Chapter 4: Painful Loss

While Tracey was in the bedroom with his mother, Carla tried to get herself acquainted with the rest of his family. She walked up to Ray and offered him a warm smile.

"I'm really sorry to hear about the situation with your wife." Carla said softly.

"Thank you. I'm sorry. I don't think I caught your name earlier."

"It's okay. My name is Carla. I'm Tracey's girlfriend. I came with him because I knew that he would need my support."

"I appreciate it. It's very nice to meet you, Carla. I'm Tracey's father. You can call me Ray. I assume you've already met Evelyn and Bobby."

"Yes. You have a very nice family."

"I think that Tracey has found himself a wonderful girl. My son is very lucky to have you." Ray smiled sadly.

"I'm going to do everything I can to help him get through this. I promise to take very good care of him."

"I know you will."

* * * * *

Tracey sat by his mother's side for a long moment, crying softly over his loss. It still hadn't fully hit him yet that his mother was truly gone. Just then he realized what he had to do.

"I guess I need to go let the others know that Mom's gone." Tracey said to himself as he dried his eyes and stood up.

"I'll miss you, Mom." Tracey whispered quietly as he walked from the room and closed the door behind him.

* * * * *

The others were standing in the living room talking and getting to know Carla a little better when Tracey walked in. It was obvious what had him upset before he even said anything.

"Mom's gone. She died a few minutes ago." Tracey said quietly, trying hard not to break down in tears again.

"Oh no. Momma." Evelyn cried as Ray took her in his arms and held her. Bobby just stood in the corner, crying silently.

Carla approached Tracey and put her arms around him. She knew that he needed her now more than he ever had before.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart." Carla whispered.

"She wanted to see me one more time so she could apologize for something that happened years ago. Her last words were telling me that she loved me." Tracey said solemnly as Carla held him close to her and tried her best to comfort him.

* * * * *

Two hours later the house was quiet. The funeral home had come and taken Aurora's body from the bedroom to prepare her for the funeral the next day. Most everyone was sleeping but Tracey found that sleep was eluding him. Whenever he closed his eyes he kept seeing his mother lying on her deathbed and hearing the last words she had said to him. After a few minutes, Tracey slipped out of bed, being careful not to disturb Carla, and walked out the front door. As he stepped out into the warm night air, Tracey decided to go down to the beach and let the sea air clear his mind.

When Tracey got to the beach he found a log and sat down on it. He breathed deep and tasted the saltiness of the air and then put his head in his hands. The beach used to be one of his mother's favorite places and although it was comforting that he felt her presence so strongly here, he still had a strong feeling of sadness that wouldn't go away. Tracey was beginning to lose himself in his thoughts when a small sound by his right foot drew his attention.

"Growlithe growl. Growlithe?" (You're sad. Why?) The small puppy Pokemon asked.

"I just lost someone very close to me."

"Growlithe. Growl growlithe growlithe growl. Growlithe growlithe growl." (Oh. I know your sadness. I'm an orphan.)

"Oh no. I'm sorry. Do you not have anywhere to live?"

"Growlithe." (No.) Growlithe admitted sadly.

"I have an idea. Since I need a friend and you seem to need a friend, would you like to be my Pokemon? I'll take very good care of you." Tracey asked.

"Growlithe growl growlithe?" (You mean it?)

"Sure. I'm sure you'll get along great with my other three Pokemon. I'd really like you to come and live with me."

"Growlithe! Growl growl growlithe." (Yeah! I belong somewhere.) Growlithe exclaimed as he jumped into Tracey's lap and allowed him to cuddle him.

"Say. Do you have a name, little guy?"

"Growlithe. Growl growlithe." (No. Not yet.)

"Well. I think we need to do something about that. Hey. I've got it. Why don't I call you Buddy? Do you like that name?" Tracey asked.

"Growl." (Yes.) Buddy answered as he licked Tracey's face and for the first time in two days, Tracey smiled.

"Ok. That's your name. I think we should get back up to the house now. That way we can find something for you to eat. Let's go, Buddy." Tracey said to his new Pokemon as he stood up and started back up the beach.

"Growlithe." (Coming.) Buddy said happily as he pranced along at Tracey's side.

* * * * *

When Tracey reached the still quiet house, he slowly turned the knob and the door slid open silently. He walked into the living room, Buddy following quietly behind, and went to get his backpack. He was slightly relieved to find that Carla was still sound asleep in bed where he'd left her. Once he had his backpack he went into the kitchen and sat down at the table, allowing Buddy to hop into his lap.

"Let's see what I have in here that you can eat. You've got to be hungry."

"Growlithe growl." (I am.)

After a few minutes of searching, Tracey located what he was looking for and he pulled out a package of Pokemon food that he kept with him just in case his Pokemon ever got hungry while they were helping him work.

