Please see first part for disclaimer.

Anything in italics is thought.

AN. I found this chapter really hard to write, cos I don't know the character of Connor well enough to make sure he stays in character. Sorry about that, but I've always found him to be an annoying brat anyway. Through the course of my story, he will grow up a bit and become less annoying (to me at least).

R & R as always.

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Having connected with Connor's soul before, when she cleansed it for him, Cordelia had little trouble locating him once she left the Hyperion.

She found him walking on a deserted beech, with Justine, the red headed Slayer - wannabe. Dawn was just beginning to break when she got near them. They sounded as if they were saying their goodbyes.

'It's over now Steven.' Cordelia heard Justine say. Hmm, think I'll just wait and see if I can find out anything interesting here, before I make myself know.

'The beast is gone. You'll never have to worry about him again.' She paused, and then added vehemently 'he's getting what he deserves'

Something doesn't feel quite right there Cordelia mused, as she continued to listen.

'I know. He'll have eternity to think of all the wrongs he's done. It just.'

'What Steven? Come on kid. You didn't buy that whole "I love you son" bullshit did you? He knew it was over. Appealing to you, hoping you wouldn't see him for the monster he is was his only hope!'

'Oh that is so much crap!' Cordelia glowed in, in front of them. She had meant to listen for longer, but Justine's comments had really pissed her off. 'Angel could've taken you down any time he wanted to. He loves his son, and would never ever do anything to hurt him, even if that means letting himself be hurt in the process!'

Justine and Connor both stared at her. Finally Connor spoke 'What are you!? You are a demon! I should have killed you before. Your demon nature has taken you over!'

Even as he yelled at her, Cordelia could sense the confusion within him. In the Kurtogh, attack first and ask questions later had defiantly been the rule. Now, when he was shocked by something, his mind reverted to his old ways. Even as he tried to make himself attack her though, he couldn't. Connor's senses were very keen, partly from growing up in the Kurtogh, partly from being the offspring of two vampires. He knew what evil tasted like to his senses. He knew Cordelia wasn't it. He froze, ready to attack, but knowing he mustn't.

Justine had no such reservations. Drawing the knife she kept in a sheath strapped to her forearm, she slashed at Cordelia's face..and gasped in horror as the blade passed straight through her body, not leaving a mark. 'What the hell are you?!'

Looking her up and down, Cordy drawled 'More than you'll ever be.' Then she turned towards Connor, presenting her back to Justine and effectively dismissing her from the conversation.

'No! What are you doing here? What do you want? How can you be with the monster when you're a being of good!?'

'Connor -'

'Don't call me that! My name is Steven. My father gave me the name Steven, after the son the monster stole from him! . My name is Steven.'

'No. Your name is Connor. Your father gave you the name Connor, Angel gave you that name, and he loves you.'

'He's a monster' Connor growled. His emotions spiked, all his grief, anger and confusion piling out of him. Grief and anger over Holtz's death, but confusion because he had started believing in Angel. Part of him couldn't understand how Angel could be the monster his father assured him he was, yet have so many friends. No. Wrong. Mustn't think that. He murdered my father I know he did. I saw the bite mark at his throat, and all the blood. And now he's paying. He's evil. He's getting what he deserves. 'How can you say he loves me. You don't know what he has done.' He moved to turn away, but was stopped by a solid hand on his arm.

'I do know what he's done Connor. I know he loves you, and he's hurting right now because of it. He would never do anything to hurt you. That's why he didn't fight back when you nailed him into that coffin. He would never. could never, do anything to hurt you.'

'Liar! He murdered my father. I saw the bite mark on his throat. Saw the blood.'

Before Cordelia could answer, she felt a blast of emotion from Justine; guilt, grief and satisfaction. Oh. shit. That's how it happened.

'I know how it happened Connor. Oh crap. How do I explain this without destroying him? Screw if. I've never tried tact before. Why start now? 'You saw him, didn't you? After. You found him. You saw the bite on his neck?

'I saw him, my father. Lying there, where the monster dropped him after he tore his throat open, letting his blood spill on the ground!' The anger, the hate, was strong in Connor now I was right. He should suffer for eternity.

'No. Connor, think about it. You say that his throat was torn open, that the bite wasn't clean? But you know that older, experienced vampires don't make a mess when they bite, don't tear the wound. It's a matter of pride.'

