PART 05: Dune-Look-A-Like planet.






INT. STARLETBALL ONE - BRIDGE

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
How convenient. This speed flattens the wrinkles on my face.

COLONEL STACY :
Yes Quinn, but our boobs getting flattened too.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
What! Eww. Stop at once. I order you. STOOOOOP!

Stacy pulls a brake. The ship stops at once and the unbuckled Quinn flies across the ship right into the front ship computer.

COLONEL STACY :
Quinn, are you all right?

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :(under shock)
Fine. How is my hair?

COLONEL STACY :
The Full Blast gave it extra volume, it looks awesome.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN : (still under shock)
I have got a really high pain tolerance for hair care treatments.

Quinn passes out and falls forward.

(AUTHORS NOTE: Quinn was not harmed in that scene, after all she is a cartoon figure.)

INT. THE SPACETANK - COCKPIT

DARIA STARR :
Take out of hyperactive. And then we set a course for planet Sloania.

J-NINE :
Yo, (The Spacetank starts shaking) ami...mi...mi...ga.

PRINCE TOM :
What the..?

THREE-NT :
We are losing power. No gas. We must have burned it up in hyperactive. Janey, I told you to put always more that five bucks worth in.

PRINCE TOM :
We must prepare for emergency landing on the next planet.

DARIA STARR :
Good idea. J-Nine, give me a reading.

J-NINE : (prays)
Oh Father in heaven. Thou will be Thy name, by kingdom come....

Daria Three-NT and Tom are glaring at her.

J-NINE :
... hey, this is a suitable occasion for that.

PLANET DUNE-LOOK-A-LIKE - EXT. THE SPACETANK - DESERT - EVENING
The Spacetank comes down on the sands of this desert planet.

INT. THE SPACETANK - COCKPIT - EVENING
Our heroes are panicking.

J-NINE :
Left, right, I mean right.

PRINCE TOM :
Pull up, pull up.

THREE-NT :
Whatever...

DARIA STARR :
Dah! A giant dune.

The Spacetank crashes on a sand dune.

INT. STARLETBALL ONE - BRIDGE
Quinn, Stacy, and Ted are watching the radar.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
That is so boring can't we zap on an other channel ?

CORPORAL TED :
Pardon me, ma'am. I have an idea. We could apply the internet to obtain information of the fanfictionstory of Cynicballs.

COLONEL STACY :
Good idea Ted, make it so.

CORPORAL TED :
Yes ma'am.

Ted goes online and starts typing passwords in.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
Stacy, excuse me?

COLONEL STACY :
Yes, Quinn.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
How can there be a fanfiction called Cynicballs, when the story is still been written!

COLONEL STACY :
Yes, but there is a new site called "www.unfinishedfanfiction.net". They put everything on the net, not caring if it has been finished.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN : (disbelieving)
Naaah.

CORPORAL TED :
I have managed to detect it: "Cynicballs Episode XI: Starletballs" by Ace Trax.

COLONEL STACY :
That is super Ted. Put it on the screen.

SCREEN :
Once upon a time...
In a galaxy far, far, too close, there lived a wicked race of humanoids with the name... Starletballs.

COLONEL STACY :
Brilliant. Go to the last page, Ted.

SCREEN :
COLONEL STACY : Brilliant. Go to the last page, Ted.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
Oh, no the story isn't finish yet.

SCREEN :
MISTRESS DARK QUINN : Oh, no the story isn't finish yet.

COLONEL STACY :
Eep, look what happened to the screen.

SCREEN :
COLONEL STACY : Eep, look what happened to the screen.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
Everything ,we say appears on the screen.

SCREEN :
MISTRESS DARK QUINN : Everything ,we say appears on the screen.

CORPORAL TED :
We are looking at now. Everything that happens now, is happening now.

SCREEN :
CORPORAL TED : We are looking at now. Everything that happens now, is happening now.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
Eww, that is so creepy, stop it.

Corporal Ted scrolls some pages up.

SCREEN :
PLANET DUNE-LOOK-A-LIKE - EXT. THE SPACETANK - DESERT - EVENING
The Spacetank comes down on the sands of this desert planet.

CORPORAL TED :
Quinn, Stacy look.

COLONEL STACY :
Well done Ted, set course to the Dune-Look-A-Like planet.

CORPORAL TED :
At your orders, ma'am.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
Hmm. I am curious. How many Daria fanfics are on the net?

CORPORAL TED :
There are 18'565.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
And Quinn fanfics?

CORPORAL TED :
Ehem..... One.

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
EWW! And what is that for a story?

CORPORAL TED :
It is called: "To Get Her Together"
(reads from the screen)
When Quinn and Stacy become aware of their feeling to each other, they have to face the hostility and the bigotry of their environment, after they have confess their love to each other in front of their families...

MISTRESS DARK QUINN :
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!
THESE FILTHY SICK INTERNET PERVERTS!!!!! EWWW! I need a shower.

Quinn runs out the door.

COLONEL STACY :
EEP! Yes Quinn, I need a shower too.
(Stacy follow Quinn out the door, she stops turn around and says to the crew)
In my room on the other side of the ship of course.

As soon both are gone. The Three J's eagerly place themselves in front of the monitor. The rest of the crew lock into the internet, except Ted. He sits aside, looking very puzzled.

CORPORAL TED :
I don't understand this, how can somebody write a story about Quinn and Stacy falling in love with each other? They are both GIRLS!!!