Toy Story
By Jemmiah
*********
"Jemmiah…"
"No! I can't believe you're even suggesting such a thing!"
Jemmiah stood infront of the entrance to her bedroom, arms splayed across the doorway to stop any unwanted visitors from getting past her. It was a futile gesture of course because her current adversary, namely Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn (with whom by the grace of the council she lived) was both taller and far more stubborn minded. Coupled to the fact he was able to use the force and could most likely drag her away from her one-woman protest, no doubt the inevitability of the situation must have had the resolute and daring master quaking with laughter inside.
To his credit he showed nothing of the sort.
"I'm only trying to get you to see reason." The man stopped in his tracks, folding his arms to show her that whilst he wouldn't back down neither was he about to barge in on her private room regardless. "How old are you? Eleven?"
"You know how old I am." Jemmiah sulked, matching his own stern gesture frown for frown. "It was my birthday two days ago!"
"It was a rhetorical question."
"It was a stupid question, more like." Jemmy muttered under her breath, recoiling a few paces back as Qui-Gon's expression hardened noticeably. "I'm sorry, but you're not going to get me to change my mind. I'm not throwing out all my toys! Ennn-Ohhh spells 'no'!"
Deciding to overlook her flippant disrespect for once Qui-Gon returned straight to the jugular of the matter, something Jemmiah was doing her darndest to distract him from. It seemed to him like a reasonable suggestion: why not cut down on the amount of toys and stuffed animals she had cluttering up her bedroom? By nature a tidyish person, Jemmiah's private lair had begun to show signs of a toyland take-over. None of it was particularly her fault because apart from the rather evil looking plasti-duck she'd insisted keeping on her bedside table; all of her personal belongings had been gifts. Soon there would be no room left, and it was up to him to get her to see the truth:
It had to stop.
"Take that look off your face young lady." Qui-Gon's blue eyes bored down onto her, making her squirm uncomfortably. "What is it I have said that you don't agree with?"
"All of it!" Jemmy grumped back at him. "You want me to get rid of all my toys! I can't do that!"
"Why not?"
"Because it's…it's…horrible! They mean a lot to me! They were given to me by lots of different people…and throwing away gifts is a terrible thing to do!" Jemmiah's lower lip pouted comically at him. "I mean, you wouldn't throw away Master Yoda just because he's getting on in years and a bit moth-eared, would you? So how's it any different to my toys?"
"Because," Qui-Gon inchined forward a fraction, "they are taking up lots of space that you could be using for other things. You don't need half of them. All they do is just sit there on the shelves and…" he peered past her shoulder and into the room, "…on the floor, inasmuch as I can make out!"
Jemmiah stood on her tiptoes as if to bar his view.
"Besides which I thought you kept saying," Jinn continued doggedly in an attempt to confuse her with pure logic and rationality, "that you were a big girl? That you were grown up?"
"I am!" Jemmy looked up at him with large, wounded and paradoxically childish eyes.
"And holding onto childish things is a grown up thing to do?" Qui-Gon rejoined. "There are plenty of places who could use them. Places for sick and orphaned children…"
THAT was below the belt, Jemmiah thought miserably. She'd been that sick and orphaned child and he was reminding her of the fact. Now if she refused to donate her belongings she'd look as if she were a selfish, spoiled brat!
Well, spoiled she might well be - but selfish? Never!!!
"They are sure to have lots of stuff." Jemmy argued back. "I bet they get presents all the time!"
"From whom?" Persisted Qui-Gon, not letting her wriggle off the hook.
"People like you who want to take their own kids stuff away and give it to others!" Jemmy snapped at him, squaring her thin shoulders for a fight. "It's not fair! You are only looking at it from your point of view! Just because jedi don't have lots of personal belongings…"
"Clutter, Jemmiah." Qui-Gon answered calmly. "It's called clutter. And a cluttered mind is not an effective one. Now," he continued looking around the room in a quietly calculating way, "some of this has to go. It's as simple as that."