'So he was excited, finally able to kill his old enemy, and he went too far!'

'No. Calm down and think about this would ya'. If the demon had gone all out, he would've ripped Holtz throat clean out, he would have drained his blood and painted the walls with it. He didn't though, did he? There was a lot of blood, wasn't there? It didn't look like any of it had actually been drunk, just like his throat had been opened and he'd died from that.'

'What are you saying? That the monster killed my father but wouldn't even take his blood?'

'Geez kid, you're meant to have a clue about these things. Look, I know hating Angel and having Holtz as the fallen hero ties things up in a real neat little box for you, but it doesn't work like that.' She was aware of Justine, hovering just behind her, ready to jump into the conversation should Connor stray from the party line. She ignored her. 'The demon that killed Holtz's family was a thing of evil, no question about it,' her voice softened sympathetically 'and it looks just like your father, but it's not. Your father, your real father, is a good man. He feels bad about what happened to Holtz, but it wasn't his fault. He even understands how Holtz felt, because he lost his own son, you.'

'You're wrong. You're wrong! He's not even a man, and he's tricked you, all of you into believing he wants to help people, but really, he's the same monster he's always been -'

'Okay, Listen up kid. Have you been paying attention at all while you've been here? Angel helps people. I know this. I've known this for the last six years. Even before all this-' she gestured vaguely at the sky '- I knew Angel was good. Now I know how good.' At Connors look of incomprehension, Cordelia realised she hadn't actually explained her change in circumstance. Okay, back story 'You remember my, even if I do say so myself, pretty impressive entrance back there?' Connor nodded, warily. 'Well, basically, the Powers made me into a Higher Being.'

'No way! You're lying. You're part demon and it's taken over!' Justine's mental denial was a whole lot louder than her verbal ones, but so she didn't confuse Connor, who was in shock, Cordelia decided to go with the arguments he had already heard. Also, she was really looking forward to taking Justine down. That whole grunge look was so over in the retro crowd were past it.

'Yeah, you just keep screaming missy, cause you know when you finally stop, I'm still gonna be right, which means you're still wrong.'

'No. It's not true.' Justine was backing away from Cordelia now.

'Yes it is. And that means everything you've based your life on since Julie died has been a lie.' Cordy paused, looking into Justine for a hint as to her true alignment in the pantheon of good and evil. 'I'm sorry your sister died, I really am. And I understand wanting to do something. Hey, been there myself. But you did it way wrong sister. Holtz was a good man, once, but he got corrupted by the demon, by hate. He lost the way and he found revenge. All of this, the whole thing. It wasn't about justice. It was about revenge, on a being who doesn't even exist anymore. He attacked Angel because he couldn't see past his hate to the good man Angel has become. He took Angel's son, only so that Angel could feel the pain he had felt. He twisted the boy he claimed to love, telling Connor he came from evil, and taught him to hate his father, and part of himself.'

She took another step towards Justine, who stepped back again. She was almost at the tide line now. 'But worst of all,' Cordelia's voice was low and hypnotic. She knew Connor had followed her, was listening to what she said with a kind of terrible fascination, 'worst of all, his hate was stronger than the love he claimed for his adopted son. That's why he had you kill him, stab him in the neck with that ice pick. He knew that Connor was wavering, wondering if Angel really was as bad as he said, and he couldn't face the idea of Angel being reunited with his son, in the way he could never be.' Justine stared at her, out of dead, defiant eyes.

'No.' The sound Connor made was desperate, almost a plea. Cordelia could feel his heart shattering at her words. She didn't want to hurt him, but he needed to know the truth. His father, his true father, was still alive, and loved him. If Connor could trust him, the wounds in his heart could be healed. He would have the family he was meant to have.

'He was dieing Connor. The Kurtogh was killing him, just as it was killing you. I never got the chance to heal him. He knew he was dieing. This was his last, best chance to destroy Angel, and he took it. The hate had eaten away the good in him. Revenge was all he could see at the end.'

'He did love you Steven' Justine came back to life. Her belief in Holtz fuelled her fire. 'He did! He wanted to make sure you understood what kind of monster Angel is! Your father's last wish was for you to carry on his fight against evil. To destroy it.' She's wrong. She has to be wrong! Holtz was good, he saved me!! He was extreme, but that's because he knew what had to be done. He lost so much, it's not surprising he was hard. She's wrong. She has to be, or else I am.

