that made anyone who knew them feared.

Willow grabbed Oz into a kiss the second she reached him. Slightly shell- shocked, Oz pulled back. "What's wrong?" he asked knowingly.

Willow twisted her fingers nervously.

"What? Will!"

She looked at Buffy for help. "Lockhart met us on the way up and he kinda kissed Willow on the hand." Buffy said nervously.

Everyone expected Oz to freak out but he looked around the room and didn't say anything.

"Oz? Are you okay? If it helps his lips are all sloppy and icky and I nearly puked." Willow said nervously.

Oz leaned over and whispered into Willow's ear, "He's here and he's watching us."

Willow nodded and told Buffy and Xander this telepathically.

Buffy sat down beside Xander and Willow cuddled up on Oz's lap. They started talking loudly about what a jerk Lockhart was and what a fake he was, well aware that Lockhart and half the students could hear them.

In the shadows, Lockhart seethed. Nobody made fun of Gilderoy Lockhart like that. And especially in public! He was going to get his own back *and* get that fiery pixie Willow as well. He watched her on that boy's lap, fuming.

He sneaked out of the tavern and headed towards the grounds of the castle.