Disclaimer/author's note- I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. This is after the Bandit-Keith-being-controlled-by-that-creepy-guy arc. After the burning-building-thank-god-Joey-saves-the-day bit. Please review. Even flames. It feeds my soul. And if you look very carefully, you might be able to find slight slashy implications. Thank you and have a good flight.

Tonight, I cry.
It's late now - late enough for Yugi to be fast asleep. I always sit with him until he falls asleep, looking so innocent and pure. Sometimes, I let myself be soothed by his quiet breathing, allow myself to float away and just be. Those are good nights.
More often now, when Yugi falls asleep and I can no longer convince myself that I have to be brave and strong for his sake, the fear creeps in and destroys every defense I have. I go back to my puzzle and sit in the dark and softly weep. I am always careful that Yugi doesn't hear me, though I think he may be starting to suspect that all is not well with me.
I've caught him staring at me, with a slightly concerned look several times now. The dark circles that appear under my eyes, the times when I find myself startled when Yugi touches me, only to look around and realize that full minutes have passed without my awareness, the way I hardly eat anymore.Yugi notices all this and more. He asks me what's wrong and I grin ruefully and say that I didn't sleep well. He nods, trusting me to be telling the truth.
I think his trusting nature is one reason I like him so much. Yugi is the first person I've really cared about in longer than I want to think about. He's also the chosen one, on whom the fate of the world rests. It is a dangerous thing to be. Yugi, though he is clever, brave and determined, still isn't ready to face this challenge alone. He still needs me. I am, of course, worried that sometime he may need me and I won't be there. That, however, is unlikely, the way he keeps the puzzle with him now. What scares me so much more and causes me to spend nights crying in the dark is these feelings that I have. This feeling I get when I realize how powerful I am. This voice, deep inside, that whispers to me how, if I really wanted, I could bend the world to my will. This horrible, bestial lust for more power, more dominance, the lust to be master of all I see. How sometimes I want Yugi, the chosen one, to answer to me and me alone.
Common sense reasserts itself, and I know that this is what we're fighting against, and I am frightened. Because it was horrible, yes, but fascinating while it lasted. And these "episodes" come more and more frequently as I learn more about my past. It's like a dark half of me that I had forgotten. I wonder, deep down, if maybe one day, that side of me will take over. If I will become everything that Yugi is chosen to protect the world from. I worry that perhaps, one day, not only will Yugi have to face his fate alone, I will find myself as the one he stands against.
I know he's not prepared for that. I asked him once what would happen if we were ever to be separated. He smiled and said that I shouldn't worry because he wouldn't ever take the puzzle from around his neck if there were the slightest chance of anything happening to it. I smiled too, and let it go at that, because I could see through his smile to the subtle traces of worry.
I can't tell him about my feelings because he's not ready to be on his own. He still needs me to be brave and strong for him. So, I will be. Tomorrow, I'll pretend nothing's wrong. I'll be courageous and witty and help him if he should need me to. I'll be there for him, because I can't let Yugi down. I'll stand up with him, be his shoulder to lean on, his best friend and confidante, and he will not know me any other way, but tonight, I cry.