'You are.'

'What?' Justine's emotions may have been raging, but she tried to keep her hard arse façade up.

She's like a low rent version of Faith Cordelia mused. 'You don't get it, do you? Or maybe you don't want to. The Powers That Be gave me a promotion. They made me a Higher Being because of all the good I, and the people I work with, have done. That means if you fight against me, you fight against The Powers. You're the one lost in the darkness girl, not me. Holtz may have led the way, but you happily followed him into hell.'

'No' She whispered it this time, holding her hands in front of her to ward off Cordy, and frantically shaking her head. 'No. You're wrong. He was a good man. He understood what had to be done, that sometimes you have to be willing to get dirty, to beat them at their own game. That's why he made me kill him, so the Steven could see, he had to, don't you understand!? He just wanted to make sure he didn't forget what Angelus is.' There were tears running down her face as she tried to deny what Cordelia was telling her, tried to rationalise Holtz behaviour.

'You?' Connors voice shook. 'You killed him? Why? No! It's not true - I-'

'Connor' Cordelia's voice had taken on the deep, melodic tone it had when she soothed Angel. 'I'm sorry. I'm so sorry honey.' She wrapped her arms around his rigid form and held him tight. 'Holtz loved you in his own way, but his need for vengeance over took everything. Justine didn't want to kill him, she loved him, but he gave her an order, and she's a good little soldier.' He's not getting it. All he's feeling is betrayal, how do I tell him that there are people out there who want to love him, so much? Unless.They said I needed to stop thinking like a human.

Keeping her arms around Connor, she concentrated on her memories; of Angel saving people, of when Connor himself was born, Angel's joy in him, and her own. She thought of his grief when he lost him, and the private conversations they had had about how Angel would win him back, and make things right between them. Finally, she showed him what had happened earlier that morning, how she had rescued Angel, and that all he had wanted to do was go out and look for Connor, to make things right between them. She showed him the memories she had pulled out of Justine, of Holtz ordering her to kill him, but not his actual death. Finally, she showed him how she had healed Angel, made him human.

Justine looked on, as the vampires' bitch sidekick embraced Steven. She had to be lying. There was no way Holtz was the bad guy here!! As she continued to watch, she realised that what's her name - Cordelia, had started to glow, and Steven was glowing too! What the hell is she doing to him?! As she tried to move forwards though, to separate the two, it was as if an invisible force held her back, not letting her touch either of them. The glow got brighter and brighter, upstaging the sun that was crawling over the horizon, until Justine was forced to turn away from it. When she finally managed to open her eyes again, she saw that the glow had gone. The two of them were no longer embracing, but Cordelia still had a reassuring hand on Connors arm.

'You killed him.' His voice was curiously devoid of emotion. 'You killed him, because he told you too. Because he wanted me to hate .hate my father that much?'

'Steven no! He loved you, he wanted you to understand -'

'Cordelia is right. I don't understand how she did it, but everything she said is the truth.'

'No! It's a trick! Some kind of evil magick trick! They're the enemy! Can't you see that Steven? Your father wanted us to destroy these people, and we can! You have to come away with me now, and we can!'

'I know that now. He wanted to destroy Angel and all those who stood with him, but they're good people. They're on the right side. Trying to destroy them, makes him, you, all of us, wrong.'

Cordelia could feel the anger in him. Anger at Holtz for taking him away, at Justine for killing the only father he had ever known, and anger at himself for not believing what was in front of his own eyes. Above it all though, he had hope now. Hope was something he had known little of. He had known to kill, to survive, to endure. For the first time, he looked towards the future, the near future at least, with something other than grim tenacity.

He turned his head back to Cordelia, 'I want to see my father now.'

'NO' Justine screamed, advancing on Connor with her knife, still clutched in her hand since she had tried to slash at Cordelia. Can't let him go to Angel. Mustn't let Holtz down. Can't let him go to Angel. Mustn't let Holtz down.She chanted it in her head, like a mantra, as she moved into an offensive stance, ready to attack. Holtz would prefer him to be dead than with Angel. I can do that for him.

'Yeah, cause I'm gonna let you get close enough to him to hurt him.'

