Chapter 9
Send in the Klowns

Knutz the Enema walked through Square Station, holding his newfound prize of three Master Nut shards which he just happened to find in city hall. Knutz looked up at the sky and saw that it was nearly night.

[Knutz: Nearly night, huh?... Hehehe, great! That casino should be open now! Hehehehe....

With that, the old codger ran off towards Rots-o-Ruck. But, of course, by the time Knutz reached the casino, it had been sealed shut and the only way of entering would be to slam into a giant yellow button above the doors! Let's just skip along, shall we? As Knutz entered, he started to pick up a faint signal from the Master Nut.

[Knutz: Aw, man, why did the Master Nut shards have to go here!? I just wanted to do a little bit a sinnin' is all! Not look for more shards! Oh well I guess I gots to... But first! TO THE SINNIN'!!!

With that, Knutz proceded to gamble and ogle at floozies undressing themselves for filthy bums' Enjoyment! After his feeble old eyes had pretty much had all they could stand of watching strippers all night, and he had lost all his money, Knutz decided to find the scattered "nut" pieces. I mean why not? He HAD to! Not to mention that chrystal signal can get REALLY annoying! (BEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEBEBEBEBEEEEP!)

After about an hour of searching through tedius mazes and that incredibly annoying ringing, Knutz found the three hidden Master Nut pieces in Rots-o-Ruck. As soon as he stepped one foot outside of Rots-o-Ruck, Knutz was transported to the magical dreamworld that G7AY was taken to in Chapter 8.

[Knutz: AAAHHH!!! Is this a beautiful dream or a horrible nightmare!?!

As Knutz transported into a large Aztec city, he looked around, confused.

[Knutz: Oh boy, I must be high again, better lay off that "special" Pepsi Blue from now on...

As Knutz stumbled into the outskirts of the city, he saw Emo and a large royal-looking Enema arguing about something or other.

[Emo: No, father! I won't let you do this! Stop it!

[Enema King: You don't understand, Emo! We must do this!

[Emo: And why is that!?!

[Enema King: We need those Chaos Chrystals for the good of the people!

[Emo: And, of course, logically, the best way to get them is by killing and starting wars?

[Enema King: Alright, little lady! That goes on your perminant sass record!

All of a sudden, Knutz was transported back to Pittsburgh.

[Knutz: What the hell was that!?! It was like someone was trying to tell me something! ...either that or I was right the first time and I'm just high again!

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End of Chapter 9. I can't think of anything funny to say here.