"This looks like what we're after. I know this isn't much but it's all I have on me right now." Tracey whispered as he gently picked Buddy up and sat him on the floor. Then he found a small bowl, poured the Pokemon food into it and placed it in front of his Growlithe. "Here you go."

Tracey watched as his new Pokemon ate the food down in record time. It made him happy to see Buddy so content. Also it occurred to Tracey that this was probably what he needed. Having Buddy to take care of and Carla's love would help him keep his mind off of the loss of his mother. Just then, Buddy finished eating and stood licking Tracey's hand.

"Growl growlithe. Growlithe growl growlithe." (Thank you. That was good.)

"I'm glad you liked it. A friend of mine made that. When we get back to Pallet Town, which is where I live, I can get you some more of that."

Just then a subtle cough caused Tracey to whirl around. He was mildly surprised to see his father standing in the kitchen doorway. He faced his father and gave a small smile.

"Hey, Tracey. You couldn't sleep huh?" Ray asked.

"No. I tried for a long time to get to sleep but eventually I just gave up."

"I understand. Actually I was hoping that you might be awake because I wanted to talk to you."

"Talk to me? About what? What's on your mind, Dad?" Tracey was more than a little confused by this.

"Well. First, I wanted to tell you that I've heard about how successful you've become and I'm very proud of you. The only reason I knew where to find you was that I remembered reading in the paper that you were working with Professor Oak."

"Yeah. I was wondering about how you knew where I was." Tracey admitted.

"Secondly, I wanted to apologize for being so hard on you when you were younger. I was selfish and wanted you to fulfill my dreams and it didn't matter to me your goals or what you wanted out of life. The day you left I knew that I had forced you to do what you did. I've lived with the guilt of that for a long time. I'm just glad that you were able to make a good life for yourself and find a wonderful girl." Ray finished with tears in his eyes.

"I understand, Dad. I wasn't always the easiest person to deal with. No one forced me to leave, either. I did what I felt I had to do to follow my dreams. My road hasn't been an easy one but I've had the help of a great mentor and wonderful friends. I love you, Dad. You shouldn't feel guilty that I took off because it really wasn't your fault."

"I love you too, son." Ray hugged his son and nearly crushed Buddy, who had been sitting on Tracey's lap and let out a quiet yelp.

"Hey. Where did this little guy come from?"

"Oh. This is Buddy. I took him in as my new Pokemon. Earlier when I couldn't sleep I took a walk down to the beach and I found this orphaned Growlithe. I took a liking to him and he took a liking to me so I decided to take him with me and give him a name." Tracey explained.

"He sure is a cute one. You do have a knack for Pokemon it seems." Ray reached over and scratched Buddy behind the ears.

"Well if you've spent five years observing all kinds of Pokemon in their natural habitat, you tend to learn a few things about them."

Just then they heard a shuffling in the other room as Carla woke up and came into the kitchen.

"Good morning." Carla yawned as she moved to sit down beside Tracey.

"Good morning, sweetheart. Did you sleep okay?" Tracey asked.

"Not really. I was worried about you. I heard you get up and go outside. Where did you go?" Carla paused as she noticed the Pokemon sitting in Tracey's lap. "What a cutie."

"Yeah. I couldn't sleep so I took a walk to the beach and found this little Growlithe. His name is Buddy. I took him in and I'm going to take him back to Pallet with us."

"Growlithe." (Hi.) Buddy said as he licked Carla's hand.

"So cute. How are you doing, Tracey? Did you get any sleep at all last night?"

"Not a bit. Don't get me wrong, I tried to get some sleep. But every time I closed my eyes I say my mother's face when she was lying on her deathbed and hearing her voice echoing in my head. I just couldn't sleep." Tracey admitted.

"Tracey, you can't keep this up. If you do you're going to exhaust yourself and end up getting sick. I know that you're hurting and my heart breaks for you but I am not going to stand by and let you do yourself harm in the healing process. I know your dad will agree with me that you making yourself sick in your grief is not what your mom would want."

"She's right, Tracey. Your mother wouldn't want you to make yourself sick. You really do need to try and rest." Ray agreed.

"You're right. I'll try to sleep a little bit later. Right now we need to get ready. It's almost time for Mom's funeral. I'm going to go get ready. Let's go, Buddy." Tracey sighed as he took his leave and went to get dressed, his new Pokemon right beside him.

An hour later they were all ready to go to the funeral home to attend the funeral and give the family and friends a chance to say one last goodbye to Aurora. Before they left, Tracey turned to Buddy and knelt down in front of his Growlithe.

"Buddy, I need you to do me an important favor. Since Pokemon aren't allowed at the funeral home I need you to stay here and guard the house. That way we can at least know that things will be safe while we're gone." Tracey said.

"Growlithe." (Sure.) Buddy confirmed as he licked Tracey's hand.

"Thanks. Okay, let's get over to the funeral home." Tracey sighed, patting Buddy on the head as he stood up.

Then the sad group went to the funeral home to prepare for the hardest thing they would ever have to do.