Jemmy looked at him aghast, not entirely sure up to that point of his was entirely serious…but now she could see from the predatorily way his eyes alighted on her precious belongings that he was deadly earnest. It wasn't right! It wasn't her fault; she hadn't asked for half the toys that lined her shelves! But it seemed as if they were all her guardians, watching over her whilst she slept, and ridding herself of them all was a poor reward for the comfort they gave her. Most of all they reminded her of the fact that there were people within the temple who cared enough about her to make such generous gifts in the first place. Explaining that to Qui-Gon however would be impossible: he had gone from her chief supporter to villain in one fell swoop.
It was silly to get upset, especially when she knew he could just walk in there any time armed with a garbage sack and stuff all her belongings in there - and she would have to abide by whatever he decided because it was his place, not to mention his rules that she abided by. Sure enough, Qui-Gon was on the verge of squeezing past her when she attempted to make a last heroic stand.
"You said that you wouldn't ever go into my room without my permission!" Jemmiah fizzed at him, her cheeks heated with wounded indignation. "You promised!"
The master hesitated. He had promised; it had been a vow he'd been happy enough to keep in order to help her feel secure in her surroundings when she had first arrived. She needed her own space in which she could feel safe, and so Qui-Gon always made a point of knocking unless it was an absolute emergency. He couldn't in all honesty admit that the reason for such intrusion merited his retaliation.
"Very well." Qui-Gon folded his arms again, letting her know he was not yet finished even although she had allowed herself to relax in her moment of victory. "I won't go in…for the time being." He let the threat hang in the air, arching a warning eyebrow. "But I want you to sort through all your toys and throw out the ones you don't want to keep."
"But I want to keep all of them!" Jemmiah was genuinely crestfallen, especially when Qui-Gon about-turned and withdrew to the living area, leaving her staring at his retreating back. That was it then: he was adamant in his decision. What chance had she to put her case to him when he wouldn't stay and listen? So it farewell Shorni, goodbye Silas and so long Snordle…
Qui-Gon knew he hadn't really succeeded in putting across his reasons for the massive stuffed toy cull but he'd felt at the time he had to take a firm line with Jemmiah; usually she would work and work on him until she got her own way. And he, being the soft-hearted individual he was where she was concerned, was usually foolish enough to allow it! Not this time though - there had to be a point when enough was enough. There was simply no room for any more toys in the girl's room! If they'd had a bigger spare room, possibly the size of Obi-Wan's own, then that might be acceptable. But there was no possibility of her gathering any more personal belongings. It wasn't a question of being horrible rather than practical. Being a 'parent' he could see this as the truth…but Jemmiah as a child couldn't see her way past her own hurt feelings.
All he wanted was a scaling down of her junk. That was all. Not such a big thing to ask, was it? Then why did he feel like he'd just kicked a cannoid pup?
"Master J?" Jemmy called, protectively holding what looked like a giant stuffed Bantha that Qui-Gon didn't
even know she owned.
"Yes?"
"Did you really mean ALL of them?" She swallowed slightly.
Qui-Gon caught the miserable expression and nearly…very nearly teetered on the edge of giving in and telling her she could have her way yet again. But no - what signal did that give out? That he was always wrong and she was always right? That he was weak? A soft-heart who never, ever carried out his threats?
He pursed his lips, considering.
"No." He replied a touch mischievously, spinning his chair around so he could see into her room once again. "I'm prepared to compromise…"
Jemmiah's face shone eagerly.
"If you're very good between now and supper time I might…possibly…let you keep the duck." He pointed through to where Snordle sat on her bedroom table.
With his words of generosity still hanging in the air, Qui-Gon turned around quickly so as not to let Jemmiah see him smile, feeling the arrows of disgust shooting himself clean in his back…
***********
It wasn't fair!
Even after hours and hours of sifting through her many varied toys, knowing that she was as good as saying goodbye to them in turn, Jemmiah couldn't help but bristle with the indignity of it all. Why was he doing this? Strange to think that she should get so worked up about mere objects. At the end of the day that was all they were, after all. It wasn't like they were real, flesh and blood people…although she'd had to say goodbye to so many of them in her time that she'd lost count. So why, she wondered as she looked at the face of the rather angry looking one-eyed Gundark in her arms, was she having such difficulty with these mere scraps of cloth? It made no sense that she could think of.