'Huh!?' Justine's gaze swung between Connor and Cordelia. 'Who the Hell do you think you are? What right do you have to come down here and mess with peoples' lives!! We were doing fine before you came, now you've screwed it all up.'

'You don't get it, do you? You don't play with lives and souls and demons, and then complain that it isn't fair when it doesn't go your way! What you did to Angel isn't fair but he's still out there, fighting the good fight. You're the bad guy Justine, you got lost in the hate and now you're the bad guy. And if you ever, EVER take a shot at Connor, I will take you straight to hell. Do you understand me? Straight to hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Holtz came from a much harsher time, and had hunted demons for years. You think you're so tough? You wouldn't last a day in the hell dimension I'll find for you if you come after any of mine again.' Cordelia was glowing again. Her voice had changed, taken on a thunderous tone, as she loomed towards Justine.

Justine stumbled back, trying to get away from the words being hurled at her. She knew, on some level she knew that Cordy was right, but she would never, ever admit it, even to herself.

'You killed him. You killed the father who raised me, and between you, you plotted to make me kill the father of my birth. Now you wish to kill me? You want me to have nothing? You would rather see me dead than with a father who loves me? What did I do to deserve this from you?' The pain, confusion, and anger, were all very easy to hear in Connors voice.

'You don't understand,' Justine half sobbed. 'He left me. He abandoned me here for you. He sacrificed everything, so that he could save you from that demon. He wanted me to make sure you hated him too.' Her anger surfaced. 'He abandoned me to be with you, and now you want to go snivelling to his worst enemy! Ungrateful little bastard!' She snarled at Connor. 'But then, he should have expected it. The brat of two blood suckers. He died for you, and you betray him -'

Connor's backhanded strike was so quick, so unexpected, it took even Cordy by surprise 'Gotta tell ya' Didn't see that coming. Not that it's a bad thing.'

Justine stumbled to the side, and then crashed to the wet sand. Connor was on her in seconds, grabbing the wrist of her knife hand, twisting it and applying pressure, so that she was forced to lie on her front with her arm held straight up behind her. If Connor twisted any further, he'd have broken her arm. Instead, he snatched the knife from her grip, and then, changing the angle slightly, dragged her to her feet in front of him. With her back pressed to his front, he held the knife to her throat. 'Traitor. Murderer. He left you here with nothing, and you wanted to make sure I had the same. I should kill you here for what you have done - '

'Connor NO!' Cordelia yelled.

He just stared at her for a second, and then loosened his grip on Justine's throat, ever so slightly 'but I won't. Because living here, with no one, is worse than death. You would have given me that fate! Now I give it to you.' He flung her away from him, so she span and fell to her hands and knees, collapsing into the wet sand at the edge of the surf. She glared at Connor, through her curtain of hair, but then dropped her head forwards so her forehead touched the sand, her whole body locked in a posture of defeat. She flattened and rolled onto her side, eyes staring into nothingness.

Connor gave her one last contemptuous glare, and turned back to Cordelia. 'I want to see my father now.'

Cordelia glanced between Justine, where she lay on the ground, defeated, and Connor. He stood in front of her rigidly, almost daring her to refuse him. She just looked at him, first the outside, then the inside. 'No.'

'What? You refuse? How can you refuse me this!? You are the one who showed me the truth. Now you will not let me see him?! It is not your decision to make. If my father decides he cannot forgive me, then that is up to him, not you!'

'You really are your father's son.' From her tone of voice, Connor could tell that she didn't mean that as a compliment. 'I'm not taking you to see Angel until you've calmed down. You're so used to being angry with him, you don't know how to be anything else. You're grieving for Holtz and now you're swamped with guilt. If I take you to Angel now, there is no way you're going to do anything but fight. You need to calm down, work out how you feel.' When Connor went to interrupt her, she silenced him with look. 'They don't have to make sense. Feelings rarely do. But if you don't understand how you feel, how the hell do you expect someone else to? Let's get outta here.'

By the time Connor had processed what she had said, they were reappearing in the alleyway behind some diner 'Why did you bring me here?'

'You're fifteen aren't you? From what I can remember about fifteen year old boys, eating is way up there on their things we want to do list. So, we'll eat, we'll talk, you'll calm down, then we'll go and see Angel.

