Chapter 13- Dreaming
Last night I had the weirdest dream. I was thinking about it all day in class, though I couldn't remember it all that clearly. Mostly, though, it was about Lily. Me and Lily actually. What I had been thinking about what how realistic it seemed and how much I wouldn't mind if those things really did happen.
First, on my dream I was sitting by the lake looking for something. Well, I wasn't really looking, I knew where it was, in the knot of a tree, but I had to get it out. It was pretty hard though, because something was holding me back, and I only had one arm. Then I saw my other arm but it was holding someone's hand, someone who turned out to be Lily. She was the one holding me back, but it wasn't because she didn't want to be there, she wanted to do something else. Then I grabbed the thing out of the tree, and it was a green velvet box. Then I got down on one knee and proposed to Lily, because inside the box was an engagement ring. Lily Evans. I was dreaming of proposing to Lily Evans at 16 years old. Well I wasn't 16 in the dream but that doesn't really matter. Then she said yes and we were kissing and then I dreamed about 15 different times when we were kissing. That wasn't exactly a bad part of the dream; that was actually the best part of the dream, but it was the haziest. After that I dreamed we got married. It was the best wedding I've ever been to, well except it was in a dream. There was just something about it though, it was like the whole time I had a huge smile on my face and I knew I probably wouldn't ever be happier. Then I dreamed I was pushing Lily on a swing and she looked amazing. It wasn't a drop dead sexy type of thing, but she looked so pretty and classic I just wanted to be with her. Then I dreamed Lily said "James isn't it wonderful? We're going to have a baby!" Then she actually was holding a baby in her arms in a hospital bed. I picked him up, he was a cute kid; he looked just like me except he had Lily's eyes. I said "Hullo, Harry. I'm your father. I'll always be here for you." Sirius took my kid then and said a whole bunch of things about being the cool god father he could always go to when Lily and I were angry. I took him back from Sirius, and Harry and I were just staring each other in the eyes. After that I woke up.
This was one of the weirdest things that have ever happened to me, and there are a lot of things up against that. Who dreams about getting married and talking to his newborn son at 16 years old? I actually also, deep down, wished those things could still happen, which freaked me out even more. They seemed real, like I was seeing the future. It scared me even more that sometimes I think I may be able to see the future. Ever since I was little I knew what I was getting for my birthday even though my parents liked to make it a surprise and kept it a big secret. I've also never been hit by a bludger in my entire life because I always seem to know where it's going just before the beater hits it. But, I mean, that dream I had couldn't have been the future, right? Even if I wanted it to happen, ok well I kind of did want it to happen, but even if Lily liked me it probably wouldn't happen. The thought that either of us would ever admit it to eachother, let alone have a decent conversation again is completely absurd. It took me the whole day to figure this out, and I was thinking about it pretty much the whole time. My father will be pretty pissed off if I don't make Head Boy next year because I was thinking about a dream of marriage instead of paying attention. Practically every Potter since the first Potter at Hogwarts has been Head Boy, and if I don't make it I'll probably be disowned.