Even when Obi-Wan knocked on the half open door to see how she was faring Jemmiah didn't bother looking up. No doubt he was checking up on her, doing Qui-Gon's bidding. Couldn't she get any peace at all? Why was the whole universe out to get her all of a sudden?
"I came to see how you were." Obi-Wan dared to poke his face around the door, never quite sure what reaction he would meet on doing so. "I thought I'd…"
"Check up on me!" Jemmiah inserted with a low growl.
"What? No, no…nothing of the sort." Obi-Wan hurried to reassure her, waving his hands about in his own defence, knowing how quick to anger Jemmiah could get. "I was wondering if you needed any help at all."
Jemmiah sighed, shoulders slumped in defeat. "Ben…I can't do this. It's awful! I don't want to give my stuff away! Why should I? I don't want lots of grubby crèche kids pulling the head off my Nargot! People gave me these things so why should I disrespect them by tossing them away like they mean nothing?"
"I know." Obi-Wan smiled, attempting to placate her and easing himself down onto the floor next to her so as to remain at more or less the same height. "I can see your point of view."
"But?" Jemmiah's voice could have curdled Bantha milk.
"I can see my master's point of view as well. Please don't look at me like that - remember I'm in the middle here! I'm trying to keep the peace and it's not proving terribly easy." He offered her a sympathetic clap of the shoulder, hoping she wouldn't shrug him away. "Jemmiah…you do have an awful lot of stuff. You always keep a tidy room but of late it's got a bit out of hand, hasn't it?"
"It's still not my fault!" Jemmy looked about her as if desperately seeking a solution to her problem. Somehow she HAD to get Obi-Wan on her side! He was her only hope now. "I mean, I've been trying to keep everything tidy; I've even been putting things under my bed…"
"If you need to hide them away where you can't see them, that rather defeats the whole purpose, doesn't it?" Obi-Wan's mouth became slightly crooked, neither condemning nor completely siding with her. "I know, I'm not one to speak. My own room isn't exactly spotless."
"Too right!" Jemmiah glowered back at him, but perhaps with less hostility than before. "It's all covered in your model kits and your unlaundered socks! So why am I getting singled out?"
Obi-Wan shook his head with bemused affection. "You're not."
"Could have fooled me!"
"I don't get lots and lots of toys given to me all the time." Obi-Wan pointed out reasonably. "You seem to average a new one every time one of the masters come back from a mission. And there are 10, 000 jedi in the temple. Now do you see why Qui-Gon is concerned?"
Sadly, Jemmiah could see the reasoning behind Qui-Gon's actions although she didn't really want to admit it. No doubt Qui-Gon was worried about space. It was quite cramped with the three of them, not that she minded…but did Qui-Gon mind? Was that what he was really trying to say? Had she simply become too much of a burden on their home? And if so…what would happen next?
"Your saying it's the toys or me, aren't you?" Jemmy stared abjectly at the floor.
"Pardon?" Blinked the padawan, totally uncertain as to what Jemmiah was trying to get at. "I don't understand…all I'm saying is that there's not much space and we all have to try our best to leave as little clutter as we can. That goes for me too, apparently." Obi-Wan gave a wry smile. "So, why don't I help you tidy up the toys you want to keep and then when can see what we are up against?"
"I don't want to get rid of any of them!" Jemmiah replied obstinately.
"Jemmy…" He sighed. "I'm trying to help."
"Ben, I've had so little up to now to call my own." She shrugged, feeling extremely uncomfortable with admitting any problems she might have as regarded her past. "I don't like that I'm causing a problem. I don't want to live in a mess either but I couldn't begin to choose which toys should stay and which should go. Yeah, I'm too old to play with toys…but they're kind of like lucky talismans for me. Everyone who has given or bought something for me has helped me to feel…well, liked. Special. I don't want that to go away…and I don't want to throw that feeling away either." She stood up, pleading to him with her eyes. "Don't make me get rid of my stuff Ben, please. Can't you help me?"
Obi-Wan blew out a long, deep breath.
