The next day Jordan acted like nothing had happened. Woody was very upset
by this so he acted short with her all day. She figured he was just busy
hanging out with his brother and dad, doing wedding stuff so she gave him
space. She hung out with his mom and Ellie, being semi-girly and talking
about wedding stuff.
"So what kind of wedding are you wand Woody going to have?" his mom asked hopefully.
"Um Woody and I aren't even together, what makes you ask that?"
"My son talks about you all the time and when he does I can hear the smile in his voice, he loves you something awful. I think you love him too, you just haven't realized it yet"
She blushed embarrassed, wondering if this was true.
"Mrs. Hoyt, Woody is great, he really is and I would be lucky to have him but he deserves so much better than I could ever be," she said honestly.
Just then the boys returned home. "I know that's not true" his mom told Jordan, finishing their conversation. No one bothered to inquire what they were talking about.
Jordan noticed that Woody still wasn't paying much attention to her. Later, after everyone had gone to bed he went outside to sit on the porch. Jordan's window faced that direction so when she saw him sitting alone she decided to join him.
"Hey" she said sitting down beside him.
"Hey"
"What are you thinking about?" she asked
"You really want to know?" he asked, turning to her. She nodded that she did.
He leaned over to her and kissed her gently.
"That's what I was thinking about Jordan, that's all I can think about"
She watched him curiously. "So what exactly is the problem with that?"
"The problem is I don't understand how you can just kiss me like that and have it not mean anything to you, or that you don't feel anything when I feel so much"
"What are you talking about Woody? I never said that I don't feel anything when we kiss or that it doesn't mean anything"
"Whenever something happens between us you always pretend it didn't happen"
"What do you want me to do Woody? You know this is complicated"
"Well I'm sick of complicated, it's been complicated since we first met, but at least back then I could deal with it. I mean I thought you were beautiful and I was very much attracted to you but I didn't really know you then. Now I do know you and I want to be with you because of who you are, that's who I care about, it's not just a crush anymore Jordan and it hurts when you pretend there's nothing between us, knowing how much I want to be with you"
She laughed and shook her head. "You don't want to be with me Woody, you just think you do. You're only interested in me because I've always kept you at arms length; it was a challenge to you. If we actually got together you would be disappointed, and then you'd be out the door"
He stared at her in disbelief. "How can you sit here and say that to me after everything we've been through?"
"Because it's true Woody! You love the idea of me, of obtaining the unobtainable. You don't love me," she said somberly.
"If you really believe that then you don't know me at all" he said staring into her eyes.
He got up and walked to the door. "You always say you don't deserve me, you act like you don't deserve to be loved by anyone, and maybe you're right," he said looking out into the distance. "I can't keep handing you my heart just to have you throw it back at me"
He left her sitting alone; his words had cut into her savagely. She felt as if someone had kicked her in the stomach. How could he have been so mean?
Neither of them got much sleep that night. Woody was contemplating why he kept putting himself through this? Why couldn't he just leave her alone? He sighed deeply when he realized the answer to his own question. It was because he loved her. Jordan was thinking about how much fun she and Woody always had when they were together, and especially how comfortable she had been on this trip with his family. She knew she loved him too but she was scared, scared of loving him and being loved by him.
"So what kind of wedding are you wand Woody going to have?" his mom asked hopefully.
"Um Woody and I aren't even together, what makes you ask that?"
"My son talks about you all the time and when he does I can hear the smile in his voice, he loves you something awful. I think you love him too, you just haven't realized it yet"
She blushed embarrassed, wondering if this was true.
"Mrs. Hoyt, Woody is great, he really is and I would be lucky to have him but he deserves so much better than I could ever be," she said honestly.
Just then the boys returned home. "I know that's not true" his mom told Jordan, finishing their conversation. No one bothered to inquire what they were talking about.
Jordan noticed that Woody still wasn't paying much attention to her. Later, after everyone had gone to bed he went outside to sit on the porch. Jordan's window faced that direction so when she saw him sitting alone she decided to join him.
"Hey" she said sitting down beside him.
"Hey"
"What are you thinking about?" she asked
"You really want to know?" he asked, turning to her. She nodded that she did.
He leaned over to her and kissed her gently.
"That's what I was thinking about Jordan, that's all I can think about"
She watched him curiously. "So what exactly is the problem with that?"
"The problem is I don't understand how you can just kiss me like that and have it not mean anything to you, or that you don't feel anything when I feel so much"
"What are you talking about Woody? I never said that I don't feel anything when we kiss or that it doesn't mean anything"
"Whenever something happens between us you always pretend it didn't happen"
"What do you want me to do Woody? You know this is complicated"
"Well I'm sick of complicated, it's been complicated since we first met, but at least back then I could deal with it. I mean I thought you were beautiful and I was very much attracted to you but I didn't really know you then. Now I do know you and I want to be with you because of who you are, that's who I care about, it's not just a crush anymore Jordan and it hurts when you pretend there's nothing between us, knowing how much I want to be with you"
She laughed and shook her head. "You don't want to be with me Woody, you just think you do. You're only interested in me because I've always kept you at arms length; it was a challenge to you. If we actually got together you would be disappointed, and then you'd be out the door"
He stared at her in disbelief. "How can you sit here and say that to me after everything we've been through?"
"Because it's true Woody! You love the idea of me, of obtaining the unobtainable. You don't love me," she said somberly.
"If you really believe that then you don't know me at all" he said staring into her eyes.
He got up and walked to the door. "You always say you don't deserve me, you act like you don't deserve to be loved by anyone, and maybe you're right," he said looking out into the distance. "I can't keep handing you my heart just to have you throw it back at me"
He left her sitting alone; his words had cut into her savagely. She felt as if someone had kicked her in the stomach. How could he have been so mean?
Neither of them got much sleep that night. Woody was contemplating why he kept putting himself through this? Why couldn't he just leave her alone? He sighed deeply when he realized the answer to his own question. It was because he loved her. Jordan was thinking about how much fun she and Woody always had when they were together, and especially how comfortable she had been on this trip with his family. She knew she loved him too but she was scared, scared of loving him and being loved by him.