Once they were seated opposite each other in an incredibly uncomfortable cream plastic booth, with plastic padding Cordelia was sure was patterned on what was left on pavements on Sunday mornings outside some of the dodgier clubs in L.A, they ordered. Full breakfast platter for Connor, coffee for Cordelia. They sat facing each other but without making eye contact. Connor had become fascinated by the paper napkin his cutlery was wrapped in. Cordelia was watching Connors emotions whizzing about. Trying to cut across that lot and speak to him so he would understand was somewhat a kin to trying to cross an eight lane highway on foot, so she decided to wait for him to start the conversation again.

When his food arrived, Connor attacked it with gusto, as if he hadn't eaten for a week. Cordelia sipped her coffee and waited. Eventually, when Connor had cleared his entire plate, something Cordelia thought privately was a minor miracle given the amount of food he had started off with, Connor raised his head and managed to meet her eyes again. 'What now?' he asked.

'That's up to you. You can eat 'til you explode. You can get on a bus and get out of here.' She grinned at the look of astonishment on Connor's face. 'You can come with me to see Angel, and try and make things work between the two of you. I personally would recommend the third option, but it's up to you Connor. It's your choice. You have all the information, and it's up to you what you do with it. No one will force you to make a decision.' Connor relaxed slightly into his seat, he had thought for a horrible second that he wasn't going o be allowed to see Ang - his father. 'But,' Cordelia continued. Something in her one made Connor tense up again 'I'm not taking you to see my best friend before we get a few things sorted out.'

Connor started at her 'I know I made a big mess of things, I know I hurt him, but you have to give me the chance to apologise for that. You said he loved me. you should forgive the ones you love.right?'

Cordelia could feel his fear and frustration welling up, and the anger that was growing from that. 'No. Just stop. This is what I mean. Angel loves you, and he understands why you did what you did. He isn't angry, he just wants a chance to build a relationship with you.' Connor stared at her, not sure whether he was being told he could see his father again or he couldn't. 'If you go in feeling guilty, Angel will interpret that as his fault, and he'll start apologising for everything, even though it's NOT his fault. It's not a place you two can build a relationship from.'

Connor continued to stare at her 'what do you want me to do then? Should I just leave, or send him letter? Maybe you think flowers and a note would be a good idea!' As his confusion rose, so did his voice, until most of the diner was staring at them.

'No.' She placed a restraining hand on his arm. 'I want to take you to him now, but I need to know that you aren't going to behave like this when you see him. He doesn't think you have anything to feel sorry for. He doesn't blame you for anything. If you can get over it, and forgive yourself, then the two of you have a good shot at getting to know each other, having a proper relationship. I mean it. That's all you have to do. Forgive yourself, and no. I'm not making this all up.'

Connor jolted at her last remark.

'I can read minds, remember. Think about it. As soon as you believe your father isn't angry, that he isn't waiting for an apology from you, and you're open to what he has to say to you, I'll take you to him.'

They sat there, staring at each other. Connor moved to speak impatiently, but Cordy interrupted him 'You can't just hear it, you have to know it. We'll go as soon as you're ready.' They sat in the booth for almost an hour, Connor turning his thoughts over and over in his head, and Cordy watching them spin. Occasionally she gave him a subliminal nudge, just to et him past the odd major hurdle.

Suddenly, Cordy held her hand up. 'Check please.' She grinned at Connor. 'Well done.'

'What did I do? I still don't know if I even understand all the stuff you've told me?'

'Yes, but you're open to possibilities now. Now let's get outside. I don't think transporting from inside a diner, even if it is fairly empty, is a good idea.' Leading Connor outside, and down the alley again, she gave him one last hug. Are you ready?' He nodded, not trusting himself to speak, and Cordy took both his hands in hers and concentrated on the lobby of the Hyperion, where she had left Angel.

As they reappeared in the Hyperion, they saw Angel knocked to the floor by a small, dark haired figure, whilst Gunn and Fred stared on in amazement. The joy coming off the dark haired woman was so strong, combined with the fact that Cordelia had just realised this happy soul was Faith, it didn't even occur to her that Connor might not know she wasn't a threat, until he streaked past her and tackled the dark Slayer off his fathers body.

Watching Faith role to her feet as Connor eased into an attacking stance, Cordelia would have been quite amused that the only thing both of them were thinking at that point was 'Protect Angel' if their intentions hadn't been quite so deadly. Also, neither of them had realised the other was human.

'Both of you STOP now.'

TBC