"Qui-Gon's being rather stubborn with this one." He said in resigned fashion, not reckoning much to her chances. "I'm surprised: normally you can wrap him round your little finger! Maybe if you…no. It wouldn't work." He dismissed the idea as ludicrous. Jemmiah however had begun to see a chance for salvation in his unexplained plan, her eyes lighting up with hope.
"Oh, Ben! Explain please…I'll do anything!" She begged him. "Please???"
It was a long, long shot, acknowledged Obi-Wan silently. All they could do was hope that an appeal to Qui-Gon's generous spirit and sense of fair play would somehow be enough.
"There is one thing we have in our favour." Obi-Wan added confidentially.
"What's that?"
He winked at her. "We'll cheat."
********
"So you see," Jemmiah explained to Qui-Gon some half an hour later, "I know why you want me to clear away my stuff. I still don't want to throw any of it away - but I'm willing to compromise if you are."
There was something in the gleeful way that Jemmiah rubbed her hands that made Qui-Gon just a touch suspicious…something about the expectant look in her eye that he did not much care for, yet Qui-Gon was nonetheless intrigued. If she'd been thinking through the situation and realised the importance of the lack of space in her room then that in itself was a start. And he wasn't a tyrant: he'd as good as decided to back down on great toy clearance for the time being, but if Jemmiah was prepared to make a sacrifice then he wanted to hear what she had to say. The offer pleased him greatly. An open mind was so much better than a closed one, after all…
"A compromise?" Qui-Gon indicated with a nod that she should continue. "Well, I like to think of myself as fair minded. Let me hear your suggestion."
Jemmiah licked her lips nervously. "If I can put all my toys away neatly so that you can't even notice them in my room, will you let me keep them all?"
"Tangles, that is an unfair solution. You know as well as I do that such a wager is impossible. It is a sad fact that your room is too small to hold your vast collection of stuffed creatures…I wish it weren't so, but…" He made an empty gesture with his splayed fingers. "Alas, there is no other way around the problem other than…"
"Will you or won't you?" Jemmy pouted at him, seeing him shake his head uncertainly. "Awww…Qui-Geeeeeeee!"
"Oh, very well! Anything for some peace and quiet!" The master groaned, "But I'm warning you that I am calling in an independent witness to our bet! Any toys that cannot be fitted neatly on a shelf or packed away in a storage bin will be disposed of. Starting with that hideous Gundark!"
"Independent witness?" Jemmy frowned.
"Master Berlingside to be precise. I'm sure he'll see that there is a modicum of fair play involved." Qui-Gon replied, sweeping his long hair absently behind his head. "And don't think that just because he's Corellian that he'll show any favouritism, because he is also my friend."
"Suits me." Jemmy replied with an alarming amount of indifference. "Give me one hour. I'll be ready."
Qui-Gon gave her the strangest of looks. "An hour? Tangles, there isn't enough time in the galaxy to shift the mess that's accumulated on your floor over the past three months."
But Jemmiah was not to be deterred, stoutly raising her chin in defiance.
"I'll be ready." She grinned, winking across at Obi-Wan.
Why, thought Qui-Gon worriedly, did he have such a bad feeling?
***********
He'd entered the room in trepidation, Dex following curiously in tow, looking around for hidden devices or buckets of water that might suddenly descend upon him by means of a secret tripwire. Usually he felt confident that Jemmiah would never stoop to such low tricks, especially when it would end up backfiring on her spectacularly when he'd confiscate all her toys an have them incinerated…but no. Jemmiah was a good girl at heart. Besides which she liked Dex too much to cause any real mayhem, so it followed that as long as he stuck near to Dex then nothing could possibly befall him…
She was so darned confident though! And Qui-Gon did not like it one little bit, nor the quirky smile he'd witnessed between her and his rather smug looking padawan.
"Looks tidy enough." Dex commented with a small frown, glancing about the place. "Infact it looks pretty near perfect to me…almost as tidy as Kryztan's room. And he's about as obsessive as you can get for tidiness."
Qui-Gon knew something was wrong the moment he walked into the room, yet without knowing what it could possibly be. He hastened forward to the centre of the little room beside Jemmiah's neatly made bed and surveyed the place from floor to ceiling. It was incredibly tidy! Where were all the toys? Where were all the souvenirs and bits and pieces collected by a thousand and one friendly neighbourhood jedi on their way home from missions to exotic planets? It couldn't have vanished!
"Where have you put it all?" Demanded Qui-Gon, his voice strangulating slightly as he doubled over to peer beneath the bed. "Because I know it has to be here somewhere…"
"Master D," Jemmy declared solemnly, watching Qui-Gon staring slack-jawed at the neat shelves with well-spaced toys, "Master J did explain our bet, didn't he? That if I could put away my toys so that nobody could notice them in my room then I'd get to keep them all?"
"He did." Dex agreed, looking curiously at the very strangely behaved Qui-Gon, who was opening and closing all the drawers in the girl's room as if he'd lost something very important.
"And," Jemmy continued, Obi-Wan hovering beside her shoulder, "Can you see anything at all? I mean any mess?"
"Well," Dex scanned the area futilely, "Er…no. I don't see any mess at all!"
"What has she done with it all?" Demanded Qui-Gon, looking up at the well-spaced and regimental line of toys on the top shelf of her wardrobe. "I swear there was at least ten times the amount that is up there!"
Dex offered Jemmiah his hand, shaking it in congratulatory manner.
"I'd say that you've won this particular contest." Berlingside grinned; hoping that Qui-Gon would show his customary magnanimously in defeat. "So, I suppose that means…"
"I get to keep all my toys!" Jemmiah whooped, delighted. "That is just sooooo wonderful! And I didn't even have to try and bribe the judge!"
Dex threw his head back and laughed uproariously, much to Qui-Gon's chagrin. He'd been all over the place from top to bottom - but he had to admit that it looked as if somehow he'd been hoodwinked. There was no mess: there simply didn't appear to be enough junk in the room to cause any! Had he been imagining how much stuff she'd collected? Maybe it had just appeared more, lying in a heap as it had been…
"Very well." Qui-Gon straightened up with a sigh. "I will let you keep all your toys as promised."
He caught sight once again of Obi-Wan's telltale grin and began to get very, very suspicious. Exactly what part he'd played in the affair the master couldn't say: but the force seemed to be hinting that he was in it up to his neck!
"Thank you for your help and impartiality!" Qui-Gon looked accusingly towards his Corellian jedi friend, which Berlingside had the audacity to wave off as if it were an actual compliment!
"My pleasure." Dex bowed, smiling insufferably as he did so.
When Qui-Gon stalked disgustedly past him, the blonde haired master beckoned Jemmiah in closer, trying to get her to confess as to the miracle that appeared to have taken place.
"So, what did you do?" He whispered conspiratorially. "I know you did something: Qui-Gon told me it looked like a landslide! So, where's all the stuff gone, huh? Come on," he added as he crossed his heart with one finger, "I won't tell him, I promise! Word of a Corellian!"
Jemmiah looked at Obi-Wan, who seemed to indicate that it was all right to speak.
"Well," Jemmy chewed her lip for a moment; "It was all Ben's idea. I can't take the credit for it. I wish I was as devious as that!"
"Practise - I'm sure it'll come to you." Obi-Wan answered dryly at the compliment that really could have been construed as an insult had it come from anyone other than Jemmiah.
"You'll notice how careful I was to frame the rules," Jemmiah continued, "and that I said 'so that nobody could notice them in my room'. The reason you can't notice them in my room is because most of 'em AREN'T in my room! But Qui-Gon agreed, and so now my toys get to stay and he can't back out of it because you were the witness!"
"Yes," Dex pondered the matter for a moment, "but…where are they then?"
"They're in my room!" Obi-Wan smirked. "Stuffed into the top of my wardrobe, most of them. Some under the bed…some in my clothing bins. But my master's promised now so it doesn't really matter. As long as nobody opens the wardrobe…"
From next door there came the sound of a sudden avalanche, accompanied by a loud thud.
Pause.
"Jemmiah!" The infuriated and familiar cry came from next door.
Jemmy folded her arms crossly.
"If he thinks I'm cleaning up the mess he's just made," she growled mercilessly, "he can think again!"
